Chapter Text
There’d been a delay between when Rafael heard Carisi’s shout and the gunshots and when he registered what they were. He knows this because his first thought as he’d been tackled onto the courthouse steps was irritation. He was fully ready to bitch Carisi out for his antics and the backache that was sure to ensue, but then things clicked in his mind. Someone was firing a gun. There was still some ongoing commotion. Were there more shots coming?
Even if it was far from his first experience with gunfire, it was still terrifying. That extreme spike of fear quickly dulled as he didn’t hear additional shots and other than the discomfort of being sandwiched between concrete stairs and a giraffe of a man, he felt fine. Carisi was on top of him, pressed against him … Thankfully there was still enough chaos and fear swirling around his mind to stop that train of thought before it got rolling. Those were best kept for Rafael’s evenings alone with a scotch rather than when he stuck beneath the detective.
He felt Carisi’s weight start to shift as he started to formulate what he was going to say. Maybe something about how he hoped Carisi’s hero complex was worth paying for Rafael’s chiropractor or how if Carisi felt the need to tackle a lawyer he knew a few defense attorneys that would make better candidates. His words didn’t come right away when Carisi lifted his head and Rafael realized just how close together they were, practically nose-to-nose looking at each other.
“You alright Counselor?” Carisi’s voice was breathy and strained in a way that surprised Rafael, though he supposed it shouldn’t given the intense circumstances and considering he was having trouble finding his own voice, he couldn’t judge too harshly; he’d just file it away to mock him later. He had the sense to at least nod and saw Carisi’s face visibly relax and break into a smile. He looked overjoyed as he moved to get up and off Rafael, but as he started to move his face changed to one of confusion. Rafael watched as Carisi glanced down and found himself following suit.
Blood. His first thought was reassessing himself. He had thought he was fine, but maybe not. However when he moved his hand down to check, it became abundantly, horribly clear that the blood wasn’t his.
“Carisi?” For once he wanted to be proved wrong by the detective, but he just continued staring blankly down. “Carisi!” At that, he lifted his gaze, looking absurdly calm. There was a moment where they both just stared and it felt to Rafael like waiting for a bubble to pop, but when he lifted his hand and saw it coated red, it burst. “Oh my god!”
He rolled the two of them over and sat up, quickly shedding his coat and pushing it tightly against Carisi’s side where it looked like the blood was coming from and then called out for help to whoever was around.
“S’okay Barba… m’alrigh…” Rafael wanted to scream and cry and yell because of course, the man that ran around doing whatever awful task he was assigned with a smile, the man that would show up to his office unannounced bringing homemade food and pastries for him and Carmen only getting a quippy remark as payment, of course he would slur out reassurances while bleeding on the ground. What an idiot. What a fool. What a stupid stupid self-sacrificing moron. He muttered as much in spanish as he looked down at his coat.
Then, as if he wanted to prove Rafael’s point even more, Carisi suddenly coughed and sputtered, choking out some sort of ridiculous apology for his coat. Before he had a chance to start yelling, Liv appeared across from him. She looked at him with a wondrous, steely determination and he instantly felt relieved both because with Olivia there, things would be fine and because he had avoided getting caught yelling insults at a wounded man.
Carisi mumbled out a casual greeting because of course he was concerned with niceties right now.
“Hey Carisi. Don’t worry, okay? You’re gonna be just fine. The ambulance is on its way and they’ll get you fixed up.” Even if she wasn’t speaking to Rafael, he appreciated the calm, confident tone. As she looked up at him he saw the nerves beneath her calm exterior. “There’s still more blood on the ground. Rafa, help me check him for other shots.” He wanted to berate himself for not thinking to do that earlier, just now noticing the growing puddle of blood beneath Carisi.
The two of them carefully rolled him to his side, toward Rafael.
“Shit,” as Liv removed her own jacket he looked over to see for himself, “two more. What’s the ETA on that ambo?”
“90 seconds, Lieutenant!” replied an officer off to the side that Rafael hadn’t noticed until then.
“Hear that Carisi?” with the makeshift bandages positioned, they went to roll Carisi back onto his back, as Liv talked to him. Even though he hadn’t expected more than a mumble or a cough in response, when he saw Carisi’s eyes closed panic washed over him a thousand times worse than when the shots first rang out.
“Liv!”
“Carisi! Hey! Look at me!” She didn’t sound calm anymore, but the forceful tone worked. Her tone softened again once she had eye contact, “That’s it. Keep your eyes open. Help’s on the way.”
Just as quickly as his eyes had snapped open moments before, Rafael saw Carisi’s eyelids droop again, not fully closed but not alert either. When those tired eyes turned toward him he wanted to be like Liv, to look at him and say comforting things, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t even feign calm. He couldn’t help in that way, so instead he found him pressing down harder on the damn wadded up coat and looking around desperately waiting for the medics to arrive. As Carisi, just kept staring, eyes glassy and tired, he felt like he needed to say something, anything to keep the detective awake.
“I swear Carisi, I’ll be so pissed if after all this time following me around like a lost dog, this is what actually gets rid of you.” Certainly not comforting in the traditional sense, he even saw Liv look up bewildered at his ‘joke’ but it’s what they do. The banter, the jabs, the insults that are rarely actually insulting. Rafael always liked when the detective’s eyes lit up ready with his own retort to some baiting comment. He hoped to see just a little bit of that now, but instead just saw the same far away look. But then he saw his face scrunch up in what looked like a mix of determination and pain. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Carisi’s hand reaching and immediately clutched it with one of his own. He wasn’t sure if he was providing comfort or being comforted.
“You’re gonna be fine Carisi. They’re almost here,” he could hear the ambulance siren closing in, “you’ll get carted off to the hospital, patched up, and pestering all of us again in no time. Okay, Sonny? I need you to make it through this. I’m not ready to lose you, not like this. You’ve got to hang on.” Just as he heard Liv shout out to the paramedics that pulled up, he saw Carisi’s eyes close and felt his hand go slack. “Carisi? No. No no no no… Sonny! Come on!”
As the medics descended on their patient, Rafael let himself be tugged back and away, knowing Olivia was there, her arm around his shoulders, but continuing to stare at the chaos as they took mere moments before loading Carisi up and carting him off, leaving a bloody mess behind. When he finally looked at his friend, he saw even more blood on her hands and her shirt and the knees of her pants and had no doubt he was in a similar state.
“We should get to the hospital.” For the briefest moment, she looked like she might argue, but just as quickly gave in.
“I’ll have a uni drive us over.”