Chapter Text
Driving was something she didn’t really enjoy.
Specially not in these conditions.
When the trip included some pleasant destinations, friends, almost lonely roads flanked by incredible landscapes, and her favorite music coming out loud through the speakers, she could sort of enjoy it.
But when it was like this, rain, in the midst of this city’s chaotic streets that happened to worsen whenever a storm was involved, with no other certainty than the route marked by the application of her cell phone with that blue line, and with the nervousness of knowing the purpose of her trip, it represented a true torture, except the only silver lining that had come out of all this madness, Juliana.
And although on this occasion her questions about the modern city that was as much hers as it was hers at such different times lacked emotion and astonishment due to the circumstances surrounding them, it was still comforting to know she was right there, sitting
next to her, blushing every time she caught Valentina looking at her.
Her heart was back to its normal pace, but the overwhelming pain she had experienced in that dream kept finding its way back to her memory, nesting in her chest, forcing her to look to her side from time to time and make sure Juliana was there.
And as comforting as it was finding the girl there, it still hurt to remember Great-grandmother Rebeca never had that privilege ever again.
“Val?” called Juliana, recapturing her attention.
“Yeah?”
"You haven't told me where we're going.”
"To Barbara's house,"
Juliana's expression changed to one of surprise.
“The witch?”
“Yes”
“Did your uncle send you a text? Did they find anything else?
“No, nothing new.”
“So, we’re only going to meet with her? No Camilo?”
“That's right. I don't think my uncle can really help this this” She explained “from the interaction we saw yesterday, it looks like it's not something he believes in.”
"And what are we doing then?"
Juliana’s face showed that she still couldn't understand the reason why they were visiting that woman.
“To keep our pact” she declared.
The other girl’s face showed the need for a deeper description of her plan.
She was sure Juliana understood what promise she was referring to, and that her doubts were more about what she had in mind for that.
“Do you remember yesterday's discussion between Camilo and Barbara?”
The raven-haired woman nodded, looking at her attentively.
“Well, in the middle of that argument, Barbara said she was able to do something that could be helpful”
“Something? What something?”
“She assured being able to establish a bridge of communication with people who had already died.”
Although she couldn't take her mind off the road, Valentina could feel Juliana's intense gaze on her.
“Val...”
“What?”
Juliana stayed silent, probably thinking about her next words. Yes, it was crazy, but at this point there didn’t have the privilege to be skeptical. They never had.
“Do you think it’ll work?”
Valentina left out a long sigh before answering.
"I don't know, but it's a good alternative." Their eyes met for a brief moment.
They both understood that it wasn't their best option, but the only one available.
“And what is going to happen or how is it going to be done?” asked Juliana, her voice sounding a little anxious now.
“Well... I’m not sure” she confessed. After all, her only source of knowledge was sci-fi films “uhm, I guess she'll use one of those crystal balls witches always have, summon my great-grandmother's soul, and if it turns out well, she'll take Barbara’s body to talk to us. To you.”
“Barbara’s body?”
“Yea, I think that’s what she means with ‘being the bridge’" she explained while turning the steering wheel to the right, following the GPS.
The vehicle remained submerged in the strangest of silences, while Valentina continued expertly driving through the streets and Juliana observing every detail of the exterior for several minutes.
“Val?”
Juliana’s voice cut through the calm.
This time the timbre of her voice was softer, hesitant even.
Was it weird that in such a short time reading Juliana's emotions had become so easy for her?
It wasn’t, right?
Spending practically 24 hours a day with someone was enough to know how to interpret their small gestures, right? That was completely normal, wasn't it?
“Yes?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure”
“When you woke up, earlier… ah, you uhm... that kiss, what… what was it? She finally managed to voice the question.
"I was happy to see you," she acknowledged, using the red light to gauge her reaction.
Of course she looked confused now.
Rising one eyebrow while looking at her was enough for Juliana to understand where this was coming from.
“Oh, did you see, did you see something? In your dream? Is that why you were crying?”
Valentina placed her hand on her chest. The remnants of that excruciating pain were still churning inside her body.
“Val?” insisted Juliana.
“Yes, Juls. It was the day that my great-grandmother found out about your accident. When she found out you had died.”
“Oh”
“And it was terrible.”
A lump in her throat prevented her from keeping talking, because she didn't even have to imagine the pain great-grandmother Rebeca felt when she heard about the love of her dying, she had experienced it, felt it.
Valentina knew what it was like to lose Juliana and it hurt, it hurt too much.
If it hadn't been for Juliana's soft touch drying the single tear rolling down her face, Valentina would’ve realized that she was crying.
"But I didn't die, Val," whispered Juliana, with a sweet voice, "I'm fine, I'm here." She reminded her, maintaining eye contact, and a thumb caressing her cheek.
"I know. And you can’t even imagine how happy that makes me"
Valentina closed her eyelids, savoring the feeling of Juliana stroking her cheek, touching her lips that parted a little with the soft contact.
As a result of her curiosity, Valentina opened her eyes and found Juliana staring at her mouth.
The brown-eyed girl must have felt watched, because just a second later she withdrew her hand and pulled away from her, putting an end to whatever was happening between them.
Valentina found herself feeling disappointed.
Before she had time to reflect on the sensations that Juliana's caresses and the intensity with which she looked at her mouth had aroused in her, the incessant noise of honks going off forced her to concentrate on getting to their initial destination, the witch's house.
The space was then filled once again with the noise of cars passing by and the hustle and bustle of a city that continued its course, oblivious to what was happening within the minds and hearts of the girls inside that car.
Then, Juliana dared to speak again.
"But for her, I died that day, didn't I?"
The question came without a preamble, and Valentina nodded in the same way, because she didn't need any clarification; she knew what she was referring to.
“And that's why we need to do this.”
That wasn't a question; it was more of a realization, a certainty, a decision.
"That's right”
"Okay, okay," she murmured, as she released the air inside her lungs, "then that's how it will be."
Both girls were terrified at the idea. Neither of them knew what they were getting into, or if they would succeed; the only thing they were more than convinced of, was that this was completely necessary.
***
When Valentina had decided that they would go to Camilo's friend, this was not what she imagined they would find there.
That house protected by a thick black gate, polished floors in the old style of the eighties, white walls with blue borders, and a huge garden full of colorful flowers, was, in her opinion, too... normal?
And not that she was expecting some kind of cave lit by candlelight, a shelf of steaming magic potions stacked on top of each other, or figurines of strange creatures hanging on the walls. But perhaps something that would make clearer who was supposed to live here, and why they had come to her.
Barbara had opened the door quite calmly, picked up the small blackboard that she had outside announcing her services, and then closed the entrance, sliding the thick latch inside, making clear business was closed for the day.
The woman led them down the long hallway adorned with hanging pots of well-kept succulents and other roots whose names she ignored, but she was sure Juliana could give her a full lecture on their benefits, if only her life was a little more normal than this.
Then again, if that were the case, Valentina wouldn't be in this place and she and Juliana would’ve never met.
Normal lives were boring anyway.
"This way," indicated the witch, stepping aside, clearing the entrance to the main room.
Juliana and Valentina appreciated the gesture and entered the room.
"Take a seat, please"
The girls accepted the invitation.
“Can I offer you something? Coffee? Water?”
