Chapter Text
I could use your help, Geralt. Ciri winced as she tried to roll over. Her head pounded and body rebelled against any attempted movement. She coughed, hoping it might help her fill her lungs. “Do you,” her words fell out forced and hard, and Ciri continued the imaginary conversation in her head. Do you remember that day you found me in the woods? I was afraid, confused, and so very tired of running. You were there, Geralt. And I knew I would never be alone. Her eyes began to tear, but Ciri shook her fatigue and frustration away whispering to no one but herself. “This is not the time. I have to find a way out.”
I must have fallen asleep or fainted. Ciri coughed a few times, rolling on her side. I think nothing’s broken, but I’m certain this is going to feel horrible when I try to stand.
Struggling to sit up, Ciri took her time and scanned her surroundings. She’d only meant to jump away, intending to either open a portal or blink clear of immediate danger when the trebuchet struck the mountainside. When she landed, something beneath her collapsed, tossing her below.
“A cavern beneath Haven?” Ahead of her, natural arches suggested a path, but the lack of light from above or torches made her uncertain. “Is this what the Chancellor remembered? If this is the passage he spoke of, then I should press on.”
Broken wood slats were half buried by snow and other debris near to where she had woken, but behind her, the escape route was buried and blocked by snow. “Cheers, Commander. Your planned worked,” Ciri said, carefully rising to her feet. Her arms, legs and neck ached; her skin was mostly unmarred, whatever scratches and injuries she sustained were thankfully minor. “Yes, it definitely worked—a little too well for my liking.”
She rested her hands on her hips, the dim light underground giving her little insight. “Well, I won’t be getting out the way I came in,” she said, taking a few tentative steps—a test of her balance and ability to move. Her midsection twitched; a moment of pain circled beneath her ribs. “That will slow me a bit, but I can’t afford to stop and rest.”
Ahead of her, Ciri noted a path marked with wood slats leading deeper into the cavern. “All right. I can do this.”
l-l-l
Ketek’s frustration and doubt had plagued his mood since he was forced to leave Haven. Varric and Bull had nearly dragged him toward the Chantry and the planned escape route. It wasn’t right leaving her. We should have stayed. Every step of the way challenged him.
The path leading from the Chantry proved barely passable, it took a collective effort to carry goods and even people through the more difficult areas. Supplies were abandoned when they proved too cumbersome. Clay jars broke, and wooden crates that tumbled from missteps and unplanned stops lightened the load, but drew worried looks as their food stores suffered losses with each mishap.
He tried to be soothing, even encouraging as others complained of pains and fears. Ketek couldn’t be harsh like Malika had been during the preparations, even she had softened seeing the burden and sacrifices the people had to make.
When they reached the mountainside and the bitter winds descended, Ketek feared they would lose those who could not support a trek through the snow. He saw the strain of effort and the uncertainty on the faces of the people. At one point, he noted a young mother trying to shield her child had wrapped her cloak around the little boy. She struggled to remain upright against a gust of wind. When Ketek had offered to help, she recoiled slightly and refused. Evelyn had intervened, assuring the woman there was no place safer for her boy than with Ketek. There was no reason to be offended, they were all frightened and unsure; every one of them stumbling blindly through wind and snow. After an hour of carrying the child, a soldier offered to take up the burden with the mother’s permission. There were so many more who were tiring, and with no destination before them, something had to be done.
They’ve got to rest, Ketek thought, some of these people are ready to drop. Most didn’t have time to prepare in the evacuation's chaos, some didn’t have proper clothing. The clouds above gathered closer together until the clear night lay covered. He shivered as a blast of frigid mountain air cut through him, despite his size. Another fire might help, even if it’s only for a little while.
The first fire, lit by Dorian, was needed as a gathering point for those slower than the main group. It had served as a beacon for many. That’s what we need, he decided. Something for these people to look forward to; a sign that we’re making progress.
Ketek pushed ahead, his quickened pace earning a few half-hearted jabs from Bull and Varric. Cassandra was closer to the head of the procession. Once spotted, Ketek slowed his steps to enable easier conversation before speaking. He matched her strides and continued alongside her.
“Lady Cassandra, if we could allow those who need a rest to warm by a fire, it would help quite a number who are struggling.”
