Chapter Text
And here’s Johan’s initial reaction to meeting dear Freckle.
It had been a few months since Esther’s little foray into another dimension. She hadn’t told Joey about what she’d seen. He had to focus on becoming a better person, not figuring out how to access other dimensions. Things were…getting better. They weren’t perfect, but everyone was slowly healing. It was a process. More than anything, Esther was happy to have her brother back. She’d missed him so much, especially since their parents had died. She recognized that her brother wasn’t the little boy she’d once known, but she was still happy to have him back. Her children were still getting used to him, but Isaac definitely took to him better than Rachel.
At the moment, Joey and Esther were sitting on the couch in Esther’s home. Her husband, Robert, was out with the children getting groceries. This left Esther and Joey alone, allowing them to talk. They’d been avoiding actually talking for a while now. But after everything that had happened in the past year or so…They needed to talk.
“It’s good to have you back,” Esther said. They’d been sitting on the couch for nearly an hour now, avoiding looking at each other.
“Did you miss me?” Joey asked with a small smile.
“Of course. We all did.” She reached out and took his hand.
“Never seemed like you’d miss me,” Joey muttered bitterly. Esther sighed heavily, squeezing Joey’s hand.
“I know that’s how you felt. But Ma and Pa always loved you.” She said. “They were just worried about you. Animation wasn’t even an industry back when we were kids. And making a living as an artist has always been hard.”
“That’s…fair,” Joey admitted. “It just…” He paused, his lips twisting in irritation and frustration.
“I know. You felt like none of us believed in you.” Esther finished. “Believe me, I know.” Joey hunched his shoulders at the memory of the confrontation the two of them had had in his office the day Esther had visited.
“You don’t have to say it like that.” He grumbled.
“You said it enough times to Ma and Pa that I heard about it.”
“I didn’t say it that much.”
“Sure.”
“Come on, you’re making me sound like a brat!”
“You were a brat.” Esther folded her arms.
“Well, you were always a stuck up know it all!” Joey fired back.
“You take that back!” Esther demanded, jumping to her feet.
“Make me!” Joey yelled, doing the same.
This resulted in the two of them screaming at each other, all the built-up tension exploding as they yelled out all their feelings. Although, most of their insults were more than a little petty. They hadn’t seen each other properly since they’d been kids, and it seemed their relationship hadn’t moved past that point.
“Your mustache is stupid!”
“At least I don’t have grey hairs!”
“Some of us didn’t get to have their age frozen in demonic ink for nearly 20 years!”
Suddenly, Joey stopped. He was staring at the window. The big bay window in the living room that overlooked the front lawn. Well, that normally overlooked the front lawn. Now, it was black. For a moment, Esther was confused. Then she followed his gaze.
“What on Earth?” She stepped away from her brother, getting up to go over to the window. She stood in front of it, seeing her disheveled reflection in the blackness. Tilting her head to the side, she reached out and touched it. Her fingers found only cold glass. She could see ones and zeroes in the darkness, standing out starkly in green. It was like…Like watching the code on a computer.
Suddenly, the surface began to ripple. Instinctively, Esther took a step back, just in time to see something, or someone, fall through.
“What the-?” Joey started to ask, only to be interrupted by Esther.
“Johan?”
Johan looked up from where he’d fallen flat on his face. His glasses were a bit askew, but for the most part, he looked fine.
“Erm, hello.” He managed to get to his feet. “I’m sorry to drop in on you like this so suddenly. But..well…It’s been a few days and I was worried and I-”
“Wait, wait.” Esther stopped him. “A few days?”
“Yes. It’s been a few days.” Johan repeated. “Why?”
“Johan, it’s been nearly two months.”
“Oh…” Johan’s face fell. “Well…I suppose…I guess time works differently when…Well, you know.”
“I’m still happy to see you.” She smiled and went in to hug him. Only to pass right through him. To her surprise, she saw ones and zeroes instead of a flesh and blood person. Joey shrieked, stumbling back as he saw his sister pass right through the other man. Esther pulled back with a frown.
“Sorry.” Johan smiled apologetically. “It’s a bit of a tradeoff. I can either have a physical form or sanity.”
“And you chose sanity.” She concluded. Johan nodded.
“Well, regardless, it’s good to see you.” Esther smiled softly. “I was worried about you.”
“Thank you.” Johan smiled shyly, a blush coloring his cheeks.
“Um, excuse me?” It was then that Joey’s voice reminded the two of them that they weren’t alone. Esther turned back to look at her brother. He was standing where she’d left him, eyes wide and mouth hanging open.
“Right.” Esther took a step back. “Jojo, this is Johan. Johan, this is my brother.”
“Don’t call me that in front of him!” Joey hissed. “Who is this guy?!”
“He’s you from a different dimension,” Esther said.
