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2017-03-04
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Storytime: Celebrity Blindness

Summary:

Yuuri Katsuki introduces himself with his name, his major, and the fact that he collects tiaras. He does not mention the fact that he’s an Olympic skater.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Yuuri Katsuki’s icebreaker fun fact is not actually the fact that he’s a decorated Olympic skater. No, that would have made way too much sense.

 

His fact is about tiaras.

 

oOoOo

 

Back to the beginning, though. The beginning is that Jun is sitting at the back of the classroom, surrounded by aimless chatter and waiting for the Psychology teacher to arrive, when Yuuri Katsuki walks through the door.

 

For a moment, there is silence. In that moment, Yuuri glances around suspiciously and edges his way into the back, about five seats down from Jun, where he proceeds to hunch over his phone in all of his introverted glory. The rest of his classmates burst out into frantic whispering, from which Jun can hear such phrases as Did you see him?! and I didn’t know it was possible for a guy to be so cute, what.

 

Yuuri somehow manages to miss this. Either that, or he’s just really good at faking it, because he does not react at all.

 

In any case, the focus in the room shifts towards the front when the teacher walks in moments later, and since all the chatter dies down Jun foolishly thinks that’s the end of that. 

 

———

 

Their class is small enough that the teacher has everyone say their name, their major, and a random fun fact. 

 

Jun is absolutely certain that, despite how pointless these icebreakers tend to be, absolutely no one is forgetting that Yuuri Katsuki, Kinesiology Major, has a tiara collection that he shares with his best friend.

 

Like, personally, Jun thinks it’s cool. He mentions that it ranges from actual store-bought things to the clumsy bead circlet his friend’s three eight-year-olds had made for him years ago to a particularly memorable crown that his best friend bought himself for winning some sort of dorm war. But she’s also pretty sure that the reason why most of her other classmates are going to remember this is because they’re utterly entranced by the guy, staring and whispering and giggling as they do. 

 

He’s attractive, unfairly so when he can wear oversized v-necks like a fashion statement instead of a college mess, but that probably means a lot more to her classmates than it does to Jun. 

 

After the icebreakers, their professor decides to just drop a group project into their laps. It’s met with quite a bit more enthusiasm than usual, since Yuuri Katsuki is sitting all by his lonesome and thus easy to snap up into a group, except that only lasts for the thirty seconds it takes for the teacher to reveal that he’s already assigned them partners. 

 

Jun ends up in a group with Yuuri Katsuki.

 

Yuuri himself, that’s fine. Yuuri seems a little distant, sure, but he’s friendly and polite, and really all that means is that Jun doesn’t have to put too much effort into socializing. What’s intimidating, then, is the fact that half of her classmates are very blatantly glaring at her and her two other group mates from behind Yuuri’s head. 

 

And of course, when Yuuri feels the stares and turns around to look, they abruptly cut off for smiles and little finger-twitch waves, so he still has no idea what’s going on. 

 

oOoOo

 

The thing about group projects is that you have to be diligent with them, if only because other people’s grades depend on it. Well technically you don’t, but then you’re a jerk, and no one in the group is really a jerk.

 

Jun is a procrastinator, sure, but she’ll do the work, and do it well. Her MO for group projects tends to be either wait for someone to make the first move or make it herself, out of impatience.

 

This time, Jun doesn’t have to do her fake-leader impatience thing, because Yuuri asks if everyone is free to meet for lunch on Thursday.

 

Jun is. Andrea and Michael, she’s pretty sure, will make themselves free if they’re not, because the two of them are smitten with Yuuri, and just about every moment that Yuuri’s not in their general vicinity is met with whispers of he’s so cute Jun, don’t you agree?

 

Sure? Like, he’s not unattractive, but aside from wondering how he manages to make his bedhead look so stylish when everyone else’s looks like the messes they actually are, she also doesn’t care, and mostly the collective class crush on Yuuri Katsuki is hilarious once she stops fearing for her life. 

 

Anyways, they meet up for lunch to discuss the project in the quad. It’s a paper and a presentation, fairly standard stuff, and one of the first things they hash out is which two of them are going to be the unlucky saps to actually present. 

 

Yuuri says, “Well, I’m kind of used to crowds, and I’m probably not going to do as much for the project because of prior commitments anyways, so I could be one person to present?”

 

“Sounds good to me,” Jun replies, “That’s one person left. Anyone else?”

