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It’s not that Finn didn’t want to shag her. Honestly, to have a girl crawling all over him might have been worth the rejection he faced from Jess. But, honestly, with the way the girl was all weepy and draping all over him while he was in the hospital bed—the fucking hospital bed, for Chris’s sake—it took a team of nurses to drag her out. He didn’t mind the sex, if only she had just waited for him to get out of these bloody tubes and gown.
Finn felt the white line of his scar on his chest. When he woke up to bright lights and beeps—and a loud girl wanting to jump his cock—he couldn’t remember what had happened. It was only after he was left alone to his own thoughts that he remembered what had happened to him.
If it weren’t for Rudy pinning after that Nadine girl, none of this would have happened. He supposed the real reason why he was so pinned up on her wasn’t just because Rudy liked her—it may have something to do with God.
Don’t get Finn wrong, Rudy was the absolute last person he expected to go to God for help. Hell, he couldn’t even say all of Hail Mary correctly. But, in any case, he had found something in that girl that made him find God. Probably to fill that empty space in his heart and figuring out what to do with his imaginary life.
Finn laid there in blinding fury—if it weren’t for fucking Rudy and that fucking nun, none of this would have happened. But he calmed once he remembered something important: he saved Jess. Well, the doppelganger, at least. Surely that had to account for something right?
“Finn?” a nurse popped her head in. “There’s someone here to see you.”
A smile immediately brightened his face. It had to be Jess. Finn saved Jess Too's life. He literally stepped out in front of a blade for her—he was Jess's knight in shining ar—
“Heya.” Abby poked her head out between the curtains. Finn adjusted to prop himself onto his elbows—or, at least tried to. Ouch.
“Shit,” she said, her eye brows furrowing. “That must have hurt like a cunt.”
“Well, thanks for pointing out the obvious.” Abby’s expression didn’t change as she leaned in closer. Finn moved back in exchange.
“Whoa,” she said. He examined her eyes as they did that weird bright blue-thing whenever she looked through objects. “It’s all red and squishy in there. You’re lungs looks too big for your body, though you are a small man.” She looked up, her blue irises normal again. “Do you think if you breath too much, it’ll just pop-” Finn flinched “-like a balloon?”
“Shut up, would ya,” he snapped. “Don’t go freaking me out and giving me a heart attack, okay? Or I’ll have you hauled away by me nurses, too.”
Her eye brows shot up – if she were a cat, he imagined her with cat ears that would perk up. “‘Too?’”
“Yeah, there was this girl practically climbing up all on top of me, begging to sex her up. It was feckin’ weird.”
“And you didn’t jump on the offer?” She looked almost thoughtful, in that weird, whimsical way of hers. “Though I suppose she jumped you-”
“Okay,” he interrupted. “Thanks for that. Why are you here anyways? Where’s Jess?”
“Oh, she’s with Alex from the Bar.”
“Ungh.” Great, Finn managed to make himself a hero, and Jess just shits all over him to be with that asshole.
“Oh, but not to worry, I’m here.”
Finn stared at her as she blinked. He still wasn’t sure whether she was being serious or not. Was she being serious? He shook his head. “Look, I don’t care. I just want to be left alone.”
“Ah,” she said, nodding. She leaned forward again. “To wallow in your grief. I understand. But next time you want to grow some balls, and get over being all sad and shit, let me know.” He stared her with wide eyes as she leaned back again. She grinned softly. “Maybe I’ll bring a pie.”
When she had finally left, he laid there, staring up at the ceiling. What the hell was so special about Alex? Beside the fact that he was, admittedly, pretty sexy for a guy the gang once thought was gay. Finn sighed. Fucking Christ, he was so done with this shit. Just once he wanted a girl who he liked to like him back.
_
When Finn finally limped back into the Community Center, he was greeted with the others staring through the glass doors, leaning against their various brooms.
“Finnley! Glad you could make it.” As soon as Rudy spoke, the others twisted their heads towards him.
“Yeah, no thanks to you guys,” he grumbles, which was collectively ignored. They all turned back to stare at the boys. Finn crunches up his face. “Why are there Scouts here?” Once again, he was ignored when Rudy spoke up.
“You know,” he started, “the…the first time I ever masturbated? Scouts! The first time I ever saw another boy’s penis? Scouts! The first time I touched another boy’s penis? Scouts. The first time another boy touched my penis-”
“Scouts?” droned Jess.
