Chapter Text
“It’s been over twenty-five years,” Uncle Jack said, “You’d think they would’ve given up by now. It just goes to show how serious these people are.”
“That’s why we should be trying to engage the FBI,” Edgeworth said.
Edgeworth was sitting in the middle of the back seat with his arms crossed and an expression that was enough to make any witness cough up on the stand.
Eww, not like… Never mind.
Phoenix looked back at him from the front passenger seat, “Come on! You saw how that guy reacted to us!”
“He’s just the liaison for this district, I can get a hold of the Chief down at the LA Field Office,” Edgeworth said.
“Look boys,” Uncle Jack said, “It’s a little late for if and who or but. These people are holding your cousins right now. You give me the disks, I’ll take you home, and go after your cousins.”
“How come we have to go home?” Phoenix said.
“Because you’re a lawyer and I’m a prosecutor,” Edgeworth said.
“Well, yeah but—“
“No,” Uncle Jack said, “Miles is right, neither of you have the training or experience to handle this.”
“Very good,” Edgeworth said and pulled the disks out of his pocket to hand to Uncle Jack. Phoenix attacked his arm.
“No!” Phoenix said, “We’re not going to hand over top secret whatevers to the terrorists.”
“You don’t even know if they’re top secret,” Edgeworth said.
“He’s right, kiddo,” Uncle Jack said, “You’re not even allowed to know that.”
“Wait,” Phoenix said, “You mean we aren’t even allowed to know how classified these disks are?”
“That’s it,” Uncle Jack said.
“They might just be personal files for all we know,” Edgeworth said, “Like, pictures or—“
“Porno,” Uncle Jack said.
Edgeworth glared at him, “Yes, well, I was going to say personal documents, but okay.”
“Wait!” Phoenix said, “You mean our cousins are being held in exchange for what might possibly be junk?”
“Yep,” Uncle Jack said, “And some girl dressed up like Wonder Woman.”
“You don’t mean Franziska,” Edgeworth said.
“Do you think anyone is coming for us?” Suzie asked.
“I hope so,” Jess said.
“Shh!” Connie said.
“They’re quiet out there.”
“Edgeworth! Really?” Phoenix shouted.
“We’re wasting time,” Uncle Jack said.
Edgeworth stood firm (sitting in the back seat of course), “I don’t want to leave my car out there all night.”
“But! All of them, Connie, Suzie, Millie, Jess, Sora and even Marlow—“ Phoenix began.
“I don’t know any of those people,” Edgeworth said, “And now that we’ve solved the mystery of why Miles Edgeworth got shot at a storage compound and dragged to the docks, I think I’d rather go home and make it an early night.”
“We haven’t solved—“ Phoenix argued.
“It’s solved enough for me!” Edgeworth said, “Everything was fine and I was reasonably in control, until this whole biological family thing happened. I’m sorry, I think I was better off when I was an orphan.”
No one spoke for several minutes. Then Uncle Jack turned the car around.
“Jack,” Zoya said on the phone, “Any updates?”
“We’re working on it,” Uncle Jack said.
“Bradley is freaking out.”
“That guy is an asshole,” Uncle Jack said.
“Tell me about it,” Phoenix said.
“That put us back about twelve minutes,” Uncle Jack said.
“Will we make it on time?” Phoenix asked.
“I think so,” Uncle Jack said.
“Wait, when did we get a time limit?”
“Gumshoe, I messaged the address, did you get it?”
“Yes, sir!”
“I’ll meet you there in about twenty minutes?”
“Will do, sir!”
“And bring that thing.”
“What thing?”
“The doohickie that you said you could turn both ways… It made the little ducky noises.”
“Oh, right. Sure thing Mister Edgeworth.”
The door roared as it was opened and the intense light that burst into the enclosure blinded the lot of them.
A silhouette stepped across the light making it flash off and then on again.
“You’re all children,” a cold female voice said.
She stepped across the light again and then moved in closer so that they could see her. She was a slinky blonde with her hair pulled back to fit into the black watch cap she wore. She glared at the group waving a submachine gun at them.
She laughed.
“Seriously? This is so cliché,” Marlow muttered under his breath.
“You!” She said and pointed at Marlow, “Bring him here. “
Marlow was grabbed roughly by a pair of guards and brought in front of the woman.
“You feel like talking?” She said, “Are you going to vouch for all of these kids?”
Marlow stared unable to speak.
“Answer my question!”
“Which one?” Marlow asked.
“Don’t get mouthy with me,” she said and for good measure the two guards holding him shook him up.
“Ah… Okay,” Marlow said, “So all those guys, they’re my cousins. We were coming back from a family reunion and—“
“Why did you stop at that storage shed?”
“I don’t know, I wasn’t driving,” Marlow said.
“I can’t see anything,” Phoenix said.
“Shh…” Uncle Jack said, “Just stay back. Go stand by the car.”
