Chapter Text
“Time’s up! Everyone report to the park under the dome. Have your presents ready. I’ll be situated in the middle on my throne near the taco truck. Please be orderly. That is all, sweeties,” Aizen’s mellifluous voice said over a loudspeaker. The out-of-town guests wouldn’t be able to hear Pesquisa.
Menoly had been waiting by the doors for the dome to open. When it did, she took a spot where she could see everyone coming in. She didn’t want to miss her chance.
Loly was one of the first entering the cornucopia. She spent the entire night doing her makeup, hair and choosing a dress, so she was ready to go and get the heart of the owner of hers. She ran to the center and looked for the throne.
Alas, she was too short to spot it right away. Menoly saw her fist. “Um… Loly, we’ve known each other for a long time, and you are my closest friend. So now that we’re having Valentine’s day, I’d like to present you with my h--”
“Did you spot Aizen-sama? I can’t find him. For a reason the people of Hueco Mundo are too tall.” Loly interrupted the message of her friend while jumping around to find him.
Menoly’s face fell. “He’s somewhere in the middle, but as I was trying to say, I’d like to present you with my hear--”
“Oh shit, the emo boy is here already, we need to see what bullshit happens to him now.” Once again Menoly was interrupted, but this time Loly grabbed the hand of her companion and ran towards a bush close to the fourth espada.
Menoly blushed and crouched down beside Loly, who was craning her neck to listen to the married couple. “This is for you, I made it because--”
“I love you Ulquiorra, happy Valentine’s day!” Orihime said with a wide grin, passing him a box.
“I am infinitely fond of you as well, Wife. Thank you,” he responded, looking at the box with caution.
“Fuck, this was more boring than I expected.” Loly said after hitting the bush they were concealed by, “I’m sorry Menoly, you tried to say something” the woman with pigtails asked her blonde partner in crime.
“Here,” Menoly said, her face defeated as she shoved a heart-shaped box into Loly’s hands.
“Oh, thank you. You are always a great companion, I was too busy with my look to make chocolates for Aizen-sama.” Loly grabbed the box and put it inside her bag.
Menoly sighed, rolling her eyes. “Aizen said he was near the taco truck; that might be easier to find,” she said, leading the way through the crowd. She had spotted said truck and was about to point it out when Loly pulled her in another direction.
This time they stopped in the branches of a tree, accompanied by the birds living close to them. They were over the the first espada, Starrk, and the human, Tatsuki. Lillynette was nowhere to be seen, so it was the perfect moment for this couple to connect. “Menoly take your phone out, this is the perfect opportunity for some drama,” Loly whispered close to Menoly’s ear.
The blonde did as directed and waited.
“Tatsuki-san?” Starrk asked, rolling over onto his side on a blanket and yawning. “Thanks for the chocolate. I’ll have some but please have some too and share with Lily. It was very kind,” he said, dipping his fingers inside and putting a piece of the sweet into his mouth. He hummed in appreciation and closed his eyes, instantly rolling back onto his back and appearing to fall asleep.
“It was nothing, dude… Starrk-san, you saved me at Hime’s wedding.” Tatsuki replied before grabbing a chocolate for herself and tasting how the final results were. She was a bit nervous since she never has done it before, but after tasting them, she realized how good Orihime’s recipe was and relaxed. “Who is Lily?” She asked curiously.
“You know, my soul daughter? The one you’ve been hanging out with the last few days?” he mumbled. “I gotta tell ya, Tatsuki, having you here has been a blessing. You’re independent, you are social, you keep Lily out of my hair sometimes so I can get some decent rest, you’re easy on the eyes, and you don’t snuggle too hard. I wouldn’t mind making this a permanent thing, if you’re interested.”
“Right, my bad. Lily is a good girl,” after that Tatsuki remained quiet while chewing the chocolate and moved her face away while her cheeks were bright pink.
Luckily for her, the only response she received was a loud snore. She wouldn’t have to answer him until sometime after his nap.
Tatsuki sighed and lifted her face to look for Lily, but it was too crowded to find someone as small as her. When she was about to stand up, someone fell right from the tree, and yelled “Can I have chocolate since the boomer is asleep?” Lilynette who was now sitting in the blanket was grabbing her head in pain.
Menoly shut her phone off. “I think that’s enough, should we keep moving?” she asked her love interest.
“Perfect, I see Ggio, that sneaky bastard must have something big.” Loly jumped with sonido from the tree and went to another place to hide.
Menoly followed afterward, not bothering to put her phone away. It was a good idea, too, because they managed to arrive just as Ggio was reciting a poem to Hallibel.
“Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you. A million and one Gillians died to make you, and I promise as long as you’ll have me, to your heart I’ll be true,” he said with a smirk and bowed, being applauded by Tier’s fracciones.
Hallibel let out a small chuckle, she covered her smile with her slender hands, her eyes were closed and her cheeks brightened, “thank you, Ggio” she said calmly, after that she went looking in her purse and took out a small, heart shaped box. “Uhm… for being such a good friend to me these past two months or so… I… made you some chocolate. It's not very good, so you don’t have to eat it.”