For a moment, he thought by the dour expression and lack of response from the Seeker, she would deny his request, but her sigh was barely audible. “Very well, we must take great care not to lose those relying on our protections.” Without stopping, she instructed Ketek to enlist the help of any willing to assist him.
Finding the willing wasn’t a problem. Listening to their speculations of Ciri’s fate gripped Ketek more than bitter winds. They’re wrong, he thought, watching Dorian light the wood pile. “She’s fine,” he muttered before rising to his feet.
“Of course she’s fine,” replied Dorian with a side-glance toward Varric. “Ciri is certain to reach us soon.” Even in the waning light, Ketek caught the moment of doubt that passed across Dorian’s face before he jabbed Varric with an elbow.
Varric took up the conversation. “You see Junior, this is what we writers like to call a brief interlude of doubt and uncertainty before the hero triumphantly returns. It’s normal. You’ll see.”
“Normal?” Ketek understood Varric and Dorian were merely trying to ease concern, but what he really heard was a convenient lie. The two nodded as if part of some absurd play for Ketek’s benefit. “Right. Normal. Got it,” he said with more resignation than intended.
Ketek knew someone stood behind him, he’d heard the crunch of snow beneath heavy boots. He guessed Bull had arrived; never quite far from Dorian and Varric, it always seemed as if they only appeared together whenever Ketek had a notion to break the rules. I can stay at the rear of the group, drop back and look for Ciri, he’d decided. Everyone will be focused on finding shelter, and I’ll track their direction in the snow. I can do this.
“Don’t do it. The storm’s getting worse.” The fact Bull seemed to know Ketek’s mind irked him more than the warning.
Without turning around, Ketek answered. “That’s why I have to go.”
“No, you don’t,” countered Bull. “Believe me, I’d lead the way if I could.”
Dorian agreed. “I have a strong feeling she’ll find us even before we’re able to search.”
Arguing with them made little sense to Ketek. It would be better to scout ahead and find shelter for the group. Then I can turn back.
l-l-l
Bull was right. The storm built as the group trekked through trees and clearings. Cloud cover above them obscured the moonlight. Groups huddled closer, not to keep warm but to keep one another in view. They could not risk leaving any behind.
When Cassandra spotted a large dark mass ahead of them, she took Ketek and Malika with her to scout ahead.
“Malika, use caution,” Cassandra instructed. “See if that is a path ahead, the high rocks should shelter the people somewhat more.”
When Ketek stepped forward, Cassandra held him back. “Eyes open. Be certain no signs of wolves or bears exists and be diligent.”
He nodded and followed Malika’s trail. The snow is deeper here, he thought as his boots sank in the snow to his ankles, we need to find a safe resting place soon; many will have difficulties if the snow continues to fall. We’ll need wood for fires and something to cut the cold.
A sharp whistle ahead pulled his attention, and Ketek sped his advance, despite the thicker snow cover. “Malika! Where are you?” Her tracks lay ahead of him; two small trenches showed her direction through the rock formations.
“Look at this!” Her excitement was clear. “There’s none of the ruddy wind! The rocks over there cut it to where you can barely feel it.” She swept her hand around in a circle. “There’s more than enough space for the tents. This is where we camp.”
He wanted to agree but knew Cassandra would expect a thorough investigation. “Yeah, I think you’re right, but before we go back, humor me. Check for tracks or signs of anything that might cause a problem.”
Malika offered a few of her personal opinions on the idea, but took off in the opposite direction, grumbling as she did so, until Ketek no longer heard her objections.
The ground was mostly clear of snow, only a light dusting compared to where they had been. The clearing was somewhat surrounded and protected by the towering rock up cropping, there was even a bit of a natural undercroft, with one area semi-covered by a large overhand. “Looks solid enough for me, and there are no signs of any animals in this area.” Beyond the immediate area he noted treetops in the distance. “A place to gather wood. Good.” Ketek considered that a wooded area might have the very predators Cassandra had expressed concerns about, but it could also be home to game, which meant food. He felt confident enough this would be the best option for them.
“Malika!” Ketek called out several more times before an annoyed response carried toward him.
“I told you it was fine,” Malika said with a sigh. “Waste of time looking for shit that obviously isn’t here.”
He tried not to laugh and asked that Malika keep her opinions in check so that Cassandra would accept their findings.
