Chapter Text
Something was wrong, and I wasn’t sure how to fix it.
I should have known something was up when it wasn’t Kenzie who met me at the train station, but the elderly lady that she called her mother. I expected her to say that she’d heard about what I’d done, who I used to be...that I should turn back around and go home.
I’d been worried about it the whole way over, and so my first surprise came when she happily told me a taxi cab was already waiting for us. Then she held out her arm, and suddenly we were walking together. Like two normal people, instead of an elderly hero and a child-like monster.
Self-sabotaging like always, I tried to give her a few outs, chances to change her mind about today’s plan. She either ignored them or purposefully redirected the conversation each time, and soon we were side-by-side in the vehicle. The driver had put up a privacy screen so we could talk, but I had no idea what to talk about. She kept smiling at me, and I began to worry.
The first thing that came to mind was to ask her why she was using a cane, but being rude to someone you just met seemed like a bad idea. The next idea was to talk about the weather, but it was another perfect Spring day and that would have been a dead end. Finally, I decided to take a page from Kenzie’s book and just bluntly ask why May had been the one to pick me up.
Instead of telling me, the old woman had launched into a long and rambling story about her alter-ego, Spider-Ma’am. She didn’t even try to hide the fact that they were the same person, and as the tale went on I found myself torn. On the one hand, it was an amazing story and May was very talented at drawing me into her world. But at the same time, I felt on edge…
This story was ostensibly about her “greatest challenge” and supposedly the closest she’d ever come to death. Yet it seemed to take place years ago, before Gold Morning, on an Earth I’d never heard of. Worse, it had nothing to do with my question, and that had me worried.
Something was obviously wrong, but for now all I could do was listen to her story.
If this was going to go horribly wrong, I’d just have to deal with it.
And if this was a trap? Well, I probably had it coming.
“-but Doctor Connors said that Peter’s sickness was likely caused by radioactivity of the blood, and I assumed that it was due to the blood transfusion I’d given him a few weeks earlier.” May paused, then tapped a small scar on the back of her hand that I’d missed earlier. “I was bitten by a radioactive spider and that gave me my powers, you see-”
“Wait, the spider was radioactive? Wouldn’t-” I interrupted, then clamped my mouth shut as she recoiled slightly. After a moment, she gestured for me to continue, and I quickly added, “Sorry, it’s just that I’m familiar with the effects of radiation on the body, and that’s not...nevermind.”
I couldn’t tell her how I became familiar with the effects of radiation on the body. The countless experiments, the way people had screamed for me to just kill them, the sound of flesh melting as it dripped off their bodies and I just laughed like a kid watching cartoons …
As if sensing my discomfort, the old woman patted my hand and continued her story. She started by stepping back a little, and telling me about Doctor Connors’ own trigger, as strange as it sounded. Apparently he’d experimented with lizards, trying to restore a lost limb. He’d had the best of intentions, wanting to make the world a better place and help people, but...
Well, apparently it didn’t quite go as planned. Imagine that.
“-only a few months earlier, I had tangled with Connors’ amphibious and aggressive alter-ego, the Lizard. Anyway, it took quite a bit of fisticuffs and some help from Peter to turn him back. He was so thankful that he’d taken Peter on as his apprentice of sorts, and called in some favors to get a special serum flown out our way. It seemed all was well, but it’s never that easy, is it?”
“No, of course not.” I responded without thinking about it, and sighed. “Seems like the more perfectly plans are going, the bigger the disaster when they fall apart later on.”
“Unfortunately, the same Master Planner that had been hounding me all week decided to torpedo our attempt to save my nephew. He stole the serum, and I went on a rampage.” It was hard to imagine the spry old woman on anything resembling a rampage, even as her tone grew grim. “My powers had put my nephew at death’s door, and I panicked. Time was running out.”
“Didn’t you have other heroes you could call? I thought Kenzie once said that you were an honorary member of a whole bunch of teams? Also friends with a wizard, whatever that means.”
“As a mere honorary member, my sick nephew wasn’t enough to pull them away from fighting evil gods and alien monsters. I had to rely on more mundane help, such as a Daily Bugle reporter I knew with old ties to the criminal world. He’d gone legit, but was unavailable, and so against my better judgement I went to the office of his Editor-in-Chief...J. Jonah Jameson.”
May put a hand to her forehead, rubbing one temple with her thumb for a moment, then gave me a wry smile. “Now, you have to understand that Jonah is a...difficult man. Since the moment I first appeared as Spider-Ma’am, he’d been calling me a menace, misrepresenting my goals, and twisting my good deeds into malicious schemes. Normally I avoided him as best I could, sparing him a joke or quip rather than speaking my mind...but this day was far from normal.”