“I’ll be the judge of that, my sweet,” Ggio replied, still feeling roguish. He opened the box and gasped. “These are absolutely beautiful! Am I really supposed to eat it? But of course, such beautiful hands would craft such a delicacy,” he said, placing a chocolate into his mouth.
He closed his eyes.
He moaned obscenely .
His eyes opened and he blushed at Tier. “I think you ought to try this before you speak poorly of it,” he said, leaving the box on his spot and crawling across the blanket to Tier.
Tier’s light pink cheeks turned into a crimson red, and her gaze went to the right and without looking at her partner’s. She answered “I suppose I’ll try them later.”
Because she had looked away, she was not aware of how close Ggio had come. He raised a hand to the side of her face and gently directed it back to his. He looked at her with unguarded affection as he shook his head, although his eyes had a hungry glint to them. “I think you should try them right now,” he murmured, closing the distance between them and catching her lips between his, letting the flavor of the chocolate he had just eaten coat the inner surface.
Tier was hypnotized by the kiss for a few seconds, letting her heart beat rise and her eyes close while she enjoyed the experience of kissing someone she liked. But before Ggio could gently leave her lips, she realized what just happened, back down, covered her face with her right hand and said, “uhm, they taste good.”
Ggio chuckled and slung an arm over her shoulder, so they could face her facciones, and started to chat to take the pressure off of Tier. Once she seemed to have relaxed a bit, he leaned into her ear a bit and whispered, “Happy Valentine’s day, Tier. Want to be my girlfriend?”
Her heart was pounding, her body was shaken and her face was burning. She thought they were only good friends, but apparently Ggio loves her? Confusion was running all over her brain, she backed up a bit, and tried to answer something, but mumbles were the only thing that came out of her mouth.
Ggio smiled at her gently. “You can answer whenever you’re ready. I can wait forever,” he said quietly. “Let’s have fun today!” he said, keeping the cheer going. He had known her long enough now to have expected this kind of reaction from her. He thought it was cute, despite mild disappointment.
“That was so cute, holy shit, I want to vomit” Loly said to Menoly, they were hiding behind a bench to watch the romance between Ggio and the third espada, but now that they were moving too fast for her taste, she looked for another couple to spy.
Menoly could only agree. She followed the brunette until both of them spotted the taco truck. “It must be around here!" Menoly shouted, but then pulled Loly out of the way quickly as Barragan barreled through the area where they had been standing.
“BARBARA! MY DEAR BARBARA! WHERE ARE YOU!?” He bellowed, before continuing on his quest.
“Fucking hell, Boomer, fuck off and look to the people in front of you!” Loly screamed in anger.
Menoly, still having a grasp on Loly’s arm, pulled her to the Taco Truck. “Come on, listen! They’re at it again!” Menoly hissed, caught up in the glee of all the gossip fodder they were capturing. She saw Ichigo trying desperately to fill a tortilla while Nel clung to his side and Grimmjow argued with her.
“Itsyugo took my chocolate, it means he is mine, dumb kitty” Nel said with her cheeks inflated and directed a mocking look at Grimmjow.
“You can’t have him, he is min--” Grimmjow covered his mouth before ending the phrase and then corrected himself “He is my opponent, he can’t be distracted with bs like love.”
“Guys, guys, there is plenty of fight and tacos to go around! Chill out! I will try your chocolate when I have a break, Nel!”
“Try it no---” Before Nel could finish the sentence she was scared by an angry Dordoni shouting “¡Niña, vayase por favor, está arruinando mi negocio!” Nelliel jumped out of the truck and pushed Grimmjow with her.
“You guys! I know you both love Ichigo very much. We all do. But we have a business to run, here! We’re closing before the dance, so come back then!” Chad scolded the obnoxious pair of arrancar in an uncharacteristic move.
“I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t because of how Nel treats Ichigo,” Grimmjow dropped a small “tch”, and left the place.
“But after this we have to go on a date, is in the rules, Itsyugo,” Nelliel replied to the workers of the taco truck.
Before anyone could respond, Orihime breezed through like she didn’t have a care in the world, carrying a bag. She pulled out a small box with each person’s name on it. “And here’s one for you, Grimmjow, and you, Nel, and you, Sado-kun, and you, Dordoni-san, and…” here she blushed a bit, “here’s one for you, Kurosaki-kun,” she said after handing out her obligation chocolate to everyone.
“Um, thanks, Inoue,” Ichigo said with a blush after Chad gave her a thumbs-up.
“Thanks,” Grimmjow received the chocolate from Orihime, Nel, on the other hand, before she could say anything, had 5 chocolates inside her mouth, so she just nodded in the direction of the princess.
“Muchas Gracias,” Dordoni said before bowing to her.
“De nada,” Orihime said with a huge grin. “I hope you like them! Let me see, I only have Yammy and Aizen-sama left,” she said to herself, tapping on her lower lip. “Do you see them anywhere?”
“I don’t know about Yammy, gatita, but Aizen is on his throne angrily waiting for unos chocolates,” Dordoni pointed where Aizen was and continued with his business.”
Ichigo’s eyes snapped to his boss’s. “YOU SPEAK ENGLISH!?”
