Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Regina’s upset. She’s almost radiating it. And Emma desperately wants to fix it, wants to help. 

“What’s the dolphin’s tear for?” she blurts out. “I know you know.” 

Regina sinks down on her sofa in the den. She’s still looking quite pale, and Emma is worried for her. Still, she keeps her distance, leaning against a table nearby. 

“It’s for a potion,” Regina grimaces. 

“Well, yeah, I figured as much.” Emma suppresses the urge to roll her eyes. “What does it do?” 

The brunette is silent for a few seconds. “It quells the feelings of love,” she eventually says. “It makes you feel… indifferent.” And Emma is stunned.

“You made a potion to forget Robin?” she asks, and it comes out sharper than she intended. It makes Regina narrow her eyes.

“No, dear. It would not make me forget him … it would just erase my love for him. Apparently, I thought it was a good idea. And what’s worse ,” she sighs, deflating a little bit, “I can definitely imagine myself creating something like that to help with the pain. To help make it easier.” She makes a helpless gesture with her hand. 

Emma needs a moment to work through that information. “Tell me about the potion.” 

“There’s not much to tell,” Regina says. “The dolphin’s tear basically… absorbs the pain and grief you feel. And it leaves your body through… intense emotions. I believe it can be either crying, or… well, anger, I guess. After a few times… the love is nothing but a memory.” 

They’re both thinking about Regina’s mental breakdown earlier that day. The fights she had with Belle, and Emma, and not to mention, the fights she apparently got into the day before.

Emma clears her throat. “Did it work?”

“I… yes, I believe so,” the brunette answers honestly. “This is what I know about it without looking anything up. It probably wouldn’t work on True Love, so I guess… he wasn’t it. Because the potion worked… quite well.” 

“Can… can the feelings come back?” Emma’s a bit reserved this time, and Regina snorts. 

“Why, are you afraid if he comes back, it will start all over? I don’t know, Emma, this is what I know about it without going through my spellbook,” she says again.

They both let that sink in for a bit, and Regina sighs. “So I guess, he wasn’t really my True Love,” she concludes.

Emma’s heart aches for her but she feels relieved at the same time - and a little guilty because of it -, and she takes a few steps closer before sinking through her knees in front of Regina. 

“Hey,” she says, grabbing Regina’s hands, “The fact that he wasn’t your True Love doesn’t mean you loved him any less, right? From what I know, it's supposed to be super rare. True Love isn’t for anyone.” 

Regina snorts. “Especially not for villains.” There’s a hint of self-loathing in her voice and Emma always hates it.

“Don’t say that,” she fiercely argues, “You’re not a villain. You haven’t been for a long time.” 

“Tell that to the author, dear.” 

“Well, he can’t influence everything. I promised I’d help you find your happy ending. If Robin’s not it, then we’ll just have to look elsewhere,” Emma sounds confident and squeezes Regina’s hands while looking up at her. Regina frowns a bit, meeting her gaze. Her eyes turn thoughtful for a moment before she averts her eyes.

“You know, I told Tink this afternoon that I’m tired of everyone interfering with my course of life, that my life has always been coaxed into a direction outside of my control. And that I’m the only one I can rely on.” 

“That’s not-” Emma starts to protest, but Regina interjects. 

“I know, Emma. I wanted to say… I was wrong. At least about the latter part.”

Emma’s jaw snaps shut.

“Apart from you bringing back Marian- ah ah,” Regina adds, seeing how Emma wants to respond again and silencing her before she says anything. “ Apart from that , I think you’ve been the only one who’s been here for me. I don’t know why because I’ve tried my best to drive you away.” She raises her eyebrows with a hint of amusement, and Emma smirks. “Maybe you’re too stubborn, an idiot, or just not easily scared away or you like being told off. Because, well, I haven’t been the easiest one to have around.”

Emma smiles at that. “Well, no, you haven’t, but I’m probably checking all of the boxes above. I genuinely want to help you. You… just have to tell me what you need.” 

“You.” 

“Uhh… what?” Emma’s face flushes, and she loosens the grip on Regina’s hands. 

“Well, that maybe came out a little…” Regina doesn’t finish her sentence but chuckles nervously, cheeks a little pink as well while she leans back. “I meant that you've always… stayed. And that if anyone’s going to find out what happened, it’s me and you.”

