Chapter Text
Why he brought Nathalie along to the damned PTA meetings was something she would ruefully ponder for the rest of time. It wasn’t as if she actually contributed. She just sat there eating snacks out of her purse and tuning everyone out with her earbuds.
There were always a couple of younger children who the women couldn’t find babysitters for, that ended up sulking with her at the back of the room, begging to play on her phone.
Which… no.
She did feed them though. She’d tried what their mothers cooked and, yeah they deserved some mercy for that.
Meanwhile Gabriel spent his time fighting with the PTA president and trying to ignore flirty married women. It would have been funny if she didn’t have to sit through three hours of it a week.
By the time they arrived at the mansion she was ready to crawl in bed and sleep for the rest… of ever… for all time.
“Gabriel that was the most terrible thing I’ve ever endured,” Nathalie complained, plunking heavily on the sofa and motioning with her cane for emphasis. They’d given up on the crutches thing, she was too bad at using them.
“Yes,” he nodded fervently. “The audacity of some of those women, hanging off of me as if they aren’t VERY married.”
“And you’re not even charming during those meetings,” she agreed. “You’re a total dick!”
“Rude,” he muttered as if she wasn’t entirely accurate. Which she was. Then a glint sparkled in his eyes and Nathalie wondered how fast she could run from the room with a cane and frustratingly weak legs.
“Nathalie-”
“Whatever it is, no.”
“You should date me.”
The fuck? “What?”
“We should date,” he repeated as if that clarified anything.
“What- you have been nothing if not devoted to your wife for the entire time I’ve known you.” Nathalie sputtered.
“Yes.”
“And I have been nothing if not fruity for the entire time you’ve known me.”
“Fruity?”
“Ah, sorry, I’ve been talking too much with Adrien. It’s slang for queer.”
“Is Adrien using a lot of queer slang?” Gabriel asked with a raised eyebrow.
“That’s not important,” Nathalie deflected.
“I feel like it’s maybe important.”
“ANYWAY, why do you think we should date?”
“Oh,” Gabriel said, getting back on topic, “If everyone thinks we’re dating, maybe the PTA ladies will leave me alone.”
Nathalie sighed, “If they are so ready to disregard their own relationships why do you think they’d respect yours?”
He looked at her like she had just said the dumbest sentence possibly conceived, “Because you’re scary.”
“So you’re trading several mean white ladies for one.”
“You’re half Persian.”
“Gabriel, the way that is so ridiculously not the point right now.”
He held his hands up. “Please.”
Nathalie resisted the urge to groan. “The press are going to be unbearable about this.”
He brightened at her implied surrender, “PR can deal with that.”
She gave an imperceptible sigh and muttered, “Not well, probably.”
**************
Their first plan for “dating” was to go on a date. Publicly. Not work related.
Which Adrien was thrilled to help plan.
“You know I’m not actually going on a date with her, right?” Gabriel asked his son as Adrien rifled through his father’s sketches for an outfit for her.
“Yeah, but Nathalie is my real dad so if you go and sparks happen to fly I get her as an actual legal parent so this has to be perfect.”
“Thank you for talking about me as if I’m not here,” Nathalie said drily
“Also she can legally adopt you without us being married,” the older man added.
Adrien’s eyes widened, “And WHY didn’t we do that years ago?”
“Oh look, an age appropriate, classy outfit.” Nathalie said loudly.
Both Agrestes peered at the sketch.
“Nathalie, do you have a phobia of people seeing your neck?” Adrien asked
“Yes, and it’s crippling.” she answered, staring into the middle distance.
“I like it- the outfit,” Gabriel stated awkwardly.
“You did design it.” Nathalie said, motioning to the signature beneath the raspberry blouse and merlot velvet trousers.
They ordered the outfit from the archives and plotted a place to go.
Apparently bookstores were not popular date locations for rich men. Nathalie thought it had been an excellent idea. You can tell a lot about a person by what books they read.
Though she probably already knew way too much about Gabriel for both an assistant and fake girlfriend.
They settled on an expensive restaurant Nathalie never would have dreamed of going to. The food looked amazing, and they promised to bring Adrien next time. Well, Nathalie aggressively hinted at it and Gabriel reluctantly promised. Baby steps.
So all that was left was the worst bit. Actually going.
If they had actually been dating they probably would have spent the evening sitting next to each other on the couch, her reading, him sketching, never talking to each other. Because that’s what they always did. Unfortunately, this was to spite women who focused their existential dread on the school PTA and flirting with a rich man, so they had to leave the house.
Adrien was bouncing on his heels when that fateful Friday evening came.
Gabriel, for all it had been his idea, looked as reluctant as she likely did.
“You look very nice,” he offered as they gathered together before the threshold.
“Thank you,” she said, adjusting the white lace cuffs of her sleeves. “As do you.”
“You guys are cute,” Adrien said, exiting the dining room.
“Still not a real date,” Nathalie felt the need to clarify.
“Maybe I’m just complimenting the appearances of my parent who loves me and also father.”
“Good save. I’ll take it,” she shrugged.
“I DO love you!” Gabriel sputtered indignantly.
“I know,” Adrien said, “You’re just really bad at it. Have fun you guys!” he waved.
“I need to sort that out,” Gabriel muttered as they slipped out the door.
“As I’ve said. Multiple times. Are we taking the car?”
“I thought we could walk,” he answered. “It’s close enough, and we may as well be seen together.”
She took his arm. “Lead the way then.”