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He could hear her, banging on the motel door. He knew the devil’s traps and charms wouldn’t keep her out for long. She had found him. There was no escape. He had no way to stop her, the demon killing knife wasn’t with him, he’d left it with Sam when he’d run off. Even if he’d had the knife it wouldn’t do any good against her the only thing he had that could harm her was a small vial of holy water and that would barely slow her down. He heard a loud crack and knew it was the devil’s trap outside breaking.
Fumbling he grabbed at his phone in his pocket. He had to call Sam, warn him. She’d go after Crowley in the bunker next. Sam was in danger. He dialed the number and placed the phone to his ear but the voice than answered wasn’t the one he’d expected.
“Hello?”
Dean faltered. “Cas?” He was dimly aware that the numbers he’s put into the phone were not Sam’s they were Castiel’s... why had he done that?
“Dean?” A pause then, “What’s wrong?”
Well it was Cas now, no time to call Sam... no time for anything. “I’m sorry Cas, I’m so sorry... for everything.”
“Dean? Dean, what’s happening?” Castiel’s voice was kind, more kind than he deserved.
More banging, the charms on the door would give at any moment, there wasn’t time. “It’s Abaddon, she’s here, she found me.”
Cas’ voice was desperate. “You need to run Dean! Get out of there now!”
“I can’t. There isn’t time, it’s too late.” They were both silent for a moment. “Cas... she’s either going to kill me or possess me. If she possesses me I need you and Sam to-”
“No, Dean. You’re going to be ok, we’ll figure this out, you need to hang on!”
“CAS I CAN’T!” Dean tried to calm himself, he just... he couldn’t anymore, this was it, he was done. “If she possesses me I will be dead. She will go after you two and kill you both. You can’t let her do that, no matter what she looks like, that won’t be me.” He needed Castiel to understand...
“No.” It was firm and angry and Castiel sounded so much like the angel he had once been. Hearing it made Dean ache in ways he didn’t understand.
Dean sighed, defeated. “I’m already dead.”
There was another loud crack and the door flew open. This was it. It was over. And something insane inside of Dean broke free, there was nothing left and there was no reason to hide it. There was a reason he’d called Castiel instead of Sam.
Hands shaking and heart beating near out of his chest, Dean clung the phone by his ear and uttered the last words he would ever say “I love you, Cas.” As the last word left his mouth the phone was flung from his hand and he felt himself slam into the back wall.
Abaddon surveyed the room, she smiled up at her prey. Dean glared back and opened his mouth to curse at her, but she made a small clawing motion with her hand and he felt the breath catch in his throat. He struggled to breathe but found he couldn’t.
Castiel was screaming into the phone now. “Dean! DEAN! Answer me!”
He heard a sound like the phone being moved, then, a smooth female voice answered. “Hello lover, how are you doing?”
“If you hurt him, I will track you down and-”
“Now now, is that any way to talk to a lady?” She chuckled. “I wasn’t planning on hurting this gorgeous hunk of man meat. No. I had something special planned for him.” A small shuffle on the other end of the line, he heard what sounded like Dean choking.
“DEAN!” Cas didn’t know when he’d fallen to his knees but he found himself staring at the floor of his room in the bunker aware dimly that the carpet under his fingers was growing steadily wetter.
“Calm down, lover, He’s fine. Aren’t you, Dean?” A sound like gasping and loud smashing, an involuntary cry of pain. Castiel could imagine Abaddon slamming Dean into a wall the plaster cracking under the force of the blow.
“Please, stop, let him go, I’ll do anything.”
“Sorry lover, but you don’t have anything to bargain with.” Another loud crashing noise this time there was no cry of pain. Castiel choked on a sob. “Could you just give me a minute, I just need to change into something a little more comfortable.”
“No, please!” But he heard the phone land on the ground followed by what sounded like Dean choking and screaming all at once.
Castiel was shaking, his eyes wide, vision blurred. “No. No no no-”
A deeper, gruffer voice picked up on the other end of the line. “Lover? You still there?”
“Dean.” Castiel sobbed out.
Castiel heard the same chuckle from before, but now it was in Dean’s voice and it sounded wrong in every way.
Castiel leaned back, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling. He knew Dean could still hear him, he had to. “I love you too Dean.”
Abaddon said nothing. The line was dead for a few moments. Then, resolved, Castiel added. “We will save you, hang on... for me.” Then he hung up.