Orihime found her way to Aizen’s throne and gave him his chocolate, which he thanked her for petulantly. He hadn’t received any from anyone else. “Orihime, I know you’re a married woman, but you’re the only one who has given me anything so if it should come down to it, I’m going to go over your husband’s head and take you on a date. That’s if no one else gets to me before the deadline. I hope you understand,” he said in a mopey voice.
Orihime grimaced and looked around. Ulquiorra had been complaining to her in private about how Aizen overstepped his boundaries with them all the time. He would not be pleased if this happened the way Aizen said. Then, she saw her; the answer to her prayers. “Momo! Momo, come look who it is!” Orihime cried out to the petite shinigami.
Momo smiled back and came running towards them, “Hi Orihime,” she bowed to her and immediately stopped paying attention to her, “Captain Aizen, I have been looking for you all day.”
Aizen’s sad face slowly rose into a devilish grin. “Momo-chan, how long has it been?” he purred.
“Around four years, Captain Aizen,” Momo blushed and from her uniform she took a small bag with chocolates. Momo extended her hands and said “These are for you, Captain Aizen.”
Just then, Menoly and Loly broke through the crowd. “Oh, shit,” Menoly swore as she saw Aizen swoop that little shinigami into his lap.
“Aiiiiiizen-saaaaaaaaama,” Loly shouted while running towards the direction of Aizen, she was confident that he would chose her over that dumb shinigami so she ran with her arms open, eyes closed and fantizising about an Aizen waiting her like a prince.
“Loly, watch out!” her friend shouted, but it was too late. Yammy had knocked over a lamp post to get to Orihime and collect his obligation chocolate, and Loly tripped over it, sailing right past Aizen’s chair and into a prickly rose bush behind him. Nevermind the fact that Menoly could have warned her much sooner, but deep down, she didn’t want Loly giving away the chocolate she had made.
The bell started sounding and the time for chocolates was over. Now all the couples who received chocolate had to get together and come to Tosen's stand to get the location of their date. Tossen appeared on the right side of Aizen and gave him a list with all of the couples that would go on a date today, Aizen grabbed it and used the pesquisa to announce them, “Ulquiorra and Orihime, Ggio and Hallibel, Mila Rosa and Appaci, Barbara and Nnoitra, Grimmjow, Nelliel and Ichigo, Tatsuki and Starrk, Aizen and Momo, Gin and Rangiku, Menoly and Loly, and the ones I missed, go to Tossen’s stand to learn where you will pass your lovely evening.”
Orihime sighed in relief as she returned to her husband, but her happiness didn’t last long. She looked down at the box of chocolate she had made for him to see that he had not even opened it yet. “What the hell, Ulquiorra? I made this for you and you won’t even try it?”
Whoa, she seemed sensitive. “I just want to save it until after our date. You know how, um, sweets make me sleepy,” he replied, totally pulling the excuse out of his ass.
Orihime crossed her arms over her chest and threw her chin up. "So where are we supposed to go for this “date” anyway?” she asked in a snotty voice.
“I do not know. I’ll ask Tosen,” Ulquiorra replied, tuning into Pesquisa and asking.
“Ulquiorra-san, it is up to luck. Come here and you will get the date location,” Tosen answered instantly.
“I’ll be back. Have a seat and relax, Woman,” he said, walking over to Tosen.
He ran into Grimmjow on the way. “What is this all about? I don’t recall this date activity being discussed at the briefing,” he said.
“I don’t know dude, was one of the changes added when we included shinigamis. Ask Aizen if you care.” Grimmjow shrugged his shoulders and continued walking.
“You’re in a foul mood, Sexta,” Ulquiorra commented as they made their way to Tosen’s podium.
“Dude, I have a weird ass triple date and Aizen has been bothering me everyday with the Twitch shit.”
“That? He’s still doing that? I told Orihime to refuse him if he asks her to be a prop next time”
“Yeah, he finally left my room though, so I can sleep again.” Grimmjow yawned.
They got into line and waited as Yammy stomped away, yelling, “I don’t want no date with Zommari! He’s such a poindexter!”
“Better get a date next time, big man,” Grimmjow sarcastically answered.
Coming from behind the guys, Zommari appeared with his arms crossed and complained, “It is not like I want to be with you too Yammy, you eat too much.”
“You talk too much,” Yammy complained back, pushing the other Espada along.
When all couples arrived there, Tosen explained how it would be decided, “Every person will grab a paper from this box that will have an ideal location for a date, according to Sarah Peterson from Buzzfeed. When you get one you go there and enjoy the evening until 9.” Tosen coughed after no noise was made when he finished speaking and asked “Understood?”
Aizen grunted and stuck his hand in the box, pulling out a piece of paper and unfolding it without reading it. “This paper say’s Grimmjow’s room, doing a livestream. Let’s go, Momo,” he said with a smile before leading her away.
“There is no such location, Aizen-sama. Please go where the paper really says.” Tossen scolded his boss.
Aizen used flash step and got out of there before Tosen could pick up the piece of paper he dropped.
