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Recently, when Anissina-chan invites me over, I get a completely different feeling than before. It’s scary, nerve-wracking, but also exciting, exhilarating—
After I woke up and got better, Anissina started experimenting on me.
We kind of have to do it in secret, because the first time the Young Master found out, he totally flipped out. Sure, I appreciate his concern for such a lowly soldier like me, but he definitely over-reacted. I think Anissina-chan might have even been a little hurt by that, even though she looked normal on the surface. Did he think she would really hurt me? Pfft. She’s harmless. I mean, His Excellency the first son grew up with her, and he’s still alive, isn’t he?
Personally, I think growing up with the second son was more dangerous.
Besides, the Young Master should really learn to let go. I can’t remember how many times I’ve told him already: I’m fine, I’m fine. Sure, I’m not back to a hundred per cent yet, and no one can say for sure I’ll ever be back to the way I was. So what? Just one of life’s little obstacles. I can survive perfectly well on eighty per cent.
Anissina-chan takes off her lab goggles and looks pointedly at my legs, or what’s left of them. “I think that’s closer to seventy-five per cent.”
“Once you get the peg leg done, I’ll be eighty-five.”
“I can do a lot better than a stick, y’know.”
“Of course I know that, but wouldn’t a peg leg make dressing up so much more fun? Ooh, or cowboy breeches with knives as the heels. Sharp and sexy.”
“Gurrier, your carefree attitude never ceases to amaze me.”
I preen a little. It’s quite an accomplishment, to be able to amaze that Anissina-chan. “Well, there’s no use crying over spilled goat’s milk, is there? I rather think this gives me more flavor.”
“You’re definitely one for people with… heavier tastes. Anyway, that’s not what I called you here for.” Anissina beckons me over to the operating table, where a large sheet is covering something unmistakably humanoid, and unmistakably dead.
“I hope you’re not doing anything illegal here.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. Do you think I’d show you if I was?”
“Aw, I thought you trusted me more than that.”
She waves me off, and pulls away the cloth with a flourish. The person lying naked on the table is a young girl. She looks around my age, with a dainty frame, fair skin, full breasts, bright orange hair the color of the sunset—
I tilt my head. “Y’know, she looks a bit like my sister, if I had one.”
“And you don’t, so she’s supposed to look like you, idiot. What do you think? Like what you see?”
“Anissina-chan, despite what you might have heard about me, I’m not into that sort of thing—though I know a couple of people who are.”
“Get your mind out of the gutter. I’m asking, what do you think about this body? Didn’t you always want to be a girl?”
No, no, that’s a misconception spread by a certain deceased human fugitive lord— but I won’t say I never considered it. “How does this even work?”
“Well, after you got yourself turned into an undead vegetable puppet in Seisakoku, the link between your soul and your body weakened, didn’t it? It’s the same as when we put your soul into that doll.” She slaps girl-me’s forehead with the back of her hand. “If you’re willing, I just have to press a button here and suck your soul into this body instead.”
That’s Anissina-chan for you, she never wears baby gloves for anybody. Maybe that’s why I enjoy her company so much. “Is there a return ticket included?”
“It’s temporary for now, but if you like it, I can stabilize the connection and make it permanent.”
I clap enthusiastically. “As expected of Anissina-chan, you’ve completely outdone yourself.”
To my surprise, she lowers her gaze. “I know you just asked me to make a new pair of legs… but this way, you can be whole again.”
True, I never thought that would be possible either. And it’s not just my legs – that new body has perfect, unblemished skin. I look down at my own body, and the scars scattered like stars.
This would be way more effective than any beauty cream.
In the end, I decide to take the new body out for a test run.
The eyes that stare back at me through the mirror are exactly the same shade as the ones I’m used to. I clear my throat and try some vocal exercises. Damn, that voice takes me by surprise. It’s almost two octaves higher. But it’s not unpleasant to listen to, I guess.
