Chapter Text
Chat was confused.
This wasn’t the mansion, nor was it the warmly lit living room of the one and only Tommy Danger Careful Kraken Innit XD.
They were somewhere else, somewhere different and new.
Somewhere open without any walls, floor, or high vaulted ceilings covered in wooden beams or sparkly chandeliers. It was outside! They were outside in a big field covered in green grass and a bunch of flowers. The sky was blue. The sun was bright and high in the sky, a few fluffy white clouds drifting on by above and brushing against its golden glow. There were all sorts of sounds coming from all over the place. Birds, bugs, wind, the rustling of the long grass and the cry of a distant loon.
Tommy barely bit back a laugh when he saw the messages whizz past on the screen.
Where are we?! hello?!
Is this heaven?
HELLO?
i like the flowers~
how are we outside when the concept of inside is but a fabrication of a falsified reality, the concept of “in” and “out” being mere byproducts of an even greater struggle, that of man’s desperation to control the world and bend the unstoppable power of nature to their will?
also where are we so short?
He snickered. “Hang on, Chat. I’ll show ya in a sec.”
Chat awaited whatever the boy had planned for them with virtual baited breath. Tommy wasn’t actually sure if this thing was able to breathe or not. Probably not, considering it was a robot and also powered by god magic, as well as whatever kind of fucked up science shit Tubbo put into it.
He stepped in front of the construct, knelt down on the grass, and held a small hand mirror up for all to see.
Chat went crazy the second they saw what it was they were currently inhabiting.
YOOOOOOOOOO WHAT THE HEEEEEEECK
we a robit! Beep boop!
omg we are so smol
We hAVE A SWEA TE R
TOMMY HELLO
The hearts! The hearts!!!
why are ,,,, we so,,,,scrunk?
where’s Dad? Also POG we robot guy
hi!
helno !
Due to the growing popularity of their Twitch channel, Tommy and his family had been busy trying to come up with some new ideas to entertain their fans. A few cooking streams here and there were good, and gaming was always a fun time, but Tommy wanted to try something different. Something a bit more unexpected. Something unique .
The idea came simply enough: make a portable camera set-up that would allow him to walk around outside and read chat messages. But that was too simple, especially for a clever Big Man such as himself. He needed something with more pizazz, more umph and showmanship. What he needed was something that could help Chat feel more involved with the stream, something to boost that parasocial relationship thing that XD was always talking about for whatever reason. Tommy didn’t actually know what parasocial meant. But! If it meant getting them more subs and views, then how bad could it possibly be?
That’s when it hit him.
What better way to help chat feel involved in the streams than to give them a proper body? And not just any body, either, oh no no, this was a special body. It was an advanced, top-of-the-line, super complex and also very poggers body, one that was handcrafted by THE Tubbo Underscore Beloved himself, and one that was powered by the universe’s own mysterious magicks.
Also some double A batteries…and maybe a potato or two. Those were also there.
The robot itself was remarkably simple. It stood at about three feet and weighed little more than twenty or so pounds. It had two short arms and a pair of stubby legs, which ended in a couple of flat metal feet. Its head was a large television screen, atop of which sat a pair of long, twisty, bendy antennas, which were topped off by some bright yellow balls that had a squishy, rubbery texture. Michael had picked those two bits out. He said that it was to make the robot look more “friend-i-fied”, whatever on earth that was supposed to mean. Tommy thought they made the little bugger look awfully adorable.
It was wearing a bright blue sweater. Tommy had sewn it himself. He took great time and care into making sure it fit the robot’s metal torso right, making sure that the fabric wouldn’t get caught on any loose wiring or get tangled up in any screws. He had also stitched on a couple of pretty pink hearts onto the chest, which matched the flower sticker that occupied the screen’s lower left corner. The flower was Tubbo’s personal final touch.
“Couldn’t find any tulip stickers.” The boy had said with a sad shrug. “So I guess a daisy will have to do.”
Tommy had added a sticker of his own. A L’manburg flag, custom-made just for him. He stuck it up in the upper right corner for all the world to see, to remind everyone of where he came from and where a part of him would always remain, even beneath layers of ash and ruin.
Also, he just thought it would look cool. It did.
To top the whole thing off was the robot’s screen. Right now it displayed the various “awes!” and “pogs!” that came sailing through the chat, but as Tommy reached out and pressed a tiny button on the side, it switched.
“Behold: ya guys’ face.” Tommy chuckled at just how stupid and derpy the thing looked. That big ol’ mouth really did something to him, especially when contrasted with the display's tiny, tiny black eyes and enormous, wobbly grin.