“But I’m not going to let you go in there by yourself!”
“Nick,” Uncle Jack said, “You’ll only get in the way.”
“It’s my fault they’re in there!” Phoenix said, “I can’t just wait by the car…”
Uncle Jack sighed and then nodded his acquiescence, “Fine. Stay behind me and keep up.”
The docks were silent except for some loading operations with a crane two piers over. Phoenix recognized the building as they approached. It was where they’d found Edgeworth a few days ago.
Uncle Jack motioned toward a window in one corner of the building, then he moved suddenly and he was under it. Phoenix swallowed.
He felt like a klutz as he swished through some tall grass and ran across the gravel to stand behind Uncle Jack.
Both of them froze when they heard the sound of a car engine idling.
Out of nowhere at least two-dozen vehicles turned on their lights and moved in on the building. Two helicopters appeared overhead shining lights into the vicinity from overhead. The place was lit up like a Christmas tree.
“This vicinity is now under the strict authority of Interpol. Nobody is to enter or exit the facility without proper credentials.”
“Shit,” Uncle Jack said.
“What about—?”
Uncle Jack gave him a dark look.
“Shit,” Phoenix said.
“Edgeworth!”
Phoenix pounded on the door to Edgeworth’s flat for what felt like ages before the butler let him in.
“Mister Edgeworth is indisposed at the moment,” the butler said, “He did say you were allowed into the flat. Please sir, what business do you have with Mister Edgeworth?”
“This is important. Can’t wait,” Phoenix said and eyed the smart dressed butler, “Your Excellency.”
The butler sniffed, “This way Mister Wright.”
Phoenix’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head.
This guy knows my name.
The butler led Phoenix through the luxurious apartment. He’d poked his nose in once or twice, but had never seen all of it. He caught his mouth hanging open at least twice.
In a bright, well-lit room, the Butler asked him to wait, while he spoke to Edgeworth.
“You may see him on the veranda,” the butler said when he’d returned.
Then, as suddenly as he had appeared, he was gone.
When Phoenix stepped outside his jaw dropped.
Edgeworth didn’t even look up from where he was launching golf balls into the grounds below.
“What do you want, Wright?”
“How come you never let me crash here?”
Edgeworth paused mid-drive and glared.
Phoenix went to join him on the small patch of artificial turf where Edgeworth had his tee set up.
“Are you wondering about last night?”
“Yeah, what the heck, Edgeworth! Uncle Jack told you not to call the FBI.”
“That wasn’t the FBI,” Edgeworth said, “That was Interpol.”
Phoenix stared.
“I figured out the night we had dinner with him that that old man was crazy.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Uncle Zeus,” Edgeworth paused to set up another ball, “All of that stuff about international spies and Dad hiding out. I don’t know how much of that was true.”
“But Mom,” Phoenix said, “She was the one that wanted me to get a hold of you.”
“Oh,” Edgeworth said, “That’s because we’re twins.”
Edgeworth squatted so he could estimate the trajectory of his shot.
“Not-Jilly is a Borginian Smuggler. Her name is… Ack, I can’t even say it,” Edgeworth stood, lined up, and took his shot.
“Nice,” Phoenix said, “But aren’t you afraid of hitting the neighbors?”
Edgeworth waved out at the grounds, “What neighbors?”
“Oh, heh,” Phoenix said, “We should all just move in with you.”
Edgeworth gave him a dirty look.
“There’s one thing I still don’t understand,” Phoenix said.
“Oh, I’m sure there’s more than one thing,” Edgeworth countered.
Phoenix didn’t notice.
“How come we were separated?”
“They separated,” Edgeworth said.
“Who?”
“Mom and Dad,” Miles said, “Dad was busy a lot so I stayed with Aunt Mildred—his sister. When he and Mom wanted to try and work things out, he moved out to the suburbs. But then, you know…”
“Who the heck is Aunt Mildred,” Phoenix said.
“You never heard Mom talk about your rich Aunt Mildred?” Edgeworth said, “Do you think I can afford this on a government salary?”
“How come I never got any money?”
“Who do you think paid for your education? Or should I say experimentation?”
Edgeworth waved for Phoenix to follow him. He led him deeper into the veranda and sat on a wicker divan with palm tree upholstery. Phoenix sat next to him.
Edgeworth opened up his organizer that had been sitting on the table where he last left it.
“Here is the hierarchy of the smuggling ring,” Edgeworth said, “We didn’t find out about Not-Jilly until the whole shooting thing.”
“So what about all the lights and helicopters that showed up last night?”
Edgeworth tapped his chin and smirked, “That must’ve been Lang.”
“Do you know what happened to our cousins?”
“What cousins?”
“The ones we were supposed to rescue?”
“Oh, Lang was supposed to take care of that too.”
A man with a teenage boy, two tween girls, a teenage girl and a young woman in a Wonder Woman costume waited at a bus stop.