Chapter Text
“I wanna be cremated,” Taehyung whispered against Namjoon’s lips. “And then spread my ashes in our backyard.” He giggled at Namjoon’s expressions.
“Is this the type of talk you wanna have on our wedding night?” Namjoon cradled Taehyung’s jaw and pecked his chin. “And I should be telling you what to do. I’m gonna die before you. I’m older.”
Taehyung licked Namjoon’s upper lip, then nosed his cheek and snuggled closer. “By one year. Doesn’t matter much.”
“Taehyung-ah, we got married today. I don’t want to talk about death, okay?” Namjoon wrapped his arms around Taehyung’s waist, settling next to him and pulling him closer. “We have a lifetime ahead of us. I just wanna lie next to you today and forever.”
Taehyung poked the indentation of Namjoon’s dimple and laughed. “Okay, then. Kiss me.”
*
Namjoon’s friends convince him to let everyone see Taehyung once before he would be cremated. Taehyung’s mom can’t stop weeping but she does it quietly, just like Taehyung used to. Namjoon watches Hoseok break out a sob as he stands above the casket. Yoongi has his arms around him, ushering him away so that people behind them can see Taehyung for the last time.
Neither Taehyung nor Namjoon were religious. But their parents were. They convinced them to get married in this church. Namjoon watched Taehyung walk down the aisle. Today he sits on the last bench, watching the service boys preparing to close Taehyung’s coffin. They should be leaving for the crematorium soon.
Next to Namjoon, Seokjin lays a palm on his bicep and squeezes, “Namjoon-ah, they say they’re ready. You wanna see him?”
Namjoon has seen him. He’s been watching him since he passed away last night. Too young, their family priest had said. He was too young. 35 is not an age to die.
“I wanna be with him,” Namjoon confesses. “I wanna go with him.”
Seokjin wraps his arms around Namjoon’s shoulders and cries. “I’m so sorry.”
“I miss him, I wanna be next to him.”
Somehow, Seokjin manages to lead Namjoon towards the casket. He hasn’t cried at all. Taehyung looks peaceful, soft skin, pretty eyelids, the mole on his nose that he liked to touch to the one under Namjoon’s lip, fringe perfect on his forehead— Namjoon’s husband.
“I love you,” Namjoon whispers, soft. “Wait for me. One day, I’ll lie next to you again.”