Emma’s shoulders relax just a little, but there’s a tension between them now that’s hard to ignore. Unwillingly, she thinks about waking up this morning. Arm around Regina’s waist. How soft she felt. And how good they fit together. She tries to suppress a shiver. Pity, because it is a pleasant one.

“Yeah,” she finally says, but it comes out hoarse, and she clears her throat before letting go of Regina’s hands completely and standing up from her crouched position. “We’ll fix it together.” 

She suddenly needs a little bit of a distance between them before she impulsively does something she might regret - well, maybe she won't regret it but Regina might - and says lightly, "But first, we need a drink."

Regina seems relieved with the change of subject as well and flashes a small smile. "Help yourself to the best cider you've ever tasted, dear," she smirks, and they both remember the very first conversation they ever had after Emma bringing Henry back all those years ago.

"Uhm, maybe you shouldn't."

They both turn in surprise, finding their son behind them. He looks guilty and embarrassed.

"Henry?" Regina asks, surprised. Then, her brow furrows. "Why not?"

  "Well, I wanted to help and you were so sad and the author…" Henry stops and shuffles uncomfortably. Regina folds her arms and stands up. 

  "Spill it, kid," Emma says, now frowning as well. She stands next to Regina, bottle in her hands. "What'd you do with the cider?"

Henry reaches for his back pocket and reveals a page. It looks like a page from the author’s book, and he steps forward to put it into Emma’s outstretched hand. Then, he takes a step back as Emma unfolds the page. “I thought it was a sign, something that I had to do,” Henry mutters, scratching the back of his neck. “I found it yesterday after we’d visited the mansion.” 

Emma looks at the page and tilts it a little so that Regina can see it as well. In the image, she sees Henry brewing a potion. Below, it reads: “Henry wanted to help his mother with her grief and created a potion to make her life easier.” 

He looks guilty when both women snap their heads towards him. “I thought it was a clue, you know, for Operation Mongoose. That this was supposed to help you, mom. So I went to your vault yesterday after you left there and I looked in the spellbook and the forgetting potion didn’t seem so hard and I thought it would help, but… I kinda heard from Belle and Tink what happened so I think I didn’t help at all.” He looks unhappy.

“Henry,” Regina says, then frowns. “You wanted me to forget?”

“Well, forget the grief. And I kinda heard what you guys were talking about. I was up in my room. About the dolphin’s tear? I think I wanted to do the same but then with another potion? But I messed up and I’m sorry.” 

“Oh, Henry,” Regina sighs as she steps forward, pulling him into her arms. “The vault is dangerous, no place for a kid. What if something happened? What if you took the wrong ingredients?”

“Not smart, kid,” Emma agreed, and Henry’s shoulders dropped even lower. “I guess that’s  no Playstation for at least a month. And - but wait. Why am I affected by this backfired forgetting potion?” 

“Uhm,” Henry says softly, “I kinda put it into the cider because mom drinks it often but yesterday you were both drinking from it when I got home. I hoped it would turn out for the best because you didn’t have to forget anything but I think I messed up an ingredient because you both forgot an entire day.” 

“You could have-” 

“But nothing bad happened,” Emma intervenes, cutting Regina off. “That was really stupid of you, kid. Especially you should know that you can’t meddle with magic. Especially not with your mom’s. That’s dangerous stuff.” 

“I know. And I’m really sorry.” His head hangs even lower. “Especially after last night, I thought I did something good. But after today… I’m not sure. I heard that you had a fight.” He raises his head to see them both. “I hate it when you fight. You didn’t yesterday. Now… I kinda wish you remembered.” 

Highly surprised, the women look at each other and there’s a long pause, both afraid to ask the next question.

“What do we have to remember, Henry?” Regina then asks softly. 

He looks from the one to the other, unsure what to say. “Well...“

“Spill it, kid,” Emma urges.

“You had to cry , mom, when you were home… so hard, and it almost physically hurt me to hear it and I was going to come to you, but Emma was already there, and…” 

Emma’s eyes flick to Regina for a moment, and she sees how flustered the brunette looks. Emma flashes her an apologetic smile. “...and?”