“No thank you.”
They simultaneously declined.
"Okay,"
Barbara took the seat right across from them.
"So... to what do I owe your visit? Did Camilo mention anything?"
Valentina hadn’t been specific about the reason for her call, but something in Barbara's demeanor told her that finding her number on the screen had not been a surprise for the witch, and that she actually knew exactly why they were here right now.
"Uhm, we... need your help," answered Valentina, still wary of her own idea.
“For what?”
“Well, you, you said something, yesterday when you were arguing with my uncle. You commented that within your magical abilities or whatever, is the power to speak with the dead. Is… is that true?”
The witch did a poor job of hiding a smile.
"I don't talk with dead people, Valentina, I establish a connection between souls that are on two different planes, ours and the spiritual one," she clarified patiently.
Valentina kept silent because, in her mind, it sounded quite similar, only explained in a more mysterious way. However, she didn't want to be rude and jump to conclusions about something she considered herself ignorant about.
“But that's the same thing, isn't it? You just used fancier words.” Asserted Juliana.
Oh, wow. Beating around the bush wasn't her style, was it?
“Basically… but not practically” both girls showed similar gestures of confusion, letting the witch see that it was better to move on “Anyways, does this meeting have anything to do with your case?”
“Yes and no.”
It was Barbara’s turn to look puzzled, even if that expression was feigned.
"Would you mind explaining yourself?"
“of course. Look, you guys explained the energy portal that brought Juliana to this time, right?”
“We said… possibly” clarified the esoteric woman.
“Yeah, that… possibly she brought Juliana to this year” she corrected “And that the thing was created with the specific purpose of correcting fate’s mistakes, right?
“Precisely”
“Well, I've been thinking about it and I think the reason the portal opened at Yaya’s house it’s to make it possible Juliana and Great-grandmother Rebeca can finally talk.”
“Is there a reason why they need to?”
“Yes” confirmed Valentina.
Barbara focused on Juliana.
“What you wanted to tell Rebeca, is it important?” she asked.
The black-haired girl nodded.
“And are you both sure you want to do this?”
“Is it possible?” asked Juliana, visibly torn between moving forward or backing down.
"If you’re a hundred percent convinced that is what you want, and you understand what you are asking for, then yes, it is possible," assured the woman. "Are you?"
Juliana placed her eyes on Valentina’s, looking for her approval.
The other girl shrugged a little, reminding her that they had nothing to lose and a lot to win.
"Yes, I... I'm sure." Declared Juliana.
"And you, Valentina?
The blue-eyed woman felt confused for a moment. What did she have to do with all this? In her opinion, this was Juliana’s choice.
“Of course. I mean, Juliana's okay with it, so let's do it.”
"Okay," the woman announced, standing up, "come this way."
Juliana was the first to obey the enigmatic woman, followed by Valentina, who didn’t hesitate to take her hand and intertwine their fingers before coming after the witch.
She was nervous, okay? And she was the kind of person who found it reassuring to know that she wasn't alone, and feeling Juliana’s warm hand against her gave her the stability she needed right now.
Barbara led them down a hallway and curiosity led Valentina’s blue eyes to keep exploring her surroundings. A couple of bedrooms, the kitchen, dining room, bathroom, really nothing out of the ordinary.
She really needed to stop taking the movies as her source of information for this kind of stuff.
"Have a seat please," asked Barbara, placing herself in an exuberant wicker chair that was the most exotic thing Valentina had seen in the whole place.
For the rest of the scenery, they had a room with red brick columns, white walls with blue accents, plants adorning the corners; pictures of unknown people, surely relatives of the witch, and a small round table covered by a white tablecloth. On top of it there were three tall, white candles, matches, a strange object in the shape of a shiny black circle that reflected the light from outside, and an incense stick with a curious fragrance unknown to her.
"Sandalwood," announced Barbara, surprising Valentina. How did she know that-
"Okay, this woman is starting to make me nervous," whispered Valentina to her companion, without losing sight of the owner of the house.
“Only now?” said Juliana, with a hint of sarcasm in her voice.
“Sorry for forcing you to do this, Juls.”
"Val, you're not forcing me to do anything," she assured her, shaking her hand under the table, "you're right, this is our only chance."
"So far," added the brunette. Juliana frowned, not understanding her message, "if this doesn't work, then we'll find another way, okay?”
The sound of Barbara clearing her throat as she resumed her seat and lit the candles with the matches, achieved the purpose of regaining the attention of both young women.
“Alright, from now on, I need you to relax, breathe and open your mind to the possibilities that the psychic world offers. You must know that for the spirits, mind is everything, and shape is nothing” she started to explain “the type of evocation that we will carry out today, requires that the body in which the soul resides achieve the emancipation of its sensitive faculties to summon the thoughts and memories of the soul we expect to contact.
Valentina took a second to study Juliana, and from her expression, she realized that they were in the same place, not understanding a single word.
“You have probably noticed by now, from your personal experience, that the emancipation of the soul almost always takes place during sleep.”
What?
“And that these moments take a certain emotional and physical toll on the receptor’s body” added the witch, looking at the brunette as if waiting for her to confirm her statement
The truth is that Valentina was still as confused as she had been since a month ago “
“So, I'm not saying it's dangerous, just that it should be done with caution and at the right time.”
One of the biggest problems Valentina faced as a student, was how nervous she got when someone asked her something she didn't know. Every time it happened, she tended to ramble and interrupt her teacher to the point they always ended up a little upset with her.
It was to be imagined that, with the rhythm at which her heart was beating, the purpose of her visit to this place, and the strange behavior of the witch, her old habits would once again play tricks on her.
"Yes, uhm," she interrupted Barbara, unable to stop herself. "I, ah, Juls that she should have an idea of less what to say to my great-grandmother, because we don't know how long she'll be here and ah... right, Juls?”
Juliana ratified her statement nodding slightly.
The face of the woman in front of them, however, changed to one of total surprise upon hearing that.
“Not following you, Valentina.”
“Well, great-grandmother's soul comes and you are the... medium for that. I mean, like, if she’s gonna occupy your body, we don’t know for how long that will be, so she should… be fast about it or whatever.”
The witch's features mutated before her eyes, going from confusion to realization in a matter of seconds.
“Let me see if I understand correctly. So, you haven’t read the book?” she asked.
“My uncle's?”
“Yes”
“I’m almost finished.”
“But then”
Once again, her hostess' dark eyes locked with hers, searching for something, urging her to say anything, but Valentina had only silence to offer.
Barbara moved her head a little, focusing on Juliana, and she didn't have anything to say either.
"You know what? maybe we shouldn't do this," she announced after a big sigh. The youngest Carvajal was immediately alarmed “ maybe we should call Camilo and-”
"No, no... Barbara," interrupted Valentina, "please, we need to do this, okay? Really, it can't wait, you're... you're our only hope."
“But-”
"No. Listen to me, this is very, very important, for us, a lot and whatever you charge regularly for something like this, I swear I'll double it" she proposed.
Valentina felt desperate, although she did not understand why.
“It's not about money, it’s-”
“Barbara, please...”
With her plea, Valentina moved to the edge of her seat, placing the hand that wasn't holding Juliana's on the table.