 

Jun swears she can hear the crickets chirping. Either the other two hate public speaking as much as she does, or they just really want to watch Yuuri speak. 

 

Honestly, her sympathy is lacking because it’s probably the latter, but they’re also moving approximately nowhere at this pace, so she shrugs and says, “I can be the other presenter, if no one else wants to. I can present pretty well, even if I don’t particularly like it.”

 

Yuuri nods and says that sounds good, while the other two sigh in relief. Jun has to wonder if they realize that the person presenting would end up standing fairly close to Yuuri, and if they’ll be envious at all. Then, she wonders if maybe that’s the entire reason they don’t want to present, that the proximity might cause them to short-circuit and they don’t want to risk their grades. 

 

She’d like to think they’d be over it by the time the presentation rolls around, but who even knows.

 

oOoOo

 

The group ends up meeting for more than just lunch and projects. For one thing, there are midterms, which means studying and suffering. Yuuri can’t always make the group study sessions, of which there are more than Jun has ever seen for a class, but when he does there’s always a paradoxically concurrent increase and decrease in productivity.

 

Increase, because Yuuri is a sharp mind willing to explain the things he understands, who also listens attentively to what he doesn’t. 

 

Decrease, because invariably someone's eyes glaze over in absent-minded admiration as they listen to him talk, and when Yuuri notices he thinks they should take a five-minute break for snacks and stretching. 

 

Also, he has a habit of fiddling with his gold ring when he’s thinking, and more than one classmate has commented on how glad they are it’s not on his left hand while simultaneously sighing over how deep and thoughtful the action makes him seem. 

 

…Yeah, people are weird. 

 

———

 

There’s also that one time that Michael, somewhat frantically, jolts in his seat in the middle of a meet up to exclaim, “Frick, I need an actual suit for my aunt’s wedding.”

 

Which is how their work session somewhat abruptly devolves into shopping. Andrea goes because she’s all for these kinds of social things and wants to know more while simultaneously helping Michael out. Yuuri goes because Andrea and Michael beg him to help with his fashion expertise, to which he agrees with great bemusement.

 

Jun goes because she likes spending time with them and the afternoon is already free, but also because she doesn’t really know how to say I’d literally be no use in this situation so I’m not sure why you’d want me there in a polite way.

 

It’s pretty fun, in that slightly guilty way of procrastination, but also Jun finds out she somehow knows more about men’s suits than Yuuri. 

 

Considering that all of Jun’s information comes from a singular, impassioned Tumblr response to a badly fitted suit, this makes no sense. Seriously, Yuuri periodically looks like he’s stepped out of a fashion spread of overpriced sweaters while Jun wears jackets around her waist out of laziness and a disregard for outdated fashion, how does she know more about menswear?

 

The entire thing is so baffling that Jun finds herself asking before she can think better of it. 

 

Yuuri’s answer doesn’t really help matters much, because he just laughs and says, “No, I don’t really know much about fashion. It’s just that Viktor likes to dress me up.”

 

Who the heck is Viktor? Why does Viktor dress Yuuri up? How close do you even have to be to a person to have them dress you up? Does it actually matter, when Yuuri apparently has no problem with it?

 

Jun doesn’t find out because they get called away to advise on a pair of cufflinks, and after that, she never really bothers to ask. 

 

oOoOo

 

After the presentation, Andrea suggests they go out to eat, since everyone is free and they need to celebrate the end to this one specific stressor. That’s how Jun finds herself walking downtown with her group mates, on her way to a nice little cafe that they’ve all been curious to try. It’s such a nice day that they end up sitting outside, under the dinky little table umbrellas, and the only real interruption is when Yuuri’s phone goes off. 

 

Since all they’re doing at the moment is reading the menus, Yuuri chooses to focus on the text conversation at hand. He continues it for about a minute before he stows his phone away, and because Yuuri is polite when he’s not being nervous, Jun thinks that’s going to be the last of the distractions from him.

 

Until a group of five high schoolers passes by their table.

 

Now, this in and of itself is not particularly unusual. They’re in a busy part of town, after all, and it is lunchtime. What’s unusual is that one of the kids, a broad-shouldered guy with a sakura flower headband in his black hair, glances to the side and absolutely freezes

 

“Isha, pinch me,” he whispers, grabbing at the sunset-orange sleeve of a dark-skinned girl, “I think that’s Yuuri Katsuki.”