It looked so derpy and stupid.
It was perfect.
He switched the screen back so he could see Chat’s reactions. They were about what he expected. Lots of chaos. Lots of ‘awes.’
Predictable little buggers, weren’t they?
Tommy sighed and got to his feet. “You lot better appreciate this little thing.” He said while nodding down at Chat. “Tubbo and Dad worked hard on it, and I spent five hours thinking about where to put that bloody sticker. It was awful. Worst time of my life. Utterly devastating and greatly exhausting. I cried. Twice! Terrible day, never again. Ranboo was there for emotional support. So was Mi-”
“Mum- myyyy !”
He laughed softly as a tiny hoof tugged against the hem of his skirt. He looked down to smile at Michael, who was wearing a mint green sweater and a pair of black shorts that reached down to his knobbly little knees. The piglin snorted as he reached up and made grabby hands at him. Tommy cooed and quickly scooped him up.
“Hello love. What’s up?”
Michael snuggled close to his chest and babbled happily. “I wanted Mummy hugs!”
“Oh? Is that all?”
“Nope!”
“No?”
Michael shook his head. “Nope! Wanted Mummy hugs and cuddles. Yous was talkin’ to the robot though so I had to wait.” He threw his head back as he sighed dramatically. “But waiting is soooooooo haaaaaaard . So I not waiting now!”
Tommy snorted with laughter.
Chat tilted its head up, its screen now displaying one of the many emotes and facial expressions that he helped design. Tommy came up with the idea. Ranboo drew the various faces on that tablet of his, and Tubbo programmed them all in while he was working on the robot’s code. Add a bit of magic from XD to spice things up, and bada bing bada boom, you had yourself a robot that could change its face to match whatever the general “vibe” in chat was at any given moment.
Right now, the vibe seemed to involve lots of big red hearts that were covered in gold sparkles. Of course.
Tommy rolled his eyes and shook his head slightly at how stupidly adorable the thing looked. He squeezed Michael tightly and decided to focus on granting the boy his long overdue affection, his full attention turned on ensuring that there wasn’t a single inch of Michael’s head that went without a kiss.
Chat was enthralled. Though the blur of his heavily obscured vision, Tommy was able to catch a few brief glimpses of the messages rolling by on screen. He struggled not to scoff at how many ‘awes’ sailed by and assaulted his vision.
Some messages were a bit more bearable. Barely.
BABY BABY BABY BOI BABY BOY CHILD YES YES IT IS HE YES
I AM GOING TO SOBN
Thia is the cutest thing i’ve even fucking seen in my LIFE holy SHIT
I’m crying. I am actually crying.
MY HEEEEEEEEEART
HIIIIIIIIIM
MUMMY TOMMY MUMMY TOMMY MUMMY TOMMY PLEASE BE MY MOTHER WAIT THAT SOUNDED WEIRD FUCKNJ
he is,,,,motherinnit,,,,,yes
The messages continued to whizz by with no sign of stopping. Tommy rolled his eyes at the tiny robot, which kept looking up at him as he looked back down at Michael and gently nuzzled his cheek.
He chuckled as he moved to set the boy down. “Okay Mikey. Mummy has to put you down for a sec so I can talk to Chat and make sure they’re working properly. Be a good boy and stay close to me, alright? Don’t want you wandering off and gettin’ lost, now, do we?”
Michael let out a whine as soon as his hooves touched the floor. Tommy’s wings wilted at the sound of the poor baby’s pleas.
“But Mum- myyyy !” Michael cried while he stared up at him and gripped his skirt tightly. “I been wanting to play with you all week ! I waited and waited and waited for you to not be busy, but every time you came over or we went to your house, you’s been too busy with Papa and Dada to spend time with me! Today’s supposed to be you an’ me day, you spending it w’th the robot, and it’s not fair ! It’s not fair! Not fair at all !”
Michael’s tiny stomp of frustrated defiance was met with a wince from Tommy and an outcry from Chat. He watched from the corner of his eyes as the robot began to shake, its screen flashing between a series of emotes that ranged from a crying face, an angry snarl and a puppy with enormous, glittery eyes.
Chat’s messages reflected such a whirlwind of conflicting emotions.
