Chapter Text
If Zhongli could turn back time, he’ll make it a point to meet Diluc again.
He’ll meet him under the same circumstances – in an empty tavern as his friend is wasting himself away on Mondstadt’s best dandelion wine. He’ll fall in love with him under the same circumstances – with stories told by his friend about his chivalric deeds and undying passion. He’ll write the same letters, ask him the same questions, tell him the same stories.
What he’ll change is himself.
He’ll never hesitate. He’ll set aside immortality for a while and focus on the now. He’ll tell him without fear that he loves him, that he’d rather have him by his side even just for a moment in his immortal life instead of letting him go. He’ll tell Diluc that loving him was never a mistake. He’ll tell Diluc that he’ll always find him in another lifetime and the next and the next when their short time together gets cut short by the mortal cycle of life.
However, even as an Archon, he could never turn back time. He moves forward, like everyone does, like the world does. The only thing that he could do is to look back.
And so, as he looks back forlornly at all that he had done in his now, nine-thousand-year existence, all he does is regret. All he does is long. All he does his weep.
Immortality doesn’t only mean a life forevermore, unfortunately. It also entails pain. Suffering. Regret.
All carried within him, for evermore.