Chapter Text
Spock entered the classroom, walking much slower than usual, there was some uncertainty in his entire demeanour, in his walking, his attitude. He feared looking up into the amphitheatre and discovering that Jim was not there. And why would he be there, after all?
“Good morning, cadets,” he said, sitting down and switching the consoles on. His mind was wandering, and he felt horrible, he would have cancelled this class but the mid-term exams were closing in and he could not do that. “Please select the score which is found at page 203 in the manual and let us look at it together. Even though this is contemporary music and it is considered ‘hard to digest’ by some musical critics, it is my opinion that…”
Spock continued to talk, aware only of the fact that the students followed his instructions as usual.
Jim was looking at him with love and with sadness, having realized that his feelings, which had overwhelmed him in the last few days – were not returned in the least. Yes, he loved Spock – son of Sarek – and it hurt like nothing had ever hurt in his entire life. And he was not even into men – or was he? He had never paid much attention to his own preferences – anything went – as they say – but now, as love grew, immense and shattering – he saw no one but him.
“It is disappointing to see that even now, as the exams are closing in, you are not doing your assignments. Who managed to listen and analyse the work by AnJoan Grey which I indicated to you during our last class?”
“I did,” Jim said, and their eyes met.
Spock remained silent for a moment. No matter what thoughts went through his mind at that point, nothing reflected on his face. He resumed talking, after a short hesitation, presenting the examination topics to the students and indicating what they had to learn.
“Your participation to the mid-term exam is obligatory, with two exceptions: that of cadet Montgomery Scott who is on medical leave, and that of cadet James Kirk, who is to resume the flight and space jump lessons, effective immediately, as per Admiral Pike’s orders, and therefore can no longer participate in this class after today.”
Jim did not know what to think or say anymore – not that he would have actually been able to say something during the class. At the end of it, however, he just wanted to storm out of the class – except people were crowding around Spock as usual and he could not advance fast enough, he felt like suffocating there.
He left.
Little chances he had now to even see him…
Space-jump – good thing he was being allowed to resume those – acceleration and gravity were very good things to help fill in the emptiness in one’s heart and the pain that ate away at you – just like a worm eats an apple.
Suddenly, a firm hand took a good grip of his arm and he was pulled away in another direction.
That touch –
“What the hell – Spock what the hell?!”
“Silence,” Spock ordered, pulling him in a nearby office and closing the door with a brusque gesture. Next, he pushed Jim against a wall and kissed him ferociously, pressing his body with his.
Jim could not even react at first, shocked to suddenly find himself in the arms of his loved one. Then, he wrapped his arms tightly around his neck and kissed back with hunger and despair – and then his mind restarted abruptly, and all the anger and hurt came back with a vengeance. He cupped his face and broke the kiss.
“What the hell are you doing, you infuriating elf!? Do you think you can just burst into my life and – kiss me??”
“Yes,” Spock said gravely, not letting him go.
“You just expelled me from the damn class!”
“You cannot continue to be my student.”
“And why is that??”
“Because I do not kiss my own students,” Spock said, his lips close to Jim’s once again.
“Let me guess: regulations!”
“Exactly.”
It seemed to be a very simple explanation, which momentarily short-circuited Jim’s brain. It was his turn to launch at Spock and devour his mouth hungrily, making him walk backwards and hit against a desk and then against the edge of a sofa. They fell together on the sofa, with Jim on top of Spock.
“Why – why did – why do you –“ Jim tried to speak but he barely could articulate any words, his thoughts were not even forming.
Spock rolled over, changing their positions – he was much stronger, of course, and Jim was not fighting him at all.
“You thought I rejected you, back at the hospital. But I was not. I was just rejecting my own feelings, which I had trouble dealing with. I will not let you go, James Kirk – I love you, and I want you to be mine.”
“Yours? Your… what, more exactly?” Jim asked, his heart pounding in his chest, feeling more scared than he had ever felt in his entire life.
“My mate.”
Jim grew still for a while, almost not breathing as his own mind was internalizing that answer and understanding it, the consequences, the short road they had travelled to reach there. He was not sure if he had to say something in return too – he had no idea what, in any case. He knew this: he had fallen in love with him, and if there was the slightest chance to be with him, he will take that chance, no matter what. To say no, it would mean to lose his own soul.
“I love you, Spock,” Jim said. It was what his heart had been saying the whole time ever since he had seen him – even if his own mind had said various other nonsense.