BABY. IS. UPSETTY. HOLD HE AND FIX RIGHT THE HELL NOW OR I AM GOING TO CALL THE COPS
Michael pleas don’t cry my poor heart cannot take it
You,,,,are,,,,,a cruel and,,,,unloving mother,,,,,neglecting your son like this!!!! ,,,,shameful
PICK HIM UP RIGHT THE FUCK NOW AND KISS HIS LITTLE HEAD. OR SO HELP ME ENDER I WILL BLOW THIS WHOLE STREAM UP(/j twitch pls don’t ban me)
The boy is in DISTRESSSSSSSSSSS this is AWFUL and CRUEL and I am going to PUKE
hold he. hold the boyo.
HES UPSET YOU BASTARD!!! HOW DA R E YOU LAUGH?!!!?
Brb gonna call CPS /hj
this is the most emotion I’ve felt since middle school wtf
Im in tears please lord someone help the poor baby :(
Life is cruel but Tommyinnit is even crueler.
Tommy hated himself for laughing. Really, he did. He genuinely felt awful for giggling at Michael and Chat’s states of emotional disarray, but could you really blame him? This was ridiculous! Gods, how the fuck was he meant to test out the robot when both it and his nephew were throwing a couple of fits?
Tubbo and Ranboo really did not pay him enough for this kind of thing. Not that he needed payment to spend time with Michael, obviously. But it sure as hell would be nice to be compensated for the emotional toil this situation was bringing onto him, however little that may actually be.
It wasn’t very much.
Quickly pulling himself together and putting on a calm-ish demeanor, Tommy looked and smiled down at Michael as gently as he was able. He placed a hand on the boy’s head, kneeled down on the grass, and spoke in a soft, tender whisper that probably wouldn’t be picked up by Chat.
He fought back the urge to coo as Michael sniffled and looked up at him with a wide, tearful eye.
“Mikey…” Tommy said sweetly. “Are you okay, chickadee?”
Michael sniffled again and shook his head as he rubbed his tiny, snotty snout against Tommy’s sweater sleeve. Tommy would have to hand wash the mess out later when they got home. That was fine.
“No!” Michael whined after a few more soft snort-sniffs. “I not! I not otay, Mummy, I not otay and I ain’t gonna be otay until you finally play w’th me like you promised!” With that he tossed his head back and let out a long, drawn-out and far too adorable to be reasonable whine that made Tommy’s heart break clean down the middle. Tommy kept up his smile as he quailed softly in the back of his throat, the sound a low warble reminiscent of a dove’s coo.
He carefully cupped the side of Michael’s face and wiped away a couple of tears. “Mikey, baby, I promise that I’m gonna play with you. I just need to check a few things with Chat before we can get started. You can help, if you want! Does that sound fun, sweetie?”
Tommy tilted his head as he waited for an answer.
Michael gave one last sniff before blinking away a final tear. He nodded weakly and nuzzled into Tommy’s hand, his own tiny hooves gripping the blonde’s fingers with a surprising amount of strength.
He answered with a quiet snort. “Otay Mummy…I help.”
Tommy beamed and quickly got to his feet. “Good!” He chirped while keeping his back bent so he could keep holding Michael’s hand. “Then let’s get this over with so we can get to playtime, okay? Come along now, love.”
A smile formed on Michael’s face the moment Tommy said that. The tiny piglin’s mood took a turn back towards his typical childish joy. Tommy laughed as he picked up the pace and trotted back towards the robot, urging Tommy to “hurry up and keep goin’!” as he pulled him along.
Tommy couldn’t help but wonder if Michael’s ability to rapidly switch between tearful distress and joyful giggles was something he picked up from Tubbo. Something about that thought made his chest hurt, so he shoved it away to deal with later.
Chat turned its head to look at them as soon as they arrived. The robot had been programmed to walk away whenever it sensed that something private was going on, something that wouldn’t be too good to have streamed live on Twitch. Stuff like panic attacks, breakdowns, sudden fits of crying. Shit like that. Michael having a little fit wasn’t too bad, but Tommy was grateful that Tubbo had bothered to add that kind of feature in. They’d all learned their lesson from Ranboo’s bread-making stream a little while back.
Another feature was that once it had walked away from whatever was going on, the robot would cover its “ears”, AKA put its tiny gray hands on the side of its television head. It would do that while closing its eyes, which were currently scrunched up tightly on the screen, indicating that Chat could not see nor hear what was happening.
Tommy pressed a button to turn the robot back to its default state. The two yellow orbs on its antennas lit up briefly, and after a moment its hands dropped back to its sides as its eyes popped back open and its face returned to normal.
Chat looked up at him and immediately started screaming.
What. the heck. Just happened.
