Chapter Text
Daniel’s mind is at a standstill when he actually sits down and thinks about what kind of tattoo he should design for Jihoon. Before, he’d thought of just using the initials of his real name, but isn’t sure if Jihoon would appreciate Daniel’s name on his skin forever.
“Give me something to remember you by."
“What does that even mean?” Daniel groans, pen in his hand. He feels a warm hand caressing his shoulder as Jisung takes a seat beside him, giving the same comforting smile he’d seen two years ago.
“You must really like him,” Jisung muses, looking over the crossed-out designs on the paper he’d given to Daniel. “Otherwise you would never spend so long making a decision.”
Daniel ponders over what Jisung says. A part of him wants to refute, tell his friend that there’s absolutely nothing going on between him and Jihoon.
But he’d be lying. Daniel really likes Jihoon, and he can’t even place a finger on why.
“Am I doing the wrong thing, hyung?” Daniel gulps nervously. “Y-you know what happened to Jaehwan and Jonghyun when we were friends.”
Jisung raises an eyebrow in surprise, and Daniel understands. He’s never been the one to bring up the topic of his friends, and thank god Jisung has been sensitive enough to never press Daniel to talk about it. However, there’s a lump in his throat that he just can’t get rid of no matter how much he tries; and maybe, just maybe, Jisung can help him out.
“Niel,” Jisung lowers his voice after looking back at Jihoon, who is busy looking at the pictures in the other room. “Are you still blaming yourself for what happened?”
Of course he is, how can he not?
“It is my fault,” Daniel insists, blinking back the tears that have unconsciously formed in his eyes. “I don’t want Jihoon to face the same fate.”
Jisung nods slowly. “Listen, whatever happened that day? It wasn’t your fault. Neither is this thing you have going on with Jihoon. Talk to him, if he wants to stay, he’ll stay.”
What Jisung says makes sense, it always has. Daniel just can’t bring himself to believe it. Sometimes, when he closes his eyes, he can still hear Jaehwan’s hysterical laughter and he can still see Jonghyun’s soft smile as he watches them from a distance away.
“I’ll think about it, thanks hyung,” Daniel says. He finishes his design quickly and hands it over to Jisung’s waiting hands. “Take care of him for me. It’s his first time.”
Daniel is thankful for Jisung; for not leaving him in the lurch even though he has every reason to. Jisung has trusted him and his decisions for three years, so Daniel knows without a doubt that Jihoon will be in good hands.
Jihoon jumps slightly when a hand pats his right shoulder and a finger pokes his right cheek right after he turns to see who it is. Of course, it’s Daniel; grinning brightly when he sees Jihoon falling for his childish jokes.
“I’m done, Jisung hyung is waiting for you inside,” Daniel says, pointing into the room where he was with Jisung before.
Jihoon calms his nervous heart and hopes it doesn’t show on his face that he’s terrified. Never in his life has he thought of getting inked; he’s sure his mother is going to kill him when she finds out, but that’s the least of his worries right now. He thinks about Guanlin, and how he’s probably going to be so excited about his new tattoo.
Right, he’s doing this for his family.
“I’m ready,” Jihoon announces as he walks into the room, where Jisung is busy cleaning and preparing his instruments.
“Good,” Jisung smiles. “Where would you like to get the tattoo on?”
Yet another thing that Jihoon has never thought of before.
“If it’s not too big, maybe on my left collarbone?” Jihoon suggests.
Jisung makes a surprised noise as he glances at Daniel; who looks equally shocked at Jihoon’s choice.
“Is there something wrong with that?” he asks.
“Of course not,” Jisung assures after Daniel puts a finger to his lips which Jihoon infers must mean “I’ll tell him later” and lets Jihoon take a seat. Jihoon’s heart is thumping as Jisung does his last checks and hands his phone over to Daniel, who is supposed to record this down for him.
“Don’t cry,” Daniel teases. “You have 5,000 people watching.”
“5,000?” Jihoon repeats, shocked. The last time he checked, he’d had a little less than 500 people watching him. Ever since he’d teamed up with Daniel, the number had multiplied by 10 times. It’s crazy to think that there are so many people watching him, and it creeps Jihoon out to think that there might be someone he knows watching as well.
“I’m ready,” Jisung says. “You have to take your shirt off if you want me to do it on your collarbone.”
Daniel whistles loudly, making Jihoon blush as he slips out of his shirt easily.
“You should see how fast your watcher count is increasing,” Daniel comments, then adds, “I’m a little jealous, I don’t want so many people looking at you like this.”
“Shut up,” Jihoon says, throwing his shirt at Daniel.
