Chapter Text
Min Yoongi didn't like boys.
Never even thought about boys in that way, never thought of anyone in that way really, but he especially did not like boys.
Kim Seokjin was not a boy.
He couldn't be, he didn't count, he wasn't included in the male species. He's just something. It's the only logical answer that seventeen year old Yoongi could come up with and he decided to stick with it, because why the flying fuck else would his heart be malfunctioning every time the elder would so much as glance his way.
He had thought that Kim Seokjin was a problem to begin with, but little did he know that a storm was just up ahead.
***
Yoongi rubs at his eyes, lazily rolling over in an attempt to further bundle himself into the blanket. Instead of his bed he finds himself toppling over the edge of the couch, his side banging into the hardwood floor. His eyes shoot open, the sight of an empty room welcoming him. He groggily sits up from the floor, rubbing at his side with a frown, trying to recall why he was sleeping in the couch in the first place.
His mood instantly sours as memories of the day's earlier events come back to him. He acted rashly, letting his anger get the best of him. He should've just confronted the boy head on, dealt with whatever he wanted and left without any regrets.
But he ran.
He ran like he always does because Min Yoongi is nothing but a coward.
He dragged Jimin along with him too without any explanation.
He sighs in frustration, face falling into his palms as he tries to think of a way to explain this to the younger and to somehow apologize.
Yoongi decides that winging it is probably his best option.
“Jimin?” he calls out, getting no answer in return.
He tries to listen for any sign of life, the sound of Jimin’s keyboard clicks, the shower running, or even a faint mumble of a movie playing from Jimin’s phone. He's met with nothing but silence.
He texts the boy a simple ‘hey where’d you go’ before turning off his phone and slumping back down into the couch.
All he can do now is wait.
***
“Yoongi-ah~” a sweet voice calls out
“Mmm” he smiles fondly at the voice of the boy behind him.
“C’mere I have to tell you something”
“What is it?” he questions, turning around.
“I want you to m-”
Yoongi jerks awake with a pounding headache, and an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.
Yoongi is, for the most part, over it, but whether he likes it or not, he's affected by Kim Seokjin. He always has been and always will. It's been years, he's had enough time to heal, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt anymore. Seokjin had broke him.
Perhaps Yoongi should've seen it coming, ah but love (something that took him years to admit he had felt) is blinding.
Without him even realizing everything became about Seokjin.
All his thoughts, his concerns, and even his decisions had revolved around the elder boy. Would Seokjin think this was cool? Would he be there? Would this make him like me?
It's was stupid, beyond idiotic to be honest. The problem was that he knew that it wasn't a good idea to be so obsessed with someone, he was aware that things could easily come crashing down and leave him heartbroken. But who was he to care, it's was just a little crush right? It would go away eventually.
It never did.
He couldn't blame himself entirely, Seokjin definitely didn't help with his problem.
He'd take Yoongi out for lunch dates, write him cute little sticky notes, text him constantly (something that easily became the highlight of Yoongi’s day). He'd always say hi or make weird faces whenever they'd pass each other in the hallways. Seokjin would do the stupidest things to make him smile.He was just so caring and sweet, he showed Yoongi so much affection.
Yoongi was happy.
He was so in love.
And he thought Seokjin was too.
He was wrong of course.
Yoongi just wasn’t what Seokjin wanted, wasn’t enough for him.
But Yoongi found that out much too late.
He shivers at the memory of what had happened that day.
The day the boy who he had adored, who made him feel loved, who was his everything, came waltzing into the room with another man in his arms and a huge smile on his face. All he said was a single, cheerful sentence.
“I want you to meet my boyfriend”
And Yoongi broke.
He wasn't even angry at the time, everything was just still.
He remembers leaving with a mumbled “I’m happy for you” before storming out.
Seokjin had followed after him, chasing him down the hall.
“I thought you would understand-” Seokjin had started, worrying at his bottom lip.
“I-it’s okay, really” he said with a smile, the tears forming at the corners of his eyes ruining his attempt at playing it cool.
“Yoongi I-”
“It's okay” he whispered softly, “it's all my fault, I understand. I-” The tears burned trails down his soft cheeks, his voice got quieter with each word, “I was stupid. I really am happy for you.”
“Hey-” Seokjin tried to move towards Yoongi, but the boy was already half way down the hall before he got to say another word.
Yoongi found solace in an empty classroom, back hitting against the wall and he slid down to the floor, sobs echoing throughout the empty room.
He hit weakly at his chest, it hurts .
“Why did you do this to me, you lied, you made me think it was safe, you told me to follow you, I trusted you” he choked out between sobs, hitting harder at his heart. Yoongi wasn't sure if he was talking to his heart or Seokjin and this point, but it didn't really matter.
Everything was aching .
And what hurt most isn't that Seokjin didn’t reciprocate his feelings, isn't even the fact that the boy had the audacity to show Yoongi his new lover and be proud, even though he knew damn well how the younger felt.
No, it was that he was stupid enough to believe that Kim Seokjin actually fucking cared.
Min Yoongi really didn't like boys.