Chapter Text
——————
Again, once again they’re alone. Pitaya had left their nest a while ago… What did they expect, that dragon was always on their feet.
… Now it’s just them …
It’s quiet…. Just them and their thoughts. Well, It’s never really quiet for them. Ever since their island has come to a loss, all they ever heard now were voices… Agonizing voices. The repeated screams of the mango tribe, the faint curses of their fallen cookies shouting towards them for help but in the end they failed to protect them, failed to protect what made themselves whole.
They really missed all of them, their joy, their singing that uplifted the islands. They never realized how much they took for granted until now.
Mango cookie…
Mango cookie. They still vividly see and hear Mango cookie greet them every day, just how bright he looked when arriving to give them his offerings… Such that they took for granted. Sometimes they would dream of a world where they truly appreciated everything their islanders did for them. They really wished that they were able to just say thank you…
They wondered if their tribe was watching over them now, and if they truly are… Were they sad when they saw how much they cried over the loss of everything? Were they disappointed when they started inflicting their calamity on others because of what happened? Did they die despising them because the one who claimed to be their “Protector” ended up being too weak to protect everyone in the end?
Well, who cares about how their tribe viewed them now.
They’re dead.
Nothing would change how they had to watch their island and everything they built on it with those cookies turn to nothing.
It’s a really pathetic story… A story that made them end up like this, a dragon now built off of pain and regret who ended up resorting to destruction, lashing out and projecting all of their pain and vengeance onto the world… The cruel, CRUEL world that took all they loved from them just like that.
Of course things like that bring traction, eventually the news spread, their island got taken off local maps, and the reports of their recent lash outs hit everywhere. In which those lash outs caused fear, and now they’re named “The Raging Calamity” by the cookies who fear them.
Back then, they would feel some kind of way about this. “They’re too high to resort to leveling the towns of cookies.” They would probably say. Oh, how prideful they used to be. Now, what they deemed un prideful brings them a weird sense of satisfaction, though that high doesn’t last nearly as long as they wanted.
They knew how cookies seen them, but sometimes they also think about the other dragons and what they thought.
They didn’t really care about the whereabouts of the other dragons. They believed that the dragons thought of them with nothing but pity if they were ever brought up. They really don’t have it in themselves to care anymore. What was left to care about anyways?
Maybe if they weren’t so attached to cookie kind, they wouldn’t have ended up this way.
Maybe they were wrong.
And Longan, the one who took it all from them ended up being right.
…… They need some air.
——————
The dragons valley wasn’t as different as they remembered. It’s been a while since they’ve been here anyways. They really had no reason to come here back then… They had their island before, now they don’t.
They had a disguise on, similar to the one Pitaya had on when they went to that bar. It wasn’t so bad, at least people wouldn’t recognize them and scream. (Screaming brought bad memories.)
…There was a place in the distance…
Was it a tribe…? No, a village. It’s not that small but definitely well-sized. This isn’t the one Blinding- Pitaya took them to after they first made that agreement. They wondered if Pitaya was thinking about their whereabouts right now.
…Probably not.
They’re going to go anyways, it’s not that far.
———
This place is… lively to say the least. The noise here is tolerable though, thankfully to them.
It was a mix of homes, shops, and restaurants… Hm, was there a bar nearby? They felt for a drink, to get their mind off things… But they’re sure that they may be lost… Great…
“Hello, sir! Are you new here? I haven’t seen a cookie look as lost as you in a while-”
Ananas turned towards the voice behind them rather violently, that certainly startled them good. This cookie is lucky that they didn’t end up going on the defensive.
Silence hung between them before the cookie started talking again awkwardly. “Uhh.. I didn’t mean to give you such a fright! Let me introduce myself, I’m Baharat Cookie and I’m one of the village’s tour guides! Well…. I’m off right now but I can’t just not help someone new!”
Ananas just stared at the cookie, they jumped over a simple cookie..? Sometimes they get like that to loud noises.. Yes, they can’t help it and they know that, but it doesn’t make it any less embarrassing…
“… Hello?? Sir, are you okay?” The cookie asks, concern written all over their face.
“Yes.. I’m fine.. What was your name again..?”
“Ahh.. I’m Baharat Cookie pleased to meet you! What’s your name?”
“… Ananas dra-“ The now gray-haired dragon stopped their introduction. They… shouldn’t say that name here.
“Ananas.. My name is Ananas cookie.”
“Ananas cookie… Hm, so you’re definitely not from here! Didn’t expect to see a tropical cookie around the village, to say the valley much less…”
Ananas didn’t really want to talk, they didn’t come here to have a short talk with a cookie. They just wanted to get what they wanted and leave.