“This might hurt,” Jisung warns as he leans in to start. Jihoon takes one last deep breath and grips onto the edges of the chair to prepare for the pain to hit him.
Jihoon would be lying if he said it didn’t hurt. It did, he could feel the needles piercing into his skin every second and his bottom lip is numbing from biting too hard on it. He feels the needle being lifted from his skin for a moment, and opens his eyes.
“You okay?” Daniel asks, concern ridden all over his face.
“Had better days,” Jihoon groans, trying to sneak a peek at what Jisung has finished so far when Daniel stops him. “Hey! Look at it only when Jisung hyung is done!”
“Alright, alright,” Jihoon relents. Jisung chuckles, and begins again. This time, it hurts just a little less. Jihoon tries to take his mind off the pain by thinking about how happy his mother would be once he could pay the debt collectors back.
And Guanlin wouldn’t have to live in fear and guilt anymore.
“It’s finished,” Jisung says, waking Jihoon up from his thoughts. “Go look at it in the mirror.”
Jihoon can’t tell by the grin on Daniel’s face if he’s satisfied with how the tattoo turned out or if he’s just been made a joke in front of 5,000 people. Daniel follows Jihoon to the mirror and watches Jihoon’s expression closely as he scrutinizes his new tattoo.
The area around his collarbone is an angry red, but Jihoon can still make out the silhouette of two birds with their wings spread out. Under the two birds are smaller letters;
PJH & KEG
“KEG?” Jihoon says out loud. “Are those the initials of your real name?”
Daniel nods, whispering, “Not going to tell you what it is yet, though.”
Jihoon smiles, he loves it. He’d wanted something to remember this day and Daniel by; and this is the perfect way to do it.
“Want me to show you something?” Daniel asks.
Jihoon nods, and Daniel proceeds to take his shirt off. Before Jihoon’s eyes can feast on Daniel’s rock-hard abs or tan skin, he spots something on Daniel’s left collarbone.
It’s the exact same two birds, in the same position.
“Wow,” Jihoon gushes, suddenly embarrassed at the fact that they both have matching tattoos.
“I know,” Daniel says enthusiastically. “I was shocked when you picked your left collarbone. I suppose this is fate?”
Jihoon knows Daniel means the last part of his sentence in a teasing manner, but he can’t help but wish that fate really did bring the two of them together. They put on their shirts, and Jihoon sees the $400 being deposited into his bank account.
“I’ll wait outside for you,” Daniel says when he catches Jisung’s eye and walks outside.
Jihoon walks up to Jisung and says, “Thank you. The tattoo is beautiful.”
“You’re very welcome,” Jisung says and suddenly takes Jihoon’s hands in his. “Remember to trust Niel. He’s a good boy who has bad things happened to him. I think you’ll do just fine with him.”
After Seongwoo and Minhyun have said nasty things about Daniel to his face, it’s nice to finally hear good things about Daniel from someone as trustworthy as Jisung.
“I trust him,” Jihoon insists. He knows Daniel is hiding something from him; but he’s sure it’s more for his own good. He lowers his gaze, “I want to ask him what’s wrong, but he’s a little… distant sometimes.”
Jisung nods and says, “Ask him what the two birds on his collarbone mean to him.”
With one last hug, Jihoon bids Jisung goodbye. Jisung’s worrying gaze lingers for a moment when he looks at Jihoon, but is replaced with a smile immediately.
“Stay safe,” Jisung says to the two as they take their places in Daniel’s truck again.
“Bye hyung!” Daniel waves goodbye one final time before speeding off into the night.
The two birds on Daniel’s collarbone meant everything to him. He’d decided to get the tattoo early this year. It wasn’t a dare; the watchers knew Daniel was afraid of bigger things than inking his skin.
He’d gone to Jisung’s tattoo store and told his friend exactly what he wanted, and Jisung didn’t even had to ask why; he agreed immediately.
The two birds represented Jaehwan and Jonghyun – the very two people Daniel would love forever; and who he knew were flying high in the sky right now.
For $600: Go to Daehwi’s house
“Daehwi?” Jihoon repeats. He knows Daehwi, he would even consider them pretty good friends, even if they don’t talk or hang out much.
Daehwi is Woojin’s best friend, which is really how Jihoon met the other boy in the first place.
“Any idea why the watchers would want you to be there?” Daniel asks as Jihoon punches Daehwi’s address into the GPS. Jihoon shakes his head – he’s only been to Daehwi’s house once, because Woojin had dragged him to attend a party.
“Live a little,” Woojin had told him.
The party was terrible, Jihoon hated everything about it.
