Chapter Text
Caleb had been gone for three days to deal with some sort of magical incident. Apparently, entire buildings were disappearing overnight and Caleb had a plan for how to stop that. Ben may have accused him of trying to avoid diaper duty rather than actually having a plan, but Caleb went off and the other two split the joy of changing newborn diapers.
When Caleb finally returns, Steve is also at the house, helping Eliza and Ben plan the backyard setup for Anne and Douglas’ wedding in a few weeks. He is the first to hear Caleb talking to his cargo.
“Settle down, you. There’ll be plenty of food in just a minute.” Caleb comes into the kitchen with a large planter pot in his arms. That wouldn’t be so remarkable if it weren’t for the swaying purple tentacles draped over the lip of the pot.
“Caleb,” Eliza says in an even voice. “What the hell is that?” Caleb looks at the three adults gathered at the kitchen table, then back at his cargo.
“This is Otto,” he says, meeting their gazes once again. “I got him for the house. He’ll be like a guard dog, cept he’ll clean up mess rather than make it.” Caleb brings the pot over to the table and sets it in front of Steve. The tentacles begin waving around. “You may not want to touch him just yet, though.”
“Why, what happens if we touch it?” Ben says. Nat is already walking towards the table with his hands outstretched, so Ben scoops him up quickly.
“Otto is still a little untrained at the moment and he may try to eat you,” Caleb admits. “Diomara’s making him a little charm so he won’t hurt us or friendlys. It’ll be ready tonight. In the meantime, we train him to eat garbage.” Caleb goes over to the trashcan by the counter. He takes the bag out of the can and brings it to Otto. The purple tentacles wave excitedly as Caleb holds the bag over it.
“Caleb-” Eliza’s warning is cut off by Caleb dropping the bag onto Otto. The tentacles catch the bag and begin stuffing it into the center of the pot.
“Bon appetit, Otto,” Caleb says.
“Bon appetit!” Nat repeats, clapping his hands. The bag slowly disappears. Ben is mildly impressed.
“That could have been very messy,” Steve observes.
“This could solve the landfill problem,” Eliza says, eyes glittering. “A few of these in a dump could clear out those mounds of trash-”
“Exactly my thinking, Liza Love,” Caleb says proudly. “There was a whole pack of these babies eating buildings, so me and Barton relocated them to landfills and waste pits all over the place. Should help out a bit.”
“That’s fantastic!” Eliza says.
“You were saying something about this being a guard dog?” Ben asks. Caleb nods.
“Once Diomara sets up the charms, we can plant him outside,” he says. “Anyone tries to intrude, Otto will grab them up and eat them. Diomara will make it so they actually end up in a pocket dimension and not die, so we can actually see who it was, but still.”
“That works,” Ben says, nodding. “Maybe you should keep him outside before that, in case of little hands being curious…” He has to keep Nat from leaning to Otto again.
“Oh, yeah,” Caleb says. “I’ll do that…”