WHERE WERE YOU WE WERE BL IN D AND COULD NOT HEAR
lmao! I thought my headphones were busted. Hi again! :D
is michael okay? :(( hellooo babey are you alright? You are,,,,so very smol….
And we’re back! :D what just happened I am very confused
Michael giggled at the screen. He seemed awful interested in the pretty colors and colorful text Tubbo had selected for the chatbox, which ranged in hue from some dark blues to a delicate shade of pinkish lilac, all of which stood out on a dark gray background that was surrounded by a flowery frame. Tommy had designed the chat box border himself. XD said he was very good at drawing flowers. Tommy was too flustered to dignify them with a response. Not that you’d hear that from him directly, of course.
Tommy chuckled as Michael gently poked Chat’s face. He waited for them to calm down before offering a decently vague enough explanation.
“Sorry ‘bout that, fellas!” He said while patting the robot’s head. “Mikey needed a sec to cool off and chill. He’s fine now, though, so don’t worry about it too much, alright?”
Chat seemed hesitant at first, but eventually they settled and allowed him to continue without much trouble. Tommy nodded at the robot as he straightened his back and put his hands on his hips. “Alrighty then! Let’s get started and test out what this little doodad can do.”
Chat eagerly awaited whatever it was Tommy had planned. Michael clapped his hands together and giggled with excitement. Tomm turned away and took a few steps forward, enough so that about five or six feet separated him, the robot, and his little golden apple.
He turned back with a grin as the wind brushed against his wings and blew right into his eyes.
There was a nice breeze at the moment. A good, cool crisp one, one that flowed over the field like water over a swallowed riverbed that carried with it the scent of peonies and poppies. The perfect breeze for a day out of the house with Michael and the perfect breeze for a bit of flying.
An excited shiver ran through his feathers at that last thought. Tommy straightened up more as he cupped his hands around his mouth and called out to the tiny machine.
“Oi! Little fella!”
The robot looked back at him with an expectant yet goofy smile. Its face turned away from Michael as its antenna lit up, a sign that it was ready to follow whatever command was issued.
Tommy called again. “C’mere and walk over to me, okay? Nice and steady, not too fast but not very slow, either, Medium speed.”
He lowered his hands and waited to see what the robot would do. It stood there for a few seconds, its screen flicking over to a gray box with a few dots that went around in a circle. It waited for a bit before turning back to the face, at which point its legs began to move as it took its first few steps forward.
Tommy beamed. He threw his hands into the air and cheered with victorious triumph. “Frick yeah!”
Michael gasped and went wide-eyed as the robot moved. He followed it quickly, little hooves trotting across the grass as he paced himself so that he and Chat walked side by side in perfect unison. He giggled when the robot looked at him, and then full on laughed as its screen switched over to a playful smile with its tongue sticking out.
Michael’s happy, babbling laughter carried over the field and hills as he rushed to keep up. Tommy would give anything to see that look of innocent, childish wonder on the boy’s face every single day. The mere thought of it filled his heart with a tender, gentle warmth.
He held onto the feeling as Chat came to a halt directly in front of him.
“Ayup chat!” He chimed as he bent his knees and smiled down at the tiny machine
They tilted their head up, looked him dead in the eyes, and one their screen said one thing and one thing only.
OI, WE WALKIN’ HERE!
Tommy stifled his laughter as Michael ran up and hugged his leg.
The boy’s arms wrapped around him and squeezed him so tightly he was honestly somewhat frightened. Since when was Michael so damn strong? What the fuck were Tubbo and Ranboo feeding him?!
Michael hugged Tommy’s leg even tighter as he quickly asked a very important question.
“Mummy play now?”
Michael looked up at him hopefully and tilted his head. His little snout wiggled as his eyelash fluttered like a butterfly’s wing. Chat also looked up at Tommy, the messages whizzing by at an almost break-neck pace.
Play with the boyo!
Mikey wants to play! Pls pls pls PLS play w/ mikey
dont deny the boy his wish. what are you? a monster?
Can you say happy birthday to my best friend Izzy?
PLAYTIME WITHJN THE BOI
Tommy sighed. He submitted to the boy’s wishes while nodding slowly, fully preparing himself for how hard it was going to be to get through the mental check-list of things he had to test out while also entertaining his nephew. Not that he’d ever complain about the latter. Surely not.
He smiled softly down at the boy, whose eye lit up even brighter as he leaned down at pat his little head.
“Yes, sweetie. We can play now.”