“And you comforted her,” Henry says, but Emma's lie detector pings and she can see that it’s not all he saw. “But… I don’t know… you got along and these past few weeks you didn’t and I liked that you got along. You’re both my moms and I hate it when you fight.” The last words sound almost like an accusation, and Emma sees how Regina slightly flinches. “And I wish you could remember the good stuff, you know? You’re right, ma. I was stupid. And I should’ve told you this morning, right away, but I think I hoped it worked. I’m really sorry about the mess I made.”

“Oh, my sweet prince,” Regina murmurs while pulling him in a tight hug. “It was not entirely your mess. I made one, too. And we’ll just have to own up to our mistakes, all right?”  

“Yeah, I know.” 

“So… Emma’s right. No Playstation for a month.” 

Henry groans, and Regina smiles in his hair. No matter how tall he’s getting, he’s still her little boy. And right now, she’s going to walk him up to his room to put him in bed. Emma nods and offers to wait. There’s things they need to talk about.

When Henry changes in his bathroom, Regina sinks on the bed, thinking about Henry’s words. Apparently, the potion to forget Robin had worked tremendously well, if even Henry had almost physically felt the sorrow that had left her body last night. And then, today, it happened again. Some dolphin’s tear, she wryly thinks.

She looks up when Henry comes into his bedroom and smiles at him, but her smile turns into a frown when he quietly sits next to her. “Henry? What’s wrong?”

“I… I didn’t tell you everything about what happened, mom,” Henry quietly says. He seems a little flustered.

“ More magic?” Regina is startled, but Henry is quick to reassure her.

“No, mom, I promise! No, I mean, what I heard and saw when you… well, cried, I guess.” 

Regina’s not sure that she really wants to know the answer to her question, “What, then?”

Henry straightens his shoulders and looks up to his mom. “You cried, and Emma comforted you and then… well... you kissed her.” 

Of all the things he could have told her, this was not one she had expected. “I… what? I don’t… I’d never...” Regina stutters through her sentences until Henry cuts her off.

“Well, you did. And ma, she didn’t… I guess she was surprised and she kissed you back and after that I went away because… “ His cheeks are flushed. “Well, it’s not polite. And I was just going to leave the cider and go back to gramps and grandma. But it got me thinking, you know, how nice it would be if you and her were together.” 

Regina is too stunned to coherently respond and promises him to talk more about the matter in the morning before wishing him a good night. After closing his door, she leans against it, slowly breathing in and out. Surely it would be easy to write everything off to raging emotions, but if she’s completely honest with herself, it’s not just the spur of the moment. There’s… moments she’s always tried very hard to ignore because of various reasons. 

But kissing is nowhere on the list of things to ignore. She breathes out slowly and wonders what Emma will think of what Henry said. She’ll find out sooner than later, she figures, because while she’s descending the staircase, Emma emerges from the den and frowns at the expression on her face, worried.

“Regina? What’s wrong?”

“Henry…” Regina says, and she can’t say it here, not in the hallway when their son isn’t sleeping yet, so she grabs Emma’s arm and drags her to the kitchen. Emma lets her, while her frown grows deeper. Regina only drops Emma’s arm when they reach the kitchen island. And even then, she finds it hard to meet Emma’s eyes. Bracing herself, she breathes in, eyes drifting to Emma’s mouth. Her lips tingle. As if they remember something her mind can't yet.

“H-he said we kissed. Last night.” She feels how her cheeks redden upon saying it, and Emma’s eyes flick through the room anxiously before resting on Regina. She’s silent for a while, and then, she sighs deeply. Emma sounds almost… resigned, Regina thinks. 

“I’m not surprised.” 

For two seconds, Regina thinks she mishears. Because she most definitely does. Double, now. Because why isn’t she? “Why not? Because I sure as hell am.” It comes out a little sharper than Regina intended.

Emma is silent for a few seconds, as if she is waiting for Regina to come to an understanding, but when that doesn’t happen, she smiles a wry smile. “Really? The orphan with the trust and abandonment issues needs to spell it out for you?”

Regina looks at her, warily. “I guess you’ll have to.” 