The fire of one of the three candles that had been burning dimly, chose that moment to increase in intensity, creating a higher flame; and the other two flickered as if a gust of wind had crossed the room that had windows and doors closed.
The three women remained completely silent, with eyes focused on the candle, slowly returning to its normal size.
The first to disturb the silence was Juliana.
“What was that?” She whispered, more to herself.
And before Valentina could express the same doubt, the witch began hissing at ultrasonic speed.
The blue-eyed girl tried to pay attention to that strange prayer, catching just a few lines of it.
"You saw it... you saw it in the cards" she said "it has to be that way, you know it; it has to happen. You gotta trust. Spirits know the strength of the bodies. It won’t stay more than what is necessary.''
After a few moments that seemed to be an internal battle for reason, Barbara took her eyes off the flame to look at the other two women in the room; a gesture full of determination on her face.
"Okay," she announced, "we'll do it."
Valentina let the air out of her lungs and nodded twice, once to the witch and once to Juliana.
“Okay, okay... there’s... do we need to do something? Provide something? Questioned Valentina.
Barbara shifted to her seat before speaking.
“Normally, an object that belonged to the summoned soul can help to contact them, but something tells me that, this time, it won’t be necessary.”
Barbara fixed her gaze on Valentina’s with such intensity, that the girl didn’t know what to make out of it. She was torn between feeling relieved they had managed to convince her to help them, or scared about that look, the candles incident from seconds before, the words she had read in her uncle’s book, that kept floating inside her head, despite her efforts to forget them.
***
The hostess of the meeting took the three candles; placed them around the dark circle in the center of the table, trying to place the one that had been sparked minutes before in front of the Valentina, and resumed that speech she had left unfinished before.
She talked about opening the mind to new possibilities, connecting with the spiritual world to shape the appropriate 'atmosphere', concentrating on the person they were trying to bring here, in order to establish a link between all of them.
When she looked to the side, she found Juliana with her lips slightly parted, a deep frown, and eyes half-closed skeptically. She was not buying this, at all.
Then, the witch asked them to place their hands palms down on the table, fingers pointing toward their respective candles.
Juliana and Valentina followed the instruction, and when they instinctively copied the pace of each other's breathing, Barbara started to enunciate words in another language; something that sounded like Latin or another ancient language, repeating the phrase like a mantra relentlessly, until out of nowhere, that strange prayer stopped, the woman's dark eyes immediately sought the blackness of the shiny circle in the center of table.
For several seconds, no sound was heard, and Valentina was sure that the three of them were holding their breath, waiting for something; anything, but nothing happened.
As the seconds passed, with no lights turning on and off, the table rising into the air or objects in the room being thrown all over the place, Valentina let herself relax, loosening her shoulders as a sign of relaxation.
She thought of saying something, making some sound that would rise to the possibility of finding out if this had been a failure, but the idea left her mind the instant a singular sensation ran through her body, making her skin crawl from head to toe.
The flame of the three candles moved again, this time very subtly, as if a slight puff of air, a breath or a quick movement had stirred them.
Suddenly, Valentina started to feel weird.
It was as if the weight of fatigue from a whole week without sleep fell on her eyelids, to the point that keeping her eyes open was proving impossible.
“Val?” Juliana's voice helped her to regain her composure a little.
Valentina forced herself to lift her face in her direction, finding a certain restlessness there.
“Are you okay?” she inquired, again.
Despite being right next to her, Juliana’s voice was distant and with the effect it would have if she were standing inside a tunnel and the sounds bounced off each other in scattered echoes.
“Val, what's happening?”
Valentina was trying to answer her question; she really wanted to. But the exhaustion she was experiencing right now, was one she had never experienced before. Not even in the hectic weeks of finals that used to leave her with scarce sleep for several days.
"Juls..." she managed to breath out.
The name left her lips like a faint mumble that was lost in the flames of the candles.
With the last effort to stay awake, Valentina tried to focus on Juliana's brown eyes, finding enough confidence in them to let herself go by.
Valentina sighed deeply, gently closed her eyes, and then... nothing.
***
As much as her hand clung to hers, shaking it hard, Valentina wasn't waking up.
Juliana kept calling her name over and over again, already on the verge of freaking out. She should have never let this madness happen.
That promise was too much weight for her to carry. She should have assured Valentina that the past was not her fault, much less her responsibility.
Panic had formed a lump in her throat, and the burning that started in the corners of her eyes was a perfect match for it.
Juliana continued calling her, and it wasn't until a minute later that she could notice signs of life. Relief washed her body when the girl started to stir.
"She's waking up," announced Juliana, looking at Barbara for a brief second.
The only thought in her mind was to hug her, go back home and release her from any burden she thought she had after Juliana’s arrival.
Juliana couldn't lose her, not this Valentina, either.
***
The feeling that was taking over her was familiar.
She had experienced it numerous times during her long life.
The problem this time, however, was that she didn't feel like she was waking up from a few hours' sleep. In fact, if she hadn't known better, she would’ve thought she'd been sleeping for years.
Valentina blinked rapidly, making her eyelashes flutter, seeking to shake off the drowsiness, regain full consciousness, and try to put her thoughts in order.
The first image she could make out as she opened her eyes was the one of a woman. A very strange one at that.
Who was she? Did she know her?
No. No idea.
She didn’t recognize those dark eyes that followed each of her movements in detail, nor her exotic features, or her long hair as shiny as the plumage of a raven. Was that a tiara on her head?
Her gaze then fell on the woman's hands, resting on the surface of what was undoubtedly a table covered by a white tablecloth, on which rested three candles and an obsidian mirror.
She had once read that these objects were dangerous; they should not be kept as decoration just like that.
Her next step was to scan the room.
She surely had never been here, but the finishes on the floors, the decorations, the ironwork on the door, everything seemed familiar to her; like when she was younger and Elena went home with her husband and their two children, her grandchildren Alejandro and Elenita, who was just a baby and-”
Oh, my God.
The air left her lungs at the realization.
That, that was... she-
She started to search for information within her own mind, until she realized that the last memory of her children, her grandchildren and even her great-grandchildren, the twins Damián and Darío, Fátima, Eva and Memito, were from when she felt that life was slowly leaving her body.
What was going on here?
She, wasn’t, she shouldn’t-
“Val?”
That voice saying her name felt like a bucket of icy water falling on her back, tensing every muscle in her body, suddenly cutting off her breath and making her heart skip, one, two or several beats.
There was a hand holding hers; it was the first time she had noticed it, and she perfectly recognized the warmth and peace that emanated from it.
Her eyes filled with tears because, because it couldn't be, it just couldn't be.
What was this place?
Maybe heaven?
Had she finally found her?
Slowly, her tear blurred eyes fell on the hand that held that other one, studying the thread bracelets tied to her wrist, went up that arm covered by a black jacket, stopping for a second when she reached the tips of dark strands of hair, because something stopped her from moving forward, and took a deep breath before continuing her path, climbing up a feminine neck and find a lovely cleft chin.
Frightened, she looked back at the woman with the tiara, because she wasn't afraid of her face bringing back dear, but painful memories.
However, the owner of the hand that wrapped around hers had other plans.
"Val," she insisted, shaking their hands together.
Overwhelmed by fear, anxiety, and a bit of denial, Rebeca jumped to her feet, let go of the person clinging to her, and strode to the door, yanking it open in search of a place where to hide and protect her heart.
