Chapter Text
The Regular Goat stood in the middle of the road, staring ahead, flicking her ears. Occasionally, her head caught on fire. (A modification.)
A human walked past her.
The Goat narrowed her eyes.
The human continued walking.
The Goat considered headbutting him.
She did not.
The human would never know how close he had come to the queen of goats.
She had to stay still.
For... five minutes.
Five entire minutes.
...Agonizing five minutes. She desperately wanted to jump onto the grill, and headbutt the firework. She had to. But no.
She technically didn't have to stay completely still. She could have walked around, climbed buildings, or licked more stuff. She just wasn't allowed to hurt any humans.
...That approach hadn't worked last time. She hadn't even been attacking them on purpose.
The Goatest of All Time had to wait. And wait she would. Like a patient goat did.
The cars driving past her certainly surpassed the speed limit. The Goat nodded approvingly.
...
Do no harm
A halo appeared on her head. Finally.
The heavens themselves had witnessed her sacrifice.
They were impressed.
Mostly because nobody had expected her to succeed.
This had to be celebrated.
Normal Goat sprinted forward.
Charging straight at a firework.