Chapter Text
Purple hues faded slowly into the bathroom window as the morning sun rose. It was definitively autumn by this point in the year,the leaves well and truly off the trees leaving them stark.
Aaron let the steam of the small bathroom envelope him as he soaked in the bath. He was appreciating the time before everyone woke up and the pub springed into action. Most days he couldn't get a foot in the bathroom without Chas hogging all the space.
So it was nice to have the time to himself, without spanx and make up wipes strewn everywhere.
Maybe Aaron was also trying to escape his thoughts and his phone and contemplating drowning himself because of one text
One text
One fucking text
One stupid fucking text
Aaron definitely hadn't obsessed over it.
It was fine,cool,chill as some would say.
So no,he definitely hadn't obsessed over it.
Still, Robert had never text him before or in the two weeks after,they only had each others numbers because of Vic,so a simple one word text from him may have caused an absolute breakdown in Aaron
But it was chill
Cool
Completely and utterly 110% fine.
Which is why he'd been avoiding Robert every time he was so much as mentioned.
Not really an easy job when the bastard was fucking everywhere
College,the pub,the cafe,the farm, fine maybe not their seen as it was his house
Aaron didn't realize just how hard avoiding Robert Sugden was until he actively tried it.
It didn't help that Vic was his best mate and Robert just happened to be her brother
If the nagging texts were anything to go by it was pretty clear that she was getting sick of Aaron's game of hide and seek. As if by telepathy or magic the distinctive buzz of his blackberry from down the hall alerted him to the ever present fact that he couldn't ignore her forever
Reluctantly he pulled himself from the warmth and prepared to get his ear chewed off.
A string of apologies later and Aaron and Vic were sat outside of pound bakery sharing a weak coffee between them
"This is shit" Aaron stated matter of factly, because he was right it was shit.
The coffee was shit
The weather was shit
The thought of going to college was shit
"Well we could have gone to Starbucks" Vic took the cup and took a small sip and made a face, agreeing her friend
"What and pay a fiver for some poncy ice" Aaron scoffed "I don't think so. Besides,I'm on a budget"
Vic rolled her eyes "I'm not a mug Aaron,so don't take me for one"
"What?" Innocence wasn't a good look on him
"On a budget" Vic mimicked his voice, putting air quotes around the words. "I know you have a stash of money in your bottom draw and I know exactly where it comes from, we've been mates for years I'm not daft" she gave him a pensive look as if to say I'm not angry, just disappointed.
Aaron sighed. His exploits where not something he talked about with Vic,but he had never explicitly kept them from her,it was what it was and that was that
He went to speak before being cut off
"I'm not gonna lecture you,you don't need it" she looked up from the now lukewarm coffee nestled between her hands,an understanding in her eyes
She was there through every late night A&E trip and the countless chidings from Chas. She'd waited outside for him as his phone was searched through and he was given strict instructions on where he could go and who he could speak to. She knew what he'd gone through with it all before and she knew the toll it had on him
"I don't like it,and the thought of you mixed up in all that,but if you're safe then It's not my business. Just promise me you'll be careful" he smiled at her in response,a simple answer that meant I'll try
"Right come on, don't wanna be late" Vic stood up,patting Aaron's arm and threw the empty cup in the bin
Engineering is a nightmare and Aaron isn't too sure why he picked it. Not like he really needs it but it's whatever
He wants to be anywhere but the damp classroom
Staring absent-mindedly into the wall doesn't do him any favours, just lands him a scolding from the teacher who's name he may have forgotten, for not listening.
Aaron feels the beady eyes of his classmates and if he could be arsed he'd tell them to piss off
But he can't
Be arsed, that is. So instead he crouches in his seat and pretends he doesn't exist for the next 45 minutes
Aaron was still trying to live down the shame the incident two weeks prior.
That's what he'd resorted to calling it,the incident, because he was still embarrassed and ridiculously over dramatic
Vic and Adam had reassured him it was no big deal,if anything Adam had been happy because the look on Roberts face was priceless, he'd sat replaying the video over and over again, going hysterical each time Roberts eyes bulged out of their sockets,much to Aaron's contempt
Ross Barton had made gagging noises for a week as if they were 12
And Robert. Radio silence
One text
'Sorry'
Sorry for what Aaron thought? Calling you a fucking freak or sorry for breaking nose my and making you chuck all over my Nike's.
