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42.
That was all that was written on taeyong's wrist from the moment he popped out of his mother's womb. It wasn't even spelled out, just purely numbers.
42.
It haunted taeyong for years once he discovered what the tattoo was for. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't wrap his head around any of the possible answers behind this. What did it mean? Was it an answer to a test? Was it a queue number? Will it be when he is old and frail, playing bingo with other elderly people, that his soulmate will be the one to shout out the numbers? All of them were possible, but in his twenty two years of living on this earth, none of them have happened so far. It was always either a number or two away. It was so specific that there must've been a deeper meaning behind it, right?
"Are you thinking about your soulmate again?" A familiar voice jested, bringing taeyong out of his thoughts. Taeyong threw a quick glare at the older boy and gave a soft snort. Taeil grinned, knowing that he was right about it. "Listen, you'll meet them too one day for sure, okay? For now, you have got to stop spacing out."
"That's what you always say," Taeyong jokingly rolled his eyes, making taeil gently hit him on the shoulder for the disrespect. "and anyway, were you saying anything important?"
Taeil gave an exasperated sigh and nodded his head. "Yes, i was, in fact, saying something important." He grumbled. Taeyong gave him a sheepish smile in return and gestured for him to continue. "My counter stopped just now."
At the mention of stopping, taeyong came to an abrupt stop and took approximately 20 seconds to process what his bestfriend had just told him. Taeil's soulmate mark was different from his, he had a tattoo on his wrist displaying his soulmate's first words to him whilst taeil's was a counter of the number of steps his soulmate was away from him. Once the counter hits 0, it means that his soulmate was right infront of him or touching him. Taeyong, with his mouth was agape, stared at taeil disbelievingly.
"You saw your soulmate?" He whispered. Taeil nervously scratched his nape.
"Well... not exactly," Taeil started but quickly continued before taeyong could say anything. "but i have my suspicions on who it is!"
Taeyong raised an eyebrow.
"You know that kid with orange-ish hair?" Taeil asked.
"The one who's always with that recently-blonde dimpled muscular-looking guy?"
Silence passed between them for a few moments before taeil spoke up again.
"That was pretty specific."
Taeyong shrugged and once again gestured for him to continue on.
"Well.. yeah, i think it's him. Or that guy you just described very specifically."
"Why?"
"Well, i was just minding my own business and walking out of seven eleven like normal when i looked down and saw that my counter was at a zero, so i immediately looked up and the orange haired guy was walking past me and into the store with the recently-blonde dimpled muscular-looking guy following right behind him who was nice enough to recognize me as someone who lives here and gave me a small smile." Taeil made sure to make air quotes at the description that taeyong had made for the other guy.
"So.. what did you do?"
"Nothing."
Taeyong gave an exasperated whimper almost instantly. "What do you mean you did nothing?"
"I mean, i quickly walked, or ran, away before they could realize anything."
His best friend was hopeless, that was one thing he knew with a sure certainty. The urge to facepalm at his antics were enough to drive taeyong crazy, if only a million other things didn't too. He heaved a huge, dramatic sigh and resorted to just shaking his head. He couldn't even imagine letting his soumate go if he just knew who he was... though maybe that wasn't really his choice, since he'd have to consider if his soulmate wanted to stay with him. He couldn't force a person, soulmate or not, to stick with someone with a life like his. Taeil softly pushed him, just enough for him to feel but not stumble, in response but if he had to be honest with himself, he agreed with taeyong.
It wasn't long before they finally reached the lift of their apartment and had to go their seperate ways. They normally walked to and from their school campus together, and it usually took twenty minutes depending on their speed. Taeyong looked down at his watch. Today, they had taken thirty thanks to taeil's story. Taeyong didn't mind though, it's not like it made any difference anyway.
"See you tomorrow." They did their usual goodbye handshake they've had since middle school as taeil walked out of the lift first. He lived two floors below taeyong and just a floor up from his supposed soulmate number one. Number two, the recently-blonde muscular looking guy, lived a floor above taeyong. It's a huge coincidence that they lived in the same aparment building, and that one of them could be taeil's soulmate which meant that taeyong would have to deal with them too.
