Work Text:
"You sure this place is okay? This seems pretty weird...," Mark said apprehensively.
He wasn't really into this otaku stuff, and Hidehiko usually wasn't either, but he had insisted they go to this cafe thing. There were maids there or...something. Mark didn't really get it.
"It is, it's totally awesome. Okay, so they bring you in and stuff, and they call you master, and the girls all wait on you, hand and foot. It's the best," Hidehiko chuckled while he spoke about it, clearly in the midst of his own fantasy.
"If you say so, man...," Mark's voice was obviously hesitant.
Mark did wanna check it out...but all the girls there were just acting, right? They didn't really like you.
Knowing that pretty much killed the idea for him, but at the same time he knew it wouldn't hurt to check it out. There were already there by now anyway, so there was nothing left to do but walk in.
"Welcome home, master!"
Mark had to take a step back – a huge step back – when he was greeted at the door by a maid. But this wasn't just any maid. This was - !
"N-Nanjo!? What the heck are you doing?," Mark could hardly believe what he was looking at. Nanjo was standing before him in a long black dress, a lacy apron, and some frilly looking headpiece. He had never seen anything like it.
Meanwhile, Hidehiko was already making his way in.
"C'mon don't just stand there!," Hidehiko grinned at Nanjo and walked right in, as if it was totally normal.
"Huh? B-But..." Mark looked at Nanjo, who only looked back coolly.
"Come this way, master," Nanjo put on a smile and led Mark to a seat.
"Wh- N-Nanjo, what is this? What are you doing...?," Mark tried questioning Nanjo as they walked, but Nanjo wasn't answering. Instead, once Mark had taken his seat, Nanjo left them, only to return with another maid.
" –– The hell?," Mark could barely get the words out. The maid standing right next to Nanjo was – Nanjo? This couldn't really be happening, right.
"This will be your maid for today. I hope you'll take good care of her."
"The young masters are so handsome! I'm so happy that I get to spend time with you today. All the other maids will be jealous of me!," The new Nanjo grinned as he spoke to them. Mark watched him take a seat next to Hidehiko, still feeling completely blindsided by the whole thing.
With a smile going from ear to ear, the first Nanjo took their orders. Once he left, Mark and Hidehiko were left sitting with the second Nanjo.
"I love games, don't you? I love playing Risk, it's my favorite! Do you guys like board games? We can play one later!," The Nanjo sitting with them smiled and leaned his head on his hands in what Mark could only describe as a cute way. Cute and girly.
"That's game's too hard. Hey, can we play spin the bottle with you?," Hidehiko was smirking while he asked, though Mark was sure that Brown hadn't thought about the possibility that he'd have to kiss Mark if they actually did that...Or maybe he had. Mark could never tell with this guy.
"Eeeeh? That's too embarrassing!," Nanjo blushed and covered his face a little before looking at Mark.
"What about you? What kind of games do you like?"
"Uh...I dunno...," Mark still couldn't figure out what was going on around him, much less what kind of games he liked to play.
"Oh, I see. It figures that you wouldn't be able to formulate a compete sentence, you monkey," Nanjo said with an slightly insincere smile.
"Wh-What? Just hold on a second Nanjo, you know what's going on don't you? You're fucking with me!," Mark yelled and stood up from his seat. Nanjo obviously was in on this! This was some kind of weird joke! It had to be!
"Sit down you ingrate, our meal is here," Nanjo's smile had become a smirk, though he quickly fixed his face to look at Hidehiko again.
"It's time for our special rice-omelette! It's so yummy!," while Nanjo was speaking, he stood up, and around him gathered two more Nanjo's. Mark could only gape while they gathered around the table.
"Let's put the ketchup on!"
All the Nanjos smiled brightly and drew little hearts with packets of ketchup, each one of them in turn, until there were three hearts on top of the omelette. Hidehiko tried to start eating it, but they stopped him right away .
"It isn't done yet! We still have to cast our magic spell! We'll infuse the omelette with our love for you, young master!," One of the Nanjos was speaking, but Mark wasn't even sure which one it was now. His head was spinning and all he could do was watch.
"Are you ready? Do it with us! One – two – three!," All the Nanjos put their hands into a heart shape.
"Moe moe, kyun!," Mark watched as...hearts sprang from their hands and filled the air...? This couldn't be right! But it was all over too soon, and before Mark knew it, there were five, no – no ten Nanjos on a stage at the front of the cafe.
"Everyone! Our show is starting! Please cheer us on with all your heart!"
There was no way Mark couldn't watch. He looked up and saw one Nanjo come to the front.
"This song is for you, you ape. I hope it shuts you up for a moment," This Nanjo had the cold look on his face that Mark was used to, but he was still wearing a maid outfit, just like the others.
Just as the music started, everything began to fade out.
________
"And then I woke up after that, but I swear it was the weirdest dream ever," Mark looked at Nanjo from across the table. He had just told Nanjo all about the crazy dream he'd had, and Nanjo was staring at him more sternly than ever.
"Why in the world you felt the need to tell me about such frivolity, I cannot understand," Nanjo's voice was clearly angry and he seemed to be struggling to keep his cool.
"Come on dude! It was weird, but looking back on it, it was pretty funny!," Mark tried to grin and laugh it off, but Nanjo was having none of it.
"How dare you!? You imbecile! I would never want to hear about something so ridiculous!," Nanjo was blushing as he stood up from his seat.
"Honestly, why would you ever dream of me in a dress? That's - that's disgusting! I would never...," Nanjo let out a frustrated noise and left the table, heading for the door of Peace Diner.
"Hey, jeeze! Don't take it so personally!," Mark got up and followed him, though he was biting back a laugh. It looked like he'd have to apologize, but it had been worth it to tell Nanjo about all of this just to see his reaction. Someday he was going to find something to embarrass Nanjo even more.