“Well…. How about I show you around..?“ The cookie offers, waiting for Ananas’s answer.
“No need, but can you.. take me to your village’s bar?”
“Of course! I knew you needed a guide somewhere, well you’ve met the right cookie!”
…
This cookie talks too much, he hasn’t stopped talking since they’ve met.
Ananas and the cookie were walking together, Ananas wasn’t that far behind the other. While the cookie spoke about whatever came to their mind or something related to their village, Ananas just listened, they were in their own train of thought.
The cookie seemed to know a lot about this place, well he did say that he worked as a tour guide so it wasn’t much of a surprise. As expected this village was liberated by Pitaya dragon, or as they now call them “Blinding flames of glory.” It was liberated long ago which made them be worshipped here daily. It’s a common story but this cookie seems to know so much about it…
Listening to the cookie wasn’t so bad, it took their mind off of things they commonly thought about. They would just nod or say something short when Baharat Cookie listed a fun fact or pointed something out. (There was a statue of Pitaya they passed by but that was expected but not what they were looking for)
Hm… This cookie really is quite knowledgeable, it’s not hard to see that their village’s history fills them with pride…
Just like-
“Here we are, our village bar!”
Ananas snapped out of their own thoughts as they stared at the bar. The bar was smaller than the usual ones they’ve seen before, but still decent for one. From the windows, they could see that there weren’t many cookies inside, more cookies were talking and drinking outside the bar. At least it would be more quiet in there, and now they no longer needed this cookie to guide them. (Ananas actually really liked the cookies talking, but they’d rather be alone… would they?)
“Thank you… I’ll take my leave now.”
“Of course, if you ever need me again related to something about this village, I’ll be around here!”
…. It’s been a while since someone willingly helped them out, besides Pitaya, of course.
Maybe, it wouldn’t be too bad to let the cookie stay… Would they ever see this cookie again after this…? It hasn’t even been that long since they’ve met this cookie, they literally met him today. Yet that cookie feels so familiar… No… He’s not-
Let him… let him stay… they’ll ask him to stay.
Ananas stood facing the entrance of the bar. Silence continued before they turned back, looking at the cookie. “…. Baharat Cookie, would you like to accompany me..?
“Huh? Of course! I’m still off, so I could use a drink or two.”
———
Drinking helped a lot with their thinking. They never really were a fan of such things before. But now it really helps out, helps out when they wanted to stop thinking, to stop worrying, and forget.
But of course, you can’t forget forever. In the end, you’ll always come back to reality. No matter if it’s good or bad or how long it takes.
But this cookie, this cookie. Reminds them so much, so much of someone they wished were never lost.
“Ananas cookie, if you don’t mind if I ask… what made you come here anyways?” Again with the questions..
They can’t just say it outright so lying wouldn’t hurt. “Uh… a friend that I haven’t seen in a while lives around here, and I came to visit but ended up finding this village first.”
“Really? I’m sure that friend is going to be very happy to see you. You’re good company! Usually, other tourists would tell me to be quiet by now, but I can’t help it… Speaking about my village and our savior gives me a lot of joy..”
Hm, Joy.
They feel really numb, not much from the alcohol but really from everything. They wished that there were still ones who worshipped them, ones who get joy from the mention of their name.
They wished for their tribe.
“Sir…?”
It should’ve been them, they should’ve still had everything they loved.
These cookies… These cookies don’t deserve to still have their joy.
No.
“Sir…? Are you okay?”
These cookies don’t deserve to have what their whole tribe lost.
Undeserving.
This… This cookie doesn’t deserve to remind them so much of him.
“You’re… freaking me out?? Sir??”
So much of Mango cookie.
That cookie isn’t him, can’t ever be him.
No.. no..
These cookies don’t deserve their lives.
“Sir????”
Lives that their tribe once had.
“Ananas cookie! Seriously what’s going on-“
Ananas arose from their seat violently, the force rattled the table enough for an empty bottle to stumbled and fall, shattering into pieces on the ground. It was like all commotion in the bar had stopped, all noises get replaced with the watchful eyes of many cookies, a sea of cookies who all have their eyes on them.
Waiting for something to happen.
They need to go... They NEED to leave and get as far away from here as possible.
“..I must go. It’s urgent, goodbye.”
“-Wait!”
Clamp-
Before Ananas could fully walk away and leave a hand urgently reached out and grabbed onto their wrist.
Baharat Cookie.
“Ananas cookie?? You can’t just leave like that, what’s going on!”