“Me from…” Joey blinked. Normally, he was the one telling people ridiculous things. It felt strange to be on the other side of it. He looked over at Johan again. His heart skipped a bit. Now that he gave the other man a proper look, he really was handsome.
“Hello.” Johan smiled shyly, raising one hand to wave. Joey felt the heat rising in his cheeks.
“Well, erm.” He cleared his throat. “I suppose the world is strange and unknowable sometimes.” He stuck his head out. “Joseph Drew, nice to meet you.”
“Johan Ramirez. It’s nice to meet you too.” He tried to shake Joey’s hand, but their hands passed through each other.
“Ah, right.” Joey smiled sheepishly, withdrawing his hand. “Sorry.”
“It’s alright, really,” Johan reassured him. Esther smiled to herself, hands on her hips. Johan glanced toward her, and she noticed the helpless look in his eyes.
“Is something wrong?” She asked.
“Oh, um, it’s nothing,” Johan said quickly, his cheeks turning a bit red.
“Johan.” Esther folded her arms, shifting into her patented ‘mom’ voice. Even grown men crumbled under her gaze. And so Johan did.
“It’s just…” His eyes flicked to Joey and he lowered his voice. “You didn’t tell me he’d be this handsome!”
“Pardon?” Esther looked at him blankly.
“Look at him!” Johan gestured to Joey. “He’s gorgeous!” Joey blushed, hunching his shoulders a bit.
“Truly, sir, you are too kind.”
“Him?” Esther pointed at her brother. “Him? You think he’s gorgeous?”
“Don’t sound so surprised!” Joey sputtered. “A lot of people find me handsome!” Esther kept staring blankly at Joey before turning back to Johan.
“Him?”
“Esther!”
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.” Esther laughed. “It’s just weird having people be attracted to my little brother. He’s still a dorky little kid in my head.” Joey glowered at her, eyes narrowed. But he had to salvage this somehow. Clearing his throat, he addressed Johan,
“So, you’re me from another dimension?”
“Oh! Yes.” Johan nodded.
“Then, did you…” Joey hesitated, finding the words difficult to say. Thankfully, he didn’t have to say anything. Johan’s face fell, his gaze dropping to the floor as his whole body seemed to deflate a bit.
“Yes. I did.”
“Ah.” Joey smiled wearily. “I’d sort of hoped other versions of me hadn’t made the same mistakes.”
“I’d hoped the same thing,” Johan admitted. “But, well, it seems like all of us go down the same path sooner or later.” Joey was quiet for a moment, staring at Johan with an unreadable expression on his face. He was handsome, Johan thought. Freckles dotted his skin like stars in the sky, dancing over the bridge of his nose, lingering in the hollow of his neck. His hair was black, but it wasn’t the deep blue-black that Johan saw in his own reflection. Joey’s hair was a dusty black, intermingled with hints of brown.
Johan could see the resemblance between this Joey and Esther. They had the same high cheekbones, the same strong nose. Both of their bodies were thin and willowy but belied a quiet sense of strength. Both siblings had lines around their mouths and eyes, lines that crinkled when they smiled and made them seem warm and approachable.
“MOM!” The quiet moment was interrupted by the front door opening and Esther’s children sprinting inside.
“Hey! Don’t run in the house!” Robert’s voice came from outside. Johan instinctively tensed up as the children came into the living room. Almost immediately upon seeing Johan, Rachel stopped in her tracks. Isaac ran into her, stumbling back.
“Why’d you…stop…” Isaac started to ask, before trailing off as he saw Johan. “…Um…Hi…?”
“Hello.” Johan waved nervously.
“Who’s he?” Rachel demanded, turning to her mother with her hands on her hips. She was an average looking child in nearly every way. Her hair was brown, her eyes were brown, she was neither thin nor fat, neither short nor tall. Her shirt and skirt were rumpled and her hair was in messy braids. But Johan couldn’t help but be a little intimidated by the look in her eyes. She was certainly a fierce one. But then again, she was 14 and felt she had something to prove.
“This is Johan, he’s a friend of mine,” Esther said, gesturing to Johan. “He just wanted to stop by and say hello.” Rachel narrowed her eyes at Johan. Behind her, Isaac peeked out curiously. He was smaller than his sister in height but considerably stockier. His hair was dark, similar to Joey’s, and it flopped over his big brown eyes.
“I like your glasses.” He said quietly. He looked rather fascinated by Johan.
“Oh, thank you.” Johan smiled at him.
“You’re really tall,” Rachel announced. Johan couldn’t help but laugh.
“Yes, I am.” He replied.
“Do you think he’s taller than Mr. Polk?” Isaac asked. “I didn’t think anyone was taller than Mr. Polk.”
“That’s true.” Rachel nodded solemnly.