 

The group, as a collective, turns to look. The girl, Isha, lets out a high-pitched scream before she jumps and claps both her hands over her mouth. After a moment, she pulls her hands away sheepishly and says, “I’m so sorry for screaming, but you’re Yuuri Katsuki!”

 

Yuuri, somewhat inexplicably, looks amused. To be fair, Jun would also be amused if everything wasn’t so completely confusing, because why do random people know her Psychology classmate by name?

 

To the side, Andrea and Michael fall silent, staring blankly as the group of five starts chattering amongst themselves. 

 

“You ask him, you’re the bravest.”

 

“But he’s your favorite.”

 

“Shh, he’s right there!”

 

“He’s millions of people’s favorites, this can’t be new information to him.”

 

“Yeah, but…”

 

Either Yuuri takes pity on them or is just done laughing at their expense, because he finally interrupts, with a smile warm and brilliant like sunshine breaking through clouds, to ask, “Did you want autographs, then?”

 

The kid with the flower headband squeaks, “Yes, please,” and Jun is pretty sure she hears one of the guys in the back whispering, “I think his smile could make flowers grow.”

 

Well, he’s not wrong. 

 

The kids end up getting their autographs, three of which are on repurposed napkins from their table. They also finagle selfies out of the whole encounter, and offer payment for these treasures by gushing about how amazing Yuuri looks when he skates, how it’s like watching him fly, if one could fly and dance at the same time. 

 

Yuuri very quickly blushes red. 

 

Eventually, though, the excitement dies down to a banked glow. One of the kids hanging out in the back, a girl with gold streaks in brunette hair and a slight roll to her r’s, says, “Can you tell Yura and Viktor that we’re looking forwards to the next skate? You guys did amazing work with his choreography, and he skates it so beautifully.”

 

“Of course,” Yuuri answers, “I’ll be sure to tell them… Dulce, right?”

 

Dulce, flustered because she’s facing the full brunt of Yuuri’s smile, nods. After that, she and the two boys further in the background shuffle a little distance away, in a clear sign that they’re ready to go but also willing to wait. Meanwhile, Isha and the boy with the headband remain where they stand, in front of the table. 

 

Silence holds awkwardly as headband boy fidgets. It’s like he can’t quite figure out words anymore, though he didn’t seem to have a problem earlier. 

 

Finally, after a few more seconds plod by, Isha nudges him with her elbow. This is just about enough to jostle him into blurting out, “I told my parents that I was non-binary because of you. And I asked them to call me Sam instead of Samuel, and to use they pronouns, and they agreed, but I was so worried and I wouldn’t have been able to tell them if you hadn’t had your Eros and Sakura skates because you were just so pretty and so brave, and thank you so much!”

 

Yuuri, bless his self-deprecating little heart, looks overwhelmed and confused at the outpouring. Still, it doesn’t take him too long to compose himself and laugh, “Wow… I’m so glad you were inspired by my programs. Really, though, that kind of courage was all yours. I’m proud of you.”

 

He pauses, twisting the gold ring on his right hand. After a moment, Yuuri gestures to Sam’s autograph and asks, “Can I see that one more time?”

 

Sam nods frantically even as they hand over the napkin. Yuuri taps a pen against his lips before he adds a postscript to the autograph, then he gives it back.

 

Upon receiving it, Sam proceeds to squeak, clutch the napkin to their heart, and reverently murmur, “I am going to frame this and treasure it forever.”

 

Isha laughs at Sam before gently shoving them in the direction of their friends. Sam resists for as long as it takes to sketch out a quick bow and offer up one more heartfelt thanks, then follows Isha with a skip in their step.

 

Before continuing on their way, the five kids wave at Yuuri, who waves back. Yuuri then turns back to the table with a quiet smile, but his expression morphs into confusion when he sees the utter shock on their faces. It’s unfair really, because he has no right to look like that when Andrea, Michael, and Jun are much more confused right now.

 

In the face of this awkwardness, Yuuri rubs at the back of his neck and, oh so intelligently, says, “Um…?”

 

“What just happened?” It’s only after the words are out of her mouth that Jun realizes she’s spoken. She wishes, somewhat belatedly, that tact was a part of her brain-to-mouth filter.

 

Fortunately, her question is overrun by Andrea, who asks, “And who are Viktor and Yura, anyways?”

 

“Um, Viktor’s my husband? And Yurio’s my student?”

 

He seems to think this is obvious. Considering that Yuuri hardly ever talks about himself, this is very much not the case. Michael can attest, having chosen that unfortunate moment to take a drink of water. 