“..let go of me.”
“Just tell me what’s going on, I’m sure I can help-“
“I SAID LET GO!” Ananas roared out…. enraged?
They didn’t know what they were feeling right now, all they know is that everything getting louder, Those voices are getting louder.
“Ananas cookie… I know that only met you recently but really, if you have any trouble’s I’ll always be there to help! Me and this whole village will always welcome you and have your back.”
They wondered how much life hated or loved them to bring a cookie like this to their aid.
But in the end.
This cookie will never be him.
Ananas stared at Baharat Cookie, empathetically before pulling their hand out of the other’s grasps, giving one last look before walking out the bar.
Soon everyone in that bar ended up just going back to what they were doing but Baharat? They felt like something very bad was about to happen… They just hoped that Ananas cookie were okay.
———
They needed to leave, they really do.
What did they do wrong to lose everything, why did it need to be them.
It hurts.
Destroy them all.
Why should you let them have what you don’t?
They don’t deserve it.
They’re hurt.
Why watch them be full of pride when you lost all of yours?
Will you continue to wait?
Take revenge.
They will hurt.
Those cookies will hurt.
——————
Screams. The screams of cookies.
“EVERYONE WATCH OUT-“
The village was experiencing nothing more but a disaster. The atmosphere filled with the panic and dread of its people trying to think about what they might do next.
Parents hugging their children, guards ushering people to evacuate, people choosing to stay and be with what they worked so hard for.
It was like you could feel the sorrow of cookies making decisions without knowing who was about to witness their very end.
Flames.
No one truly knew what happened, nor how this chaos started.
They just knew who caused it.
Everyone wondered why The Raging Calamity chose their village to destroy, but in the end no cookie truly knew why.
Regret.
Beyond the dragon’s faint silhouette through the smoke and ash. If you somehow managed to get a glimpse of their face, you can see the dragons face filled with something you can only view as pain and regret.
But where did that regret come from? Well, no one could tell you.
Why were they feeling pain over causing others pain??? Shouldn’t they be happy?
They got what they wanted, they acted on their revenge.
And oh Baharat Cookie, the cookie who was cursed to never figure out that they were the cause, the main reason why the dragon had brought their calamity to the village. As they already were fatally killed during the chaos, the bar was the first place affected.
Ananas wondered if Baharat cookie would forgive them, that’s if they had survived.
Would he forgive them for taking what brought that cookie pride.
But were they dead or alive? Ananas will never truly know.
…..
Getting revenge didn’t even bring them the joy they thought it would, it made them feel even more horrible than before. Was this even what they wanted? Is this what their tribe wanted?
They failed way more than enough times, why did they need to fail more?
Why were they such a failure, why is it always them?
Life for everyone would be so much better if they didn’t exist. No one would need to suffer because of them, because of their past mistakes. If they were to die right now they would be with their tribe, everything they experienced while conscious would just go away.
..And they would be happy, everyone would be happy.
But why can’t they just do it? End their life here and now so they can finally find peace, what’s holding them back. Was it their anger? Their seeking of revenge?? ..Was it Pitaya…?
Hm, Pitaya.
What would Pitaya think right now, this was their village they liberated before Ananas ruined everything after all.
How can they even show themselves back in their nest?
Should they abandon that dragon..? No.. they don’t want to be alone, not again.
They don’t want to inflict further damage on this village, there is no point to if they feel this hopeless. They’ll just go back to pitaya’s nest, hopefully they can just forget and sleep.
——————
Ananas landed when they got to Pitaya’s nest, slowly walking past the swords of fallen warriors Pitaya defeated over time. It was a physical proof of the dragons glory, something Ananas had entirely lost.
The cave was hotter than usual, Pitaya must be there.
They’re… happy about that, they won’t be alone.
But how.. how do they tell Pitaya what they’ve done, would pitaya end up kicking them out? Will they be forgiven?
Walking to the entrance of the cave Pitaya, as bright as ever was lounging in their dragon sized bed that resided in the middle of their nest with a face that represented nothing more than a fit of boredom.
Pitaya ended up seeing Ananas at the entrance of the cave, with the light that illuminates inside the nest it would be hard not to see them.
“Ananasss? I didn’t expect you to leave, I thought you would jussst ssstay in my nest!” Pitaya exclaimed, were they surprised..? They couldn’t really see it on the others face.
“….”
Pitaya’s face scrunched up in a mix annoyance and something else due to being answered with silence. “Sssilent, huh? …..It’sss ssstill weird to sssee you thisss quiet.”