The blind man sighed and said “Well, next one, but if you disobey you will suffer bigger consequences than Aizen-sama.” The next couple was Zommari and Yammy, they got a piece of paper and celebrated when they saw that it said Arcade. Then it was the turn of Ulquiorra and Orihime.
“What location did you get? Ulquiorra.”
“It says, Cat Cafe. What is the meaning of this?”
“It's a cafe, where cats go around and you can play with them. Something else?” Tosen replied with his monotone voice.
“Please,” he said, putting his hand back into the box, only to get pushed aside by Wonderweiss, who pulled out some paper and held it to Lillynette.
“YES! Laser tag!” Lillynette cheered, turning with the mute boy and running out of the room.
“I would prefer laser tag,” Ulquiorra said to Tosen.
“Better luck next year.”
Ulquiorra tsked and returned to his bride, whose mood was greatly improved.
“Your turn, Grimmjow,” Ichigo said.
“I know, be right back,” Grimmjow approached the table, put his hand in the box and took the piece of paper to read out loud, “follow cupid?? What does that even mean?”
“Oh I see you got the special paper. Ishida, come here!” Tosen said, and Uryu came wearing a diaper, fake wings and holding his Quincy’s bow.
Ishida groaned. “This is so degrading. Follow me, you’re in for a special valentine’s treat,” he said unenthusiastically.”
Nelliel jumped onto Ichigo’s back and said “Isn’t it nice, Itsyugo? We get a special date because we are a special couple. Now follow the Quincy.”
“You know I come with you two too,” Grimmjow said angrily with his fist already in the air.
“Oh right, dumb kitty.”
“Come on, you two, be nice,” Ichigo complained, shrugging Nel off of his back. “Can you please walk on your own, Nel? You’re too big to carry around in this form.”
“You don’t like when I press them against your back?” Nell asked while looking at her breasts.
Ichigo blushed, but cringed. “It’s heavy, Nel, was his only response as he stared at her huge boobs.
“Ichigo!” A familiar voice shouted.
“Rukia?!” Ichigo shouted back as he looked around for his long lost friend.
“Right here, dimwit,” She replied, slapping him across the back of the head. “Is Inoue around?”
Ichigo rubbed the injured spot and said, “Yeah, she’s going to a cat cafe with—“
Rukia’s eyes had lit up at the mention of a cat cafe and she was gone in a flash.
Ichigo rubbed his eyes and said, “So where are we going, Ishida?”
“Just follow me,” he said, taking off after Rukia. “Tonight you three will witness the miracle of love and romance,” he announced in a bored voice.
“Next in line,” Tosen said after cupid and the trio went away.
Next was Ggio and Tier. “Ladies’ choice,” Ggio said, standing aside.
“Thank you,” Tier stepped forward and grabbed one location, when she opened the paper she read to Ggio “The amusement park,” Hallibel looked confused and asked his partner “what’s that?”
Ggio shrugged. “I don’t know. Let’s find out.”
“Okay,” the third espada said before grabbing Ggio and using sonido to leave the park.
“Come on, people, this magical date isn’t going to start itself,” Ishida said, pointing his arrow at Grimmjow. “First stop, the hall of losers, Menoly and Loly’s sad coffee shop date,” he said, bursting through the open garganta that would be up all night for these dates.
“Why are we going the-” Grimmjow was asking before Nelliel grabbed him and Ichigo by their arms and jumped through the garganta screaming with excitement, “Let’s gooo!!””
The group arrived outside of a coffee shop in Karakura town and went inside. “Now, remember, nobody here can see you three, so behave. I have to buy the coffee for those two because no one can see them, either. You sit at a nearby table and try to blend in, and let me know if anything romantic goes on,” Ishida said.
“Are you going to buy us coffee too? Ury… Cupid-san,” Nell asked meanwhile the other 2 of the group were searching for a free table.
“Even better!” Ishida said, pointing to a stack of clear plastic cups near a water dispenser. “I bought you guys all the water you can drink! Go ahead and get glasses for everyone.”
Nelliel’s expression of happiness dropped, her brows, eyes and mouth flattened and her arms were balancing like they were dead weight, “Uhh, so our surprise date only includes water.”
“Yeah, you’re going to need it, too,” Ishida said as he walked to the register. “This date is going to be action-packed. You’ll need to be hydrated.”
“I see…” Nelliel sighed and served herself some water to then sit besides Ichigo. “Itsyugoo, I’m bored,” the green haired woman rested her head on her partner’s shoulder and waited for him to do something interesting while taking small sips of the fresh water.
“Wow, free water?” Ichigo said in an unimpressed tone as he shrugged Nelliel’s head off of his shoulder and focused on Grimmjow. “Why do we care about some lame date between those two?” he asked, pointing at Loly and Menoly.
“I don’t fucking know, entertainment? Being honest, I don’t even know why I am here? I didn’t give you chocolate.” Grimmjow answered while checking his nails.
“Yeah, I guess Orihime’s chocolate counts and we got added to the dating pool that way,” he replied before stretching his arms out over his head. “This is boring. I’d much rather draw swords against you, Grimmjow,” he growled, looking at the blue-haired Espada through the corner of his glowing amber eyes.