 

He spit-takes. “What?! You’re married?!”

 

Yuuri looks down at the gold ring on his right hand, then looks up at the three of them. He’s blushing rather like a newlywed who still can’t believe they’re married, but the ring has the look of something well worn to it, cared for but not really store-bought new. “Um… yes?”

 

Andrea and Michael look like all of their dreams have died, though Jun knows for a fact that their infatuation with Yuuri has long since simmered down to a lingering crush. Still, she’s not going to resent the two of them this last little drama as they finally accept that the class heartthrob is solidly off the market. 

 

She can’t really say she’s not going to laugh silently, though, as they stammer on about, “Why’s the ring on your right hand, then?”

 

Yuuri blushes as he explains that it’s a Russian custom, which is sweet. He also seems to be clueless as to why there’s so much drama over this revelation, so to test the waters, Jun asks, “Do you know how many of our classmates' hearts you’ve broken just now?”

 

“Huh?” Yuuri blinks, “But they don't even know Viktor.”

 

…Right, he’s clueless. 

 

Jun doesn’t really know what to do after this, and Yuuri doesn’t seem like he’s much better. Actually, he’s kind of glancing around like he’s afraid to look at anyone, like they have reason to hate him and leave forever or something. Normally, Andrea or Michael would be jumping out of their seats to fawn over him and reassure him that everything was one hundred percent, completely, totally a-okay, but they’re too busy staring blankly to say anything this time around. It’s honestly kind of unnerving to Jun, and she’s not even the focus of attention.

 

The end result is a supremely awkward silence that holds for far longer than Jun like. It’s long enough that she gets desperate to break it, and asks, “Sooo… you figure skate?”

 

It’s a fairly blatant attempt at jump-starting the conversation, as it were, but Yuuri latches onto it desperately enough that Jun doesn’t think he cares. “Yeah. Kind of, anyways. I mean, now I mostly coach and choreograph, but I used to be a competitive skater.” Yuuri smiles as he adds, “Sometimes I miss the competition, but coaching is it’s own reward, really, and I can still do routines for fun.”

 

It seems like hearing Yuuri’s voice helps the other two to calm down properly, or maybe they’ve just had enough time to recover. In any case, Michael finally gets himself together enough to ask, “Were you any good?”

 

Yuuri replies, “I… I guess?” 

 

If he’s going to say more, then he doesn’t get the chance, because he’s derailed by the thunk of something heavy hitting the ground, next to his chair. 

 

“What he means,” a new voice says, “Is that he was known as Japan’s ace and is literally famous for his step sequences and spins.”

 

Jun’s attention turns sharply to the irate stranger standing next to Yuuri. At first glance, she isn’t entirely certain that he isn’t some kind of elfin prince, because he sounds and dresses like any other college student, but also carries himself with an unusual kind of effortless grace. He holds himself a lot like Yuuri actually, but when paired with piercing green eyes and long, golden hair half-braided into an elaborate crown, the stranger gives the impression of the fey, standing ethereal in a fairy court.

 

Without a single care about all the attention suddenly glued to him, the stranger continues, “He’s also won a fair share of gold and silver medals at both the GPF and Worlds.” He then pauses, and adds as a mocking afterthought, “Oh, and I guess he won an Olympic Gold or something. You know, like an average, dime a dozen skater.”

 

Jun is very confused at the moment - aside from Yuuri being world famous (which, okay, she doesn’t know about celebrities, but also who expects to have one as a classmate?), she also has no idea who this kid is, and while he sounds angry it feels more fondly teasing than anything else. It’s entirely too much for her to process.

 

Yuuri, who is not confused in the slightest, nevertheless is a very ‘Yuuri’ blend of flattered and embarrassed. “Yurio,” he chides, over his shoulder, “You don’t have to say it like that…”

 

Yurio, as he’s apparently called, rolls his eyes. “What, like the truth?”

 

Then, continuing to ignore the rest of them, he gently shoves at Yuuri and says, “Anyways, move over Katsudon, you’re totally paying for my lunch. I just got out of class, and I’m hungry.”

 

“Yes, yes, of course,” Yuuri grins as he scrapes his chair to the side, making room for the most fake-grumpy student Jun has ever seen. 

 

Yuuri acts like this is all perfectly natural, up to the moment that he realizes that his three classmates are all staring at him. Then, he flushes and murmurs, “Oh, I’m so sorry… I forgot to ask if Yurio could join us. Is that okay?”