***
Juliana jumped to her feet seconds after Valentina left the room, determined to find out what was going on.
However, and before she could do it, the witch's hand placed on hers, stopped her.
With little patience, the dark-haired woman searched Barbara’s face for an explanation.
“She’s here” said the witch “making time count.”
***
With her heart stuck in her throat, Juliana left the room in search of Valentina, whatever version of her she was.
There was a kind of buzzing inside her ears, and her feet felt weird, trembling, indecisive.
Was it true?
Valentina, her Valentina, was here?
And how had that happened? Wasn't it supposed that, in case of success, Val’s soul should’ve taken Barbara’s body?
The feeling of uneasiness intensified inside her the further she went down that endless corridor, poking her head in each of the rooms and finding no trace of the woman.
Her going out into the city in the midst of her panic was the worst thing that could happen right now.
Of course, Valentina knew more about modernity than herself. But the idea of suddenly appearing at a time different from yours was something she had experienced firsthand, and remembering the fear she felt that night, increased her anxiety to find her.
Sounds of objects being moved alerted her ears, and Juliana fell silent, trying to determine precisely where these were coming from.
It was the soft pattering of hesitant footsteps, like those of someone exploring a place for the first time, coming from the next room.
Her mouth felt dry and her breath ragged, but her wish that Barbara's ritual had worked was much stronger now.
Cautiously, Juliana directed her movements towards what seemed to be the main bedroom.
Juliana paused in the doorway and scanned the room, finding Valentina leaning over the dresser as she stared at herself in the mirror, fingertips touching her own face.
“Val?” She barely breathed out, still keeping in mind the possibility that the witch had made a mistake and that this was the Valentina of this era.
Valentine straightened her body, turning towards her with a sudden movement, and shook her head in denial.
“Don't come near me!” She exclaimed, putting her hands forward, preventing Juliana from taking another step.
If she wasn't so nervous, Juliana would have smiled with amusement. The scene seemed a deja vu of the one that occurred at Yaya’s.
That the resemblance between great-grandmother and great-granddaughter went beyond physical features, was something she had already realized. Much existed from the Val of the past in the one from the present, and this proved it once again.
Juliana agreed to Valentina’s request, taking a few seconds to observe her. There was nothing to indicate that it wasn’t the girl who had taken her under her protection little more than a month ago.
“Who are you?” questioned Valentina, with a sharp, almost annoyed, voice.
What?
Panic started to take her over. Had she forgotten about her?
"You don't know who I am?" Her voice sounded shaky, due to panic.
"Of course I know who you are," she answered immediately, "but it can't be, it's impossible for you to be who I think... want, for you to be.” She explained “And I can't be the woman who is there." She pointed to the mirror “Not now.”
“I know,” said Juliana, taking a step forward “I know. It's crazy, even living it has been hard to believe, but it's real Val, it's me.”
The brunette was silent for a moment, trying to make sense of what she was hearing, before finally daring to clear her doubts.
"Ju- Juliana?"
The other woman nodded with a shy smile, taking another slow step in her direction, as one does with a distrustful fawn.
“But it cannot be... you're, you're...” she seemed to have problems saying the word “you left. You left me, a long time ago.”
Her blue eyes shone while holding unshed tears.
“I know, I know, but I'm here. I'm really here. I'm real, and so are you.”
Valentina slowly turned towards the mirror, taking a moment to study her reflection. She touched her face, her hair, her lips, and looked at her entire outfit.
“I don’t understand anything.”
“I get it. I really do. It's complex and crazy and, I can explain it, okay, or well, more or less, but, Val... first, can I hug you?” she pleaded, needed to feel her in her arms again.
The other girl looked at her again with those troubled eyes, already letting out a couple of tears, hesitated for a second, breathed hard through her parted lips, and nodded.
Juliana stared at the ground; it was hard for her to believe that after all, it was only three or four strides separating them. She sucked in air through her mouth, trying to work up the courage to walk them, let it out with a shaky sigh, and started walking forward. Slow, careful not to startle her.
When she was only a step away, her body turned to stone.
It was the brunette who took the initiative to make the last move. Her trembling hands rose to Juliana's face, slowly approaching her, still doubting that it was real.
Twice she was about to touch her, but both times something prevented her from doing so and instead she moved away from her as if the closeness caused her burns. It wasn't until the third that her hesitant fingers finally settled on her cheeks.
Valentina's image blurred from the tears that welled up in her brown eyes, but that didn't stop her from marveling at the way her lips began to curve up as her touch became firmer, and a tiny smile turned into a full-on grin touching the mole on her cheek.
Unable to contain herself any longer, Valentina threw herself at her.
Juliana held her firmly against her body. It was her Val, her Val; she could feel it.
"Is it you, my heart? is it really you?" asked Valentina, needing to make sure this was really happening. Her whole body was trembling, and Juliana tried to calm as best she could, caressing her back, and whispering sweet words in her ear, confirming that she was here, with her, always her Juliana.
The crying came strong, intense, loaded with years of longing, of pain, of an eternal love so powerful not even death or time had been able to stop.
***
Juliana knew she should be worrying about time; that the privilege of having each other again couldn’t be forever. But as much as she tried to focus on the real mission, her heart refused to listen to her mind.
“My heart?” spoke Valentina, still hidden in her neck.
“Hmm?”
I need to understand what is happening.
“I know.”
Despite the request, neither of them made any attempt to break contact, and remained in the same position for a few minutes, until Valentina asked for an explanation once again.
“Juliana”
"I know, Val I know, it's just…" She didn't even finish the sentence; instead, she tightened her arms around her, resting her cheek on her shoulder, giving herself a few more seconds of peace.
Reluctantly, Juliana broke the hug, putting a minimal distance between them, taking her turn to be the one to caress her cheek.
"Come," she asked, taking her hand, "I think we need to sit down to talk about this."
“Whose house is this, Juliana? What is this place? she asked when they were finally seating across from each other.
“This is, uh, the house of someone who… is… helping us.”
“To do what?”
“To, well…” this was going to be hard to explain “Val, it's complicated. But you have to keep your mind open, okay? She advised, waiting for Valentina’s sign to continue. “Okay, okay… well, Val, the first thing you have to know is that we, uhm… this year it’s, we’re in the year 2018.”
The other girl's blue eyes widened to their full capacity, and her mouth hung open as she tried to process the information.
“Pardon me?”
“You and me, now, this day... is, is 2018."
“Juliana, are you messing with me right now?”
“No! No, Val... I'm not. I swear”
"But that impossible Juliana. I didn't... look, if this is 2018, how am I… did I really make it this far?”
"N-no, Val. You... didn’t.”
"Oh, so this is another dream?"
Her heart became small with that question. The use of the word 'another' let her know it had happened before.
“No”
“Then, what is this? I'm not understanding anything, Juliana, because you're also... are we ghosts?” she asked carefully, sounding like someone who didn’t trust her own words.
Juliana smiled once again. The resemblance to present-day Val was simply uncanny. Now that she knew them both, it was easy to realize it.
“I know, but, open mind, okay?” She reminded her, already readying herself for what was about to come.
“Okay”
“Val, listen. The body you occupy right now… isn't yours. It… it belongs to your great-grand-daughter Valentina.”
