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You could feel the blood seeping out of your ribs underneath your shirt. You winced a bit, before straightening up, hoping the others didn’t notice your lapse of composure. Shifting uncomfortably, you crossed your arms, squeezing as hard as you could to stop the blood flow. In retrospect, it probably wasn’t the best idea to cover this up. Had you not been wearing a dark colored jacket one of them would have noticed already. At first you didn’t think the wound had been that bad, so you figured you could just suck it up for a little bit. But now your pulse was starting to throb louder in your ears as your blood continued to flow forth. You could just say something, but that would defeat the whole fucking purpose of avoiding it to begin with. It was only a little farther to town, you could see the tops of the larger building cresting the horizon in front of you. Why did your luck always end up like this? The other four were completely unscathed, actually they pretty much enjoyed themselves. Fighting demons was practically just exercise to them, after all. Gojyo and Goku were too busy bickering with each other to pay much attention to you at the moment, and Hakkai and Sanzo were in the front and couldn’t see you. You took a deep breath. Only a little longer…
---
Unsteadily, you stepped from the back bumper of the Jeep. You hung back slightly as three of your companions made their way inside the inn. Hakuryu transformed and fluttered to rest lightly on Hakkai’s shoulder, who you then realized was giving you a strange look.
“Are you feeling alright? You look a little pale.”
“I’m.. fine. Maybe a little tired. Let’s go.” The two of you walked into the inn after the others. Sanzo and Goku were already seated at a table, and Gojyo looked like he was already flirting with one of the waitresses behind the bar. Sanzo’s little reading glasses perched on the bridge of his nose as he leafed though a newspaper he had managed to procure from somewhere. He took a deep drag off of his cigarette before resting it on the edge of the ashtray.
“I’m almost out of cigarettes.”
“I can pick up a carton for you, I was just going to say I was going out to the market for some things.” Hakkai smiled. Sanzo grunted and pulled the gold card from his sleeve and handed to Hakkai.
“HAKKAI! Get lots of super delicious food, okay?” Goku was practically salivating at the thought.
“Stupid monkey, you’d eat it all before we even got to look at it. Will you shut up?”
Hakkai just chuckled and awkwardly rubbed the back of his head.
“Hakkai, I’m coming with you, alright? It might be nice to look at some of the food first before Goku gets to it.” You smirked. As the two of you started back out onto the street, you stumbled slightly, causing Hakkai to reach out quickly to stop you from falling. The problem was, he had caught you by the back of your jackets arm, which was drenched in blood. He pulled his hand away, stopping suddenly when he saw his hand was red. You’d never seen him look so confused. Your cheeks felt hot, you were sure that you didn’t look pale anymore. You grabbed his forearm and hauled him outside and around the corner of the building into a small alley.
“Why is your jacket covered in blood?!” He sounded genuinely concerned.
“I’m sorry, Hakkai, I was just waiting for a chance to speak with you alone. Not that I only wanted to use you for your healing chi… well actually, at the moment that is exactly what I need.” You glanced over his shoulder out at the people bustling by on the busy main street, using his torso to shield yourself from view. You shrugged out of one side of your jacket, taking the bottom of your shirt by the hem and pulling it up across your smooth abdomen til it almost came to your breastbone… only, part of it was still sticking to your ribs. You hissed as you peeled the sticking fabric away from the wound, causing several new trickles of blood to cascade over your already stained skin. You looked at Hakkai, who was just staring at you with his eyebrows raised, as you stood there awkwardly in a dingy alley with your shirt hauled up over your breasts.
“…..Hakkai? Uh… I’d consider it a great favor if you could maybe, stop the bleeding at least?”
“Oh! I’m sorry, just….. Why didn’t you tell me before?” Hakkai hastily rolled his sleeves up to his elbows and started to conjure an orb of glowing chi energy. “Have you really been bleeding for almost an hour?”