Sorry for existing?
Aaron didn't know
He didn't have the bottle to reply. So he'd ran away like a little boy and pretended nothing had happened
It was easier that way, meant he could just forget everything, Robert, Katie,Chrissie.
Didn't do a very good job of it though
Robert was like a curse he couldn't break. Just lingering there. Prick
And okay maybe he did want to smack him but he also just missed him
He'd never admit it of course. So instead he existed and Robert existed but not together
never together
---
Mid October meant huddling under a concrete beam in the disused section of college trying to stay warm
Aaron twiddle with the cig in his fingers. He promised Paddy he'd quit. He promised Paddy a lot of things
He lit it, cradling the flame away from the harsh wind
It was a free period and Adam was chatting bollocks about the way Vic's hair blew in the wind
"Alright Kates" Aaron vaugley remembered the poet's they'd studied at GCSE
"Who the fuck is Kates" It was the first time Adam had said anything that didn't include Vic
"That poet innit" He dragged on his cig
"Keats" The smarmy git had disappeared as suddenly as he'd arrived, sauntering past with his leather jacket
Robert
Of course he knew,of fucking course he knew and of course Aaron had been wrong and embarrassed himself all over again.
Robert probably read them out to Chrissie or something, like a twat
Words got trapped in Aaron's throat for the millionth time in that boys presence.
One text
Hadn't seen him for weeks
And then simply a name
Keats
"Vic I'm not sure coming to yours is a good idea" she was dragging him off the bus and straight up to the farm, Aaron's protests firmly ignored
"Aaron, Robert really doesn't care that you-"
"I know" Aaron but in,he was tired of hearing about it
Yes he still wanted to avoid Robert but he also wanted to avoid everyone else who festered there
Jack ,Andy ,Katie
Fucking Katie
Aaron wasn't sure if they were still carrying on.
He hoped not. He hadn't seen the two of them near eachother since that night at the club. Maybe, just maybe it was a one off
Not like it mattered however,even if Katie wasn't in the picture Chrissie White most definitely was. God Aaron despised seeing them together,she clung to him like a bad stench, glaring at every girl who dared to even glance at Robert
There was a smugness to Chrissie that Aaron couldn't quite place. You could never quite tell if she pitied you for being poor or hated you for not being rich. She was far too vague. With someone like Katie or Tanya you knew if they were judging you and you knew why. There wasn't much depth. Chrissie was different.
Perhaps that's why Robert liked her, because she had some sense of character,even if it were cruel
Either that or her dad's Austin Healey
The farm was as empty as ever. Jack was off chopping wood somewhere,Andy and Katie were in town and Robert was well,Robert
Crisp air meant Aaron making sweater paws for his red hands. Outside the dead leaves were beginning to crunch even more as the frost set over. It wasn't even winter yet,but Yorkshire could feel it fast approaching
Bleak weather made for steaming mugs of tea, almost scolding as Aaron wrapped his hand around the large mug in an attempt to steal it's heat.
So him and Vic were alone. That was nice. She'd been preoccupied with Adam and he'd been avoiding her so she'd insisted on having a 'girly chat'.
"Sorry for being with Adam all time' it was a sheepish and unnecessary apology but Aaron accepted anyway
"It's alright. I'm glad you're happy"
She smiled
"So"
"So"
"I don't know, feels like I haven't seen you in ages" there was a sincerity in her voice
Aaron reassured her it was okay,that he understood
"Not like I've been blowing up your phone is it" that was one way of putting it
A few simple apologies,updates on how absolutely boring college was and two cups of tea later and they'd agreed to play FIFA for a bit before Aaron had go help his mum with something
He was absolutely smashing Vic at FIFA whilst simultaneously devouring a pop tart when the front door went.
He'd frozen, controller in one hand and pop tart in the other.