Both Michael and Chat cheered. Tommy chuckled as both the baby piglin and the child-sized robot threw their fists into the air and celebrated their victory, then he crossed his arms and shook his head while letting out a sigh.
Hopefully, with enough patience and creativity on his part, he’d be able to make testing the robot into a game of sorts to keep Michael content.
Turns out, that was actually much easier than he expected.
“Okay, now three…two…one… jump !”
Both Michael and Chat did a small hop together in near-perfect unison. Tommy held his breath as he watched the boy and robot jump across the tiny gap that lay before them, and then let it out in a burst of happy laughter when the both landed without a hitch on the other side.
He clapped his hands and cheered while Michael ran up to him. “Yeah! Whoo, you did it!”
Michael giggled as he hugged the blonde teen’s leg. Chat also toddled over to meet him, their face a big smile as they stopped at Tommy’s side and waited for their next command. Tommy leaned down to pick Michael up so he could give the boy a kiss on the cheek.
“I did it, Mummy!” Michael cried brightly while throwing his hands into the air. His tiny tail waggled as his chest puffed out and his snout wiggled.
“You did it!” Tommy confirmed with a small nod. “You both did very good, Mikey. I’m very proud of you.”
Michael giggled as another kiss was pressed onto his forehead. Chat’s screen changed to a heart-eyed face that looked like it was on the verge of tears. Tommy chuckled at both of them while he gently set Michael down.
“Okay, let’s see…”
He stood back up straight and took a look around. A good few hours had passed since they started. Most of that time was spent simply wandering around the SMP, mostly sticking to the open fields and empty pathways that weren’t too busy around this time of day. Tommy used all of that time wandering about to test the chatbot’s various features, most of which involved its walking speed and capacity for movement.
First he checked how fast it could go.
Then he had it walk over some dirt and gravel to see how it could handle rougher terrain.
Then he made sure it was able to see in the dark by wandering into a small cave next to some old builds. There weren’t any monsters inside, but Michael did get spooked when a small bat decided to swoop by and say hello. Tommy had to send Chat away again so he could calm the poor thing down.
After that they ran a few more tests. Simple stuff, really, most of which wasn’t too difficult to deal with. The most trouble they had was with getting Chat’s text-to-speech feature to turn off when they got around to testing it. It worked fine for alerts or donations, but having it set to read the entire chat all at once was a surefire way of getting both Tommy and Michael a splitting headache.
He could still hear the cacophony of text-to-speed madness. Oh…oh gods , could he hear it.
It wasn’t long before they got around to testing the parkour capabilities. Tubbo had been very adamant about adding some proper hydraulics into the bot’s legs. He even wanted to give it a jetpack of sorts at one point, but XD had turned the concept down in favor of a solution that wouldn’t give Tubbo access to anything explosive or flammable.
Tubbo hadn’t been too pleased with that.
Tommy still smelled a bit like smoke when the goat hybrid had curled against his chest and demanded to be cuddled so he could pout in peace.
The thought caused a smile to tug at Tommy’s lips as he surveyed the surrounding area. He was stood in the middle of a field of grass, one littered with the scattered remains of what was probably a tower or castle wall at some point. The gray bits of stone lay messily around him, each on bleached white by the sun in some places and caked in mud in others. Moss, vines, ivy and even some brownish mushrooms covered the weathered wreckage.
He clicked his tongue and gave a contemplative hum. “Hmmm…supposed we could find some water to dunk you fellas in, yeah?”
He turned his head to look down at Chat, who looked back up to him with a unsure frowny face appearing on their screen. Tommy hummed again before giving a small nod.
“Yeah. Probably not. You guys are supposed to be waterproof, but that kinda thing’s only meant for rain. And it sure as heck doesn’t seem like it’s gonna be doing that anytime soon.”
Chat and Michael both nodded as Tommy looked up and held a hand to the sky. He was just about to speak when he felt a tug on his ankle-length poodle skirt(which was an olive green with a bluish tint and a big brown cow sewn onto the front), the feeling of which caused him to look down and be met with Michael’s curious silver eye.
“Mummy?” The boy said, voice small and soft over the wind that blew gently around them.
“Yeah, hunnie?” Tommy asked while he turned to face the child. “What’s up?”
Michael looked down slightly and gave Tommy’s skirt a tiny squeeze. “Can we…can we have a picnic, maybe?”
Tommy blinked, slightly surprised by the request but not at all opposed to the idea. Chat’s antennas perked up as they watched Tommy leaned down a bit to better meet Michael’s gaze.