I wish I could say that it was an alien concept to me, going to your worst enemy for help. But hadn’t that been the very path I’d taken to get me here? Was that why May was telling me this story, trying to say that she understood how hard it could be to admit you had failed? To throw yourself on the mercy of people who hated your guts, and hope that they’ll do the right thing?
“Words poured from me like a sieve, and I gave him the rundown of the situation. I asked for his help...and he had nothing but venom and vitriol for me. It was as if the life of my nephew, a boy who had only just started college that very week, was worthless to him. I lost my temper, driving my fist into his desk and shattering it, much like the way I felt his words break my heart.”
I don’t know why, but this time I was the one who reached for May’s hand, and held it as she used the other to wipe at her eyes. “Thank you, dear. Just like now, I let my emotions out, and it had an enormous impact on Jonah. Even as I told him how much Peter meant to me, barely avoiding revealing my identity, I could see that the sight of an old woman crying had struck him.”
It certainly affected me, and I found myself silent as May continued to tell me about her panicked rush to find information on her own. The hours spent rushing around town, questioning random gangs and struggling to find a lead that would point her at the Master Planner’s hideout.
The pain in her voice as she talked about her thinker power, or spider-sense as she called it, was such that I could almost feel her anguish. It had evolved to the point where she could feel the danger that her loved ones were in, and now it seemed firmly latched onto Peter. With every moment that passed, she could feel her nephew slipping away, and it hurt her so very much.
“Just as I was about to give up, I heard gunshots from a nearby alley, and rushed to the scene only to find spent fireworks. The silence in the alley was only broken by rats scuffling in a nearby dumpster, but that all changed when a trap door in the ground popped open. A man in a purple jumpsuit climbed out, and I was on him like Watergate Salad on a housewarming party’s table!”
“Purple jumpsuits?” I was confused, then remembered the earlier part of the story. “Oh, that’s what the Master Planner’s men wore! Wow, your villains had some really odd costumes.”
“Oh if you think that’s bad, remind me to tell you about Advanced Idea Mechanics sometime. Yellow jumpsuits, beehive-looking helmets, and...well, it was a whole thing.” May smirked, then mimed throwing a few punches as she acted out the fight that followed. There had been dozens of men and women standing against her, but she was finally on track to saving her nephew. Soon, she was facing off against an old enemy of hers, and then things fell apart…
Quite literally, in fact. I was starting to understand that May’s old world was very much like that of an old comic book. So when she started a violent fight in a supervillain’s underwater base, there was really only one way things could end. That serum must have been load-bearing!
“I found myself trapped under a huge machine the size of a small house. The serum was mere feet away, water was pouring in faster and faster, and I was struck by how badly I had failed. I’d come out here solo, wrecked my body while ignoring my common sense, and now I was going to die in a supervillain’s lair…all alone. I started to relax, letting myself sink down, to give up.”
I leaned in, taking in every word as she spoke, even though I knew May survived to tell this story. I was so invested, it was like I was right there with her...
I heard a voice shouting for me to wake up, one I never expected to hear being so positive.
When I dragged my face out of the water, I realized that it was Jonah’s voice, and he was only a few feet away. He bragged about having used his investigative skills to find this place, setting off fireworks to get my attention, and hiding in a dumpster. The fool had followed me down to get the scoop, camera in his hands probably full of what he’d spin into a front page story.
I begged for him to get the serum and escape, but in a change of character that confuses me to this day, he refused. Instead Jonah grabbed the machine and started trying to lift it, growling at me to hurry up and help him. I tried to ward him off, but he refused to leave, saying that after all I’d told him about what Peter meant to me...was I honestly going to just lie down and quit?
Perhaps it was exhaustion, blood loss, or simply a senior moment, but his words reached me. I found myself thinking about my family, all those that I cared about, and remembering the impact they’d had on me. More than that, I was struck by this sudden change in Jonah, and how he was putting his life in my hands rather than running off like a coward.
I thought of my husband Ben, the man who had been by my side for decades and even now was giving it all he had to help our nephew. What would he say if he knew I was about to give up? Anyone could win a fight when the odds were easy, but it was when the going got tough...when there seemed to be no chance...that’s when it counted!
Next was Peter, my handsome, brilliant nephew, fighting for his life even at this moment. The last thing he’d said to me when I saw him at the hospital was that college was going so well. He’d made so many friends, Harry and Gwen, and had even run into Flash Thompson and buried the hatchet with the boy. If I failed him now, he’d never see them again!
Finally, I remembered all the times I had fought for New York, and how its people had always had my back. They looked away when my mask was torn asunder, gave me medical attention after a tough battle, and offered me a lift when my web fluid ran out. From the smallest child cheering me on to the oldest elder waving a cane as thanks, they loved me!