 

He has this adorable, unconsciously puppy-eyed gaze leveled across the table as he asks this, silently explaining that it would hurt his heart if they decided to shun Yurio, and that pretty much settles it. Jun was going to say okay anyways, since it’s really not a problem and Yurio seems attached, but in the face of that expression, Jun has to wonder if there’s a heart in the world that could have actually said ‘no’. 

 

Andrea and Michael, who are not only more social than Jun but also more smitten and desperately craving any information about Yuuri, are even quicker to agree. If the first thirty seconds are any indication, even one lunch shared with the kid is going to be filling their gossip coffers quite a bit. 

 

Yurio sits down only when he receives this confirmation, much at odds with the air of irreverence he tries to convey. As he glances over a new menu, handed to him by the attentive waitstaff, he asks, “So why are we talking about the fact that Katsudon is a record setting skater? I mean, aside from the fact that I’m going to be obliterating his record this season.”

 

“Ah, they were curious about why some fans approached us earlier,” Yuuri pulls out his phone and brings up a few pictures, pointing as he explains, “Dulce, over here, wanted me to tell you that your skating is beautiful.”

 

Yurio tries - and fails - to hide a bashful grin. Apparently trying to cover up this softness with a prickly exterior, he simply mutters, “Well, she’s got good taste, at least.”

 

He then pulls out his phone with an air of affected casualness, and, after a few seconds of scrolling, double taps the screen. Yurio takes a moment to type out a quick comment, then when he’s posted whatever it is, he leans back in his seat and asks, “But seriously, none of you knew about Katsudon?”

 

“Well,” Andrea says, “we don’t really follow figure skating…”

 

“Yeah, that much is obvious.” Yurio rolls his eyes, “I think the only person more famous in figure skating is his idiot husband, and he’s the most decorated skater in history.”

 

Jun’s getting tired of all the revelations - they’re making her feel kinda dumb. She’s not sure how the other’s feel, but it takes them a few moments before they can stop gaping like beached fish. 

 

Finally, Michael shakes himself back to reality and demands to know, “Why didn’t you just introduce yourself with the Olympics thing? It would have saved us so much confusion!”

 

“Seriously,” Andrea adds, “Your fun fact was about freaking tiaras.”

 

Yuuri shrinks into himself, much like he did on the first day of class. To his side, Yurio jolts upright and glares, broadcasting clearly that he’s ready to fight to the death if anyone upsets his coach. It’s cute, like a kitten ready to defend his home, but it’s also more disquieting than Jun would like to admit, because she’s still not convinced that he’s not a fey prince capable of pulling medieval weaponry out of hammerspace. 

 

Like, it’s not probable, but then it’s also not probable that she’d end up friends with a celebrity, and look how that turned out. In any case, any potential grudge matches are stalled out, because Yuuri rests an absentminded hand on Yurio’s shoulder, allowing him to settle before he says, “Well, um… I don’t usually have to explain the figure skating thing?”

 

“Huh?” 

 

Yuuri continues, “I don’t really talk with too many people, and most of my friends are either figure skaters or into figure skating, so when the teacher asked for a fun fact, I didn’t even think to mention it. By the time it occurred to me that you guys might not know, it just… didn’t seem relevant, so I never really brought it up.”

 

Yurio, still bristly, snorts and adds, “It’s your own faults, anyways, for not knowing. He doesn’t have to explain himself to you.”

 

Yuuri still looks anxious, though. His head is down, and he doesn’t quite meet anyone’s eyes. After a moment, he glances up, specifically at Jun because she’s the calmest about this, and asks, “Is… is this okay? Is this going to change anything?”

 

Jun… can’t really see what would change? Like, all this has really done is clear up some confusion about the mystery that is Yuuri Katsuki. But then, there’s the anxiety, and Jun knows that if she were in this situation, she would have almost the exact same fears - that she would have ruined everything and that everyone will hate her for ‘lying’ even if that’s not really true. 

 

So, all she says is, “Everything’s fine, you didn’t do anything wrong. And besides, you’re still Yuuri.”

 

Jun smiles at Yuuri, in invitation. Tentatively, Yuuri smiles back. 

 

Notes:

Since it never gets brought up in the text proper, Isha's full name is Ishani. Also, Yuuri doesn't explicitly state this, but part of the reason he didn't bring up skating as a fun fact is because skating isn't a fun fact, it's life, /duh/.