He secretly hoped that it would not be the latter.
Exactly a week passed since then, and even though taeil didn't really mention it much anymore afterwards, taeyong could sense that it was still bothering him but there really wasn't anything taeyong could do. He could encourage him to go approach the both of them, together or individually, but he knew he himself wouldn't if he was in taeil's place. Especially if he were taeil. The older guy couldn't even talk to anybody who wasn't taeyong properly, let alone his soulmate, a person he was doomed to spend forever with. If awkward were to take the form of a human, it'd be Taeil, but taeyong loves his bestfriend no matter how awkward and hopeless he was. After all, he wouldn't have lived this far if it weren't for him.
So, Of course, you could imagine how devasted he was when taeil announced that he'd be going on a class trip to jeju for two weeks.
Two whole weeks.
Taeyong actually felt his heart sink when taeil broke the news to him, his large eyes staring at taeil begging him not to go because, let's be real, he could never say that out loud. Unfortunately for him, taeil's tickets were already bought and his bags had already been packed before he could refuse so neither of them really had a say in that. As if that wasn't already bad enough, his sister would be out of town too so now he would have no choice but to be on the receiving end of his mother's frustrations whether he wanted to or not.
Don't get him wrong, he loved his mother. What he did not love was the way his mother took her anger on their father out on them when their father was not around, which was always. On the rare days he was around, there house would be full of tension and sharp words subtly indirected by his parents to each other which, as you could guess, almost always ends in a big argument. Taeyong usually locks himself in his room and blasts music from his headphones to drown them out and maybe even come out writing a few songs if he felt like it.
However, what would a hell week be if that's all that happens?
It was the first day without taeil and school was generally okay, his problems usually started after school anyway. What usually took twenty minutes only took him ten minutes now, without all the stops and distractions he and taeil usually had on the way home. Upon reaching his apartment building, his sister came out of the lift with a deep frown etched on her face and bumped into taeyong in the process.
"Oh. Taeyong.." She muttered under her breath, with a tone that clearly meant she was not expecting to bump into him. Taeyong took in how she looked, with a bag over her shoulders and fully covered from head to toe paired with a frustrated expression. It didn't take him long to realize what was happening.
"Where are you going?" He asked, even though he already knew.
"I.." She looked up at him and bit her lip, probably deciding how much she should tell him before settling with, "I'm going over to seohyun's house for a while."
She started to walk away to avoid any more questions but taeyong grabbed her by the wrist and gave her the same exact look he had given taeil, his father and her numerous times. His sister looked back at him and lifted her right hand to cup his face. "I'm sorry." was all she said before pulling her hand out of taeyong's grip and really walking away as taeyong watched her retreating form.
Taeyong didn't take the lift that day. He ran up the stairs to the tenth floor without a care in the world, or perhaps with too much care in the world, and slammed the door behind him.
Jung Jaehyun was, by nature, an extroverted introvert. He loved being with his friends and being the one to crack jokes that made everybody laugh, but there was always a part of him that craved for the silence and isolation, especially when he was reading. His favorite method of isolation was going to the rooftop of his apartment building every evening whenever he was done with his homework or had nothing to study for with a book or two in hand. It was his favorite place other than the bookstore down the street not only because nobody ever thought of going up there so it was perfectly isolated, but it could be anything he wanted. It's vast space with nothing but the sky above him and occasionally birds that take a rest stop was the perfect green screen for the world of the current book he would be immersing himself in. One day he'd be in the streets of El Paso of Texas in the 1980's with two best friends and on another he'd be bustling through the dark alleyways of a fictional city with infamous criminals. He lived for these moments.
In fact, he loved the place so much so that he even decorated his little corner that he always sat at right behind the staircase with a small bean bag and a small side-table he'd place any drinks or food he had to keep him company while he read. It was practically the only company he really desired.
It was to his complete surprise when he got interrupted one day while reading Victoria Schwab's new book with a pretty aggressive and angsty rant from an unfamiliar-but-not-really-because-he-sort-of-heard-it-before voice. Not wanting to reveal his presence so quickly, he crawled quietly to hide himself behind the staircase opening and peeked around the corner. What he saw was even more (pleasantly) surprising.