Little by little, I felt strength flood my limbs, despite the rising pain that came with it. I began to crouch, then lift, and then finally threw the machine aside with the last of my power.
I knew that at any moment I’d fall, so Jonah and I high-tailed it out of there.
Peter was counting on us.
“We barely made it out before the place collapsed, and flagged down a cab much like this one.” May gestured at the cab around us, and I realized that my eyes were burning slightly. I took a moment to wipe them, pretending that it was just because I’d forgotten to blink and not from the emotional story. “Made it to the hospital just in time, Jonah shouting all the way.”
The cab began to slow, and May looked around as if just now realizing that we were nearly at our destination. I had completely lost track of where we were, and wondered if she’d purposefully skipped some parts or padded the story so it would last just long enough. Even now, she seemed to be tying up loose ends and rambling a little as the cab came to a halt.
“In the days that followed, Jonah returned to his old ways, but was far less malicious than before. I never asked him what part of my story had inspired him so, and he never told a soul what I’d said about Peter. Later, the Jackal cloned me and I was surprised to hear that she started dating Jonah of all people. Of course, Mary Reilly was her own woman, so I-”
“Wait, you had a clone? What the heck? You can’t just drop that one me at the end of a story like it’s nothing!”
But the cabbie tooted his horn and glared at us in the rearview mirror, and we had to get out.
“Maybe next time, dear. Right now, I think you have another question for me?”
Ah, here it was. Time for reality to intrude on the fantasy.
It had been nice while it lasted, I guess.
***
“Not that I don’t appreciate it but...what was the point of that story?” I blinked in the light of the sun, then turned back and held May’s cane for her. “I was just asking why you and Kenzie invited me over, went through all the trouble of getting permission from the Wardens…”
As May climbed out of the cab and stretched, I pretended to do the same while pulling the leg of my pants back down over the device the Wardens had put on my ankle. I could have removed it if I wanted to (or popped my leg off, if I had a tarp on hand), but this had been part of the deal. It was far less restricting than a prison cell or the heroes they usually had following me, I guess.
“Actually, it was more Kenzie than me. I wanted to have a chance to chat with you, and was hoping you’d see the parallels between my story and your own trials.” May nudged me with her shoulder, and we began to walk down the block together through the suburban neighborhood. “As for why you’re here, my daughter mentioned how you always seemed so happy to see her, and yet so lonely in your little apartment when she had to leave. She used to be the same way, back when we first adopted her and she hadn’t made any friends outside of our family.”
“I’m guessing this is the part where you tell me that with family, friendship, and love, she eventually overcame her regrets and became an amazing hero? That if I follow in her footsteps, stick to the program, and join you then I too can be a hero? That people will trust me-”
“Kenzie trusts you.”
“Kenzie is a little kid.” I retorted, then felt a rush of annoyance as May barely reacted. “Look, I agreed to come over for tea because Kenzie said it was ‘super important’ and I was kinda bored. But all this cryptic stuff is really starting to get on my nerves, so please cut to the chase.”
“Very well, apologies for being harsh, but you’re a hypocrite.” May’s tone hardened, and I nearly stumbled as I heard the last word. I spun and felt a flush of anger, but saw her face had turned quite serious. “You told Kenzie that a tinker needed people to anchor them, as if giving her advice. Yet despite that, in the last few months that she’s been visiting you, the only people you interact with are the Wardens and my daughter. Kenzie has offered to bring others to visit you, but each time you turn her down. It’s like you’re only pretending to get better, and it worries her.”
“That’s not...I mean...” I wanted to slap her, but May was the hero who’d wrecked her body distracting a Titan so her kids could try to end our war with them that much faster. My eyes were drawn to her cane, and I realized it was in the wrong hand. That this whole time she’d been walking without it, just pretending to be hurt! “You...you’re faking, too! You don’t need that cane!”
“True, I don’t need this cane anymore, but I have my reasons for continuing to carry it.” She flipped it in her hands, spinning it around like a baton and then tapping it on the ground. “It helps remind the others that nobody is invincible, and that there’s a price for everything. Plus, my husband nearly lost his leg fighting Titan Eve, and this way we can walk together more easily.”
I wanted to attack the rest of her accusations, but my phone buzzed to remind me to check in with the Wardens. I numbly pulled it out and entered a code phrase, knowing it was taking pictures of my surroundings to show that I wasn’t up to my old habits.
As I stowed it away, I saw that May had come to a stop and was leaning on a wooden fence. She sighed, “In my story, Spider-Ma’am had been crushed under the weight of her own failures. From what Kenzie told me, that’s similar to how you sometimes feel, trapped under the weight of your regrets and reputation. I’m sorry to presume, but I thought it would help.”