I glance sideways at the mirror. It’s strange to see the body I’ve used for the past century lying there on the operating table instead, but it’s not the first time, so I’ll deal. And at least Anissina-chan was considerate enough to put it – me—in a hospital gown this time. The dress is one of those ultra-efficient designs that His Eminence brought from Earth. I still don’t quite understand what it’s supposed to cover, but I get the feeling some of my regulars would appreciate the help wearing something along those lines.
As for the girl’s body I’m currently wearing, Anissina-chan prepared a simple but sweet white dress. No bare buttcracks for this body. I guess men and women aren’t really that equal after all.
“Are you sure you don’t want a different outfit? I have some that might fit.”
“Anissina-chan, I love you and I think the world of you, but if there’s one part of you I don’t have confidence in, it’s your fashion sense. It’s just not my style, y’know?”
Besides, I got plenty of outfits at home that I’ve been dying to try. They never fit me properly before, but now I’m cautiously hopeful.
Anissina purses her lips. “Fine. But before I can let you go, how do you feel?”
“Hmm… pretty good, actually.” I twist my waist here and there to get a better feel of this body. Though it looks small, the muscles are actually rather well-toned. There’s quite a bit of strength in these arms, though of course not nearly as much as I had in my own biceps. I spent years training those babies, so I’d actually be kinda upset if that could be so easily overcome in a lab.
That reminds me, I don’t think I want to ask how she made this body. As they say, ignorance is bliss.
I try running on the spot, and nearly lose my balance when I lift my new leg. It’s so light, so flexible… so easy.
Walking. Apparently it’s one of those things you didn’t miss until it’s gone.
“Is it okay?” Anissina-chan looks strangely nervous for a moment, like a child showing her report card to her parents. I guess it’s the first time she tailor-made something like this for someone. This technology could change everything. Or maybe she’s just worried for me, after all.
I flash her my biggest grin. “This is great, Anissina-chan. I’m going to have a lot of fun with this.”
The moment passes, and she’s back to being the infallible Anissina-chan I know and love. Picking up her clipboard, she gestures at a row of machines at the back of the room,
“Great. Now perform some tests for me, and get to it. We haven’t got all day.”
After a few hours of testing the limits of this body’s physical and mental capacity, I finally give Anissina-chan the slip.
At first I felt kinda bad—after all, she’s the one who gave me this body in the first place. But then I realized there’s no way I could have escaped if Anissina-chan was really intent on keeping me there, and I relaxed. Oh, that Aninssina-chan, as un-straightforward as ever.
With her implicit permission, I start my adventure as a girl.
First of all, I have to say, this chick is quite cute. I turn a lot of heads just walking down the corridor, and revel in the attention. Well, I shouldn’t be surprised. I mean, she was modeled after me, after all, and I’m the most beautiful—
“Hold on there, young lady.”
Hmm? That’s no way to get a girl’s attention, y’know. You’ll never get yourself a girlfriend like that. The soldier even grabs my delicate wrist forcefully.
“Hey, how did you get in here!? Do you have permission?”
Of course I do, the Young Master gave me express access to anywhere I please. And besides, according to His Excellency Lord von Voltaire’s orders, it’s my job to get where I wasn’t allowed to go.
But of course, all my ID is on that other body. Silly me, I really should remember to transfer these things next time.
I cough slightly and try out that pretty voice again. “M-mister, I’m s-sorry but I think I got lost…”
“What’s the commotion here?”
A familiar deep voice cuts through the hullaballoo. Ooh, here’s my first test subject.
“Your Excellency!” The soldiers back away from me and stand at attention.
The crease between my boss’ eyebrows deepens again. “Who is this young lady? How could you let just anyone into the palace!? What if she’s an assassin!?”
I almost feel offended that such a lovely little girl could be suspected like that, until I remember that not too long ago, a lovelier littler girl did in fact sneak in and attempt to stab our beloved young king. Okay, fine, as soldiers we have to suspect everyone and anyone. But you still failed, Your Excellency.