Emma shakes her head, exasperated.“Regina,” she sighs, sounding a little impatient, “don’t you feel it? There’s always been this… I don’t know, connection, between us? Some kind of pull, electricity, tension, whatever you want to call it.” Emma holds Regina’s gaze. “You know I’m right.”

Emma’s right. It’s been there from the start. She just never paid a lot of attention to it, because they’ve always been running. From curses to villains and back. From forgetting to soul mates, to misunderstandings and more. 

“Yes, well, maybe,” Regina concedes, “but we never… I mean…” She is confused. Immensely so. Being in Emma’s proximity does not really help.

“No, we never,” Emma interjects, grabbing the edge of the kitchen island firmly. “Because there were always circumstances. Villains to fight, curses to break, soulmates-” she cuts herself off. An involuntary shiver runs down Regina’s spine, because that’s almost exactly what she’s thought before. “And I just… didn’t want to get in the way of your happiness.” 

Soulmates. Happiness. Regina bites her lip. She acknowledges that there undeniably was a chance for Emma and her to grow close before they knew of Pan’s curse. But it never happened. 

A silence falls over them, and it is a heavy one. It puts a weight on their shoulders, makes them uncomfortable until Emma gathers up all her courage.

“Do you remember… what I said to you in your vault?” 

Regina makes a waving gesture with her hands. “You said many things when you were in my vault,” she sighs, but Emma can see that she knows what Emma’s talking about, and she waits until Regina concedes. Again. “Yes.”

“I told you I wanted to be your friend.” 

“Yes. Yes, that you did.” Regina folds her arms in front of her chest. It’s a defense mechanism, they both know it.

“I lied.”

Sometimes, Regina thinks, the earth really comes to a full stop. This is one of these moments. She’s stunned. And she doesn’t want Emma to say anything else. She wants to stop her before she says something that they will both regret.

“Robin left yesterday,” Regina lashes out, both wanting to hear Emma’s next words and fearing them at the same time. “It’s hardly appropriate to talk about any of that.” 

“Well, yes, he did. But you’re the one that took a potion to erase your love, and it worked. So that makes right now as good as any other time. And I’m not the one who started kissing.”

“We- I- How do you know?” Baffled, Regina meets Emma’s eyes. “Did Henry - Do you remember ?”

Emma smirks wryly. “Well, no. I guessed, because I’ve been able to control myself for a couple of years already. I can’t see why I suddenly would not be able to do so. Plus, apparently I’m right because you basically affirmed it just now.” 

Regina shakes her head in disbelief and feeling unsure for the first time in a long, long time, she doesn’t know where to look. She feels insecure. Vulnerable. And she’s not even the one pouring out her heart here. Emma’s admission has astonished her. It intrigues her at the same time. She needs to know more.

“Years?” Her voice sounds small. Shaky.

Emma tilts her head only a little bit. “Years,” she confirms. “I’m very good at hiding.”

“But… Hook…” 

“I kissed him,” Emma shrugs. “I dated him. I even brought his heart back to him.” Emma smiles sheepishly and shrugs, a little awkward. “He was… available, I guess. I was lonely, hurt, and he gave me the attention I thought I needed. I thought being wanted was enough. Lost girl, remember? And being an orphan did wonders for my poker face. If I want to… if you want to... I can hide my feelings for you… indefinitely.” 

Regina still does not have the courage to do anything else but stare. Feelings . There are so many questions. She opens her mouth, but she can’t seem to form any sound, let alone sentences, and the silence lingers on until Emma sighs before taking a few steps to the door.

“Look, Regina… I’ll leave. For now. Because I really don’t want to ruin our friendship and apparently, I’ve said things you need to think about.” When she passes Regina, she gently touches the brunette’s shoulder. 

“Hey, and at least it wasn’t some new villain that we have to fight, right? It was just our overachieving son. We’ve solved this, relatively easy. Together, like always.” She gives Regina’s shoulder a soft squeeze. Regina, who’s still too stunned to say anything, simply nods. And so, Emma steps out, leaving Regina behind in her suddenly very empty, silent kitchen.

~*~

Regina can’t sleep. She’s lying on her back and staring at the ceiling. She’s fiddled with her phone for the last hour, wondering if she should send Emma a message. Wondering if she would get one first. Or maybe one in return. But the phone stays quiet, and Regina doesn’t know what she’d even want to type, so she just occasionally checks for messages in an automated gesture.