“Dumb ass,” Grimmjow replied while parting his blue eyes away from Ichigo's. He drank some water and used the cup to hide his bright pink cheeks, forgetting that the cups were transparent.
Nelliel hit Ichigo in the stomach and said “I gave you the chocolates, you have to be nice to me, Itsyugo, not good.”
Ichigo winced and grabbed his stomach, then inhaled sharply. That hurt! “Damn it, Nel! Sorry! I forgot, Orihime gave me hers right after you.”
The former third espada grabbed Ichigo’s head and put it close to her chest, “This is your punishment, Itsyugo, now stay here,” the woman brushed the orange hair of his and while looking at Grimmjow, sticking her tongue out in mocking fashion.
Ishida returned to the table at that time and scoffed. “Really, Kurosaki? You’re just going to fall into the closest pair of tits available? Classy,” he snarked, and then picked up a glass of water.
“Are you not supposed to help those 2 girls with the coffee, Quincy?” Grimmjow growled in anger.
“No, not really. Let’s just observe,” he muttered.
“Loly, please listen to me, Aizen would never sleep with that little shinigami. She’s so small and mousy and not beautiful and strong like you.”
“But Aizen-sama doesn’t like cows, so he must like girls way under his age. I bet that bitch is going to try something dirty with him.” Loly rested her head in the palm of her hand.
“Even if she does, so what? It’s not like she’s going to stay in Las Noches. Those shinigami are all going back home at the end of the night. Now come on, try a chocolate. I made these for you , Loly,” Menoly said, looking at her with significance.
“Ughhh, I can’t stand the idea of Aizen-sama going on a date with someone who isn’t me,” Loly’s elbow slid across the table, leaving her chin resting on the wood. With her hand she took a chocolate and put it in her mouth, and a few seconds after swallowing it she said “It tastes good, thank you.”
Menoly blushed at the compliment and said, “I know how you feel. I can’t stand the idea of you going on a date with someone who isn’t me.”
“Eh, what do you mean?” Loly lifted her head and looked at her companion directly to the eyes.
Menoly stared at her for a long moment before leaning in to kiss her. It was just a tiny peck on the lips. “I mean I love you.”
Loly backed down; her face was red and she was taken by surprise. She tried to look away from Menoly, but every time she tried, her eyes were redirected to the lips of who just kissed hers. Stuttering, she answered “WAIT, wait, wait, wait, wait a bit, Menoly, I like you, but I didn’t knew you liked me this way, is kinda weird thinking about it, you know?”
Menoly cringed hard and spoke through a fake grin with clenched teeth. “Uh huh. I just wanted to tell you, it being Valentine’s day and all…” she trailed off.
“Well, that escalated quickly,” Ishida said, standing up and aiming his arrow at Nel. “Time to release Kurosaki. Our next stop is laser tag.”
“Why was laser tag an option? Are we twelve?” Grimmjow mocked the Quincy dressed as cupid.
“Shut up, Grimm; laser tag is awesome and you’ve never even played. I’m going to kick your ass,” Ichigo said, taking a step closer with every word until he was nose to nose with him.
“So you think you can beat me, you bastard? I’ll destroy you,” Grimmjow pushed his forehead against Kurosaki’s and looked him directly into the eyes. A few seconds of tension passed between those two looking at each other, but all was interrupted by Nelliel who pushed the faces of the both of them with her hands and with a confident grin and eyes closed, she said “both of you are going to lose against me, kitty and Itsyugo.”
Both the males scoffed, and Ishida scoffed louder. “Nope, that’s it, we’ve screwed around too long here. No laser tag. We’re moving on to the cat cafe.”
Nel jumped to Ishida and hugged his legs, tears running all over herself, and said “Noooooo, please I want to play laser tag with Itsyugo and the kitty boy,” She stayed there looking at him with her big teary eyes.
“Nope, let’s go,” he said, leading the way using hirenkyaku as the others followed along with flash step and sonido until they arrived at a pastel colored building. Immediately, the Quincy started sneezing.
“I fucking hate this,” he muttered to himself before opening the door.
“I hate you,” Nelliel replied, still angry about not going to the laser tags.
Once they entered, they could feel Ulquiorra’s strong spiritual pressure filling the cafe. Obviously the fourth espada was displeased by something. The group turned a corner to see him seated at a table, with a tabby using the horn on his helmet as a scratching post and a calico curled around the back of his neck like a mink stole. On his lap was a huge black persian cat that was leaving its long black hair all over his uniform. Orihime was aahing and oohing about all of them, completely entranced by the perfect image of cuteness, until she felt her friends’ spiritual pressure.
“Oh! Ishida-kun! Kurosaki-kun! Grimm-chan! Nel! Come and join us! Doesn’t Ulquiorra look adorable?!?”
“He, I see that I’m not the one having the worst time,” Grimmjow chuckled, after seeing the disaster that was happening around Ulquiorra.
Green eyes slid towards Grimmjow’s and Ulquiorra snarled. “I thought you were supposed to have an affinity towards these beasts, Pantera. Would you mind instructing them to leave my person?”
“Yeah, is really easy to do that, but you will have to ask it nicely, murciélago.”
Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “Pretty pretty please with sugar on top?” he said in a monotone way.
Grimmjow looked at him confused for a few seconds and then said “You just needed to say please, dude.”
“It must be the cuteness of the decor that is rubbing off on him,” Orihime said with a huge smile as she looked around. The place was decorated like it was a cupcake kingdom.
Ichigo and Nelliel chuckled at what the princess said. Grimmjow got close to Ulquiorra and with one movement of hand, all the cats around the fourth espada dispersed, “you’re welcome.”
Ulquiorra shivered. “Thank you. Now if you wouldn’t mind accompanying my Wife while I go wash the filth off of my hands from coming into contact with those creatures, I would appreciate it. I extend this invitation to you only, Sexta,” he said with a warning glance to the other three.
“As you say” Grimmjow shrugged his shoulders.
Ulquiorra waited until Grimmjow took his seat to begin looking for the bathroom, and while he did, the complaints started. “How come I can’t sit there?” Ichigo whined first.
Ulquiorra slowly moved his eyes to the shinigami. “Are you serious? Are you kidding me? Mr. Five Lifetimes of Love wants to know why I don’t want him sitting next to my wife?”
“No need to worry, little bat, Itsyugo is faithful to me,” Nelliel hanged her arms over Ichigo’s neck and pressed her chest towards him, “right, Itsyugo?” She asked with her mouth close to his ear.
Ulquiorra’s brows raised at the display and he almost laughed. He might have before Ishida said, “And what is so offensive about me?”
“You’re wearing a diaper,” was the only reply before Ulquiorra spotted the bathroom and left.
“I suppose it's you and me, Hime,” Grimmjow said, taking a sip of the water cup he had.
“Oh, then since you’re my new date, why don’t you try a bite of my parfait?” Orihime teased, but still held out a spoon full of ice cream and syrup and cookie bits on it towards him.
Grimmjow moved his head closer to the spoon and covered the spoon with his mouth to eat the sweet, he then leaned back and said “tastes good, I wish I took the cat cafe paper.”
Ichigo, Ishida, and Nel’s eyes widened with open, disgusted mouths. “Ewwww…” Ichigo complained.
“Indirect kiss!” Nel stammered, “Ulquiorra is gonna be so mad!”
“Maybe we should go…” Ishida said quietly.
“What are you even talking about? I just ate a bit of what she gave me.” Grimmjow said, without understanding the situation.
He followed Ichigo’s eyes after he heard the man whine. He was staring at Orihime’s mouth as she pulled the spoon out of her mouth very, very slowly. It looked obscene. “See?” the shinigami squeaked.
“What?” Orihime asked innocently, a bit of ice cream still pooled on her lower lip.
“... I’m still clueless about what you are talking about,” Grimmjow answered, looking at the trio of disgusted people.
“What are you talking about?” Ulquiorra’s deep voice was soft behind them.
“Oh, Orihime just kissed Grimmjow,” Nel replied flippantly, looking at her nails.
Ulquiorra’s finger raised toward the Arrancar seated beside Orihime as he began charging a cero.
“Wait!!! I didn’t kiss her, calm down,” Grimmjow shouted, putting his hands in the air and the palms facing the angry husband.
Ulquiorra’s cero remained crackling in a static ball at the tip of his finger, causing cats to hiss and scatter around the cafe. “Explain yourself, Trash.”
“Dude, I have no fucking clue but we didn’t kiss, right Orihime?” The blue haired man looked at the girl eating, asking for mercy.
Orihime shook her head, looking at Ulquiorra innocently. “No, I gave him a bite of my ice cream and Nel and Ichigo thought about perverted things.”
Ulquiorra’s hand lowered and he turned toward Nel, narrowing his eyes in disapproval, then turned his attention to Ichigo. “Perverted thoughts about my wife? Do I need to kill you again ?”
Ichigo was an idiot. He laughed. “Yeah, we all know how well that turned out for you last time.”
“You’re fucking dead,” Ulquiorra growled.
“It’s time to go!” Ishida said with a nervous grin, grabbing Ichigo and basically warping out of the cafe, letting Grimmjow and Nel fend for themselves.
“Well, it was nice to see you, Hime-chan,” Nelliel nervously spoke while walking backwards until opening a garganta and leaving Grimmjow alone, the feline didn’t take too much time to realize that he was alone and jumped with Nelliel.
“Bye bye!” Orihime called after them.
When the pair of Arrancars caught up with Ichigo and Uryu, they were panting on the outskirts of an amusement park. “He didn’t follow you, did he?” Ichigo asked.
“Of course not, he has better things to do than chasing after you, dumbass,” Grimmjow replied to Ichigo putting his face close to his, “what was your plan? Fight Him?”
“No, I didn’t have a plan,” Ichigo admitted.
“I’ll fucking kill you one day.” Grimmjow threatened Ichigo, grabbing his shirt by the collar and lifting him a few centimeters.
“Whoa, cool it, Action,” Ichigo said, his breath ghosting over Grimmjow’s face. “You’ll get your chance,” he said softly, as the tips of his ears turned red.
