Chapter Text
“Your Birdie is dating our Kid.”
Captain Cold slammed the newspaper down on the bar of the Iceberg lounge, backed by half of the rogues gallery. The action itself was somewhat violent, but, as always, the man was cool as ice. Seeing he had the attention of the room, most importantly Batman’s rogues, Snart, threw his hood back and sat on the bar stool.
Signaling Penguin calmly, he ordered, “Your coldest from the top shelf.” After a beat, he added, “Please.”
Catwoman stood gracefully from the booth she’d been sharing with Harley and her girlfriend Ivy to walk across the room and slide onto a stool next to Snart. Smiling slyly, she said, “Heard about that. It’s real awkward with Daddy Bats, but I hear he’s working on it.”
Pied Piper snorted. “He better be.”
“Freeze!” Snart stiffened, mentally running through the settings on his cold gun needed to warn someone, maybe through the loss of a few fingers, about getting his name wrong. But then Ivy continued, “I told you Robin was gay. Did you believe me? No! You blamed that failed heist on me and said my plants failed.” She sneered at Mr. Freeze. “You owe me a drink.”
“I’ll add it to your tab,” Penguin said dryly, addressing the wide eyed man as he waddled over to Ivy to top off her empty glass.
“Not to suggest we don’t love you Central city folks,” Catwoman drawled, effectively taking back the spotlight. Not that it ever really left her. “But it’s an awful dangerous trip to Gotham, and it draws a lot of attention, so I’m forced to ask, why are you here?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Mick growled, with his usual wide eyed stare, a top shelf whisky somehow already in his hand. “To tell you not to screw our speedster.”
Selina purred, “Protective, are you?”
“Like you’re not.” Cold took a long sip of the drink Penguin had handed to him. Ice cold, as was expected. “Word is you’re awful close with Batsy and by extension probably care an awful lot for that kid.”
Selina stared at him through narrowed eyes. She really did look like a cat stalking her prey. “Maybe.”
Harley, who had been dozing on her girlfriend before the Rogues came in and was still waking up, finally spoke. “So, you’re here to declare war on our baby cape if he hurts your baby cape?”
“Pretty much,” Mirror Master confirmed.
Batman’s rogues exchanged guarded looks. Selina was the one who responded, projecting her voice to the whole room but keeping her eyes glued to Snart. “Fair. Consider it mutual.”
After searching her eyes carefully for any sign of doubt, Snart nodded, already running through plans to defend Central City from the wrath of Gotham in case the kid screwed up. “That’s something I can drink to.”
Penguin quickly ensured everyone had a drink, deceptively fast despite his waddle. All the Rogues raised their glasses.
“May they be so busy sucking face they forget to check their security,” Cold toasted.
“May they have better luck in bed than they did covering up their relationship,” Selina added.
They drank.
“Wait! What ‘bout Mista J?” Harley asked setting down her glass loudly in alarm.
Snart had always preferred the cold, but the chill that fell over the room was anything but comfortable. Selina hissed, Ivy tightened the arm around her girlfriend protectively, Penguin froze in the act of cleaning a glass, Riddler seemed to actually shrink.
Harley leaned into her girlfriend’s touch, her eyes darting around the room as she considered the various Rogues. “He’s gonna try ta use the kid to drive Rob insane. It’s his thing.”
“We won’t let that happen,” Ivy said darkly.
Snart glanced at his rogues. “We won’t either. If the Joker fucks with our kid, he’s going down.”
“Believe me, there are no complaints here,” Selina said, “In fact, if you see him anywhere in Central, call us up. I’ll sharpen my claws and be there to help in 30 minutes tops.”
Snart raised an eyebrow at her. Reason told him that was impossible for a non speedster, but somehow, he didn’t doubt her.
“Where’s the clown now?” Mick asked.
“Arkham,” Penguin answered shortly. “He probably doesn’t know yet, but he will soon.”
Snart looked around the room gravely. “And we’ll be ready.”
A moment of steely solidarity passed in silence before Selina broke it. “So how’d you find out about the happy couple?”
Snart waved a hand towards the newspaper he’d slammed down when he’d first walked in that had gone completely ignored. “Mostly that.”
The front cover had a large, albeit slightly grainy, photo of Robin dipping Kid Flash, their lips locked in what was undoubtedly a passionate kiss. The headline read, “BOY WONDER STEALS KID FLASH’S HEART?”
Selina snorted. “I see. Mind if I keep this? Batsy probably already knows, but it’s so fun to tease.”
Shrugging, Snart replied nonchalantly, “Go ahead, I already got copies.”
It evolved from there into storytime centering around the heroes of the hour. Mostly the various things they’d done that hinted at their relationship and sexual orientation over the years.
Hours later Selina stood up to give one last toast before the Central City Rogues left to find sleeping arrangements until they were sober enough to get home.
“May we be in heaven before the devil notices we’re dead, and if we do end up in hell, may we steal a pitchfork on our way out.”
They drank one last time and Snart stood up to lead his Rogues away, only slightly tipsy on his feet.
Selina ran her hands over his jacket in the doorway as she said goodbye, but even drunk, he recognized the movements of a skilled thief.
“Wallet,” he said holding out his hand.
She beamed, handing it over. “Aw, you’re no fun.”
He wouldn’t notice the piece of paper she’d slipped into it until much later. He’d be surprised to find it had a phone number written on it. He wasn’t totally sure what to make of that except that Selina had been very serious about them teaming up if it became necessary.
The Bird and the Kid had more riding on their relationship than they knew. More protection as well.
They were going to be just fine.