“College student Kang Daniel would be a party animal,” Daniel says, smiling to himself. “This is going to be fun.”
Of course – Daehwi was probably having a party right now; which was why the watchers would want him to be there. It would be torture for Jihoon; to show up suddenly with Daniel next to him and draw so much attention to himself.
And God forbid Woojin to be there as well. Jihoon didn’t leave on a good note; he’s sure Woojin is still pissed at him for taking off like that.
“Fun,” Jihoon mumbles, focusing his vision on the road ahead.
Jihoon has to hand it over to Daehwi. It’s ass-o-clock in the morning, but the party has just started. He can hear the blaring music from where Daniel has parked his truck. For a moment, he wonders how no one has called the cops yet; then remembers that Daehwi is a rich kid who owns this entire plot of land.
“I feel sick,” Jihoon says as they near Daehwi’s house. He doesn’t mean he’s gotten a cold; he just feels sick to the stomach, like something bad is going to happen.
“You’re going to be fine,” Daniel assures. “You have me!”
Jihoon doesn’t have the heart to tell Daniel that he’s part of the reason Jihoon feels so nervous.
“You’re afraid of getting judged,” Daniel comments. “These are all people from your school, am I right?”
Jihoon nods nervously. By now, the news that he was playing Nerve would have already spread throughout the entire school. There was no doubting it; he had already destroyed the reputation he’d so carefully constructed for himself.
Suddenly, Daniel grabs his hands and intertwines his fingers with Jihoon’s.
“Fuck them,” Daniel says. “Let’s show them who you really are. Ready?”
Jihoon stands frozen with Daniel outside Daehwi’s door and raises his hands to knock, then figures the music is too loud for anyone to hear the knocking on the door, and settles for swinging the door open instead.
Badass, right?
A few familiar faces turn in confusion when the door swings open, all wondering who the visitor announcing his presence in such a powerful way is, and break out into smiles when they recognise Jihoon – and the man he’s holding hands so tightly with.
Then, a roar of cheers erupt and phones are shoved into Jihoon’s and Daniel’s faces. He tries ignoring the flash and focuses on looking for Woojin.
The crowd spreads like Moses and the Red Sea to reveal Woojin and Daehwi standing at one corner of the room.
“Hey,” Jihoon says when he’s finally close enough to talk to them.
“Jihoon,” Woojin says, his expression serious. “You have to stop playing this game before you get hurt.”
“I’m fine, aren’t I?” Jihoon reasons, somehow saying it more for himself than for Woojin to believe. “Plus, Daniel is helping me. I’m going to be okay.”
Woojin glares at Daniel who is standing behind Jihoon.
“You don’t even know who he is,” Woojin sighs. “And yet, you trust him more than you trust me?”
Jihoon feels Daniel’s grip tighten angrily, and shoots him a look to tell Daniel that “I’ll handle this”.
“Tell me who he is then,” Jihoon says through clenched teeth. He’s tired of everyone talking about Daniel like he’s bad luck, like he’s going to harm Jihoon. Seongwoo, Minhyun and Woojin had no idea what they were talking about.
“You seem to know him a lot better than I do,” Jihoon snaps. “Why don’t you say it to my face? Tell me who Kang Daniel is.”
Woojin remains calm, he always has been the calm one when they argue. Jihoon hates how nothing he says ever gets to Woojin.
“Can we get some privacy?” Woojin looks pointedly at Daniel.
“Fine.”
Woojin turns and goes upstairs, and Jihoon prepares to follow him when Daniel grabs his arm.
“Jihoon,” Daniel says in a hushed whisper. “I know I haven’t told you everything about me. That doesn’t mean what others say about me is true. They’ll twist my words, they don’t even know what happened that night-“
He can tell that Daniel is about to start panicking, so he cups Daniel’s face in his hands, not caring whether everyone in the house is staring at them or not.
“Daniel, listen to me, shh- it’s going to be okay,” Jihoon says calmly, making sure to look into Daniel’s eyes as he says it. “I’ll trust you no matter what. I’m just going to tell Woojin that you’re not a bad person, okay?”
Slowly, Jihoon feels Daniel’s breaths get more steady.
“Wait here for me?” Jihoon suggests.
Finally, Daniel nods.
Jihoon decides to lean in, and gives Daniel a light peck on his cheek as assurance that he’s not going to run away, and bounds up the stairs to look for Woojin.
He’s calmed down a bit since their confrontation downstairs, and Jihoon finally feels like he can have a proper conversation with Woojin without blowing up.
“So tell me,” Jihoon says when he enters the room Woojin is waiting in. “What’s your deal with Daniel?”
