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English
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Part 488 of Dictionary.Com Word of the Day Drabbles , Part 36 of One shots - Gibbs centric: bastard
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Cutsycat's NCIS-drabble lj collection
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Published:
2017-03-17
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152
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1/1
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10
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18
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1
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Ascetic

Summary:

A look at Gibbs' austere life and why that is. Also a lot of self-recrimination on Gibbs' part.

Notes:

Another dictionary.com word of the day drabble. This time from 09/01/2000 for the word ascetic.

ascetic
One who renounces material comforts and practices extreme self-denial, especially as an act of religious devotion.
Pertaining to or characteristic of an ascetic;extremely strict in self-denial; austere;severe.

This is for the ncis-drabble community on LJ's challenge: #188 Pessimistic.

As always comments, kudos, and constructive criticism are greatly appreciated.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Ascetic

Gibbs had long ago decided to be an ascetic. He’d made that decision after he lost Shannon and Kelly. It was his way of paying penance for failing them. That decision also marked his fall into pessimism.

He no longer saw hope. He only saw how the world continually failed everyone. He tried to right the wrongs that he could, but he knew that what he did had a minimal effect at best. Technically he hadn’t given up all material comforts, but he had given up most of them.

He slept on his couch instead of a bed. He refused to allow himself to have a relationship that might succeed. He refused to allow himself anything that brought him joy. He only participated in work and his boats. Both of which were penance for failing his women. Pessimistically, he refused to believe that he could be happy again after losing them.

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