“You wanna have a picnic?” He asked quietly. His hand came up to cup the side of Michael’s face, the touch soft and caring as his clawed fingers brushed against bright pink skin and caressed the boy’s cheek.
Michael nodded and leaned into the hand. “Mhm…think it would be fun…”
“Okay.” Tommy stood up again and offered Michael his hand. “We can do that. I’ve got my backpack on me, so I’m sure I can pull something nice out of it for us to use. Chat? Do you do the picnic or not? I’ll just end stream if n-”
Chat did not want to end the stream. Not at all. No, the mere thought of such a thing was enough to send them into a total frenzy, one so intense that Tommy couldn’t help but laugh as the small bot spun around and hurried to meet him.
The screen was a mess.
DONT DONT DONT DONT DONT ONT DONT DONT
We wanna do picnic! Please!
Picnic time :D
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaait dont end plz, i’m not done wth my dinner and don’t wanna eat alone :(
NO!
nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
*chanting* Picnic! Picnic! Picnic! Picnic!
Tommy snorted and shook his head at them. “Alright, alright, calm down. Let’s go find a good spot, okay?”
Both Michael and Chat beamed and nodded eagerly.
It wasn’t long before they found the perfect spot. It was a nice patch of grass a little ways away from the Holy Land, which could be seen past some rolling hills and messy plots of land that surrounded the sacred spot. Their blanket was spread out beneath a shady old oak tree. Tommy had pulled it out of his backpack without much thought, meaning he was rather surprised when he remembered that not everyone had a magical backpack that could spit out anything their heart desired, something that he tried and failed to explain to the curious and awestruck crowd.
“It’s uh…it’s a really rare enchantment?” He tried.
Chat just stared at him with a blank, unamused face.
Tommy wrinkled his nose at them and childishly stuck out his tongue. Chat returned the gesture while Michael helped with the cream puffs Tommy had pulled from the pack a few moments prior, all of which were round and adorned with a ruby red strawberry that sat upon a throne of sugary white goodness. Tommy had also fished out some sliced mangos and a few watermelon chunks, as well as a bowl of baby carrots to help make sure that Michael had something healthy to go with all that sugar.
Chat sat next to him on the blanket as he and Michael started their little picnic lunch. Tommy decided to take this opportunity to answer a few questions, most of which were rather innocent and not too hard to get through.
What kind of fruit do you like, Mister Innit?
“Strawberries!” Tommy answered while holding up a half-eaten cream puff. “They’re red, they’re sweet, they go well with cakes and pies. They’re also very good for eating when you feel like crap and need to have something sweet to brighten the mood.”
Do you like blueberries?
“Yeah, they’re okay. Kinda sweet, kinda sour, some more than others. Ranboo and I actually made some muffins with a batch we picked ourselves the other day. Was pretty fun!”
Michael snorted in agreement around a mouthful of mangos. Tommy chuckled and passed him a napkin.
Chat asked a few more questions.
Do you like reading?
“Yeah, I do. Don’t do it much, though. Too hard to focus when I’ve got other stuff goin’ on.”
Do you write? Either OG works or for fanfic?
“Erm, no. Not really…”
What’s ur fav movie :)
“Either Howl’s Moving Castle or Avengers: Endgame.”
know any riddles?
“What am I, a sphinx?”
MISTER INNIT HI HELLO VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION BUT WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR HAIR DONE PLZ PLZ I NEED TO KNOW IS VV IMPORTANT
“My Dad.”
where’s tubbo and Mr. Boo?
Tommy laughed when he read that one. “Oh, they’re back home, in Snowchester.” He leaned back a bit and couldn’t help but snicker softly before he sighed and slowly shook his head. “They’re probably throwing a fit over me not being there. Dad had to step up and hold them back just so Mikey and I could leave the mansion and come out here.”
The eyes on Chat’s face blinked in surprise at such news. The screen quickly flickered back to the messages, all of which were questions regarding the apparent emotional distress that Tubbo and Ranboo were likely undergoing.
Michael gave a grumpy snort as Tommy looked a couple over.
“Dada and Papa are greedy.” He said in a matter-of-fact tone.
Both Tommy and the robot looked at him with matching looks of confusion. Tommy’s was a small frown and a quirked brow. Chat’s was a flat mouth that was accompanied by a raised eyebrow and wide, curious pupils.
Tommy tilted his head a bit as he asked Michael to elaborate on such an odd statement. “What do you mean by that exactly, Mikey?”
