Chapter Text
Oikawa: hel[
Shirabu: ?
Oikawa: iwa
Oikawa: cheek
Oikawa: lips touch cheek ＼(◎o◎)／！
Suga: he kissed your cheek?
Suga: he KISSED your CHEEK?
Suga: HE KISSED YOUR CHEEK!!!!
Oikawa: YES!!!!
Hinata: PROGRESS!!!!!
Oikawa: PROGRESS!!!!
Suga: WoOOOOOoOOOoOOOOOOO
Suna: congrats :)
Oikawa: the excitement is visible
Suna: ofc ofc
Yama: AHHHHHH PROGRESS!!!
Oikawa: PROGESS!!!
Kenma: are you doing this again?
Akaashi: i think they are tbh
Oikawa: HUSH
Oikawa has changed Kenma’s name to Catboy
Oikawa has changed Akaashi’s name to Owl-Tamer
Owl-Tamer: why?
Owl-Tamer: what did i do to u?
Catboy: wtf
Catboy: why can't i change it back
Catboy: give me admin bitch
Catboy: or ill text iwa
Oikawa: YEP FINEES
Oikawa has given admin to Catboy
Catboy has changed their name to Kenma :3
Suga: thats kinda cute :)
Kenma :3: ty
Owl-Tamer: help
Kenma :3: ofc bestie
Kenma :3 has changed Owl-Tamer’s name to Kaashi <3
Hinata: kenma going soft?
Tendou: never thought id see it tbh
Kaashi <3: stfu
Kaashi <3: don't ruin this for me
Kaashi <3: hes being pure
Kenma :3: im just happy :)
Yaku: what happened?
Kenma :3: kuroo told me he has a crush on a member of the team
Kenma :3: not only that but he said they’re his best friend and that they hang out all the time
Kenma :3: do you think it might be me?
Yaku: YES
Yaku: 150%
Kenma :3: i gues ill see soon hopefully
Hinata: ooooh
Hinata: do you think kageyama likes me?
Hinata: i know were always arguing but he always helps me whenever i need it
Suga: how so?
Hinata: well a few times hes held an arm around me on the metro
Suga: awwwww
Suga: thats sweet
Oikawa: gve me ore
Oikawa: i need this
Hinata: ok?
Hinata: a few times hes come over to my place to watch my sister with me when my parents are out of business trips
Hinata: which means hes over all the time
Hinata: my parents are barely home
Suga: why didnt you tell us that?
Suga: you could always bring natsu down to the gym yk?
Hinata: wait rly????
Hinata: holy crab-buckets!
Shirabu: why is this so soft
Shirabu: we left this chat with Tendou seeing ushijimas dick-
Oikawa: wait yeah
Oikawa: tendou?
Tendou: okay so i may or may not have walked into the bathroom while he was getting changed ;)
Shirabu: question: is he packing?
Tendou: YES.
Tendou: BIGGEST DICk IVE EVER SEEN SHIRABU
Shirabu: congrats
Suna: this is gross
Suna: disgusting
Suna: nasty
Hinata: i think its interesting
Suga: hush now child
Yama: no but it rly is
Yama: tendou, how big on a guess for inches?
Tendou: hmm at least seven
Oikawa: TFFFF
Oikawa: NO MAN
Oikawa: NOT HUMAN
Tendou: ThATS WHATS I SAID
Suga: how tf is he still standing?
Noya: wOW
Noya: im not even mad that i missed some of this
Suga: yeah where were u?
Noya: me and tanaka were kidnapping some cats
Noya: a cat cut tanakas head open so we went to the hospital
Hinata: WHY DIDNT YOU TAKE MEEEEE
Yama: OR MEEEEEEe
Atsumu: or meeee (hi im late wtf is happening?)
Kunimi: idk
Kunimi: ive been wtachig and the convo changes ever two mins
Kunimi: it started with iwa kissing oikawas cheek, then kenma is hopeful with kuroo, then hinata and kageyama soft shit then talking bout ushijimas dick.
Atsumu: awe man i wish i was here to participate :(
Kunimi: well theyre still on abt his dick…
Oikawa: YES SO DON'T INTERUPPTER
Suga: wait i wonde rhow big daichis is
Noya: hes got to be big man
Noya: bc he IS a big man
Suga: -_-
Suga: but that is true tbh
Hinata: this convo is concerning :3c
Kenma :3: yes shoyo but u have to enjoy
Kenma :3: how big do you guys think kuroo is?
Yaku: having seen it, i will say, mans packing big time kenma
Yaku: probably not as big as farmer boy but hes DECENT
Kenma :3: ty
Shirabu: Semi probably isnt that big but idc anymore
Atsumu: ^ felt
Suna: same
Suna: he has to be small like u bitch
Atsumu: wtf
Atsumu: ACTUALLY WERE BOTH PACKING BITCH
Suna: ..
Atsumu: wait
Atsumu: THST CAME SOUT WRRONG
Suna: NO SHIT
Atsumu: I MEANT HES TOLD ME BEFORE DUDE
Atsumu: WERE T W I N S
Suga: im
Noya: pop off?
Hinata: -.- i do not see
Kaashi <3: felt
Yama: ^
Kunimi: ^^
Atsumu: sigh
Suna: did you hust write sigh
Atsumu: yes
Atsumu: yes i did
Atsumu: got a problem with that?