“They know Norman?” Johan looked over at Esther and Joey.
“Of course we know Mr. Polk.” Rachel said before her mother or uncle could explain.
“We know everyone from the studio,” Isaac added. “Well, most everyone.”
“It’s kind of funny how many people around here are connected to the studio.” Rachel started to count on her fingers. “Mom’s Joey’s sister, Mr. Foster is Mr. Henry’s foster son, Miss Nancy is Mr. Lawrence’s sister, Mister Chris is Mr. Cohen’s cousin..” She kept counting on her fingers, listing off a bunch of different people in her life who were evidently connected to the studio.
“I tried to keep them away from it.” Esther’s gaze softened as she looked at her children. “I wanted to pay my reparations to Joey’s employees in secret.”
“But Rachel’s really nosy,” Isaac smirked behind his sister.
“I am not!” Rachel stamped her foot indignantly.
“Are too.”
“You wanted to know what Mom was hiding too!”
“What are you two yelling about?” Robert asked, entering the house with arms full of grocery bags. He was a rather nondescript looking man. Average height, a little stocky, grey-haired.
“Isaac called me nosy!” Rachel yelled, pointing at her brother.
“She is!” Isaac protested. Robert sighed, only to look up and see Johan. He frowned slightly, glancing at Esther.
“This is Johan. He’s a friend.” She explained.
“I see.” Robert nodded. He didn’t entirely understand who this man was, but he was pretty sure Johan was probably involved in some kind of dark magic.
“Kids, could you help me with the groceries?” He asked. “I think your mother and Uncle Joey want to talk to their friend by themselves.”
“But I want to know who he is!” Rachel protested.
“Sweetheart, you don’t need to know everything,” Esther said.
“I know that.” Rachel hunched her shoulders.
“Come on.” Robert gently dragged Rachel away, Isaac taking his free hand. Esther sighed heavily.
“She just doesn’t know when to quit.” She folded her arms, hunching her shoulders a bit. Joey pursed his lips, moving closer and putting an arm around her in an effort to comfort her.
“You’re afraid she’ll end up like him,” Johan said. Esther and Joey both looked abruptly up at Johan.
“Yes…How did you know that?” Esther asked.
“I mean, it’s not hard to figure out.” Johan smiled slightly apologetically. “A common thread among us Joey’s is the fact that most of us don’t know when to give up.”
“It’s true.” Joey echoed Johan’s sheepish smile.
“I suppose it is.” Esther conceded, her gaze drifting back toward the door. “I just don’t know what to do. She’s so singleminded. I’m afraid she won’t understand how dangerous her attitude is until it’s too late.”
“We’ll figure something out.” Joey tried to reassure her. Esther just sighed again, collapsing onto the couch and beginning to massage her temples.
“Should I…?” Johan pointed back to the window. “I…I don’t want to intrude.”
“I think she needs a little time, yeah.” Joey nodded, his attention on his sister. “It was nice meeting you, Johan.” He glanced back at the taller man, smiling softly. “I’d love to see you again. This, uh, might not be my house, but I say you’re welcome here anytime.”
“It is mine and I agree.” Esther murmured from the couch. “Come back anytime you like.”
“Thank you.” Johan’s smile was enough to make Joey’s heart skip a beat. The taller man nodded and turned to the window, giggling to himself before disappearing back into a line of code. Joey then returned to the couch to try and cheer up his sister.
A few hours later, Johan appeared once more. Joey and Esther were taking turns reading from a trashy romance novel Esther had bought years ago to cheer each other up. She’d bought it purely to have a reason to talk to Robert, not to actually read it, but it was still fun to drag out and read out loud every so often. Most romance novels Esther read were at least slightly well written and had premises that made sense. This one…well…It was a wonder it had gotten published in the first place.
“Stop! Stop!” Joey was howling as Esther read the sex scene. “This is awful! How the Hell was this published?!”
“Your guess is as good as mine.” Esther giggled, lowering the book. It felt good to be spending time with him like this. She’d missed him. Suddenly, there was a thud from the window. The siblings turned to find Johan falling to the floor again. Only this time, he looked absolutely distraught.
“Johan?” Esther put the book down. “What’s wrong?”
“I-I’m sorry.” Johan sobbed, still in a crumpled heap on the ground. “I’m so sorry. I couldn’t stay away. I-I tried but I w-wanted to s-see you again.”
“We just saw each other an hour ago.” Esther hurried over to kneel before him. “Johan, what happened?”
“N-No.” Johan looked up, revealing his tear-stained face. “It’s b-been a year and a-a half for me.” He sniffed loudly. “I-I’m sorry. I m-missed you both. I had t-to see you again.”