For the first time in all this time, Juliana realized that there was a clock on the bedside table. And it is that the silence that followed her statement was so sepulchral, that the annoying noise of its hands seemed to reverberate strongly throughout the room.
Valentina was looking at her now, as if waiting for Juliana to tell her it was all a bad joke.
“Juliana, what are you saying? I don’t even have a grand-daughter named Valentina.
"Yes, you do. You just didn't get to know her."
Valentina tried to get up, but Juliana stopped her, clutching her hand.
"I can prove it, Val, look."
With that, Juliana gently moved their hands together.
"Where, where is it?" She murmured breathlessly.
They both knew what she was talking about.
“Valentina Carvajal never hurt her hand. That’s why it's not there, because this body” she gave the hand a soft squeeze “belongs to her.”
“Carvajal? Eva and Memito’s sister?
“Yes, the youngest.”
Valentina looked away from her, fixing her attention on a point behind Juliana, who turned around to follow her line of vision, finding the image of both of them in the mirror.
“She-, she looks exactly like me”
“Right?”
“Her hair is different” she said, looking at Juliana through the reflection “and yours as well. I like it.”
Complimented, taking a strand of dark hair between her fingers.
"Yeah, I needed to mingle with this time's fashion” she joked, but Valentina’s face showed how many doubts she was having at the moment.
“And, how did you get here? How did you get to Valentina?”
“It's a crazy story. I literally hopped from that night-”
“The night you died?” interrupted the other girl.
“I don't know if that happened, Val. I don’t remember.”
Juliana’s vague answers ended up driving Valentina mad, who got up from her seat like a spring.”
“I just don't understand, Juliana. I don't understand this madness. You're telling me that this is real, but you assured I'm dead even though I’m here breathing again like it’s nothing.
I ask if you’re dead, too, which would make more sense because it’d mean this is heaven or something like that, but you say you don’t know. What is happening?”
“Val, I swear, I just… don’t know.”
“Well, you know what? I do Juliana, I do know because I was there. I was in your house when your mother was clinging to your shoes, the last thing they found of you. I heard the authorities announce that the river flow had probably taken you so far, we would never find you. But that at that point, we were looking for just a body, because it was impossible for you to have survived such a fall. I saw your parents bury a casket only filled with all the evidence that there had ever been a Juliana Valdés in this world.”
“I-”
“And I hated you, Juliana” she interrupted “I hated you for a long time. I hated you because you promised me that we would be happy. You made me believe in a dream that was impossible. I truly thought we would go to a city that would hide us among its skyscrapers and would give us the opportunity to love each other freely, and then you left, Juliana, you left just like that, and left me alone.”
“Val”
“That day, a part of me died with you. I never called ‘my heart’ anyone. Not even my own children. I never allowed anyone to call me anything close to Valentina, much less 'Val'. I hated your memory. I ran from everything we ever shared, because I couldn't bear the thought of not existing anymore. It took me months to get your present out of where I buried it within my clothes.”
“My what?”
“And what were you planning anyway?” Valentina was not willing to let Juliana speak until she finished all she had to say “Show up at my birthday party with your new fiancé? Give me the present, a hug and tell me 'congratulations Valentina, May you have a long life. I'm sorry, I don't love you anymore'?”
"No, Val.”
“Then came the stage of acceptance” She continued still ignoring the other girl. “And then of resignation, of understanding once and for all that you were no longer here, and life had to go on whether I wanted it or not; that at the end of the day, I couldn't be mad at you”
Her shoulders fell in defeat and big tears flowed freely down her face
“I had no right to be angry with you for leaving the way you did. Much less for finding a person who could give you something I would have never been able to. You did the right thing by choosing to love openly. So, I let you go, Juliana, I let you rest. I transformed your memory into smiles, allowed myself to live, have a family, and move on.”
Those words broke Juliana's heart. How much damage had caused that silly confusion; how much pain had caused the rash decision to go to her house that night.
Perhaps, if she had listened to everyone who told her to wait a couple more days to visit her ‘friend’, things would’ve been different. But life, the universe, Barbara and Valentina had given her a new opportunity to make amends; the least thing she could do was to make it count.
With all the determination she could muster to undo the tightness in her throat, Juliana walked back to the brunette, wrapping her hands around her again.
"Val, it wasn't like that.”
“What do you mean?”
“The, the... all, the accident.”
“Weren't you in it?
“Yes, I was there, but not exactly.”
"Juliana, please," she asked, exasperatedly.
"Val, listen to me.”
Valentina clenched her jaw and nodded.
“Fernando and I were friends.”
“Jul-”
"No, Val... he, he was like us. Do you remember Jimmy? The boy who worked in the flower shop next to Fer’s house?”
On the occasions that Valentina had visited Juliana and Fernando was there, Jaime's presence was also common.
Juliana waited for the other girl's confirmation before continuing.
“Well, they were, they were... he, he was his ‘Val’.”
“What?”
“Fer and Jimmy, they were like you and me, they were...
“Together?”
Juliana nodded, corroborating Valentina’s words.
“It was a plan, a very stupid one.”
Juliana looked down, and started to rub Valentina’s hand. With or without a scar, it was something she did to calm herself and soothe the other girl.
“Fernando, he knew about us. He found out, like Phine did, by observing us.” She explained “One day he came up with this idea. It seemed perfect because his mom would stop pressuring him to meet someone and maybe your mom could, I don't know, let her guard down a bit if she stopped being suspicious. In my head it made sense because I would be able to see you more often, and the wait for New York would be more bearable. But we did it all wrong. I told him I needed you to know before anyone else. But he insisted on telling her mom already, and I agreed because he loved Jimmy as much as I love you, but… Felicia was home the night we announced it, and… the rest, you already know.”
Looking up, she found a stunned Valentina covering her mouth.
Without adding anything else, the brunette released her grip to go back to her old position, sitting on the edge of the bed, as if the weight of the truth was too much for her to take.
Juliana followed her, sitting across from her, clutching her hand once again. She didn’t want to spend a second without touching her.
“Then everything was...”
"A misunderstanding, yes," she confirmed, "I didn't lie to you, Val. I would never. Not with something as serious as what I feel for you."
“And why didn't you say anything to me afterwards? I don't know, like sending a letter or something.”
“I tried; I swear I did. One day, I received a letter from my mother demanding to meet 'her future son-in-law'. That made me realize you knew, and that was the reason for your silence.” Juliana got closer to Valentina and looked directly at her eyes, so she could see how honest she was being right now.
“The moment I knew, I wrote whole pages explaining everything to you, begging for a chance to explain everything, and then I ran to the post office.”
“But I never got it.”
Juliana avoided her gaze, not wanting to reveal the conclusions she Val of the present, had come to.
However, the one from the past didn't take long to get to the same one.
“It was my mother, right?” she asked, a dark expression on her face “she made this”
"I don't know, Val.”
“Of course it was her, Juliana. My mother used to intercept any mail that got to the house. She probably suspected something. I even had to start bribing Cristina with some clothes so she would get to the mail before my mother and bring your letters to me. Mom probably got that one before Cristina and knew about us, because Felipe started to show up almost every day at the house invited by her and managed to get dad to stop giving me money for my books. She knew and made it her mission to keep me away from you.