“Yeah, and I get that. But in your story you found strength from within because you had people and loved ones to motivate you. I don’t have anything like that.” I avoided her gaze, not wanting to see the pity that always appeared on Kenzie’s face when we talked about this sort of thing. She always seemed so sad that I was alone, and I always lied and said it was fine. “I’m alone.”
“Sounds like you need a change, which brings us back to Kenzie. She remembered how much her life changed for the better when she moved in with us. Her home life, tinkering, and general outlook on life improved so much...and she wants the same for you. The pair of us have been talking to the Wardens all month, and today we were hoping to convince you to live with us.”
“Wait, are you seriously suggesting that she-” I cut myself off, shaking my head as May’s smile widened. “But I need chaperones! Therapists! 24/7 surveillance and all kinds of safeguards!”
“Two heroes make excellent chaperones, and it so happens that one of them is a tinker specializing in surveillance. We know several excellent therapists, and as you can see there’s plenty of space.” May gestured at a nearby house with a few people outside of it. “Peter and Natalie are getting a house together, so his room and half of Kenzie’s workshop are free.”
“But you barely know me!” I protested, and talked over her as May started to respond. “Seriously, I get that you’re a nice old lady and Kenzie is an innocent kid, but I’m dangerous! I hurt a lot of people, and if you let me live with you it’ll put you all in terrible danger! Plus, I could snap at any time, and you’d all-”
“I don’t care, dear.” She shrugged, and I could see that the others were looking at us because of my outburst. They didn’t rush to protect May from me, and she continued. “My spider-sense hasn’t even twitched in the months you’ve been seeing my daughter. You’re a good girl.”
I wanted to tell her how wrong she was. The people I’d hurt. The monsters I’d created. The families I’d destroyed. The horrible names people called me. I’d only known May for an hour, but I didn’t want to hurt her. She had to know better than this!
But then I remembered Kenzie. The past few weeks, she’d been a ray of sunshine in my life, of bright optimism and happiness. Her stories had been a source of inspiration. She was my...she was my friend, wasn’t she?
Had this been her plan all along? Even now, I could see her smiling at my shocked stare, as if knowing what was on my mind. She waved, then tugged the others to walk in our direction.
Beside her, an old man was walking with a cane like he actually needed it. He was followed by a nerdy-looking guy, and a short woman in glasses. Both wore engagement rings.
It was nice, looking at a happy family, but also scary that they were just letting me into their home like this. Like I actually deserved it after all I’d done.
“You don’t have to decide right now, but we’re here if you want us.” May’s hand was on my shoulder. “We’ll always be here for you.”
“Okay.” I swallowed the lump in my throat, turning and holding out a hand. “I’ll move in. Thanks for having me, May.”
“No, thank you for joining us, Riley.” May took my hand, and drew me into a hug.
I wanted to reply, but Kenzie was wrapping her arms around us, talking.
Over my friend’s happy babbling, I heard May whisper...
“Welcome to the neighborhood.”
THE END
*****************
AN: That’s where this story draws to a close. Originally it was going to end with the last chapter, but I figured that if Ward had a few epilogues, the least I could do was have one. As it happens, I finished my reread of Ward a few days before writing this, and that’s part of how it came into being. I saw 20.e4, with Riley returning to civilization and Kenzie trying to befriend her, and something about that really touched me. Especially the line about people being anchors.
In this case, I considered how that conversation might go differently if Kenzie was the one we’ve seen all throughout this story. She knew that Riley was trying to start over, and rather than let her continue to isolate herself in a lonely apartment...figured the Wardens might let her live somewhere better. Maybe a nice neighborhood, with caring people to guide her and a pair of proven heroes living with her? The story has come full circle, with Kenzie “adopting” Riley.
May’s tale is inspired by Amazing Spider-Man, issues 31-33. It’s a meaningful story to me, because it involves Peter under an impossible strain...physically, mentally, and emotionally. Only with inspiration from his family, the knowledge that people are depending on him, does he manage to overcome his challenges. May first mentioned it in Chapter 5, telling Capricorn how a certain “master planner” nearly killed her, and I figured it couldn’t hurt to use as an analogy.
Anyway, that’s the story. It’s not perfect by any means, but I’m proud of what I’ve made despite its origins as a silly crackfic idea. Luckily, the way it's written means I can come back to it at any point, but for now I’m ready to move on to something else for a while. Similar ideas, but with different people and in another place. There are plenty of other heroes to mentor, problems to solve, and adventures to go on.
This was a lot of fun to write, and I hope you enjoyed reading it.