I beckon him over shyly, and he obeys almost out of instinct. He really is hopeless when it comes to cute things. When he bends down towards me, I give him a quick peck on the cheek.
He turns a shade of red even brighter than Anissina’s hair. It’s the ideal reaction.
“Y-You—” Even his voice is shaking. Ah, but that’s no good, he’s frowning again.
I stand on my tiptoes to flick his forehead with a perfectly manicured nail. That reminds me, I have some wonderful nail polish at home that would look great with this skin tone.
“Lighten up, boss, or you’ll scare away your kitties.”
“Wha—” Gwendal vol Voltaire stumbles backwards, his hand clapped to his forehead. “That insolent manner of speaking…! Is that… is that really you, Gurrier!?”
“The one and only.”
“I thought you looked familiar but… what happened to you!?” And before I can explain, he takes off in the direction I came from. “Anissina! Oh, she’s done it this time, that guy will surely lose it—Anissinaaaaa—!”
See? He cares deeply for her, after all.
Lord von Voltaire had been my boss for almost thirty years now, and he still couldn’t tell a thing until I deliberately made it clear to him. That’s actually kinda cool~ Just thinking about the pranks I could pull off with this, I almost can’t help whistling to myself.
After that I go off in search of His Majesty, just to see his reaction, but he isn’t in the study when I poke my head in. Instead, I see His Excellency Günter teaching the would-be assassin turned princess.
Not two minutes later, I have the dreamiest guy in Shin Makoku, who was voted ‘Man I’d Most Like to Marry’ ten years in a row, chasing me down the halls while screaming ‘no-good, scheming, seductress!’. Hey, it’s not my fault that the Young Master still seems to prefer women. If you really think that’s not fair, why don’t you ask Anissina-chan for a new body too?
Anyway, His Majesty seems to be slacking off again. Next, I check the Shinou Mausoleum, where His Eminence is still paying back for the promise he made. For once, I get easy access into the temple, lucky~
I’m still eyeing the priestess’ uniforms, trying to figure out if it’s worth ‘borrowing’ some, when the double black with glasses pats my shoulder.
“Gurrier, right? Close your mouth, you’re drooling.”
I rub my mouth with the back of my hand. Nah, it’s not worth the trouble. I wouldn’t be able to walk five meters in the marketplace without a bunch of people swarming me for advice. “As expected of Your Eminence, nothing gets past you. But how could you tell?”
“Would you believe me if I said I can see right into your soul? It’s a very pretty mandarin color.”
“You overheard the soldiers talking about it, didn’t you?”
“Some of them have very confused boners right now.”
I laugh out loud, and the sound surprises even myself. It’s nice and tinkling, very pleasant to the ears. Around me, the priestesses turn around to smile at me. “Your Eminence, watch your language! This is a holy place, y’know.”
The boy smiles as well. “You’re not one to lecture me about my language. And Gurrier?”
“Yes, sweetie?”
“I preferred your old voice.”
His Eminence sure says the strangest things sometimes. Somehow he dampened my sprits a little, but I was determined to at least try on those clothes I couldn’t fit into last time.
So I make a quick trip back home to bathe, put on that nail polish, wait for it to dry, and then figure my way around the frilly, lacey dress with silk ribbons that I bought off the shelf in Van Der Via…
By the time I leave my cottage again, it’s already sunset, and I’m feeling vaguely overdressed.
Ah, well. I’ll just get better at it next time.
I open my parasol, and stroll daintily into town. First I drop by my bar, much to the envy of all my regulars. If Anissina decides to continue this, she’ll make a killing. But I can’t linger long—I want to catch the Young Master by surprise.
I wonder, will he like these new heels? It always seemed to kill him inside that I couldn’t wear them anymore.