Juliana chose to continue the conversation; after all, that wasn’t the point of this conversation; she needed to tell her all the truth.
“Then, I remembered that I had promised you to be at your birthday party, so I begged Fernando to drive to your house” Remembered Juliana “Everyone told me to wait. That you’d understand the weather was horrible, and you’d be happy to see me a few days later, but I refused. I was desperate to talk to you. Fer knew what you mean to me, so he ended up saying yes.”
The more she talked, the more she strengthened her hold on Valentina.
“The rain got worse and for the last stretch of the road the storm was just too much. I was a little tired, so I closed my eyes for a moment, maybe a second or two, no more than that, and then... then nothing; there's nothing else in my head.”
The room was left in complete silence as Juliana finished her speech. The weight of her confession fell on both of them.
Years of pain, of suffering, had been caused by a misunderstanding, a mistake, and the malice of a person who was supposed to always ensure the happiness of their loved ones.
“That means that... you never stopped loving me?” questioned Valentina, her voice choked with tears.
Juliana almost giggled at the absurdity of the idea.
“No Val, me stop loving you? That would be impossible” she affirmed, while caressing her cheek “as fictitious as a sun rising in the west, a mistless forest mountain, or a spring dressed in dry leaves.”
The expression of joy on the brunette's face was simply wonderful, a sight as magnificent as the bright moons that graced the October night sky.
“And you?”
“Me?”
“Did you stop loving me?” Juliana's voice sounded as vulnerable as she felt.
Valentina had built a life and a family after all.
The other girl, however, just smiled between the tears that trickled down to her chin.
"Never my heart. As false as a sun that sets in the east, a mist that refuses to touch the mountain or an autumn full of flowers and green meadows."
Juliana smiled again and Valentina kissed the inside of her wrist before laying her head on hers.
“I...Formed a family, but it was more than anything to get away from home and from all the memories we made together in that place. There was no place in that forest that didn't remind me of you, your brown eyes, your smiles, and your voice calling me ‘Val’.”
Juliana waited a few seconds, trying to give herself the courage to continue.
"And… do you think, do you think that one day you can forgive me?"
Her forehead felt bare as she no longer had the heat emanating from Valentina protecting her from the cold.
“Forgive you what?”
“Having ruined everything with that stupid plan, for throwing away our dreams, for causing you so much pain.”
“Juliana” spoke Valentina, with a severe tone “don't you realize that it wasn't your fault?
“But”
"My heart, look at me," she asked, and Juliana obeyed. "You didn't do anything wrong; the plan made sense, okay? It could have worked, and yes, mistakes were made everywhere, but if there’s someone to blame, it would never be you; it’d be my mother. It was she who ruined everything; she was the one who caused us so much pain; her, not you… never you, you understand me?
The other girl had spent the last moments of her life and the last month of the new one blaming herself, that it was hard to really believe Valentina’s words.
"No, no, Juliana, my heart, tell me you know," implored Valentina, craddling her face between her hands, "tell me you understand."
Juliana then took some time to search her blue eyes for something that would indicate that she was not telling the truth, and found just the opposite in them. She knew that it would take her a little longer to believe it; they were simply internal conflicts that she would fight day by day, but now she knew that Valentina was being honest.
Halfway relieved of the weight on her shoulders, the black-haired woman leaned forward, again, resting her head on the other girl's.
“Val?”
She said after some seconds.
“Hmm?”
“You mentioned something about a present before, what are you referring to?”
The blue-eyed girl straightened her back again, putting her hand to her chest, like trying to take something that should be there, being surprised to find it empty. She then looked at her empty hand and lack of scars and nodded, probably remembering the circumstances around her.
“The day of your funeral” she spoke “your mother took me to your room. She gave me this small package in a golden wrap, and said that something told her that it was meant for me, so she wanted to fulfill her daughter's last wish and put it in my hands. You know what it was, don't you?”
The dark-haired girl nodded.
"A chain with the waning moon pendant, and the photograph you gave me before I left for the city?"
Valentina moved her head up and down to confirm.
“When I finally had the courage to open it, it became my most precious possession. The last thing I had left of my great love. So, I always carried it with me, very close to my heart. Then I gave it to Elena because it made sense to me for her to have it; she gave it to her daughter, and I guess now it must belong to Eva or Valentina; that's how we agreed it would be.”
Juliana thought that perhaps it was now Eva's, since she had yet to see it in Valentina, she would’ve recognized it immediately.
"I think maybe your mother always knew," pondered Valentina, bringing her back to reality.
“Lupe?”
“Yes. The way she told me that, and I don’t know, she just knew we shared the pain of losing the one person you love the most. And I think that Felipe knew about us, as well.”
That caught Juliana’s attention immediately.
“I don't know for sure, but something in his behavior, his demeanor towards me, made me think he was always aware that there was a part of me that I could never share with him. That he knew I loved him, but not in the way he wanted.”
Then, Valentina put some distance between them to look her in the eye. Her face was completely serious.
“Because I loved him, Juliana” she confessed “I loved Felipe in that way you love someone who has become a good life partner, someone who proved that is possible to feel deep affection for them, without being a raging fire, an explosion of sensations or something that consumes you from the inside out like what I always felt for you.”
Juliana nodded quickly because, somehow, she had no problem understanding what Valentina was saying, even though she had never loved anyone else.
“I never hated him; you know? It was just that it killed me inside to think that he could have everything I wanted for me.”
Suddenly, the blue-eyed girl's expression turned grim.
"My heart," she spoke, "you realize that I made a family with him, right?"
“Yes, Val, of course, and, and that's fine, you had to go on with your life, and Felipe was a good guy, kind, polite, hard-working. He was a good choice.”
“He was always so nice to me.”
“And I will always be grateful to him for that reason, and to you, among many other things, for preserving my grandmother's name.”
Valentina shook her head in a gesture that meant she shouldn't be grateful for something she had done from the heart.
“The moment I saw her brown eyes I knew I wanted to call her Elena” Explained Valentina, with melancholy painting her voice “Felipe, the oldest, had green eyes like her father and Clara, the second, blue, like mine, so when I saw her watching me attentively with those beautiful brown eyes, made me think that, I don't know” she shrugged “there was something of you in her, and it seemed appropriate to use the name we had chosen together.”
"Thank you," said Juliana, leaving a short kiss on the back of her hand, "thank you very much."
“She surprised me when she named Elena to her own daughter, and I always believed that if Elenita had another baby girl, she would choose the same name, I never believed she would think of 'Valentina'.”
“What’s wrong with it?” asked Juliana, frowning a bit, because she had always found it pretty “It’s a good name”
For her there was no more beautiful sound than the one those letters produced together, surpassed very closely by hers, when pronounced by her, in any of its variations. Juliana... or Juls.
“You know very well that I never liked it, if I tolerated it because it was you calling me by it, and with what happened, it was very clear to everyone that I hated it.”
A nostalgic silence settled between them.
“But it suits her perfectly, don't you think?” Ventured Juliana, after a while “She looks so much like you, not only physically, Val. There are so many things, so many gestures and attitudes, her cheerful, kind character, her protective instincts and the way she is willing to help you without expecting anything in return.”
