Chapter Text
Bakugou develops a theory that’s utterly new to nofuckingbody in the world but like it doesn’t deter him from unifying some shit: existence has no narrative. As in, everything is actually really really pointless, and there are no heroes and there are no gods and only emptiness reigns.
Sometimes, he doesn’t know why he wakes up in the mornings.
Bakugou’s always liked a great story - conventional ones. Beginning, middle, end. Resolutions. The antagonist faces justice, and evil exists to prove that good will always win. Bakugou fucking loves the metric of morality because it’s so integral to what he wants for his life: a plot with a defined confusion. In other words, a meaning.
That day the teacher let slip that Midoriya was also applying to Yuuei - Bakugou has to be reminded that he’s not the focus character in a computer simulation, following an objective that will eventually lead him to a victorious end. There are other people pursuing their own magnificent and pointless and magnificently pointless dreams, and Midoriya Izuku is one of them, and Midoriya’s dream is unfortunately also Bakugou’s: to become the number one hero. Bakugou sort of faintly remembers that in every anime, the hero has rivals along the way. Just because someone has a dream doesn’t mean that they’ll always achieve it, and he knows that he realistically has the upper hand - except, Midoriya’s just such a fucking perfect shonen manga hero. Scrawny, underdog, ambiguously gay - he’s a chunibyuu wet dream come true, and Bakugou snaps.
His suspicions are only worsened when Midoriya somehow passes the entrance exams, and by some miracle that would completely fuck the laws of human reproductive biology, gains a quirk.
The first few weeks of Yuuei is hell. People actually try to get to know him. It’s fucking horrible. Why would someone do that? Bakugou can’t understand why they can’t just shut up and be the side characters that they all obviously are. Then the most evillest thing in the world fucking happens when an ineffectual comic foil character becomes the first person to ever understand Bakugou.
Kirishima Eijirou is an annoying goody two-shoes. His hair is tacky, and his costume design doesn’t make sense. He’s perfect filler episode material. Bakugou would even bet that bitch would be the fandom unfavorite. Pretentious fucker wouldn’t stop ragging on Bakugou after the fight with Midoriya.
“What is wrong with you?” Kirishima had asked as Bakugou and Iida came back from the duel arena.
Bakugou only had to take a cursory look on the screen displays to know that his attempted murder of MIdoriya had been witnessed by his classmates. A lot of them threw dirty looks at him, or avoided looking him in the eye. He grunted when Kirishima stopped him and repeated the question.
“Why the fuck did you go that hard? He could’ve been killed.” Kirishima wouldn’t shut up. “What sort of hero would do that? You don’t use your quirk to hurt your friends - you use it to rescue them.”
Bakugou just walked past him. He had absolutely no interest at all in engaging Kirishima on the ethics of quirks usage within simulated scenarios, especially when Recovery Girl existed. Midoriya would be fine, so why make a big deal? Kirishima's a bitch.
It’s when mooks attack them at the Unforeseen Simulation Joint that Kirishima Eijirou detextualizes himself; he becomes a human being. Good fucking god.
Kirishima is like him. Kirishima understands. The first person who ever fucking figures Bakugou Katuski out uses cheap drug store dye and has awful aesthetic sense.
“You’re actually really logical, Bakugou,” Kirishima says. He’s smiling. Fucker is smiling at Bakugou.
Around them, mooks are lying, injured, on the floor. A lot of them are badly burned. Bakugou had stopped short of nearly killing them. Medium-rare, he considers it. A few moments ago, one of them tried to pull some shit on Bakugou when his back was turned - the key word being tried. Dumbfuck.
“I’m always logical, you fucking hair-for-brains,” Bakugou snaps back, not particularly because he’s actually offended but more because that’s what the situation seems to call for. It’s a way of escaping accountability for the weird emotions piling up inside him. The inside of his throat thickens. He’s almost relieved when Kirishima takes it in stride with easy laughter.
“Just fuck off, already,” Bakugou says. He has a plan to execute. He finally has a plot to follow. He turns to leave, when Kirishima yells.
“Wait up!”
Bakugou waits.
“I believe in my buddies,” Kirishima starts.
Oh fucking god.
“And you’re starting to sound real manly now, Bakugou.”
This isn’t happening. Bakugou turns around. Kirishima faces him with an even bigger smile than before. They both look into each other’s eyes. “I’m with you,” Kirishima says.
The boredom. The body of it weighing on Bakugou’s back doesn’t go away. Bakugou is still bored. The next day, he’ll still idly think about what it would be like to kill himself. He’ll still wonder why he even bothers to wake up if existing is so pointless. But.
But Kirishima’s with him.
Something about that does weird things to Bakugou’s heart.