For the past hours, she’s gone over the history she shares with Emma. She’s gone back as far as their first meeting, bringing Henry home. Emma ruining her tree. Regina slapping Emma near her vault. She’d felt… threatened. Still so consumed by revenge. But it changed over time, and Emma had become her… ally. Now she thinks about it, she’s never realized when that happened. It just did.

Things changed between them in Neverland, both worrying over their son. Moving the moon together. Regina telling Emma that Henry was all she had, all she cared about… After that, there was an understanding. 

Yes, she’d felt... something . And she’d repressed this something, as soon as they learned about Pan’s curse and Regina had to give up what she loved most. Henry. 

Right?

So she made sure that he’d get everything he wanted through Emma. She’d instilled her own memories in their new reality before ending up in the Enchanted Forest again, creating a potion to help her sleep. But moments before she wanted to prick her finger with the sleeping curse, seconds before Zelena had appeared, Henry hadn’t been the only one on her mind. At the time, she hadn’t thought twice about it because it was obvious she’d also think about Emma. After all, she was her son’s caretaker.

Remember that moment at the town’s border?

Regina swallowed. She did. There was this moment in which Emma said that it didn’t sound like a happy ending to her. Then, Regina had thought it was because she would be separated from her parents again. But the tear-filled eyes… Now she thinks about it - did Emma’s poker face slip?

Her heart skips a beat as her mind thinks about the moment before moving on. To when they returned to Storybrooke, to the moment she saw the lion tattoo. Soulmates.

If she’s truly honest with herself, she wasn’t just stunned because she recognized the tattoo. Right after Emma and Henry had returned and Emma had been the only one believing that it wasn’t her who’d cast the new curse. 

She was also shocked because seeing the tattoo clearly meant that something else wasn’t meant to be.

Or was it?

Regina takes hours to mull over every encounter, every moment, to see what signs she’s missed. She’s analyzing everything she felt at the time, as far as she can still remember. She’d never had much with fairies and their opinions, so why did Tink’s message, all those years ago, weigh stronger than something else that could have been? Did she want a chance in happiness so much that she couldn’t even see past it?

If she’s done with that, she relives the encounters again, but then thinks about Emma’s words. She tries to spot signs of Emma’s feelings from the very beginning, but Emma is right -- she has a great poker face. And yet, there are a few slips which she now recognizes.

Saying goodbye at the town’s border. Making amends in her vault. 

Yesterday evening.

Regina pinches her nose. She’s developing a headache because of her overthinking. 

The only thing that remotely tells Regina anything is that Emma always touches her. Nobody ever does, except for Henry. The rest? Still too afraid. But Emma, Emma’s never refrained from taking her hand, touching her arm, leg or shoulder. For comfort, or just a gentle way to grab her attention. 

And she realizes, apart from Henry, Emma’s the only one who is allowed to touch Regina. 

She remembers the touch from the last morning. Emma’s body pressed against her back. Her hand on Regina’s stomach. 

She kicks away her duvet. It’s far too warm, she growls. Maybe she should take the winter duvet off, switch it for the summer one. 

It’s three in the morning when she gets out of bed and takes the summer duvet from her closet. With rough movements she makes the bed, trying to clear her head. Her body is so tired - not just from the lack of sleep, but all the emotional outbursts and magic potions coiling inside her body have worn her out, as well. 

After another thirty minutes, she gives up on sleep, entirely. If she’s awake anyway, she can better make use of her time. After all, she has a deal to honor because even if she doesn’t remember, she knows she made it. He’d never give up the missing ingredient if she hadn’t.

So, she sends Belle a text message, teleports to her vault, gets what she needs, and poofs back to the kitchen where she starts brewing a potion. She needs to address one of her books to get the measurements right but finally, after all the thinking and over-analyzing she’s done these past few hours, it’s something that keeps her mind from wandering to a certain blonde and thoughts of what it all means.

It is how Henry finds her in the morning, bleary-eyed from just waking up. “What are you doing, mom?” 

“Making a potion,” Regina curtly says, only offering him a small smile.

“For who?” He suddenly looks suspicious, and she can’t stop herself from rolling her eyes.