“Hey, it’s alright.” She tried to touch him again, but her hand went through him once more. This time, though, something was different. As her hand passed through his code, she suddenly saw…things. A Bendy cutout with terrifying eyes holding a sign saying, “Wandering is a terrible sin”. A Tommy gun.
“What the-?” She jerked her hand back.
“What’s wrong?” Joey got up from the couch as well. “What happened?”
“I just…” Esther trailed off, staring into the space where she’d seen the cutout.
“…It’s nothing.” She finally said, shaking her head and kneeling beside Johan. “Are you alright?” Johan just shook his head, his lip quivering.
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” Esther’s voice was gentle and comforting. “You don’t need to apologize for anything. You’re welcome here any time. We both told you that.”
“You’re not alone.” Joey knelt beside both of them as well. He’d been told that ever since he’d been forced to confront his actions. He wasn’t alone. He had to confront what he’d done, but he wasn’t alone in his road to redemption. So this Joey shouldn’t be either.
“Do you mean it?” Johan asked quietly.
“We do.” Esther and Joey said together. Johan stared tentatively at them for a moment or two before shakily smiling.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Esther reached out to touch his shoulder, but pulled back once she remembered.
“Sorry.” Johan managed to pull himself into a sitting position.
“You have nothing to apologize for,” Esther assured him. “Although, I am curious why we can’t touch you.”
“I’m a glitch.” Johan began to explain. “If bugged code touches another segment of code, that code will temporarily be erroneous until it is replaced where it should be.”
“I’m not sure I understand,” Esther admitted. She could work a computer, sure, but she didn’t understand the nature of coding. Joey just sort of frowned into the distance, mouth opening and closing as he tried to wrap his head around this.
“I…” Johan stopped talking, getting very still and looking past her.
“Johan?” Despite her better judgment, Esther reached out and put her hand on his shoulder. As expected, her hand passed through his body. But what she saw this time chilled her to her very core. Johan, covered in ink, in the form of the Ink Demon.
“Nevermind.” Johan cleared his throat and shook his head.
“Esther? Are you alright?” Joey asked, noticing Esther’s expression. Johan’s gaze was drawn to her as well, her face a mask of horror.
“What’s wrong?” His brow furrowed in concern.
“I…What was that?” She whispered.
“What are you talking about?” Joey grabbed her hand, trying to ground her.
“When I touched him before, I just saw a creepy cutout and a gun,” Esther said, staring at Johan. “That was…Oh, sweetheart.” She looked like she wanted to enfold him in her arms and just keep him there. “What on Earth happened? How did you become that demon?” Johan’s face went pale, or at least as pale as it could conceivably go.
“You…Saw it?” He asked slowly.
“I did?” Esther faltered a bit at his reaction. “Was I…not supposed to?” Johan scrambled back a bit, starting to rock back and forth as he mumbled to himself.
“No no no no. That’s not supposed to happen.” He murmured.
“Johan, it’s alright,” Esther said. “I was just startled. You don’t need to feel bad.”
“No one else is supposed to see it!” His gaze snapped up to her, eyes wide and frantic. “I did this to myself! No one else is supposed to share my burden!”
“It’s alright, really.” Esther insisted. “I only saw it for a minute. I’m fine!”
“It’s not alright!”
Joey was utterly lost by this point. Esther and Johan were arguing about something he hadn’t seen and didn’t understand and he was rather confused. So he edged back a little, especially after Johan abruptly went silent. The other man’s form was starting to glitch, and suddenly Esther and Joey could hear his voice in their minds.
“OH GOD THEY KNOis that a chickeARGH MY HEAD IS KILLIall around me are familSHUT UP SHUT UP SHUarscenic contains traces of acetone right, so i canUSELESS NOTHI-"
“What. The. Fuck?” Joey whispered.
“Johan, darling, you need to take a deep breath.” Esther tried to regain some kind of control of the situation. “I think you’re starting to lose control a little.” She didn’t get a verbal response, but she and Joey were assaulted by another wave of semi-coherent and completely nonsensical thought.
It took quite a bit to finally calm Johan down. But Esther was patient and Joey was pretty desensitized to crazy shit by this point.
“I’m sorry,” Johan mumbled once he’d calmed himself.
“It’s okay,” Esther said. “This is all a learning experience.” She smiled wearily. “I’m still glad you visited.”
“It’s interesting to meet another Joey.” Joey agreed. “Especially one as handsome as you.” He winked, leaning on his hand. Esther rolled her eyes and swatted at his shoulder. Johan stared blankly at him for a moment, then giggled, his face turning red.
“I-I should be going.” He got up, clearing his throat. “I’ve imposed on you for long enough.”
“Come back whenever you like, handsome~” Joey said in a sing-song voice.
“Jojo!”
“What? He’s into it!”
Johan quickly exited through the window, smiling to himself as he went.