Grimmjow’s face brightened pink in shame, he weakened his grip and let the shinigami go. “Why you have to make everything so erotic? Fuck you,” Pantera shouted at him, and covered the red of his face with the white of his outfit.
“I do not!” Ichigo denied loudly. “Why are we here, Ishida?”
“Tier Hallibel and Ggio Vega are having their turn at romance here. Let’s go watch,” he said, leading the way into the park.
“Look there,” he said, pointing his arrow at Ggio, who was passing a huge thing of cotton candy to the tall woman. “Pure romance.”
“Itsyugoo, I want one too,” Nell grabbed Ichigo’s sleeve and looked at him with her cheeks inflated.
“Go get one, then, I don’t care,” Ichigo said, scowling at her.
“But you are my date, Itsyugo.”
“I dunno how it is where you’re from, lady, but where I’m from, the older one pays. You’re way older than me. Besides, this isn’t a real date and I don’t get paid in real money. I get paid in tacos.”
Nelliel’s eyes brightened as tears came out of them, she hugged Ichigo putting her head in his chest and cried “why are you so mean, Itsyugo? You give Grimmjow what he wants but don’t do it to me.”
“What do I give him, Nel? Please tell me.”
“Love.”
Ichigo groaned and stomped in the direction Ggio and Tier were walking. “I’m getting on that thing. If you want to sit with me, you can,” he relented to Nel’s demands as he approached the Ferris Wheel.
“I love you, Ichigo,” Nell jumped overwhelmed in emotion, she hugged the shinigami’s arm and gave him a kiss in the cheeks.
As it turned out, the Ferris Wheel was full except for one car, which Ishida, dressed as cupid, appeared to take alone. His face was almost purple, he was so embarrassed. “I hope you people appreciate this!” he whined as the three invisible people stepped into the car.
“Thank you so much, Uryu-chan,” Nelliel answered without even looking at the ridiculous looking men. Grimmjow sighed while sitting close to Ishida. “Why am I here?” He mumbled to himself, looking at the other cars.
“I ask myself that question everytime I see any of you,” Uryu grumbled, chin lodged in his palm as he looked outside the care with baleful eyes.
“Hey, guys… Listen,” Ichigo suggested, looking at the car ahead of them.
Inside, Ggio was sidling up beside Tier. “So… About my question before, I just want to say again that I don’t need your answer right away. I enjoy all of my time with you, Tier.”
Tier gazed away from Vega, looking at the sunset behind them. “I also enjoy my time with you, Ggio,” she replied, leaning her body closer to him despite the lack of eye contact.
He smiled and draped an arm over her shoulder. “Good. Please, I know you are a quiet person, but if you ever have any thoughts on your mind or in your heart that you want to tell me, do not hesitate. I am here for you,” he said.
In the car behind, Ishida snickered. “He’s laying it on a little thick, don’t you think?”
“As long as he gets the job done,” Grimmjow said to Ishida, “the dude seems to have everything under control so let’s keep watching,” the arrancar yawned and extended his arms, waiting for something interesting to happen with the couple.
“Ggio… I don’t know if I should tell you this, because I’m not actually sure if it’s true or not,” Hallibel cheeped. The blonde woman turned towards him, making the distance between their faces only a few inches, her breath was heavy and her chest was about to explode, but with all the clarity of the world she asked “are you sure you want to hear it?”
“Yes, tell me anything; everything,” he breathed.
“I think I love you, Ggio Vega,” Tier declared her love to him, her head was feeling light, her heart was pounding and she was shaking, but she remained there, looking directly into his eyes.
His eyes dropped to her lips for a moment and returned to her eyes. “I love you, too, Tier Hallibel,” he said, letting his forehead touch hers, breathing her breath. If she wanted to do more, she would have to initiate it. He didn’t want to ruin this for her.
Tier waited a few seconds for Ggio’s kiss to come with her eyes closed but it didn’t come, so she took the initiative and pressed her lips against his and kissed him. She retrieved her head afterwards and asked him “Are we lovers now?”
“I would like that. Do you agree?”
“Yes, I do.”
With that, Ggio swung a leg over her lap, cupped her face with both hands, and returned the kiss she had given him with enthusiasm.
In the car behind them, Ichigo was rolling his eyes. “I don’t get it. I just don’t get it. They’re not even doing anything interesting. How can they just talk about nothing and then make out?”
Ishida rolled his eyes. “I knew this evening of “observing the miracle of romance” would be completely lost on you.”
“Itsyugo, let’s do the same, you’ll understand it then,” Nell suggested it to Ichigo and lifted her chin, closed her eyes and pressed her lips waiting for him.
Ichigo pulled back. “Let’s uh, not rush things, Nel,” he said, putting his hands on her shoulders and pushing back.
“Can we go already, Ishida?” Grimmjow interrupted the scene, impatient to leave this place.
“Yeah, let’s go. I’m ready to be done. You guys don’t care if we skip everyone else, right?”
“No,” the 3 of them answered Ishida’s question at the same time.
He sighed. “Fine, who do you want to see next?”
“Who else is left?” Grimmjow asked.