Robert's hair was golden and windswept when he'd whipped round the corner and up the stairs
Aaron had physically felt his heart drop to his stomach and begin churning
"He's also doing that, doesn't even bother saying hello" Vic sighed "Oh my god I'm beating you!" She exclaimed, this was a rare occurrence for her
The brief appearance of Robert had completely thrown Aaron off, and as the match ended,Aaron had somehow lost to Vic,a first
Robert really did have a hold over him
Like the devil himself, Robert suddenly appeared infront of them
He had changed,now sweatpants
Sweatpants. Robert. Sweatpants.
Aaron never thought he'd see the day
His face was still red from the cold,his hair was flat against his head.
He sunk into the chair next to the couch and began flicking through his phone
Aaron tried desperately to tear his eyes away but he just couldn't. This was a comfortable,soft, domestic Robert in front of him,he had to soak it in. Like some sort of rare Pokémon
"Good one Vic" Robert had glanced up at the screen and noticed her triumph
And he smiled. That bloody smile. It was smug or cocky, just a nice 'well done' smile. Genuine.
Moments like this made it really hard to hate him
Vic put on the music channel and flicked until she found a song she liked
"I love this one" the volume went up to I knew you were trouble
Aaron laughed as Vic put on her best popstar routine and sang along
He looked across briefly, catching Robert smiling behind his phone, repressing a laugh and gently tapping his foot to the beat
Was Robert Sugden a Taylor Swift fan?
This day was going to go down in the history books
As he continued to watch Vic's performance, Aaron was slapped in the face with the unfortunate realisation that no matter how hard he tried he still bloody liked Robert
Not the man who walked around college like it was his,and used girls because he could and wore Italian leather jackets
The boy,who wore odd animal socks,joked with his sister and liked Taylor Swift
It was liked he'd removed a skin and when at home he was himself
The self that Aaron could just wrap up in a blanket and admire forever
If only
The song had ended,Vic had taken a dramatic bow and continued to flick
"Chrissie's having a party next Friday. It like a Halloween thing,so costumes. You should come" Robert was talking to Vic, Aaron felt at bit like an intruder "Bring Adam,if you fancy" Robert didn't sound thrilled at the prospect but at least he'd said it.
Aaron made his excuses and got up to leave,he had to help Chas plan a 'spooky night' for the pub,the whole village was apparently enthused by Halloween, Aaron not so much.
Aaron was about to leave the room
"Don't bring Ross" Robert had twisted in his seat, staring him straight in the eye.
Aaron just nodded and left. Didn't even say bye as he raced through the door
Robert had just invited him to a party. Actually, directly invited him. Sure it was her party but still!
Aaron was so taken aback that he almost missed Jack,Andy and Katie approaching the house,the three stooges
Jack visibly tensed when they passed one another,he openly disliked Aaron and the Dingles in general. The feeling was mutual
Aaron heard the door shut and made his way down the path, burying his hand into the pockets of his puffer
He was halfway down,when he heard the familiar shout of Jack
He knew he shouldn't,but slowly he turned and walked back to the farm,the words getting clearer
"I'm sick to death of having this conversation Robert! I told you last week if I got a call from that college again that'd be it" Jack having a go at Robert? Aaron wasn't surprised
"It was blown out of proportion,I didn't do anything wrong" Robert defended himself
"Mouthing off at a teacher isn't not doing anything wrong Robert" Jack yelled, Aaron could hear him getting increasingly angrier
"I didn't mouth off,I just told her my mark was wrong! Do you want me to fail?" Aaron was closer and could just see through the kitchen window. Robert was stood by the sink,his dad sat at the table.