It was the guy who lived a floor below him, Lee Taeyong. From what Jaehyun knew of him, he was older than jaehyun by two years and was best friends with the other guy who was most likely his best friend's soulmate. They crossed paths a week ago at seven eleven, only for doyoung to notice a few minutes later that his counter was very, very low.
"Jaehyun!" The older had exclaimed in a panicked tone.
"Hyung!" Jaehyun played along, not knowing he was being serious. Doyoung grabbed him by the shoulders and lifted his wrist up. The numbers on his counter were currently fluctuating between 20 to 25. The both of them immediately looked around but it was to no avail because there was nobody else but them in the store and it couldn't have been the cashier because they'd been there several times and his counter would've stopped if it were. That only meant he was outside, so jaehyun shoved whatever he had been holding into doyoung's arms and ran out of the store to look at anybody suspicious, only to come face to face with Moon Taeil whom, upon seeing him looked like a deer caught in headlights, immediately turned around and speed walked away before jaehyun could've stopped him. Doyoung came out a few minutes later with both their stuff paid.
"Hyung, i think i know who your soulmate might be."
"Huh? Seriously? Can you confirm it?"
"There was nobody else walking past here but him, and i think he knows it too because he looked like he was pacing back and forth outside until he saw me." Jaehyun explained, convinced himself that it really was Taeil.
"He?" Doyoung echoed.
"Yes, he as in Moon Taeil. If i remember right, he lives a floor above you which could explain why the numbers are low most of the time when you're home."
A look of hope graced doyoung's face for a second as he started to look convinced by what jaehyun had said too but it disappeared as quickly as it appeared. Doyoung waved it off as coincidence and shook his head. For some reason, the older boy was hellbent on refusing to accept anyone as his soulmate or any plausible reason on why any potential candidates could be his soulmate. Jaehyun pursed his lips in his usual disappointment and heaved a sigh, letting the subject go for the nth time.
Anyway, fast forward to the current times, jaehyun felt bad that he was practically eavesdropping on Taeyong while the other vented out all his problems but there was nothing else jaehyun could do that would not result in an awkward situation between the both of them so, for the best of them both, he stayed at where he was until Taeyong decided he was finished and left.
However, that didn't happen until two hours later.
"Literally the only two people i could depend on and you had to take both of them away? Why? Why the fuck would you do that? It's not fair! Nothing in my life has ever been fair, i've accepted that, ok?"
'You don't sound like you have.' Jaehyun thought but felt guilty right after for thinking so when the other was probably already going through a rough time.
"I know nothing's fair, but do you really have to go and do that?" Taeyong shouted exasperatedly, shaking his fist at, probably, some celestial being in the sky. Jaehyun felt his chest grow heavy with guilt and pity for the other boy as he listened to him. He didn't know all these were things that the other had been going through, and jaehyun wondered how long he must've held all that in. He obviously wasn't the type of person to express his feelings to anybody especially if he had this much pent up anger, frustration and sadness in him.
Jaehyun watched as taeyong shouted until his voice turned hoarse, and eventually plopping down to the floor on his knees and crying until his eyeballs turned dry from all the liquid that had escaped from it. Jaehyun had the strongest urge to just walk over to him to give him a big hug and wipe his tears away, maybe even try to comfort him with words but stopped himself from doing so. When Taeyong got up to walk back, jaehyun quickly hid behind the block of wall with the sound of his heart thumping against his chest so hard that he could hear it. He repeatedly prayed that taeyong did not see him and, after what seemed like forever, gained enough courage to peek out again. He heave a sigh of relief once he was sure that taeyong was gone and slumped in his seat. He didn't get much reading done that day, but he definitely learned a lot.
Taeyong came again the next day, much to jaehyun's surprise because he didn't expect him to, and all the days after that. On the third day, jaehyun brought his headphones to drown out taeyong's rants out of guilt that he was hearing something he wasn't supposed to until he got distracted and couldn't stop thinking about taeyong so he took them off. On the fourth day, he brought a box of tissues, prepared to finally reveal his presence and hand them over to taeyong if he started crying again but chickened out the last minute... and did so for the rest of the days too.