She could have continued listing everything that made great-grandmother and great-granddaughter so alike, but the curious way Valentina looked at her made her stop. She had made her point anyway; the name was perfect for the person, it had been before, and it was now.
“But, my heart, you still haven't explained the other part of the story. How did this…” She motioned her finger between the two “happen. How did we get here?”
Oh, for a moment I had forgotten all that; now came the hardest part to believe and the craziest to tell.
***
A couple of rooms away, Barbara was carefully watching the flames of the three candles.
The one in front of her shone with conventional height and brilliance.
The one in front of Juliana, did it a little more intensely, moving as if a non-existent wind made her dance.
The third, corresponding to the site where Valentina was sitting before, shone brightly; its flame was high, dazzling, and was consuming the body of the candle at great speed.
"Hurry up, Juliana," she murmured softly, hoping her words would somehow reach the girl, "I hope you're acting fast, time is running out."
***
Unlike her, Valentina had always believed in magic, the stars, positive and negative energies.
When they went through bad times, the brunette attributed it to the position of the stars and the bad vibes that surrounded them. She regularly avoided walking under stairs, passing salt from hand to hand, or breaking any kind of crystal, especially mirrors.
That made her hope that she wouldn’t find her talk about energy portals too difficult to believe. But as soon as she heard about time loops and cosmic traveling through televisions, she realized that she was doing a very poor job of convincing her.
“So, you just... jumped out of the TV just like that? After Valentina saw you in the movie and did some research on you?”
"Yeah," she ratified. "I swear I don't remember anything else. In my mind, one second I’m in Fernando's car and the other at Yaya's house.
The brunette knew who she was referring to. She had kept the title of 'grandma' forever and when Elena had her own grand-children, they chose to call her 'Yaya' to avoid confusion.
“And what happened, then?”
“We tried to investigate. Well, Valentina did. She has been very good to me, Val. She has never left me alone, takes me to her school, gave me clothes, one of those modern phones to always communicate with her. She’s got a golden heart, really, she’s very good, you should be proud of her.”
Juliana thought that there must be something in her face when talking about Valentina from the present, because it was the second time that the woman in front of her was silent and gave her that mysterious look.
“And in this investigation. What did she find?” questioned Valentina, returning to the original line of their conversation.
“Energy portals.”
“What?!”
“She has an uncle, Camilo, Camilo Guerra, do you know him?”
“I’ve only heard of him.”
“Well, he’s an investigator of paranormal things and has been helping us. We had to wait for her to return from a trip, but things have never been closer to having an explanation” the brunette nodded, giving her consent to continue “he contacted someone else, a witch.”
“Witch?” Alarm was evident in her voice.
“Yes. But it's not like you imagined her; there's nothing strange about her other than the way she looks at me and that tiara she wears on her head.”
"So that woman…"
"Yeah. It’s her” Juliana confirmed, already knowing who she was talking about “she and Camilo know a lot about this, and they think that an energy portal opened in Yaya's house that night, you know about these things, don't you? of stars and magic.”
“I once read about them, out of curiosity, but I never thought they were real.”
“They are Val. Very real.”
The brunette was silent, processing the information she had just received, her eyes fixed on a point on the ground, while she reflected on it.
“But, a television? Wouldn't it have to be a mirror or something that contained a kind of ancestral power?” she asked, genuinely interested.
Juliana was not surprised by her quick choice to stop questioning this and let herself believe in all this madness of an explanation. Valentina had never been as stubbornly skeptical as her.
“The witch thinks that there must have been many other factors for a television to have the ability to become a gateway from one time cycle to another. But they’re still investigating that.
"I see," she hummed. "And Valentina? How has she taken all this?"
"At first she was scared, naturally, but now she is fully invested and I think she has understood everything" Juliana moved to the edge of her seat. "The witch said that this portal has the purpose of correcting fate's mistakes. That and her dreams helped her connect the dots.
“Dreams? What dreams?”
Oh right, she hadn't told her that part.
“Since the night at Yaya’s, Valentina started to experience some very vivid dreams. At first she didn't give them much importance, until she realized that what she was seeing wasn't just a product of her imagination; they were memories” she paused to gauge her reaction “your… your memories, Val. They’re actually your memories”
“Excuse me?”
“Yes, she... sees things in them, moments that you and I lived in the past. She knew about Sultan, about my mother and yours; she visited the viewpoint of the mountain, witnessed our first kiss; she was there when you found out about Fernando, and also the day of my accident“ the blue-eyed girl's face became more bewildered with each word “she saw it before I told her Val; she saw it in her dreams.”
"Wait, wait, wait… are you saying my great-granddaughter can see my… our memories?”
“Only when she's asleep.”
Once again, the clock on the reading table became the protagonist of the scene, being the one to break the severity of that deafening silence.
With the slowness of someone who is unaware of her movements, Valentina stood up, pacing all over the place, this time with a calm, collected step and talking to herself instead of with Juliana, not in a claim, but in a reflection.
Then she stopped and covered her mouth with her hand, as she did whenever something made a big impression on her.
It was as if, as if she herself had come to a conclusion that Juliana and Val of the present were completely unaware of.
“So that means... Valentina has my name; we’re physically identical, she came to this world after I left, and the memories of my life visit her when she is asleep?”
Juliana nodded enthusiastically.
“My heart” she said, walking towards Juliana, grasping her hands with hers. “My heart, do you know what that means?”
“What?”
“Juliana, tell me...” she urged her, shaking their hands together “what explanation did Camilo and the witch give for Valentina's dreams?”
“They’re still working on that.”
“Juliana!”
Her exclamation took her by surprise.
“Yeah?”
“Can’t you see it?”
The black-haired girl looked around the room, trying to figure out if that expression was literal or not.
"No, no, honey, look at me." Her hands closed around her neck, climbing up until they cupped her face.
Juliana begged for an answer with her eyes.
“Juliana, Valentina is me.”
“What?!”
“I live in Valentina Carvajal. She and I are two different people” she paused to lick her lips “who share the same soul.”
“Val...”
“My heart. I understand that Valentina doesn’t want to see it; that she is afraid to accept it; that she has doubts, but you? How can it be possible that you do not recognize me in her, and you can’t find her in me while I speak to you?”
The words kept bouncing around in Juliana’s head, creating an echo that repeated itself over and over again.
Was she understanding correctly? Or was it something that she had always known, but refused to accept it?
“Juliana, my reincarnated soul lives in-”
“No, no” she interrupted her, prey to the fear of accepting the truth “that’s not possible.”
“And you think that any of this craziness can?” The question was ironic, almost joking, and reminded her of all those times that the other brunette had asked her the same question.
Valentina reached for her hands to wrap them in hers, bringing them to her lap, shaking them, urging her to respond to her gaze.
“But-”
“My heart, why are you refusing to accept it, if you promised me, yourself?”
“Me?”
“Yes, in my dream, do you remember?”
"Val, I don't know what you're talking about.”
The brunette seemed hurt by what she had just said, but Juliana was being honest; she had no idea what she was referring to.
“And about, 'You will forever be my always? You haven't forgotten about that, have you?”
“Of course not!”
“Well, my hearts, this is ours forever, this moment and this era. It never was in the life we share, it would never have been possible, but today, today it is, Juliana... today we can be together, don't you see? That's why my soul was reborn in Valentina, that mistake Camilo and the witch are talking about? The one that destiny is trying to correct with this absurdity? It's about you and me being finally able to love each other freely, as it could never have happened back then.”