My progress is slower than anticipated, probably because of all the guys trying to chat me up. It was fun at first, but when it seriously starts to get in my way, I take the smile of my face and change the mood around me to one of danger. It’s a bit like a tamer version of Lady Cheri’s warrior of love-mode. Bring able to create different auras is a useful trick to have on my missions, though it’s slightly harder to pull off today. Usually I just have to flex my guns slightly.
Suddenly the crowd parts a little, and I spot two hooded figures at a fruit stall.
Ah, Young Master. You still have a lot to learn about disguise.
I sidle up behind them, the sound of my heels muffled on the ground. Tch, it seems I’m still not so used to this body after all… or am I just not used to walking again? In the past, there would be no sound at all, just like the ‘linjas’ His Majesty told me about.
Either way, it’s enough for me to sneak up behind the Young Master without him noticing. The person next to him is the third son, but even he can’t react fast enough to stop me grabbing the king from behind.
I put my hands over His Majesty’s eyes, and pull his head into my breasts.
“Hi there, honey.” I purposely make my voice even sweeter than before. There’s no way he can tell it’s me like this. “Guess who?”
“...Gurrier?”
…huh?
I don’t get it. And His Majesty isn’t the only one – the third son isn’t reacting either. The famously jealous and over-protective Little Lord Brat is just standing there with his arms crossed, looking rather disgruntled.
If any other stranger had ambushed the king like this, his sword would be at their throat by now. So he knows it’s me too.
“How…?”
“Hehehe, I got it right, didn’t I?” The Young Master pulls my hands away from his eyes, turning around with a grin. “You can’t fool m—Whoa! Who are you!?”
I don’t know whether to cry or laugh anymore. “It’s me, Young Master. You were right.”
“Ehhh? What happened to you!? But wait—you’re a girl!?”
“Before that,” I press a finger to his lips, and got a glare from his fiancé. “Can you tell me how you figured out it was me, without even looking? And my voice is different too.”
He mumbles a bit, wide-eyed, until I take away my finger. “I don’t know how to put it… but I can kinda see without seeing? Something like that. Something about your footsteps, or maybe the way you raise your tone at the end of the sentence when you talk? Oh, and you’re the only person I know who would do something like cover my eyes, except maybe Greta or Lady Cheri.”
What is he talking about? I don’t understand. “How can you be sure I’m someone you know?”
“Because if you really were a stranger, Conrad would have stopped you before you got to me.”
I turn around to see my old Captain smiling kindly at me. That’s low of you, tricking your way back into His Majesty’s absolute trust like that, after all that happened. I pout even more when I realize what that meant.
The one who truly saw through me first, without me doing or saying anything, without me even being aware I was watched – is that man.
I feel as though I’ve been defeated again, especially when I stand next to that man and realize that my head only reaches his shoulder.
“And that’s why you’re returning this body so fast?”
“I haven’t been shorter than that guy since we were forty. Just looking up at his smug face makes me want to punch him.”
“As expected of childhood friends. He even recognized you in an instant.”
I run my fingers over my smooth arms for the last time, sighing. I’ll miss such perfect skin, but if that man can wear his scars like prizes of war, so should I. After all, I was right beside him in almost every one of those battles.
“I can easily make your body taller, y’know.”
“But I also like being able to toss the Young Master over my shoulder in emergencies, and have him admire my guns.”
“Are you saying girls can’t be strong and have muscles?”
“Sure they can, I never beat you in an arm-wrestling match, now did I? But in that case, how’s it any different from having my old body back?”
She looks at my chest.
“What, these? They just get in the way. Where else can I hide my pigeons if the bra cups are full?”
Her gaze falls even lower, all the way down to—my legs.
“That’s no big deal. You’re gonna make me new ones, right?” I lie back down on the operating table, and close my eyes.
Besides, that is also a souvenir from the field. It’s a symbol of my failure, but also of our growth.
Just like with everything else I ever did, I’ll overcome it. Just you wait and see.