Chapter Text
Chapter 2 – Hello and Good-bye
“Hey Kevin.”
“Saam!”
Kevin stood up from the chair he was sitting in and wrapped his arm around his littlest sister. Tessa smiled at his use of her childhood nickname. The hospital hallway was eerily quiet.
He pulled back to look at her. “I’m glad you decided to come, Mom said she wasn’t sure if you would. Casey should be here shortly.”
Tessa looked down at her feet. “I wasn’t sure that I should, but Scott…he…he said I…I don’t know what to say to him, Kev.”
Kevin knelt down in front of his little nephew. “Hi…which one is this?”
Tessa had to look down at her son sitting in the infant car seat, to be sure who she was holding. “Corbin.”
“Hi Corbin. Your Uncle Kev thinks it’s time to go in and say hi to your Grandpa.” He looked up at Tessa. “Use the kids as an ice breaker. Introduce them to each other.”
Kevin noticed a little pair of pink sparkly shoes behind Tessa. “And who is glued to the back of your pants there?” He poked his finger onto one of the shoes.
A pair of big green eyes peered out from between Tessa’s legs. “Hi Uncle Kevy.”
“Hi Princess. Are you being shy with Uncle?”
The auburn-haired, freckle-faced little girl nodded.
“Do you wanna come for a ride up on my shoulders?”
Nora nodded again.
“Come on then,” Kevin scooped Nora up and she squealed with delight as he stood up and she found herself perched well above her mother’s head. Tessa’s brothers definitely had received the ‘tall genes’.
“Where are the rest of your men?” he asked, looking around the hallway.
“Henry needed a quick bathroom pit stop. They should be here right away.”
Kevin nodded and then paused for a moment, tapping his fingers on the side of his leg. He was trying to figure out what to tell his baby sister.
“He looks normal.”
“Huh?” Tessa looked up at her brother, bewildered.
“Dad. He just looks normal. No tubes or monitors or anything. Just a nasty bruise on one side of his head.”
“Oh. I wasn’t really sure what to expect. How…how did this happen exactly?”
“He said he doesn’t really remember, but he hit his head pretty good, so, I guess that’s to be expected. Gina said he left about 20 minutes before her at the end of the day yesterday. She found him laying in the parking lot. She figures he tripped over one of the cement curb blocks and because of the stack of books he was carrying he didn’t see it and went down hard. It doesn’t appear he put his hands out to brace himself for the fall. His head took the brunt of it, I think.”
“Mom said he has internal bleeding?”
“Yeah, I guess they’ve tried a few times, but the doctors can’t stop it. He’s basically just slowly bleeding to death.”
Tessa gasped and let out a sob. “Oh, Kev, he’s only 72. I always thought we’d have more time to… to fix this,” she waved her hand around the air. The tension in their family had been ongoing for the last several years, ever since the divorce and the re-marriage.
“Mommy!” Henry shouted as he ran down the hospital hallway.
“Shhh, inside voice please, Hen…and walking feet, remember what Daddy told you?”
“Oh, right. Sorry ‘bout that Mama. Hi Uncle Kevin. Can you lift me way up there too? Just like Nora? I wanna turn too!” Henry whined as he tugged on Kevin’s pant leg.
“Henry,” he stopped tugging at the tone of her voice.
“Sorry,” Tessa whispered to Kevin. “It’s after 3pm, we’re in the witching hour with the four of them. I don’t know how long they’ll last. I guess we’d better go in?” she nodded her head towards the door.
“Oh, I know exactly what you mean, Saam. Mine are the same. Hey, Scott!” Kevin waved as Scott joined them outside of the hospital room.
Scott smiled at Kevin, with Nora up on his shoulders and Henry hanging onto his pant leg. “Hey, yourself stranger. I haven’t seen you in a while. I see our kids have made themselves at home on you. How’s Michele? The kids?”
“They’re all good. I’d ask if you’ve been keeping busy, but that’s probably an understatement, eh?”
Scott chuckled. “Something like that. Are you ready Tess?” He placed a firm hand on her lower back. I’m here.
She nodded. Now or never.
Kevin pushed the door to their father’s room open. He ducked his body down a bit as he went through the door frame, mindful of his little niece’s head.
“Hey, Dad. Look who I found outside.”
Jim opened his eyes and looked at his daughter. “Tessa.”
“Hi Dad.” Her voice quivered as she got a good look at him.