“It’s not just with Daniel,” Woojin sighs. “It’s with this entire game. Jihoon, people are getting hurt as we speak because of this stupid game. People have died! You’re doing things you’re not comfortable with, you even got a tattoo.”
Jihoon’s fingers instinctively brush over his tattoo protectively.
“Fine. I wasn’t comfortable before,” Jihoon admits. “But I need the money. Guanlin is working at a convenience store because of his shitty dad, and my mother is bending her back in front of others just to repay the debt her shitty husband left behind!”
Jihoon hates how he cries when he gets angry, and wipes his tears away angrily.
“There are better choices you could make,” Woojin reasons. “A normal part-time job sounds better than playing this stupid game.”
“You’re a watcher, aren’t you?” Jihoon asks, his anger rising again. “You’re also one of the reasons this game is harming me! You’re contributing to this community!”
“So now it’s my fault as well? Park Jihoon, snap out of it!”
Jihoon has never seen Woojin lose his temper. He’s afraid, really, to see Woojin finally lose his cool.
“This game is toxic,” Woojin adds. “Why do you think the watchers asked you to come here? They knew we’d fight like this. Nerve destroys your life. You think you’re winning when you’re losing everything around you. You think Daniel really cares about you?”
“Leave Daniel out of this,” Jihoon growls.
Jihoon can’t deny that everything Woojin says make sense. His dare only told him to come to the party; it never told him what exactly to do. The watchers wanted to watch Jihoon destroy his friendships.
“Daniel, Daniel, Daniel,” Woojin chants. “Jihoon, you don’t understand. He’s killed people.”
When Woojin finally drops the bomb, Jihoon has nothing to say to refute. There’s a huge lump in his throat and for some reason, his voice can’t come out. His heart feels heavy and his head starts to hurt.
“T-that’s not true,” Jihoon mumbles, now sounding unsure. “Daniel would never k-kill anyone.”
“Really?” Woojin asks, cocking his head to the side. “For the million dollars grand price, I think anyone would do anything if they were crazy enough.”
“Daniel isn’t crazy!” Jihoon lashes out at Woojin, then steps back a second later, shocked at how fast he jumped in to defend Daniel.
But he’d promised to believe in Daniel. And he’s going to uphold that promise to the end.
“And he didn’t kill anyone,” Jihoon continues, his voice more steady now. He knows it deep down, that Daniel would never kill anyone, even if he had to win. Daniel would never resort to something so beneath him. “I believe in him.”
“You two have a lot of talking to do,” Woojin sighs.
Just then, Jihoon’s phone rings to save him from this situation. It’s not Daniel, and Jihoon feels his heart drop for the second time.
For $1,000: Go to the rooftop.
“Don’t do it,” Woojin warns. “You can bail and stop now.”
“And forgo all my money?” Jihoon challenges. “I don’t think so, Woojin. You’re my friend, but I don’t think you understand me right now. I’m sorry.”
With that, Jihoon presses on “Accept dare” and slams the door shut behind him.
The crowd from the party has already gathered at the uppermost level of Daehwi’s house, which isn’t a good sign for Jihoon. He looks around for someone to explain the situation to him when Daniel pulls him in for a hug from behind.
“Hey,” Jihoon says into the crook of Daniel’s neck. “What’s going on?”
Daniel lifts his head to meet Jihoon’s eyes; and in that moment Jihoon knows he’ll never believe that Daniel would kill someone unless he said it himself.
“I saw people setting that up, and knew it had something to do with you,” Daniel’s voice trails off as he gazes towards the balcony.
And Jihoon sees it; the ladder stretching from the balcony to the other balcony of the next house.
“Shit,” Jihoon gasps as he moves closer to see how far they up from the ground. The ball in the pit of his stomach only starts to grow bigger – they’re about 5 stories up, but it looks terrifying now that Jihoon knows what the watchers want him to do.
“You d-don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” Daniel whispers. “It’s dangerous. Like, really, really, dangerous. You could die.”
“I’m going to do it,” Jihoon insists as he hands his phone over to Daniel.
He doesn’t know where he’s gotten this burst of courage. Maybe it’s from talking with Woojin from before or the want to believe that Daniel isn’t as dangerous as everyone says he is.
After a few seconds, Daniel agrees, “Okay. Take your time, go slow. The ladder is going to hold your weight, just make sure you don’t slip. I’ll be waiting for you on the other side, okay?”
Jihoon nods, and Daniel disappears from the crowd. Woojin is right, they have a lot of talking to do; which is why he’s going to complete this dare as quickly as he can.
“Park Jihoon.”
Jihoon turns around to find Woojin looking straight at him, then at the ladder he’s about to climb on.