“Don’t worry, dear, it’s not for me. It’s for a deal I apparently made with Hook, and the last thing I want to be indebted to him in any way.” 

Henry seems to understand that, shrugs, and moves past her to grab the cereal. She continues with her potion and motions him to sit at a safe distance from her brewery, and watches how he starts to shovel the cereal into his mouth.

He swallows, and asks: “Did you talk to Emma?” 

So far for keeping her thoughts to the blonde at bay, Regina sourly thinks. 

“Yes, I did.” 

He tilts his head and waits for her to continue. She sighs. “She left. I- We…talked, and-”

“Did you fight again?” His shoulders drop, but she shakes her head.

“No, actually… we didn’t,” she reassures him. “We just need some time to think.”

“Because I told you I saw you kiss her?” 

Tact has never been one of his virtues, she thinks. “Partly,” she answers.

He’s quiet for a while, chewing thoughtfully.

“Did the curse break?” 

Regina looks up from her potion and arches an eyebrow. “Which one?” 

He averts his eyes. “The one I created,” he mutters, cheeks a little pink with embarrassment. 

She smiles. “No, dear, we still don’t know what happened. That will be my next project, however, I feel that Emma and I have filled in most parts.”

“I’m sorry, mom.” 

“I know you are.” She moves towards him and presses a kiss on his head. “You are still very much grounded, though.”

He groans, but smiles. Regina’s forgiven him already.

~*~ 

It doesn’t take long before Henry goes to school and Regina is on her way to the docks. She’s made a stop at Gold’s shop to retrieve the missing item first and keeps all the necessary items firmly in a container as she enters the Jolly Roger. All is still very quiet on the ship. She scoffs. The one-handed wonder probably inhaled too much rum to be an early bird, she snorts to herself. 

She bangs on the captain’s door - she could’ve entered but the idea of seeing any part of the pirate undressed makes her feel physically ill, so she gives him a few minutes to wake and get dressed. “Wake up, Hook,” she snaps at him through the door when he takes his time. She wants to get this over with.

It’s not long before a confused pirate, half-dressed, opens the door. Appalled, she takes a step back. He reeks of sweat, leather and a hangover, and she feels how her intestines protest when all the scents come together in her nose.

“What the hell happened to you ?” 

He looks at her with bloodshot eyes. “Got drunk,” he tells her, a bit hoarse from just waking up, rubbing his hand over his eyes and then through his hair. “Got laid. What do you want?”

His words send an involuntary shiver down her spine, but she straightens her shoulders. “I’m here to honor our deal. Let’s get it over with.” 

“Ah. Like the good witch you are,” he mocks and suddenly, he seems more awake. He makes a grand gesture for her to enter, a vicious smile on his face, but the stench inside is even worse. 

“Let’s take this outside,” she retorts, appalled, her brain still working through the ‘get laid’ part. “I’m not really in the mood for a carbon monoxide poisoning in the morning.” 

He smirks darkly. “Never figured you were the one to turn down a room filled with the scent of hot lovemaking,” he casually mentions, quirking an eyebrow, and for the faintest moment, her face drops. She knows he saw it, but she puts on a mask of sheer indifference within the blink of an eye.

Regina lifts her head and meets his… overly satisfied gaze and must refrain from clenching her jaw. “Then let’s get to it,” she retorts coolly while her insides are twisting and turning. “So you can finally use both hands. Maybe she’ll finally have some fun then, as well.” 

“She didn’t have anything to complain about, from the moment she looked me up last night. There was a lot of alcohol involved, as well, but this personal... savior of mine was relentless.” He clearly enjoys talking about his victory, looks at her between his lashes to see if there’s any physical response from Regina.

Inside, her heart breaks into tiny little pieces. She is surprised how hard the force of the word “savior” smashes into her chest - it hurts like she’s never hurt before. Everything screams at her to turn and walk away. She feels her stomach squeezing - it feels as if she needs to throw up. She does not want to see who’s still inside the pirate’s quarters - but who else then Emma could be here? Did the conversation they had yesterday hurt her so much that it drove her right back into the godawful idiot who was standing right in front of her? She feels devastated, insecure, sick to the core.