Michael answered with a tiny huff. “I meeeeean that you are always so busy with Papa and Dada that you don’t have time for just you and meeeeee !” He crossed his arms and turned away a bit, eye narrowed into a grumpy slit that matched his annoyed grunt.
“But I always try to make time for you, Michael sweetie.” Tommy scooted over a bit so that he was closer to the pouty piglin, enough so he could reach down to hold his face with one hand and assure him softly. “I’m sorry you feel like I’m always busy, sweetie. Is there anything I can do to make it better?”
Michael only frowned more while he sank down and grumbled quietly. “‘S not Mummy’s fault…”
Tommy blinked and felt Chat perk up to look over his shoulder. From the corner of his eyes he could make out a few messages. Most were either about how adorable Michael was being(which was fair since he was quite precious, even when pouty), but a few seemed genuinely concerned about the boy’s well-being and happiness.
Tommy felt his wings drop slightly as he turned his full attention back onto Michael.
“Who’s fault is it, then?” He asked with genuine curiosity.
Michael answered with a flick of his ear and a short, angry snort.
“Papa an’ Dada.” He said while staring down a nearby dandelion. “They always hoggin’ you and keeping you all to themselves! ‘S not fair! Really really is not fair! I wanted to play w’th you yesterday, but Dada said you and him had to go out and buy more groceries . Then I wanted to watch some Owl House with you when you gots back, but then Papa came out and took you to the bedroom for private time . And then when it was time for dinner and I finally got to talk to you, they both showed up and took you to bed for cuddles and sleep !”
Michael threw his tiny hooves up into the air and gasped with frustration at the whole ordeal. Tommy was just about to apologize for causing the poor dear such distress, but oh no, Michael wasn’t done yet!
He quickly realized as such when Michael sucked in a deep breath and continued with growing intensity.
“Papa and Dada always get you first . They always get to hug you and play with you, always get to go outside and pick all the pretty flowers . I wanna do that stuff with just us! Just Mummy and me and nobody else, but nooooooooo , Dada says we gotta share and take turns .”
“He said what now?” Tommy asked, both too stunned and confused to process anything else.
“He a hippopotamus , Mummy!” Michael said as he whipped his head around and glared up at the dazed blonde with the fury of a thousand Nether lakes. “He say that kinda thing all the tiiiiime , but when it’s time for my Mummy time, he’s always like ‘no Mikey, Mummy and I gotta go do this’, “no Mike, not quite yet, I need to give Mummy this flower’, ‘just a minute, Mikey. Papa and Dada need to take Mummy out all day long for hours and hours and hours and hours ! Then we gotta come home and cuddle him all the time while you just sit around and play with Grandpa and not Mummy .’ It’s not fair! It is not fair! It is not right! It is not fair at all , and I am frickin’ tired of it!”
An exhausted sigh was the last noise he made before flopping backwards and laying on his back. Tommy didn’t even have time to take all of that in before Chat inched over and stared him right in the face, their screen abuzz with a whole plethora of questions.
None of them were the kind Tommy was equipped to answer.
What the FUCK did I just witness?
Michael…honey…are you okay?
Is he crying or just really dramatic. I /gen cannot tell.
private time?
WTF is “private time?”
Mikey baby what have u seen what horrors have u beheld with you big ol eye and sweet lil face child plz tell me pls I wish to provide aid
Are you guys all married or what? I thought u were Mike’s uncle. I am,,,,,confused.
PRIVATE TIME WHAJNJVNDDBD
this took a turn. not for the worst. It just turned, and now we are here.
I have,,,,,,so many questions. I am unsure whether or not I am prepared for the answers. This is,,,,,,,,an ordeal!
WTH IS PRIVATE TIME?!?!
did he mean hypocrite instead of hippopotamus?
Tommy ignored the robot’s rapid beeps and boops in favor of focusing on Michael. The boy looked fine, not sad or upset or anything. Well, no. He did look sad. Just not in the way that would mean Tommy had to end the stream and get him back home to the mansion for the TLC and lots of cuddles, as well as a few harmless scoldings from his two beloved fathers, who would normally murder anyone who dared make their son cry, but who spared Tommy from any such treatment.
He frowned as he reached down and scooped Michael up. “Michael?”
The boy sniffled softly in response. Tommy’s heart ached so much that he couldn’t help but coo as he hugged him close to his chest and covered him with his wings. A tiny hooved hand came up and grabbed his gently.
“Just wanna spend time w’th Mummy…” He whispered in a voice that so sweet and small and precious that it hurt just to think about.
