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John tried to be cute and nice about it, honest to God he did. It had just made him snap, and it really wasn't his fault that Sherlock was a deaf moron oblivious to John's plights.
It had started at eight in the morning, a respectable time to be waking up in the good doctor's opinions. Sherlock, of course, had still been asleep, so John had decided he would go and wake him up in the cute way people do in relationship's. He'd started off with little whispers of sweet nothing's in Sherlock's ear as he straddled him on the bed. "Good morning, my love." he whispered, continuing by commenting on some nice murder cases he'd found that morning, along with his opinions on the weather. Sherlock had no response.
John sighed, a teensy bit frustrated, but deciding to move on. He bent down to Sherlock's stomach and lightly tickled it. Not even an eyelash fluttered. John started tickling him more and more, laughing out loud to himself as he saw Sherlock's arm twitched. He was having an excellent amount of fun, right up until Sherlock's leg spasmed straight into John's crotch. The doctor rolled feebly off the bed in pain as he whimpered, hating the sound of the snores resuming that told him Sherlock had gone back to sleep.
He got up and tried a sweeter approach, bending down over his lover and lightly brushing their lips together. He made sure to keep his body turned away from kicking distance as he kissed Sherlock on the lips once, twice, three times. John moved his lips upwards, tracing Sherlock's magnificent cheekbones before he kissed his ear slightly. He moved his lips back down until he reached Sherlock's neck, and he made a trail of kisses go down to the top of Sherlock's shirt. John was lost in his thoughts and the immense joy kissing Sherlock brought to him before he was snapped out of his enjoyment by a particularly loud snore.
The poor doctor snapped.
None of his efforts at waking his bloody boyfriend up had worked, and the only thing he had to show of his troubles was a painful crotch and one very asleep partner. John reached over to grab the pillow from underneath Sherlock's head. he had one idea left which might wake Sherlock up. And by George he was going to wake the lay bugger up. John started to hit his partner repeatedly, extremely hard, whilst yelling his head off. "WAKE UP YOU LAZY ARSEHOLE HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TRY AND GET YOU OUT OF BED BEFORE YOU DO IT YOU ABSOLOUTE BASTARD IF YOU DON'T GET UP RIGHT NOW I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL POUR A BUCKET OF FREEZING COLD WATER OVER YOUR HEAD YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG I'VE BEEN TRYIG TO WAKE YOU UP FOR I'VE GOT THE BLOODY SCARS TO PROVE IT!" Sherlock grabbed hold of the pillow John was using as a weapon and looked up at his partner with extremely tired, and extremely confused eyes.
"What?" he croaked out.
John just sighed, kissed his lover on the nose, and went to make a cup of tea.