“No, no” desperate to make her understand that she was wrong, Juliana dropped to her knees and wrapped her arms around her lovers’ waist “she said the reason why the portal opened is for me to apologize. The- the mistake is that we never got to talk and… that's why we came here, you were supposed to occupy the witch’s body, not Val's.”
“Val?” she questioned, putting a finger under her chin, making her look at her “Do you call her Val, too?” her eyes filling with tears, but on her lips, there was a real smile, full of hope, not pain, and Juliana knew it because she was a consummate expert in Valentina's gestures “you love her already, don't you?”
Juliana tried to say something, but nothing was coming out of her mouth. The realization was coming to her at this very moment.
"Val," she whispered in a broken voice, imploring forgiveness with her eyes.
Juliana clung closer to her, resting her head on her lap, fighting the guilt bubbling inside her. She loved Valentina, in more ways than one; she couldn't hide it; she had never been able to, at this time or the other.
It hadn't even been her intention to fall for this Valentina, but it was that she had been in love with her since she found her stealing her mother's plants; and that love had traveled with her and fallen again on the same blue eyes she found when crossing that portal.
"My heart, it's not a bad thing, that's how it has to happen, don't you see? Juliana loving Valentina is the natural order of things" promised the brunette, cradling her face, using her thumbs to stroke her skin “By loving me in the past, you loved her in this era, and loving her in the present, means that you love me also in our time.”
“But, Val, maybe it's not like that, maybe we're fixing things right now and then I can go back to the past... with you.”
“And change everything in the future?” She countered back “tell me, are you willing to erase this reality? To make the Valentina who received you and showed you her heart of gold disappear forever, her siblings, her parents?”
“I... I...
“Because my heart breaks at the thought of never having little Felipe, Clarita and Elena, their children, their grandchildren... and that includes little Valentina, Juliana, I couldn't. I wouldn't be able to.”
Juliana had no answer for that; losing the Valentina of the present terrified her as much as losing the one from the past.
“But don't worry, my heart, you don't have to choose” she assured “it's not necessary. Valentina Carvajal I, are the same essence of a woman, who is in love with the same girl.”
Juliana shook her head. Valentina was wrong about something.
“No, Val… she doesn't love me.”
“I don't think so, but if it was true, I have no doubt that she will, Juliana” she spoke with the confidence of someone who knows a universal truth “she'll love you as much as I did.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because she has my soul, my heart, and my soul was made to love you.”
Blue joined brown once more, conversing in the silent way they had learned to do decades and probably lifetimes ago.
Juliana's spirit had also been born to live looking for Valentina's, even if she had to travel through time to find her, and she would do it again as many times as necessary.
“Actually,” added the chestnut “if she doesn’t’ love you yet, I have no doubt in my mind she’s already halfway there. Which means you have to give her the last push.”
“Push?”
“Yes, make her love you, Juliana. Win her heart over.”
“But how?”
"The same way you did with mine," she replied quickly with a soft expression on her face.
“And what did I do? Make ointments for you? Help you with your classes?” said Juliana, making fun of herself, but she stopped for a few seconds when she realized something.
"What?” asked Valentina, putting a strand of hair behind Juliana’s ear.
"It's just... I think I already do that," she confessed.
“What?”
“Help her with school.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Val… she is, she never pays attention to her teachers, she’s always distracted and never fails to have an excuse for it, so I try to take her class notes so she can check them afterwards.”
"Always terrible with that, huh?" joked Valentina, trying to lighten the mood.
It was hard to admit, but she was telling the truth; it made much sense. Valentina and Valentina Rebeca were two different people who shared the same essence
“You just have to be you, my heart, and then our soul will do the rest; it’ll hear your calling."
Both women looked at each other with serene, complicit stares, knowing that they had deciphered destiny’s reason for doing all this.
Suddenly, Valentina's expression fell completely; she touched her forehead, like she was filling up sick.
“Val!” exclaimed Juliana, opening her arms to receive the other girl's body just in time and preventing her from falling to the ground "Val, are you okay?"
"I don't know, Juliana, I... I feel very weak and..." She touched her chest, which filled and emptied with difficulty.
“I’ll go get help” offered Juliana, trying to get up, but Valentina stopped her, clinging for dear life to her body.
"No! Don't go," she begged, putting both hands on each side of her face.
Her sudden weakness, the heaviness of her movements, and the struggle to stay awake reminded her of what she had experienced just minutes ago; her Val was about to leave.
“Do you remember you promised me that when we met again, it would be forever?” questioned the brunette, her diminished blue eyes refusing to give up, stretching out the time they had left as much as possible.
“Yeah”
"Then keep your promise, Juliana." She sighed, struggling to let out every word.
"Forever your always, isn't it?" insisted Valentina, hiding her face in Juliana’s neck.
The other girl could feel the heat of her tears touching her skin, sliding down the inside of her jacket.
“Of course, Val, forever my always.”
“Then make it come true, my heart” she asked, focusing her eyes “and never forget me, okay? Always remember that I live inside her. I am her, and she is me, always your Val.”
With the last hints of strength left in her body, Valentina approached her to leave a kiss on the mole on her cheek and hide her face in her favorite place.
Juliana clung to her with all the strength that the other girl no longer had, and broke into disconsolate tears when she felt the entire weight of Valentina's body collapse on top of her, her arms falling limp to her sides.
She was gone, she was no longer with her.
No.
That wasn’t true.
Today she had understood everything, fate's actions, the reasons why such a complicated thing had happened to them a few weeks ago.
The mistake she had to correct was not a plea for forgiveness; it was for her to keep her promise, one she had made more than eighty years ago.
Juliana allowed herself to hold her like this for a couple more minutes, feeling the soft tickle of her breath bounce off her skin, and then used all her strength to stand up, carrying her to the bed, where she deposited carefully.
Barbara entered a few seconds later, carrying in the palm of her hand what looked like the last button of wax from an extinguished candle.
“Did she leave?”
Juliana nodded without taking her eyes off Valentina.
"Did you manage to tell her what you wanted?"
The girl nodded again, this time taking the opportunity to caress her face.
"You two already knew, didn't you?" She asked bluntly, she didn't think she needed explanations.
"It was the first conclusion we got to” answered the witch, "there were too many signs not to notice. If the dreams were not enough, there was the name, the physical resemblance, the key to her presence to open the portal.”
"And why didn't they tell us anything?
“Camilo believes it is way too much information for Valentina to process at once, and I agree. The best course of action in these cases is to go slowly, lead her to find the truth by herself, instead of trying to force her to believe it; hence the insistence with the book.”
“I see”
"Now you understand the reason for that portal, don't you?"
"I do," she confirmed.
"Very well," Barbara celebrated, "and what are you going to do about it?"
Juliana turned her attention back to the beautiful woman sleeping peacefully, recovering from the sacrifice she had made for her, unaware of the past that seemed to have bound them together for so long.
"Keep a promise," she answered.
She loved her, like now and like always, so she had to fight for their love. She owed it to Valentina.
If things didn't turn out the way they wanted, then she would wait for her, she would do it in this life, the next, or as many as it was necessary.