However, no matter how miserable she feels, she can’t ever show him. He’s waiting for a reply, and she will not give him the satisfaction of ever showing him how she feels. How broken she is on the inside. Her mask of indifference stays in place as she just quirks her eyebrow, while her world shatters around her. Again.

“Well, as… entertaining as your little adventure with the fairer sex might be, let’s get this particular part over with, shall we?” She turns to grab the item she retrieved from Belle. The pirate’s hand. The same one Gold attached to his body before the pirate went on an insane rampage and punched Will Scarlett into a bloody mess. She needs to focus on that and block everything else out.

“As the mayor of this town, I do have to inquire if you’ll be off maiming our citizens again, once reattached,” she coolly tells him as he dislodges his hook.

“Don’t worry, Madam Mayor,” he sneers, holding his arm out, and when she meets his eyes, he wiggles his eyebrows, challenging her. “I’ve got more... pressing matters to tend to. I’ve got a cute, badass blonde in my bed with very specific interests, who won’t leave this ship for a while. In fact , within moments she’ll be begging me to allow her to stay.” 

Oh god, she really, really doesn’t want to know. She turns away from him, nostrils flaring as bile rises up to her throat. She feels the need to throw up. 

She ignores his last remark, holds up the hand and starts muttering an incantation. A soft purple glow surrounds the hand while she lets a few drops fall on the stump. Gritting her teeth to ban everything else out, she watches how the glow brightens somewhat before it dies out again.

His fingers start to wriggle, and she lets go of his hand in a flash, not wanting to touch him any more than she has to.

“Our deal is done,” she says, face blank and voice clear of all emotions.

“So it is,” Hook says, satisfied. “Now, if that’s all, I’ve got someone to tend to. You’ll see yourself off of my ship, won’t you?” He turns without a thank you and opens the door.

“Babe? Where were you?” 

There’s an instant ringing sound in her ears, and black spots are appearing in her peripheral view as she panics and then watches how a woman with long blond, curly hair appears in the door’s opening. She’s practically naked, looks at her blearily, then turns to Hook, pouting. “I got cold.” 

Regina swallows a lump away before she registers what she is seeing exactly, and she blinks. Twice. Then, her eyes flick to Hook, who looks at her smugly.

“Got you there, witch,” he grins, enveloping the blonde bimbo in an embrace before pushing her back inside. The door closes with a loud bang, and Regina stands frozen in the spot. Only when certain sounds emerge from the captain’s quarters, she feels the familiar revulsion again and she hastily makes her way off the ship before she throws up on the deck. When she’s firmly standing on the pier again, she heaves deep breaths, gulping the fresh air, and she processes what just happened. What she just saw.

The blonde is not Emma. 

She needs to get away from the docks because it physically makes her sick to stay here any longer. Hook toyed with her and she let him - she was so easy to trick! She feels miserable again when she realizes she was so quick to believe what he was insinuating that she’s embarrassed herself to the core. How could Regina even believe for a second, especially after what happened last night, that Emma would run back into the pirate’s - horrifyingly smelling - arms?

She needs to see Emma, right now. Suddenly, there’s a desperate determination springing from her deepest core which puts her into motion. She must know if Emma is all right.

She looks at her watch. It’s almost time for Emma’s morning coffee, and without thinking, Regina teleports to right outside Granny’s diner. 

“Whoah. Regina? What are you doing here?”

Regina whirls around as the purple smoke evaporates, and she can’t hide the distress from what she just thought she witnessed from her face. She sees the blonde standing there with her hands firmly tucked in that hideous red jacket, eyeing her with a guarded look in her eyes, and Regina’s eyes flick over her body as if she can’t believe Emma’s really standing in front of her. Upon seeing Regina’s face, Emma’s brow instantly furrows. “What’s wrong?” 

Oh, god, nothing’s wrong. Not anymore. 

Regina feels how the waves of relief wash over her, cleanse her soul, and she wants to make sure it never happens again. Her breath hitches as she takes a brief moment to tell herself that Emma’s okay. She’s okay. They both are. 