It wasn't until Wednesday the following week that what taeyong had expected to happen, happened.
His father came back after a week of not going home due to a business trip of some sort and it was just their luck that his mother was quite drunk when he did. His mother was passive aggressive when she was sober, and she was full on aggressive when she wasn't.
"So where you've been, huh?" His mother asked the moment his father walked through the door. His father took one look at his mom's drunken state staring at him and heaved a huge sigh, choosing to ignore her.
A bad choice.
"So, what? you've been gone for a week and now you're ignoring me? How fucking typical of you. How very fucking typical of you." His mother scoffed provokingly but his father made no noise as he kept his shoes and walked to the direction of their bedroom. His mother, of course not letting this go, grabbed him by the wrist and glared up at him. His father tried to shake her off until he couldn't anymore and had to look back at her with the same intensity.
"Let. Go." He muttered, just loud enough for them to hear, under his breath with his jaw clenched.
"Let go? No, i don't want to let this fucking go, you hear me? You fucking piece of shit, how dare you have the audacity to disappear for a week and then come back here as if nothing happened and ignore me when i ask you about it then get angry and tell me to let it go? The nerve you assholes have." His mother stood up and slapped him square on the face.
Taeyong had been trying so hard to stay out of their fights, like he always did, and ignore it but one could just simply not ignore the sound of hand hitting flesh. Sure, his parents have fought several times before but never had it gotten so bad that it turned physical. It was never like this. Taeyong has had many heart-sinking feelings, but this time it felt more like the world crashing on his shoulders. It was as though extremely cold water from the arctic poles had just been splashed on him, leaving him numb and dizzy with the sensation. He had to take a sit before he toppled over and attracted unwanted attention from the unwanted scene happening in front of him. Everything went by in a blur after that and all he could remember was them screaming at each other, him gripping the ends of the chair until his knucles went white and his mother leaving the house with packed bags while his father locked himself in the room. It took about at least fifteen minutes for taeyong to put himself together before he decided that he couldn't possibly stay in the house for any longer. Not even grabbing a jacket or cardigan despite the cold temperatures outside, Taeyong ran out of the house as fast as he could and up to his 'safe place'.
Once he came into contact with the harsh cold air of the night, he dropped to his knees and broke down exactly like he did the first time he heard his parents fight five years ago. He hadn't broke down this bad since then, and all the nightmarish thoughts came back to him in waves. Tsunami waves, to be more specific. It wasn't helping that he was at the rooftop either. It took at least two hours for him to calm down and even then, he was still very visibly shaken and extremely exhausted. The breakdown, heavy thoughts and overwhelming feelings weighing him down really drained the life out of him though was there even really any part of his life that he wanted at that point?
"Is this shithole of a hell really what i have to deal with for the rest of my life?" Taeyong's hoarse voice croacked, his body seemingly exhausted from all the crying and shouting he had just done too, but he continued either way. "Tell me! Is this really my life? What does it even mean? What even is the fucking meaning of life?" Taeyong looked up at the sky that, despite the cold air that was threatening to freeze taeyong to death and the depressing events that had just happened, was full of stars. If he didn't know any better, he'd think they were sucking the shine out of his life though what shine he had in the first place he didn't know either. He glanced at his wrist where his tattoo laid before looking back up again. "What's the answer to life, huh?" He asked weakly, but as mockingly as he could.
The answer came unexpectedly. Not to mention, shocked the hell out of him too.
"42."
It took a few seconds before taeyong processed exactly what had just happened and whipped his head around to face the owner of the voice behind the number that had haunted him for years. It was taeil's possible soulmate candidate number two.
"42. That's the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything. I'm Jaehyun, by the way, in case you don't know." He elaborated with a sheepish smile and extended his hand out to taeyong who couldn't take his eyes away from him and sat staring at him without blinking for a few heartbeats before realizing that the other had been offering him a box of tissue. Closing his now very dry mouth, he took the tissue box from the other boy and wiped any tears or snot away from his face as fast as he could because holy shit, he just met his soulmate. What was he supposed to say now? What if in his distraught, he says the wrong thing, and he turns out not to be the soulmate of this person?