“Are you fucking serious right now?”
Jihoon flinches at his friend’s use of profanity. Although he wants to say something equally spiteful back to Woojin, it isn’t the time. He sees Daniel appear at the other side of the ladder and nod to Jihoon, as if saying, “You can go whenever you want.”
“Look, Woojin,” Jihoon grabs his friends by the shoulder. “I might seem really crazy to you right now, but I promise you I know what I’m doing. I trust Daniel, and I trust myself. Can’t you trust me just this once too?”
After a few seconds that feel like hours to Jihoon, Woojin nods ever so slightly. That alone is enough to bring a smile to Jihoon’s face and for his confidence to grow again.
“Good. Hold my hand,” Jihoon instructs his friend as he climbs onto the balcony’s railings. Woojin grabs Jihoon’s hand quickly to steady him. He doesn’t let go until Jihoon goes on all fours on the ladder.
“Thanks, Woojin,” Jihoon says, “I knew I could count on you.”
“Go slow,” is all Woojin says in response.
Jihoon can feel all the eyes on him as he makes his first move. He hears the ladder creaking beneath him, and his eyes dart below. God, he’s so high up.
He doesn’t have the biggest fear of heights, but anyone on a ladder five storeys away from dying would feel frightened for sure.
“Jihoon, don’t look down,” Daniel calls out from the other side.
Jihoon slowly lifts his head to look at Daniel.
“Good, keep your eyes on me,” Daniel encourages Jihoon. “Don’t worry, you’re doing well. You’re going to make it. Just a little more and you’re here.”
And Jihoon follows what Daniel says; he keeps his eyes on Daniel as he begins to move his right hand forward, then his left leg. Followed by his left hand, and finishing up with his right leg. Repeat.
Daniel is saying something, and Jihoon can hear Woojin shouting something behind him, but his heart is beating so loudly, he can’t hear any of that.
When Jihoon feels his hand grab the railing of the balcony of the other side, he lets Daniel pull him over and pull him into his embrace. Jihoon’s legs have lost all their strength. Luckily, Daniel is there to hold him up by his waist.
“You did well,” Daniel says.
If the Jihoon coming to this party was terrified of being seen by people, the present Jihoon couldn’t care less.
Jihoon smiles and captures Daniel’s lips in front of everyone’s eyes.
During the kiss, Jihoon feels Daniel’s fingers brushing over his left collarbone, over his fresh tattoo.
“You ruined it,” Jihoon says when he feels Daniel smiling into the kiss again.
“Sorry,” Daniel replies, burying his face into Jihoon’s hair to hide his red cheeks. “Should we get going?”
Jihoon hears people cheering from the other side of the balcony, and Woojin is smiling at him with his snaggletooth showing as well. The pride in Jihoon’s heart grows, and knows everything between him and Woojin is cool now.
“Let’s go,” Jihoon affirms, running out of the house with Daniel’s hands tightly clasped in his.
“Wow, I’m in 5th place,” Jihoon marvels as he checks on the leader board when he gets into the truck with Daniel again. His watcher count has increased to almost 10,000 now. It reminds him of Seongwoo, they would be of similar watcher count now.
Jihoon wonders where Seongwoo is. As much as he detests the other boy for being annoying, he can’t help but worry about leaving him back there.
Daniel is first on the leader board, and Jihoon knows he’s probably going to win the game this year.
‘Hwang Minhyun’ is second, and Jihoon shudders as he remembers Minhyun’s piercing gaze from earlier.
Something else catches Jihoon’s attention. When he clicks on the profile at fourth place, a scream catches in his throat when he sees a familiar lanky figure being engulfed by flames.
It’s Seongwoo, looking desperate for a way out of the mess he’s created. At the bottom of Seongwoo’s profile, Jihoon sees the words:
For $5K: Set fire to the abandoned house in the woods.
Stupid, stupid, stupid is all Jihoon can think of as he watches Seongwoo helplessly run around from a watcher’s livestream of this moment.
Why isn’t anyone jumping in to help in?
“Quick, we have to go to Seongwoo,” Jihoon says as he taps on Daniel’s shoulders impatiently. “You can find out where this is, right? Go, now! He’s going to die if we don’t save him!”
As terrifying as it is to watch a livestream of someone he knows being on the brink of death, Jihoon can’t tear his eyes away.
“But Ji-“
“Daniel! We have to go now!” Jihoon shouts, not ready to listen to any of Daniel’s excuses. Without another word, Daniel speeds off.
Jihoon can only pray that someone jumps in to save Seongwoo before they arrive or it’s going to be too late.