And then, Regina finally takes her life into her own hands when she closes the distance between them, pressing her lips on the blonde’s, who yelps in surprise. Emma stiffens for just a split second, and Regina is terrified that she’s made another mistake, but Emma melts into the kiss almost immediately. Regina’s despair, terror and nauseating feelings evaporate immediately when Emma’s soft lips hungrily start to move over hers, and her belly is on fire - it’s a heat she’s never felt before. It almost consumes her when Emma softly bites in her lip and it extracts a whimpering sound from her throat she never thought she had in her. The heat rises and spreads through her entire body and when it reaches her heart, it seems to explode. She thought it was only her, but Emma pulls back, wide-eyed, and Regina registers it was something else, entirely.

The fog in her mind slowly lifts as she registers what Emma whispers. “Regina… I remember. ” 

And Regina realizes, so does she. She gasps. They’ve almost entirely retraced the steps of their missing day, except for the final part - how they ended up in bed together. Fully clothed.

Emma’s eyes are gentle as they both remember. Emma, horrified, asking what Regina did with the dolphin’s tear potion. Regina explaining what was about to happen before it actually did - breaking down emotionally for the first time, ending with Regina, heavily induced by the potion, desperately pressing her lips on Emma’s.

Regina looks away in embarrassment as she remembers how Emma carefully untangled herself from her arms before guiding her to her bedroom. “Try to sleep off the potion, Regina,” Emma had said. The memory of Regina’s desperate whispered reply, “Don’t leave me ,” softens Emma’s gaze, and it makes Regina close her eyes.

“After you fell asleep, I just couldn’t leave you,” Emma softly says while she cups Regina’s chin and forces the brunette to look at her. “I’d intended to stay awake. Help you through the next… emotional wave. But I guess I ended up falling asleep right next to you.”

“I took the potion,” Regina remembers with a thick voice, “because I didn’t want to depend on anyone anymore. I hated what Robin’s departure did to me and my mother’s voice kept… screaming at me that love was weakness. After I went to visit August, I couldn't take it anymore. I was frustrated with everything and everyone. Angry. You lost me for a couple of hours.” Emma nods, Regina sighs. “That’s when I created it. I didn’t drink it right away, I took it right before you arrived at the mansion, later that night. Henry must’ve gone to the vault after I left.” 

For a moment, they stand still, revelling in the moment. Emma’s hands frame Regina’s face, Regina’s hands are wrapped loosely around Emma’s waist. Emma brings her lips forward for a small kiss. “Regina, when you materialized here, you were incredibly anxious. What got you so riled up before you arrived?”

“Hook.” 

Emma frowned. “What? Why? What did he say? I went there yesterday after our conversation to end things with him.”

Regina sighs. Even more to apologize for. “It didn’t take long before he drowned his sorrow and took refuge into the arms of a blonde, big-breasted bimbo which he probably picked up at The Rabbit Hole. Only, I didn’t know that. He insinuated…” Her voice drifts, and Emma snorts in disbelief.

“Really?” She looks a little offended. “After pouring my heart out, you thought I’d run right back into his?” 

“I -- of course not. It’s just…” She feels how her cheeks flush again and feels entirely exposed. Vulnerable. “Emma, I’m not used to people… choosing me.” It’s true. Most of her life, people have left her, turned away from her, or came to her because they needed something from her. Truthfully, especially after marrying the King, she didn’t make it easy for herself, either.

Emma’s thumb slowly caresses Regina’s cheek. “Oh, Regina,” she sighs softly, shaking her head lightly. “Don’t you know?” 

“Don’t I know what?” Brown eyes search for answers in green ones, but Emma smiles, and Regina sees something in her eyes that shouldn’t surprise her, but still does. Every time.

“I’ve always chosen you,” Emma gently says. “Almost since the beginning. You just never opened up enough to see it.” She pulls Regina a little closer, and Regina knows Emma tells the truth. Her heart feels lighter. 

“Well, if it eases your mind, dear,” she says, a little confidence regained, “I do now. And… I choose you, too. I don’t know where it will lead, and there’s probably many obstacles, but-”

“Less talking, more kissing,” Emma murmurs before covering Regina’s lips with her own.

All that needs to be said has been said, and they’ll have plenty of time to figure out the rest. Regina melts in Emma’s embrace and sighs contently. This, she can get used to, she thinks with a shaky breath.

And she’ll have plenty of time to get used to it. 

They’ll have the rest of their lives.