“Fine. Whatever. All I’m saying is, worrying wastes time. Which, let’s face it, must be a requirement to become a Seeker, or a Templar or whatever the Nightingale is supposed to be.”
“Scary,” Ketek said without hesitation. “I get Cassandra. I even understand Cullen. But Leliana? Yeah. I’m with Varric on this. Watch your back.”
Malika scoffed. “Back, front, side, and sleep with one eye open. I know. But point is? They gotta trust us, you know?”
l-l-l
Camp fires burned, and those who’d made it out of Haven huddled together quietly. The camp took advantage of natural barrier of stone and trees, cutting the harsh wind and snow to a minimum. They could wait out the night, maybe even two more days, but after that, so many would need food and real shelter. Ketek understood the truth. They had nowhere to go, and their supplies could only take them so far. Had they been able to use the mountain path, the group could have turned toward the Hinterlands or even the road to Jader.
A low murmur of dozens of conversations joined into a steady hum that settled at the base of Ketek’s head. He busied himself with chopping trees for firewood; something in the monotony of work pushed aside his worry, and the thwack of the axe against timber helped drown out the rest.
She’s all right, he reminded himself. Ciri is far stronger than she appears. Ketek stopped, his arm dropping and hand spinning the axe pommel with his fingers. No matter how many times he said it, his assertions rang hollow. “Oh, who am I kidding,” he mumbled, “how many things had to go just right for her to get out ahead of that snow?” He gripped the axe tight. And you left her. Nice going, asshole.
His attention wandered, and what Ketek saw tightened a knot that had started in his gut. An argument of heated words and aggravated gestures grew where the advisors stood. Cullen rubbed his face and turned from the others, finally tossing up his hands as if giving up. The ambassador appealed to all, but even Josephine’s practiced smile faltered more than once. Cassandra hid nothing, her accusatory gestures sparing none. Only Leliana stood rigid and silent, her arms crossed.
Ketek sighed and handed off the axe to a soldier nearby with instructions to keep at it. If they can’t work together, what chance do we have? All around him Ketek saw uncertainty, worry, and defeat. We need Ciri, he concluded. If she survived, and the people could see her, then maybe they could believe we have a chance.
One of Leliana’s scouts approached as if they meant to speak with Ketek, but the hooded scout did not stop. Their steps slowed as they reached him, their words offered quickly in a near whisper. “Go to the far tent and turn to the right. You’re expected.”
When the scout moved on, Ketek’s attention shifted immediately to the advisor’s area. Leliana had not moved. Maybe the message wasn’t from the Nightingale, he considered. He scanned the people around him, certain that no one met his eye or appeared to be curious of what had just happened.
Following the directions, Ketek wound his way through the camp, reaching the rear of the camp and the cluster of several makeshift tents. Those he passed ignored his presence, engaged in conversations and warming at small communal fires. Even before Ketek rounded the corner, he caught a heated conversation ahead of him.
By the tone and directness of the speaker, Ketek knew Evelyn led the discussion. “Waiting makes little sense. As much as I understand the need for caution, we should go.”
Agreements from others gathered suggested Ketek had found more who shared his concern for Ciri. His confidence renewed, Ketek joined the group. “I’ll go,” he said, “tell me what you have in mind.”
A hearty slap on his back answered him, before Bull shifted toward him. “You and me kid, we’ve got this.” There was something in the way every word Bull spoke carried a conviction Ketek envied. Ketek understood how Bull had earned his place, earned the respect of his men, and even when he wasn’t in charge, he still commanded the attention of anyone around him. “Let’s go before we’re spotted.”
“No one else?” Ketek wasn’t overly concerned, but he had hoped someone with a skill for healing might be a better choice. “What if Ciri is injured?”
The sound of shifting glass pulled Ketek’s attention to his left, Varric held up a pouch. “No problem, Junior. Got all you could need right here.” He handed the pouch over. “See, here’s the thing. If you and Tiny here go, I can explain that. A tale of hunting, male bonding, and a little hero worship spun expertly by me? No one would think twice.”
Evelyn snickered and then coughed to hide her reaction, earning a side glance from Varric.
“Like I was saying,” Varric’s attention shifted from Evelyn back to Ketek. “I can manage it with you two out there. But, add another or even two more to the group? There’s only so much I can say before someone would get suspicious.”