“….You know that I’m not who I used to be.”
“Yeah, yeah…” Pitaya rolls their eyes, that was the obvious wasn’t it?
Hm… The more that the other dragon walked into the nest, the more that Pitaya could see Ananas more close up, and now that they mentioned it.. Ananas seems a little shaken up, why???
“Ananasss, what happened for you to look like that?” Curiosity and confusion replaced the look of boredom Pitaya once shown on their face, what’s going on with them?
“Pitaya… Answer me this..” Ananas ignored Pitaya’s question before initiating their own while standing there, looking at Pitaya who was still rested in their nest.
“What’sss with the sssudden quessstionsss?” Pitaya grumbled, irritated from getting ignored again.
“If I did something.. not to your liking, would you leave me?”
Now Pitaya was confused, what’s a weird question? They knew that Ananas wasn’t ok mentally after everything that happened to them but now they’re just asking stupid questions.
“Huh?? What a stupid question!-“
“Would you leave me?”
“No?? What could YOU possssibly do that’sss that bad for me to abandon you? Quit asssking sssuch ssstupid questionsss….”
Ananasss felt relief, a gentle calm after all these other feelings they felt inside. Yet they also felt so guilty, how do they tell Pitaya what they did..? They simply wanted to sleep and forget.
Ananas walked over to where pitaya’s bed resided, sitting beside Pitaya dragon. The heat they emit made them a bit sleepy..
“Pitaya, can I..?”
“Hm..” Pitaya studied Ananas’s face, sighing before continuing. “Sssure, jussst don’t lay in one place for to long..”
Ananas fell forward into pitayas arms, closing their eyes as they let the heat coming from Pitaya envelop them.
Being this close, Pitaya can smell the scent of ash on the other dragon, actually Ananas reeked of it. Seriously what did Ananas get themselves into.
“You sssmell awfully like asssh.. what went on with you after you left??”
Ananas tensed up, they had to face it at some point didn’t they?
“… I originally left the nest to clear my head… East of here, there was a village. As expected it was one you liberated, you do control this valley after all.. I only went to go to a bar.. I got a bit lost, then a cookie came up to me and ended up helping me there..”
That cookie..
“They reminded me so much of them and I.. simply couldn’t accept that. I ended up spiraling and destroying the village. Not completely, I ended up feeling too horrible to do what I usually do.”
There was no answer from Pitaya, just silence… were they-
“HAH! Is THAT what you were ssso worried about? The cookiesss of the dragon’sss valley aren’t that wavering.. Did you expect me to be upssset? You never acted like thisss during all your other attacksss.
….
Pitaya was right, they never acted this sensitive. Maybe all these troubled thoughts made them soft, more soft to their liking.
Or maybe it was fear, fear of someone else leaving them too.
They make sure to keep everyone away but the moment someone gets close, they just never want to let go… Not even a little.
How pathetic they were to be dependent on someone like this, much less a dragon. But they already lost all their pride, what do they really have left for them to care about what’s pathetic or not.
They can truly admit that all they’re feeling right now is fear. Pitaya is basically all they’ve got left.
They don’t want to lose who they have left.
“Pitaya.. please.. please don’t leave me.” Ananas whispered out, Pitaya can feel Ananas trembling.
“…” Pitaya had never been good at such a thing as comforting, especially comforting a dragon. Ananas just sounded pathetic… They pity the other.
“Please.. I can’t be alone.. not again…”
Ananas was holding onto Pitaya tightly, like if they let go, Pitaya would go like the rest of them. It’s been surprisingly a while since they’ve last cried, that last time being when they lost their island. They just felt so empty that nothing would come out when they tried or felt like it. All they felt until now was a whole bunch of bundled up feelings waiting to come out.
“Pitaya…” Ananas croaked out, as they cried into the other’s arms.
Crying for once made them feel way better than how they’ve felt in a while, maybe they should try to cry more often.
Ananas sobbed as they clung onto Pitaya, tears falling and sizzling up as they fell onto Pitaya’s shoulder. Hearing the once prideful dragon cry was unusual to say the least. Pitaya simply looked down, aimlessly messing with the other’s gray hair with a face that could only resemble someone in thought. One could only wonder wants going on in that dragons mind while Ananas cried into their shoulder.
Ananas didn’t need an answer from Pitaya, not any of that basic comforting. They just wanted them there, nothing else.
Soon Ananas went silent, slumped over as sleep took over them. Maybe this once Ananas can sleep reassured that they’re not alone, not anymore.
Yes, what went on in the past will always exist, that you can’t change.
Yet now is all that matters.