Suna: many
Atsumu: well fight me asslicker
Hinata: <he sounds like kageyama when hes yelling at me…>
Suga: LMFAO
Atsumu: nOPE
Hinata: sorry not sorry mister man
Hinata: just the honest truth >:)
Yama: your terrifying sometimes
Atsumu: fr
Kaashi <3: but thats why bokuto loves u hon :)
Hinata: :))
Suga: :(
Hinata: :DDD
Suga: <3
Kenma :3: <3 :3c
Hinata: :33
Kunimi: anyway-
Shirabu: lets go to the beach each lets go get a wave
Hinata: THEY SAY WHAT THEY GONNA SAY
Oikawa: GRAB A DRINk
Tendou: CLIUJK
Shirabu: welp
Yama: can we all actually meet at a beach? thats sounds fun :)
Suga: hmm
Kaashi <3: im in :)
Suga: ill bring some food ig
Atsumu: i can go if this is happening
Oikawa: smae
Kunimi: smae <3
Oikawa: stfu you orangutan
Kunimi: D:
Kenma :3: yaku is banging on my door
Yaku: LETS GO TODAY
Yaku: IM KIDNAPPING CATBOY
Kenma :3: NO
Yaku: YES
Kenma :3: HE BROKE DOWN Y DOOR WTF
Kaashi <3: ily bro
Kenma: yooowuei
Tendou: we lost him :(
Shirabu: not a survivor, but a victom
Hinata: he will be missed <3 :(
Kaashi <3: rip
Suga: his gravestone: “Here lies Kenma Kozume, a simp”
Yaku: a good one ^
Atsumu: is my boy alive?
Kaashi <3: probs sleeping
Yaku: ten points to fukurodani
Hinata: has anyone ever thought
Hinata: what would happen if a frog and a duck fucked?
Suga: what
Hinata: kike would the babys be duck sized or frog sized? Who’d fuck who? Who’d get pregenate
Suga: pregenate?
Hinata: preganate.
Yaku: tf
Atsumu: ive thought abt this multiple times
Atsumu: i think the frog would fuck the duck
Atsumu: and the duck would lay eggs but theyd be small
Atsumu: then the eggs would hatch into two legged frogs but bigger
Hinata: oooh
Atsumu: you get me?
Hinata: bery
Shirabu: i can't do this tdy
Suna: same
Shirabu: wanna go commit homicide?
Suna: sure
Shirabu: kk
Shirabu: omw
Suna: got it
Suga: NO NO NO NO
Suga: were going to the beach :(
Kaashi <3: yeah :(
Yaku: yep im going to collect kaashi and kenma and bring them
Suga: omw to noya, yamas and hinatas :)
Yama: DAMNIT
Yama: i thought if i didnt say shit youd forget bout me :(
Noya: i passed out ;)
Yama: tf how?
Noya: asahi has hot abs bro
Hinata: bro?
Noya: bro.
Hinata: BRO
Noya: BROOOO
Yama: bro…?
Noya: BROOOO
Hinata: BROOOOO
Yama: broOOOOO
Suga: current;y speeding
Shirabu: Tendou has trapped me in his car
Tendou: i turned on child lock :))
Suna: losers
Atsumu: haha bet bitch
Atsumu: omw to urs rn
Suna: f u
Suna: you wiont get ma elive
Suna: btich.
Atsumu: clap
Suga: where tf did oiks and kunimi go?
Oikawa: sry i kidnapped kunimi tho
Kunimi: i stabbed his finger and he cried
Oikawa: weLL NO FUCKiN SHIT
Kunimi: don t tet and drive bitch
Oikawa: well FUCK YOU TOO
Oikawa: LITTLE SHIT
Kunimi: im hurt.
Hinata: GUYS
Hinata: GUYSSSS
Hinata: GUYS!!!
Atsumu: ?
Hinata: KAGEYAMA JUST CALLED ME
Suna: why rnt you on the the phone then?
Hinata: well i didnt answer
Hinata: but tsull!
Suga: …
Yama: i lose hope evry day
Hinata: he calling brb
Noya: suga please
Noya: suga
Noya: just leave me in peace
Suga: only if you share the pic i know you fucking have
Noya: his abs are mine tho :(
Suga: im climbing through a window.
Oikawa: damn suga scary
Yama: ik
Kaashi <3: fr tho
Kaashi <3: i swear he could set me on fire and id be silent out of fear
Suga: :)
Yaku: thats scary as shit tbh
Kenma :3: don't text and drive udiot
Yaku: why do you care mr murder
Kenma :3: bc i havent kissed kuroo yet
Kaashi <3: thats wholehoe
Kaashi <3: WHOLESOME
Kaashi <3: WHOLE S O M E
Kasshi <3: SOMEONE EXLSE TEXT
Kaashi <3: PELASE
Hinata: kageyama just got kidnapped :o
Kaashi <3: what
Suga: tf
Oikawa: lets go to the beach beach lets go get a wave-
Oikawa: well that was bad timing
Kunimi: dmn oikawa
Kenma :3: shoyo
Kenma :3: continue?
Hinata: idk
Hinata: he yelped and hung up when i turned on my camera :(
Suga: hinata
Suga: angel
Suga: carrottop
Suga: what are you wearing?
Hinata: well
Hinata: nithing?
Kenma :3: ah sho
Suga: ive collected all of them but hinara then im omw over
Suga: fyi this is yama texting
Kaashi <3: hes doung that thing
Kaashi <3: mom: keiji, can you text my friend “......?”
Kaashi <3: me: gimme a sex
Kenma :3: …
Shirabu: this is honestly just not akaashis day
Kaashi <3: i give up
Kaashi <3: yaku come kidnap me
Yaku: im outside
Tendou: so were all headed to “gay asses beach?”
Suga: yep
Oikawa: mhm
Yaku: yep
Tendou: grt
Tendou: c u all soon ig
Hinata: i think im in love bro
Noya: bro <3
Hinata: <3