Chapter Text
"What if we lost the reason we were fighting for?", Harry whispered while Louis fisted his fingers tighter than he could, knuckles almost turning white.
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Louis still remembers that night, the night that he lost everything, the night when all he had to do was deny the single question Harry asked him, but he couldn't. It was not like he did it on purpose, he had to. He knew what it would bring but he had to, he promised his boy, he promised Harry they would be free soon, just that he didn't know the price he would have to pay for it.
"One stunt for the other", it was not that simple when the head of the the public relations briefed him with. They said like it was the only way out. But at that time, it seemed like the only possible way for him to get out of the contract, to get out of the mess that his previous management left for him. Louis knew that his current team was no good as well, that all they wanted was to milk him for more money and destroy him and his public image but he knew that after going to all this hassle, he could go home to Harry at night. To his safe haven, to his home, who would be there to hold him and assure him that they are going to be okay, but now he went to an empty house and a deafening silence, to a place which smells of him and not Harry anymore, a place that doesn't feel safe anymore, a place that he can't call home anymore, because Harry is not there.
It has been around a few months since they last talked, since he heard that soothing voice that could bring him to peace, the voice that grounded him, the voice that belonged to his Harry. It's unnerving and killing at the same time how just a few rushed decisions can leave you broken and empty. That night when he said that his team decided to bring Eleanor back in the picture, Harry simply lost it. Louis knew, he knew what Harry would draw out of this entire situation, he knew and he still went ahead with it because they promised to get him an out of it, to get him out of the mess that his previous management left him with. It wasn't supposed to be this way though, he was supposed to have Harry by his side, but he doesn't have and he knows that it gets hard, it got the same for Harry as well, and Louis knows it.
Louis is currently on his third bottle of the night, reminiscing the past few months and thinking about his boy-, no, wait, ex-boyfriend, Harry Styles. Can his life get any more pathetic? Here he is, freshly out of a publicity stunt, currently wrapped up in his own filth, a bottle of Vodka wrapped around his fingers while he is trying so hard to not bang his head against the wall. When and why did his life become so messy and complicated?
'since you fell in love with your bandmate', his conscience added.
Just when he is about to drop the bottle and go to sleep, he feels his phone vibrate from somewhere around him and he starts rummaging around to get hold it.
"Switch on your TV", said the text that Liam has sent him.
Louis fought between whether to listen to Liam or simply retire to bed and his trail of thoughts were interrupted when another message came in "Open any news channel", and well, Louis was confused and drunk and so he just wanted to get this over with and fall face down on his bed.
Plopping down on the couch, Louis switched the television on and flicked through the channels before settling down on a decent news channel only for his breath to be knocked down and over because there stood Harry Styles, in all his glory, smiling so big his dimples popping out and the news reader congratulating him on his bravery.
What did I miss?, Louis thought to himself but all his questions were soon answered when he saw the headlines and the word "Coming Out" in Bolds. Harry just came out.
Louis would have been the happiest man on this planet, because his baby finally gets to show the world who he is, he gets to show the world who he has been all along and Louis is happy, he is proud and happy but the curve on his face was soon replaced by a frown when he sees a man wrapping his arms around Harry's waist, whispering things into his Harry's ear that makes his Harry smile and blush. And Louis didn't even know when he grabbed the half-empty bottle of Vodka and just smashed it right at across the television, pieces of glass flying all across the room. He didn't even know when he was being cradled into a warm embrace but he was soon wrapped up in strong arms, while his vision went hazy and blurred.
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Louis woke up with a massive headache and an excruciating pain in his ankle which he didn't even know how he had. Just as he tried to sit up and move, a new wave of nausea hit him and he was so close to hurling out all the contents before an empty bin was handed over to him in no time.
"Thanks", Louis didn't even need to look up to know that it was Liam because who else would it be? It's always him, always Liam who mends his fuck ups, mends him as a whole.
"How are you feeling?", Liam voice a mere whisper as if he is afraid if a time bomb to tick off.
"Been better", Louis shrugged as if he didn't even sense a new wave of nausea hit him everytime he reeled back to the clip of the man holding his Harry by the waist, making him smile came running back in his mind.
"You can talk, you know? You can't always run away from him, Louis. You have to face him at some point of time. He is happy, let him have his moment for once and stop being so stubborn? Harry just came out yesterday, Lou.. You know he needs to listen from you, don't you think he deserves that? Congratulate him, leave him a fucking emoji for all I care. Just... Just talk to him, Louis. It's better for you as well", Liam unloaded all of that at once while Louis was trying to find every possible way to leave the planet, even considering talking to the research centres to send him off to a new planet they discovered.
He couldn't come up with a good reason though and simply replied with a "Will text him, Leemo, now get me a cuppa".
Liam knew better than to fight because Louis agreeing to text Harry is more than a progress that they have acquired since the last few months.
A quick shower and a few bites of toast, Louis found himself sitting on top of the couch, typing away a text for Harry and this is probably the hundredth time that he has wrote and rewrote a simple congratulatory text.