Tommy just about broke down sobbing right then and there.
“Alright, sweetpea.” He said with a small sniffle of his own. “We can do that. I’ll tell Papa and Dada to step off a bit so we can play together more, alright?”
Michael’s face changed in an instant. In one moment it was a tearful frown and pleading pout, in the other a happy smile free from even a trace of sadness. Tommy wondered for a second if he’d just been duped by a toddler of all things, found he didn’t care if that was the case, and laughed brightly while he peppered the now giggly boy’s head with a dozen tiny kisses.
They both laughed happily while Chat continued to spiral.
Things went by smoothly after that. Once Tommy managed to convince Chat that he hadn’t been doing “sussy shit” with his friends(whatever that meant), he and Michael got to work making some flower crowns.
His was made of buttercups and white daisies.
Michael’s was woven with bright pink tulips and a few strands of pale blue periwinkle, as well as a couple forget-me-nots he’d gathered from over by a nearby tree.
“‘Cause they Dada’s flowers!” He explained while weaving the blue blooms into his tiny crown. “And the tulips are for Papa, because they’re his favorites!”
“Ahhh, I see, I see.” Tommy nodded his head in understanding while making his own floral head ornament. He plucked a fresh daisy from nearby as he paused to tilt his head. “Does your crown have any of your favorite flowers?”
Michael paused for a moment to meditate on the question.
“Nope!”
Tommy snorted and cocked his head further to the side. “Why not?”
Michael answered with a tilt of his chin. “‘Cause all the flowers are my favorite, Mummy! Can’t just pick one!”
“Ah, I see.” Tommy said with a thin, knowing smile. “Then I suppose you wouldn’t mind if I went ahead and had myself a couple extra of these buttercups, right?”
Michael set his crown down and stared at him. His ears went flat against his head as his eye blew wide, the sight of which was enough to get Tommy going even before he heard the little piglin speak. It tipped him over the edge when he did.
“Mummy won’t.” Michael said in a tone of voice that was almost(but also not at all) dangerous. “Mummy won’t. Mummy wouldn’t. Mummy would not dare .”
“Oh?” Tommy reached down to pluck a tiny yellow bud that grew next to the blanket.
Michael all but yelped as he jumped forward to stop him. “MUMMY WAIT, WAIT WAIT WAIT, SAVE SOME FOR ME, PLEASE!”
Tommy laughed and quickly handed Michael the flower. Michael snatched it out of his hand without a second thought, holding it close and tight to his chest as though it were a precious jewel or his last netherrite scrap.
His snout wiggled a bit as he stared the avian down.
“ Greedy Mummy.” He whispered darkly.
“Naw, I’m sorry.” Tommy apologized while offering the boy a few more buttercups along with some daisies. Michael took them all and was soon back to his typical smiley self, happy as a bee in spring as he giggled and got back to weaving.
Chat also got a crown. Theirs was a fusion of many blooms, chief among which was bluish-gray aster, a flower that Michael became fond of the second he laid eye on it. Tommy also rather liked it and helped him gather a few. They also picked some red poppies and a couple of medium-sized white lilies, all of which sat neaty upon the robot’s rectangular head by the time they packed up and went to head back home.
Michael squirmed happily in Tommy’s arms when they finally reached the mansion.
“We home!” He called out into the decadent interior, his small voice surprisingly loud in the grand foyer, with its marble tiles and glistening chandelier.
Footsteps came from around the top of one of the large staircases that led to the upper floor. A gentle smile formed on Tommy’s face the second Ranboo and Tubbo rounded the corner. They both smiled back the second they saw him.
“Tommy! Mikey!” Tubbo cried. He started down the stairs quickly and rushed over to meet the two.
“⏁⍀⟒⏃⌇⎍⍀⟒ ⏃⋏⎅ ⏚⏃⏚⊬!” Ranboo warbled while following quickly behind.
Tommy laughed as they both ran up and hugged him tightly. “Hahaha! Hullo, fellas. Miss me?”
He didn’t even bother to fight back as they both nodded quickly and cuddled him even closer. Next to him, Chat watched the scene play out with a large red heart on their screen, one that pulsed and beat in tune with the way they shifted from one foot to the other in eager anticipation.
Tommy chuckled while he leaned down to turn the stream off.
“See you later, fellas!’
Chat said their goodbyes just before the screen went dark.
Bye!
Goodbye!
Later :)
awe it’s over :( sadge
bye bye!
nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
End of Stream