“Uhh, you can pick Yammy and Zommari, Tatsuki and Starrk, or the three Fracciones.”
“Let’s go for Starrk, I’m curious.” Nell answered.
“Okay… where are they…” Ishida opened up his phone to check. “Okay, apparently they went to a romantic dinner at a place called “The Rose Garden”, which is neither a garden nor does it serve roses. It’s a fancy French restaurant so behave,” he said, opening the door of the Ferris Wheel car midair and stepping out. “Follow me.”
Nell, grabbed both men’s arms and followed Ishida’s directions. “Let’s go!” the arrancar yelled in excitement, leaving the touchy couple in front of them behind.
When they arrived, they were greeted with soft pop ballads and the sounds of silverware clinking on fine china. “They’re over there,” Ishida whispered, sneaking among the shadows, trying not to be seen in his ridiculous costume.
“Why are you hiding Uryu-chan?” She asked with her tilted to the side.
“Because I’m nearly nude! This is not appropriate clothing for this establishment. If I am seen, I’ll get kicked out,” he hissed.
“There is no way you can make yourself invisible? Quincies are kinda trash,” Grimmjow said.
“Screw you,” he replied, stopping and hiding behind a long drapery near the couple. “Now, I’ll stay here until you are ready to go home. Behave,” he warned.
Ichigo snickered and stood shoulder to shoulder with Grimmjow, then murmured, “I never thought Tatsuki would be into older guys. I guess you never know about people.”
“I thought Starrk was into Tier, but I was clearly wrong about it.” The blue haired man replied, leaning his shoulder against the shinigami’s.
They were quiet after that and were able to see Starrk nod off from time to time. He was really struggling to stay awake in this quiet, dim, intimate atmosphere.
“Starrk!” Tatsuki said just loud enough to get his attention. “Hurry and finish up. This food is good but this place is boring,” she said before shoving a juicy piece of beef into her mouth.
“Right, I’ll finish as soon as possible,” Starrk answered, but the speed he was eating the food didn’t go up a bit.
Tatsuki sighed. “So, I was thinking about what you said at the chocolate thing. I wouldn’t mind staying in Hueco Mundo for a while to see how it goes,” she said as she chewed on her food.
“We’ll be glad to have you as company in the first tower, but Lily can get a bit noisy at times, hope you don’t mind that,” Starrk smiled and took a sip of his wine after that.
“No worries, I’m pretty noisy sometimes too,” she said, burping softly and then taking another huge bite of food. “I’m not exactly ladylike.”
Starrk chuckled after hearing the burp and answered, “you will be a perfect match for Hueco Mundo then,” Starrk continued eating his steak.
“So…” Tatsuki began, unsure of the nature of their new arrangement. “What do you think? Are we friends? Roommates? Something else? You don’t seem very invested in any particular scenario.”
“Is up to you to decide that, I enjoy going with the flow of things. Pressuring for any of the options would make things feel unnatural between us.”
“Okay, but hypothetically, if I wanted to, would you want to have sex?” she asked, just putting it out there.
“As long as you want to, of course.”
“Hee hee! Tatsuki is gonna get some,” Ichigo said, laughing in an immature way.
Grimmjow turned his eyes to Ichigo and asked him “Are you twelve?”
“Twenty, but close. How old are you? A thousand?”
“Maybe, I do not keep count of time. I’m old enough to beat the shit out of you, though.”
“In your dreams,” Ichigo purred into his ear.
“Stop being like that, idiot,” Grimmjow stepped away from Ichigo in embarrassament.
“Like what?” Ichigo retorted, scowling at Grimmjow.
“It doesn’t matter anymore, I wanna go,” Sexta ignored his feeling towards Ichigo and went looking for the Quincy hiding in the shadows.
Ichigo turned to Nel and elbowed her arm. “Do you have any idea what he’s talking about?”
Nelliel shrugged her shoulders and replied “nope, he has been weird lately, Itsyugo.”
He raised his brows and shrugged. “I guess we’re done here.”
“Ishida!!! Where are you??” Grimmjow kept shouting.
“Here!” he whisper-shouted.
“Dude, I can’t see you, you better bring your Quincy ass here before I destroy the entire restaurant with a cero.” The man with blue hair shouted angrily, searching under the tables for the Quincy, but having zero success at it.
Ishida emerged from behind the curtain, struggling as he tried to free his fake wings that had gotten stuck in the drapery, cursing and huffing as quietly as he could. “I’m right here!”
Grimmjow, seeing how pathetic Uryu looked at the moment, fell to the floor and bursted out loud, laughing his ass off.
“Jerk,” Uryu muttered once he was free.
“I’m sorry,” Grimmjow squeaked in the middle of the laughter, after a few more seconds he stood up and whipped the tears from his eyes, “oh fuck that was gold, what a shame the other 2 missed it.”
“We’re right here,” Ichigo said. “Let’s go.”
“Good timing. I just got a message from Tosen that there is one more encounter to see, but it’s in Hueco Mundo. Let’s get back through that Garganta!”
“As you say cupid,” Grimmjow opened a garganta and was the first to pass, “if you stay too much time there someone will see you, Uryu,” he shouted without looking back at them.