"Stop being such a smart arse! I don't even know why I let you do that flaming course,you could have just started working here" Jack was biting his nails,Andy, Vic and Katie were just sat there, watching it all
"I'm not working at the farm" Robert properly shouted this time,Aaron suspected they'd had this discussion before
Jack shot up from his chair and launched at Robert
"Oh you bloody well will! This is what our family have always done, you're not throwing away your future on some silly fantasies" Jack had trapped Robert in the corner
"Business isn't a waste dad. I have more ambition than shovelling cow much for the rest of my life, unlike some!" Robert shoved Jack's chest and tried to walk off
Jack had other ideas. Ones that involved stopping Robert in his tracks and slapping him. Aaron flinched at the same time as Vic. Andy looked somewhat pleased,Katie was by his side,but didn't share his enthusiasm, infact Aaron was sure there were tears in her eyes,but he wasn't close enough to see
Jack had Robert by the ear at this point, pulling him up
He leaned in and said something but Aaron couldn't quite hear it. He let Robert go,the lad quickly disappeared out of view, presumably running up stairs
Aaron didn't know how to react. He backed away from the house in shock, he'd heard Jack and Robert argue before but to actually see it was completely different. He didn't know Jack was violent, from the looks of it,the way Robert tried to leave and the way he recoiled,it was a regular occurrence. Aaron never expected it from Jack, especially not when Robert was already injured
There was a sense of guilt in Aaron's gut,he shouldn't have earwigged,but in a way he was glad he had. At least now he knew the full extent of the Sugden family life
He continued to walk down the path, speeding up,his mum would be annoyed,at least she wouldn't hit him though
"Aaron" He turned around to see Robert jogging toward him
He was confused to say the least
"You left this at that gaff the other week" Aaron hadn't even noticed his favourite North Face jacket in Roberts hand.
He was certain someone would have nicked it. He'd spent over 200 quid on it only a few months before,was gutted when he'd left it behind
But here it was in his hands,from Robert of all people
How did he even find it? Aaron had no clue where he'd put it.
Why had he taken it,why was he returning it? The two were hardly mates, Aaron had literally just humiliated him that night
How did Robert even know it was his? It's not like it was unique, practically every person he knew owned one
He was even more confused now
Aaron thanked him and made to leave for the third time that evening
Robert gently grabbed his arm and stopped him
"You should come to the party,Chrissie wants as many people there" looking at him up close Aaron could see the clear blue in his eyes,but he could also see the fresh bruise from Jack ,and his healing nose from Brandon Keene
"Maybe don't have to much to drink ey,and I'll try not to get in any fights, especially not with Stella drinking wankers" their was glint in his eye,that confidence there again
Aaron wasn't gonna say anything but he couldn't stop himself
"Your dad's a bastard" He regretted it the moment he said,but it was true
Robert looked somewhat surprised,but not angry. He just smiled in agreement
It was freezing outside,Aaron had somewhere to be and it was definitely gonna rain soon,but he made no attempt to leave
Robert was the same
They just stood,a second of quiet
Then Katie appeared at the door and called Robert in
He walked backwards, refusing to break eye contact, before reaching the door and spinning around to Katie,not before winking at Aaron
He looked back for a final glimpse,to see Robert and Katie at the door,she looked upset,he was comforting her.
So that probably wasn't over then
Aaron wasn't even sure he cared
As he left the farm and turned to the road he was dizzy with... excitement?
He wasn't sure how to place it. The day had been so fucking weird
He clasped the jacket,it had a slight whiff of expensive cologne. Robert's. The thought of it just sat in Roberts room made him feel funny
The way he'd smiled at him,joked, winked
Seriously,the history books would have to hear about this
So what if Robert was still seeing Katie? He'd invited him to a party,his girlfriends party but that was besides the point. Aaron had spent weeks avoiding him, just for today to be the best interaction they'd ever had
He felt like running home and playing love songs like some 13 year old in a teen movie
It'd be nice if Jack didn't exist
But he did. And he'd been a right prick before. Aaron stood there and witnessed it with his own two eyes
The whole thing put a bit of a dampener on the mood
Aaron could push it to the back of his mind, ignore it
He didn't want to. He couldn't. That was Robert,hurt. Robert fragile. Robert without the bravado.
Robert Robert Robert
He really tried to avoid him.
He failed.
He told himself he hated him.
He lied.
Robert was there. Aaron was gonna have to get used to it
If he was being completely honest,he was somewhat glad at the prospect
Robert had gotten under his skin and for the first time since, Aaron actually liked the feeling