“What can I say? I’m a trooper, I guess.” You tried to smile at him but he was frowning now. He cupped his hands against your side and slowly started to press the energy against the wound. You groaned slightly at the sensation, it felt like searing cold was entering your veins at first, sparking out in every direction away from your open flesh. You felt the cold tendrils snake to the center of your chest and pulse slightly before beginning to subside. Taking several deep breaths to steady yourself, you looked down at your ribs as Hakkai started to draw his hands back. Your skin was still marred with dried blood, but the gashes were now just angry looking red scars.
Gingerly, you started to pull your shirt back down. “Thank you… please, don’t tell the others.”
He was shaking his head exasperatedly. “That’s still going to be sore for a while. You need to rest. Please, go back into the inn and lie down so I don’t keep worrying over you. I still don’t understand why you didn’t speak up before we even came into town.”
You sighed softly and stared at the grainy stone wall.
“Because I’m too proud, and I didn’t want that damn priest to see me looking weak.”
---
You were coaxed slowly awake by the tang of acrid cigarette smoke that was wafting through your second story window. You moaned softly as you passed your hand over your face, rubbing your eyes. Hakkai had convinced you to go back into the inn to clean up and attempt to rest. Apparently you had ended up succeeding in taking a nap after all. Sitting up, you looked out the window. It was dark out, though the blue velvet of the night sky was filled with stars and a bright crescent moon. You could see some more smoke drifting lazily up to the window you had left open next to the bed. Cautiously, you leaned against the windowpane and looked down over the edge. You could see a crown of golden hair shining eerily in the moonlight. Sanzo. Of course. You sighed.
He must have heard you, because the halo of blonde hair tilted back and suddenly his angular face was staring up at you. He took a drag off of his cigarette and you could see the orange flare from the ashes on the tip.
“That was some stupid shit you did.”
“What?”
“Don’t play dumb.” He looked back out at the street. “Hakkai was kind enough to inform me of your recklessness.”
“That bastard. I’ll kill him.”
“Don’t count on it. I’m going to kill you first, you idiot, though it’s no surprise you didn’t die already.”
“Why does it matter so much? Did he tell you why I didn’t say anything?”
Sanzo took a minute to answer. “Yes.”
He didn’t elaborate. He didn’t need to.
---
“Sanzo… she did it because of you. She didn’t want you to think she was weak. She respects you, and I suspect she cares about you a great deal as well. She wants you to think of her as she does of you, though she’d never admit it.”
“That fool. She could have died.”
“Perhaps…. I think I’m beginning to see her greater meaning, after all…”
---
“Just forget it, Sanzo. I fucked up. I should have just played the weakling to begin with.” You watched as he flicked his cigarette butt into the dirt and ground it out with the toe of his sandal before turning around and going back into the lower floor of the inn. Awesome. You considered your status with the priest to be fragile at best, and you were pretty sure this was some kind of gigantic step back from what little progress you felt you had already made. He could be such a bastard.
But that was just one of the many reasons you found yourself caring about him so much, wasn’t it? He was like you in many ways, which was part of the reason you gravitated towards him. He hated caring about other people, he was proud, he didn’t give a shit what anyone thought about him or his status. The two of you had shared booze several times while trying to ignore the chaos emitting from the rest of group you traveled with. If you tried hard enough, you could fool yourself into thinking you shared a bond with him, after all.
You sat back down on the edge of the bed, not sure if you should be embarrassed or just pissed off, when the door opened and Sanzo stepped in, still scowling, carrying a bottle that appeared to be liquor and two small glasses. You were going to scowl back but you were too intrigued. He set the glasses down on the table and poured a fair amount into each one.
“Don’t ever do that again.” It wasn’t a request, it was a demand. One you were willing to follow, as much pride swallowing as it might take on your part. He handed you a glass. “Drink.”
You both knocked back the amber liquid at the same time, and the burn it left in your throat was a welcome distraction.
“What--” Whatever question you were going to ask him was suffocated as his lips crashed into yours with such startling fierceness you almost forgot to kiss back.