It had been a few years since she’d seen him in person. He was older. Thinner. Ashen. This was not the man she remembered. This was not the man she ran to when she skinned her knee or the man she saw watching her from the audience during her ballet performances. This was not the man who travelled with her and Scott to skating competitions. This was not the man who cheered them on during their gold medal win in Vancouver and their silver medal heartbreak in Sochi.
This was a shell of that former man, one worn by time. A man hurting from the rift he caused. A man seeking forgiveness from the four small children he loved to take for ice cream on Sunday afternoons and play catch with in their backyard. A man wishing he had more time. A man hoping for resolution, before it was too late.
“Daddy? Are we all done?” Henry broke the silence, tugging on Scott’s hand.
Jim looked over at Scott. “Nice to see you, Scott. Who have you got with you there?”
Scott nodded his head, “Jim. This is your grandson, Henry. He’s six years old.”
“I’m actually six and a half.”
“Nice to meet you, Henry. You’re the spitting image of your father.”
“Mommy says it’s not nice to spit.”
Jim chuckled.
“May I sit up on your bed with you?”
“Henry, I don’t think—”
“It’s alright, Tessa.” Jim patted the empty space on the bed beside his legs and Henry climbed up.
“That’s my sister Eleanor. She’s three.” Henry pointed up to Kevin’s shoulders. “I’m waiting for my turn. Is it my turn yet Uncle Kevin?”
“Soon. Why don’t you introduce Grandpa to your brothers?”
“Okay,” he smiled at his uncle.
“I have twin brothers, their names are Corbin and Owen. People don’t know which one is which, but I know, because I’m their big brother. I’ll show you, they look different.”
Henry jumped down off the bed and walked over to Scott. He looked into the car seat, “That one is Owen. His nose is just like mine.” Henry reached up and gave his own nose a pinch.
“So that means the other one is Corbin. His hair is the same colour as Nora’s and he sucks his thumb. So you just gotta check if his thumb is wet or in his mouth. Then you know who he is. See? It’s in his mouth. That’s Corby.”
Jim nodded. “You’re quite the knowledgeable young man.”
“That’s because I’m six and a half and I go to school now.” Henry was quite pleased with himself. He loved having all of the attention on him, especially since the arrival of his brothers. They seemed to take up the bulk of his parents’ time lately so Henry had to work extra hard to get people to notice him.
“Oh, hi Uncle Casey! That’s my Uncle Casey. Do you know him?”
Tessa couldn’t hide her smile, despite the guilt she was feeling for having kept her father away from her children. Henry seemed quite taken with him, although he would chat with anyone or anything, just like Scott.
Jim nodded. “Yes, I do know him.”
“Hi Dad, Kev, Tess, Scott. I see you brought the zoo with you,” he motioned towards the kids. “You could have left them with Megan.”
Tessa shook her head. “That would have been too much on her.”
“Dad, how you doin’ old man? You got yourself into a fist fight yesterday, I hear.”
Jim laughed. “Not quite Case.”
“Uncle Kevy, I want down,” Nora’s tiny voice filled the room.
“Gosh that sound takes me back about 30 some years. Tessie, she’s got your tiny voice and adorable good looks.”
Tessa blushed slightly at the…compliment? She wasn’t sure. This all felt so awkward. She wished she had Henry’s confidence right now. Where is Henry? Tessa looked around the room. No Henry.
“Scott? Where’s Hen?”
“I’m under here!” Henry answered before Scott could open his mouth.
Tessa closed her eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. The last thing she needs right now is to be searching the entire University Hospital, looking for their runaway son.
Scott reached over and closed the door to the room. “Henry, Nora, come over here please. Daddy will put a movie on the ipad while the adults talk for a bit. Okay? Then we’ll go get some dinner.”
“A movie? Okay! I like movies!” Henry crawled out from under Jim’s bed.
Tessa shuddered at the amount of germs he probably just picked up from the hospital floor, and made a mental note to scrub him extra good at bath time.
Owen let out a howl, always the louder of the two boys, especially when he was hungry.
“Okay, Mama will take you out,” Tessa said as she walked over to his carseat.
Tessa looked over at Scott. “I’m just going to step out into the hallway and feed him.”
Scott knew this was all too much for Tessa. Too many people in one room. Too much emotion. Too much to process. She needed a few minutes to herself. “Take your time, babe.”
Tessa unbuckled Owen from his car seat and made a quick exit, pulling the door closed behind herself. She sat down on the chair in the hallway outside the room.