And then, their lips met again.
The ceremony was small, but very well organised by Sarek’s attendant. It was taking place at the Embassy and a small group of people had been invited. It was not because Sarek was in any way ashamed of his choice – but because Scotty was still fragile and his soul was severely shaking, not quite believing what was happening to him.
He was to be Sarek of Vulcan’s mate.
Sarek was just helping him dress in a beautiful ceremonial Vulcan robe. It had many ties and ribbons and Sarek insisted in doing it himself – not because his attendant wouldn’t have done a good job, but because he did not want other hands to touch Scotty.
“Why are we doing this?” Scotty asked.
“I have explained three times already, Little One.”
“But you will ruin your diplomatic career and plans and ambassadorial… things. I mean you are a king of some sort, no?”
“Yes,” Sarek replied calmly, lifting his chin so that he could tie the upper ribbons.
“You see? Why do you want to ruin your life with… someone like me?”
“I am not going to ruin anything. I do what I want.”
“I mean… if you want to just… sleep with me… I’ll… do it, you know? It is not necessary to do… all this.”
Sarek stopped what he was doing for a short moment and looked into his eyes severely.
“Mr. Scott, next time you say such nonsense, you will brusquely understand just how heavy my hand is. I am taking you to be my mate because I want to, not because I fancy sleeping with you, and I cannot do so outside a bond. I am Sarek of Vulcan; I can sleep with whomever I like at any given moment, no being has ever resisted me – and not because I forced them to, please do not misunderstand me here. However, I am committing to you because you, tiny and wonderful Human, gained my heart and it is yours to keep.”
Scotty felt tears fall on his cheeks – happy tears, like he had never experienced.
Taking advantage that his loved one had momentarily been rendered speechless, Sarek finished tying and adjusting his robe and took his hand. Without asking him anything else – like, if he was ready or something – he walked out the door holding his hand into his.
The group of people present stood up – Christopher Pike, Leonard McCoy who seemed to dislike everything, Janice Rand, Nyota Uhura and a few other cadets and professors – and last – but not least, Spock and Jim, holding hands and leaning on one another as if wanting to just melt into each other.
“Beloved friends,” Sarek began. A while ago, a painful and life-changing incident took place in my life. As you know, I am Vulcan and whatever I say must be taken literally. After having sprained my ankle and being brought to the hospital, I met a young Human who was instrumental in determining that I was in far more danger than I thought – and who helped save my life – although indirectly. For the direct and extraordinarily helpful action, I must thank Dr. Leonard McCoy, my son Spock and his – his friend, James Kirk.”
He took a short breath, looking at Spock.
“James Kirk is my mate,” Spock said loud and clear, making everyone turn towards him in astonishment.
Sarek smiled.
“Then this day is twice as happy than I thought. Have you given him a bond yet, my son?”
“Not yet. I wanted to acquire your blessing first.”
“Come closer, my children.”
Jim and Spock came close to Sarek and he turned towards them, still holding Scotty’s hand strongly in his own.
“James Kirk,” Sarek said. “Do you truly and wholeheartedly wish to become my son’s mate?”
“I do,” Jim said. He could not believe it either, he had just said… I do.
“And you, my son. Here in my presence, do you promise to take care of your chosen one, to cherish him and be truthful to him and to never again hide your true feelings for him?”
“I do, because I love him,” Spock said serenely.
“Then give him your bond, my son, and may your union be blessed.”
As Spock was carefully placing his fingers on Jim’s face and was starting the delicate process of creating the bond, Jim felt as if he was being embraced from within, with love and care and with grace… it was blissful in every way. It felt as if life was just beginning.
Sarek watched them silently, with a beautiful smile on his lips, and still holding Scotty’s hands. Jim and Spock had both closed their eyes; they had instinctively made one step closer to one another, drawn by the pure force of the bond which now united them, lost in the contemplation of their love.
“Your turn now, Little One. Are you ready to love Sarek of Vulcan until forever?”
“Yes,” Scotty said, looking at him with pure devotion.
“And do you promise not to throw me away when you will be tired of me, or when I will grow old?”
“I adore you. You are my entire life.”
Sarek did not need any other encouragement. He touched his face and his mind, ad their bond burst into existence with the speed of lightning, beautiful and bright. He had chosen Montgomery Scott. It was illogical, it was unbelievable to many. But it was right.
In the end, there was only love.