“Suspicious?” Evelyn’s disbelief took the place of her usual control. “Varric, clearly your grasp of the truth is astoundingly stunted. Every word you utter is disingenuous.”
Ketek said nothing, but agreed with Evelyn. There was never a clear way of determining what was true when speaking with Varric. Ketek still couldn’t fully trust him, but Ciri had shared she knew someone similar; a bard with a gift for storytelling and a talent for finding trouble.
“Oh come on now, not every word.” Varric grinned at her. “I warned you that spending too much time with Cullen would change your opinion of me.”
“What?” Evelyn nearly stammered out her response. “I. . . but . . you couldn’t.” With an exasperated scoff, Evelyn turned and hurried away from the group.
Varric leaned back on his feet and laughed. “Thought so. Pay up, Tiny.”
“Later,” Bull replied, “I’m taking the kid to search for Ciri.”
l-l-l
Ciri had lost track of time. How long have I walked? Hours? Days? Exhaustion and uncertainty had taken hold of her. Certain she was tracked by wolves at one point, Ciri had widened her path to use trees as cover. There were no wolves. There’s no one and I’ve had only weak signs of a path, she thought. I must consider that I am possibly quite lost.
A familiar voice carried on the howling winds. Ciri. . .Ci-ri! Melodic at first, the voice turning more urgent as she trudged through the snow. Cirilla! The sharpness startled her. “It’s not real. Don’t be silly. You’re tired, injured, and well, it’s damned cold out here, isn’t it!” She shivered. “Keep your head.”
She heard Geralt’s in her thoughts, his deep voice all at once supportive and still teasing. “Wouldn’t want to lose that, would you? Come on, Ciri. Don’t give in. You’ve got to keep going.”
“I know, I know, there’s no need to push,” she said to no one. “I’m doing the best I can.” Ciri stopped walking and laughed. “I’m arguing with the memory of someone in my head. Is that the first sign of losing one’s mind or maybe it’s a sign that I’m going to freeze to death and my mind is the first thing to go.”
The mountain was going to win; with her strength waning, Ciri was certain she would not discover the others before her body collapsed in the snow. Ciri’s limbs were heavy; she wasn’t sure if her hands were numb from cold or if what she felt was exhaustion.
She had to stop using her magic, it was draining her energy faster than the storm. I shouldn’t have tried to open a portal so many times. I know better.
She raised her arm to shield her face from the biting wind that mixed with snow and ice. “I must be heading in the right direction. I can’t be imagining everything. I’ve seen several camp fires. The last one had a few embers, I think. Could have been a trick of fatigue, but I can’t say with any certainty.”
Ciri continued her trek, hoping the winds might subside at some point. “If I could find a shelter, or a rocky alcove or a cave to wait out the storm, perhaps I could try again?” No, she thought, answering her question. Magic is not limitless, not even mine. I need to rest—and soon. Her steps labored and slow, Ciri let her mind wander as she walked blindly forward.
“I only closed my eyes for a moment, I swear I wasn’t sleeping.” Ciri looked up from the pile of books in front of her. “Honest.”
Yennefer hummed, and without a word, Ciri knew she’d disappointed her.
“I know you’re young, but one mustn’t fib, Cirilla. Not to me, at least. Of course there is a time and place, but this is neither.” Yennefer began to close the various books on the worktable where Ciri sat. “Time to rest. We will resume your lesson another time.” Even though the words were soft, Ciri learned to hear what Yennefer wasn’t saying.
“Oh please don’t be cross. I’m all right. See?” She gathered the books and opened the largest. “I don’t need to rest.”
Her mentor rounded the table quickly and crouched to meet her eyes. Yennefer sighed. “I’m not cross at all,” she said, tucking a strand of Ciri’s hair behind her ear. “I worry for you, and part of that is teaching you how to conserve your strength. You won’t need someone to look after you. That’s what I want.” She rested her hand against Ciri’s cheek. “Know yourself and how far you can go; when you are on your own, you must remember to rest when you can.” She stood and tapped Ciri’s nose. “Now, off to bed, and no reading. I mean it.”
The memory of her lessons with Yennefer coaxed a light warmth in her chest. Hopefully, I’ll find them both soon. “But first, I need to get out of this little predicament.”