“Do you need a snack, Buddy?” Owen pawed at Tessa’s chest with his chubby hand.
“Alright, just hang on a sec.” She unclipped her nursing bra and let her son latch onto her.
Tessa could hear laughter coming from inside her Dad’s room. Her brothers had not been quite as estranged from their Dad. They were older when the divorce happened, already moved away from home and married. Tessa and Jordan had formed a tight bond with their mother. The three Virtue women were very close, mostly because of the separation and divorce her parents had gone through. The girls had helped hold their mother up during that rough patch.
Kate and Tessa were especially close, Tessa being the youngest, she held a special spot in Kate’s heart. Kate travelled with her for nearly all of the skating competitions before the ‘comeback’, and she even moved with Tessa to Canton, a few months after Tessa did. Kate had always been Tessa’s rock. Tessa needed her mother to help her get through this…and Scott.
Scott poked his head out the door to check on his wife. “Tessa? You okay?”
Tessa hadn’t realized she was sobbing. Loudly. She shook her head.
Scott was torn. Should he leave the two older kids in the room, watching the movie? What should he do with Corbin? His wife was distraught and needed him. He picked up the car seat. “Hen, Nor, stay here with your uncles. Daddy will be right outside, okay?”
“Yeah, Dad.” Henry mumbled without looking up from the ipad.
Scott put the car seat down on the floor and knelt beside Tessa. “Shhh, it’s okay sweetie, it’s okay. I’m here. Tessa, you have to breathe.”
Tessa was gasping for air between sobs. Owen was too hungry to care that his Mom was making a huge scene in a hospital hallway.
“Look at me, Tess. Deep breaths. In and out, okay?”
*
Once Tessa had regained her composure, and finished feeding both boys, Scott gave her a hug before they went back into the room.
“I’m proud of you, Tessa. You are a strong and amazing woman. You’ve got this. It isn’t going to be easy, but I’m here with you, and you have your Mom and Jordan and your brothers. We’ll all pull through together. One last time…for your Dad, okay?”
“Okay,” Tessa whispered.
*
“Tessa? Why don’t we take the kids for a walk, you and Scott can have some time with Dad?”
Tessa nodded. “Thanks, Casey.”
Scott and Tessa sat down on the chairs beside Jim’s bed. Scott grabbed Tessa’s hand and gave it a squeeze. I’m here.
“Tessie…I’ve had a lot of time to think over the last 24 hours. I want to tell you that I’m sorry. I know it’s not much, but it’s all I’ve got. I’m sorry for the pain I caused you, and your mother, and your siblings. I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry for the time we lost. I’m sorry for not walking you down the aisle on your wedding day. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to be one of the first to hold your babies. Gosh, they are all so beautiful. You and Scott look like you’re doing a fantastic job raising them. I’m proud of both of you in so many ways. Tessie, I’m just…I’m sorry.”
Scott and Tessa both had tears running down their faces.
“You hurt me, Dad.”
“I know, baby girl. I know I did. I’m sorry. I hope one day you can accept my apologies. I love you.”
Tessa nodded.
They sat in silence for a few moments. Tessa dug her nails into Scott’s hand. She accepted the tissue he passed to her. She wiped the tears from her eyes, but they returned.
Tessa reached forward and took her Dad’s hand. She looked up into his sad eyes. “Thank you. Thank you for the support you gave to me, to us,” she looked back at Scott and he nodded for her to continue. “We appreciate all that you contributed both emotionally and financially so that we could pursue our skating dreams. For that, we are eternally grateful. I do, and always will, love you. I accept your apology. I want to make the most of the time we have together. I’m sorry too, for pushing you away, and Denise. I haven’t exactly been friendly towards her. I’m sorry for that, and I will tell her later.”
“No need to apologize, Tessa. None of this was your fault.”
“But I felt it was. I felt my skating caused the separation between you and Mom. I know now that it didn’t, but at the time, I internalized it too much and blamed myself. I shut you out when you tried to explain things to me. I’m sorry, Dad.”
Jim squeezed his daughter’s hand. “Apology accepted. Thank you.”
Tessa stood up and wrapped her arms around her father’s neck. “I love you, Daddy.”
*
Jim hung on for five days after his fall. On the last night, he went to sleep and never woke up. His four children, Kate, and Denise were all by his side as he took his last breath.
“Good-bye, Daddy. I love you,” Tessa whispered.