Not knowing what to say, taeyong unconsciously started a silent staring competition between them for a few minutes before he finally realized it. He gathered up all the courage and will to live he had left and decided to just fuck it and say whatever came to his mind first.
"Do you come here often?"
If it wasn't for the fact that he didn't want to traumatize his soulmate that he had just met, he'd probably had jumped off right there and then for both the pain and embarrassment. Jaehyun, on the other hand, took it in good stride and though he was taken aback in the beginning because those were the exact same words written on his wrist for the whole of his life, started laughing after processing what taeyong had just said.
"I've always been here." Jaehyun rubbed the back of his nape shyly, and taeyong honestly had never seen anyone look that soft.
And then he realised what jaehyun had just said.
"Wait, what?"
"I.. spend my time here alone to read because it's peaceful and relaxing, as you probably already know," Jaehyun started and waved his hand around the place, ultimately pointing at where he always sat before continuing, "and i really don't mean to eavesdrop on you, i swear, but it just so happens that you come here when i'm here and i never really want to interrupt you nor do i know what to say, so i just... you know..." He confessed.
Taeyong was, once again, speechless.
"Don't worry though, i've been bringing my headphones in recently so i wouldn't hear you and invade your privacy." Jaehyun tried to assure him, holding his hands up in surrender. It wasn't the fact that jaehyun had invaded his privacy or anything, but more of how much the other knew about him. Many of the things he had said at this place were things he had kept in for so long and never told a single soul about. He fet a wave of heat creep into his face as the embarrassment punched him in the gut even more than it already did. Jaehyun, sensing the shock in taeyong and unsure of what he was about to reply, decided that to lessen the awkwardness and carry on the conversation, he should take his jacket off and put it around taeyong who was wearing a singlet despite the harshly cold weather that night.
'How romantic and disgustingly cliche and cheesy.'
Jaehyun did it anyway.
Taeyong, however taken aback by his action, smiled and mumbled a soft thank you. Moments passed and silence befell upon them once more. While Taeyong was deep in thought at what his next move should be, Jaehyun couldn't help but notice the fragrant smell taeyong had now that he was much closer to him. A warm feeling spread in his chest as he realised, or more like hoped, that taeyong's smell would rub off on his jacket so he could, as less creepy as he could, have the scent of taeyong with him until the next time he had to wash the jacket.
Taeyong finally broke out of his trance and, slightly still high on his breakdown, came to a decision that there was nothing left for him to lose. "Since you already know so much about me, do you want to maybe go out for lunch or dinner sometime so i could then, maybe, know more about you too?"
He may or may not have said it in one breath.
Jaehyun's smile practically reached his ears and taeyong now knew why the stars were shining so brightly that night.
"I guess if i say yes, i could finally have your consent to listen to your rants and not feel guilty for hearing it anymore, so yes." Jaehyun joked, causing taeyong to break out into the a huge smile. It was the first time jaehyun had seen him smile throughout his whole time of watching him (if you don't count those times he watched him while he was with Taeil).
"Oh, and i'm Taeyong by the way." Taeyong introduced himself, realizing he hadn't earlier, and jaehyun was just about to tell him that he already knew but stopped himself because that would probably make him look even creepier than he already did so he pursed his lips into a smile and was about to hold his hand out to shake taeyong's hand when he remembered the book in his hand and realised he owed taeyong a more thorough explanation.
"Nice to meet you. Also," He held the book up in his hands to show it to taeyong. "This is The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy by Douglas Adams. I just finished reading it today and what i said just now was from here." Taeyong tilted his head unsure of what he was talking about so jaehyun quickly added on, "I mean, what i first said to you about 42 being the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything. It's this famous quote from this book but it's really good and you should really read it... though i don't know if it's your style-"
Taeyong watched as the other kept talking and let himself smile once again, the feeling in the pits of his stomach and his chest slowly disappearing with every word jaehyun says. For that short moment, taeyong blurred out everything that had happened earlier that day and all the weeks before that and focused instead only on jaehyun. The answer to all the questions he has ever had.
With the moon reflecting it's light on them and the stars shining above for them, Jaehyun couldn't help but feel like it was exactly the perfect backdrop for the start of their story.