Rudy made a face. He didn’t mention how the boy who imagined him was indeed a Scout. The thought of that boy also being the penis he saw and touched kept him quiter than usual.
Finn moved away, rolling his eyes. He wasn’t even surprised that Jess didn’t look at him. Slowly, he limped his way to the room he and Rudy shared. Surprised, he stumbled when he saw Jess’s doppelganger.
“Hey,” she says, smiling softly. Her voice is quieter than her counterpart, less harsh. She doesn’t have that edge to her that the other does.
“Um, hi.” He waits as she directs her attention back to Finn’s flat screen. “Um, this may be a bit forward, but, um…why are ya in here?”
“Watching some telly,” she said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
“Oh,” he said awkwardly. “Uh, okay.” He shuffled around to his dresser, pulling out some clean clothes. He’s felt like shit since he woke up, and surely a nice, clean shower would do the trick.
“Hey.” Finn looked over to the girl who looked exactly like the girl he loved, yet completely different. “I’m sorry about everything that’s been happening between you and Jess. She just doesn’t understand that not everyone’s out to get her, ya know?”
Finn didn’t vocally respond, but his mind was screaming at her. Why was it that she was with Alex, then? That two-faced asshole who cheated on her? Why wasn’t she with him, the guy who actually saved her life and nearly died for it?
Ah, fuck it. It wasn’t worth it anyways.
“Thanks,” he said. His towel and clothes collected, he went towards the door, then paused. He turned toward Jess’s other half, who was pretending to watch the screen. “Hey, do ya mind if I ask you something?”
“Sure,” she said, sitting up straight.
“If you and Jess are, you know, kind of like twins or something, does that mean that what you’re saying now…if Jess were one whole person..that this would be what she might have said to me? In some alternate time line?”
She was quiet for a moment before smiling sweetly at him. She looked sad. “I suppose so, Finn.” She turned back to the screen, deflated and blank.
When Finn left, she sat there for a moment, thinking about what he said. In another life time, she might not have existed. Who knows?
She sighed and flipped the telly off. She didn’t feel like watching it anymore.
_
When Finn finally has all his clothes off, as soon as he turns the knob to rush the hot water down, he hears the door opening. Expecting to hear Rudy or Alex, he only hears silence and footsteps. Freezing momentarily, he cast his gaze behind him.
“Hello?” he calls. “Rudy, if that’s you, I’m not in the fucking mood. And if this is Alex, fuck off. I’m really not in the mood for your shit.”
More silence. He sighs, shutting off the water and wrapping a towel around himself to step out. As soon as he did, however, he was nearly ambushed by some girl.
“What the Jesus FUCK-” He wiggles his way from the stranger’s grip and recognizes the same loony girl from the hospital. “Oh, my God. You’re that nymph!”
“Emma,” she said out of breath. “I was being about before serious – you need to fuck me.”
“Get the hell off of me,” he said, shoving her off of him. In doing so, she grabs his towel and pulls it off of him. Reflexively, he sups his crotch, flabbergasted. “Wh-what t-the-”
“This is important,” she urged, moving towards him.
“What the fuck could be so important that you’d rip me towel off?” he nearly shouts at her. She blinks, then tears brim in her eyes. Finn was angry, but seeing a girl cry always brought him to his knees. He sighed. “Okay. Okay, I’ll be nicer. But ya gotta let me in on why you want me cock.”
_
Girls being Scouts was a disgrace, however the one that was flirting with him at this particular moment was quite the cutie. Rudy had moved on from Nadine, though he would never forget his 100th shag: the Nun.
The girl managed to run into him in the locker and he stared at her tits more than her badges. She was quick to notice and slid in a comment about her sex badge. Though she was only kidding, he made the ingenious remark that he’d made her very own badge if they sexed it up. Much to his excitement, she agreed.
Tying him up wasn’t an unfamiliar kink to him, and even the pentagram didn’t set him off. However, the fact that there were a crowd of little boys around him while he was just in his underpants finally gave him a clue. Something about the whole cutting off a chicken’s head and having a dozen of boys looking at you practically naked (which reminded him way to clearly of what his Scouts years had been like) kind of set him off. He wasn’t the most graceful at combating, but who knew that if you just flailed your arms and legs like a jellyfish and squirmed around, they just stared?
“What the fuck?”
Rudy craned his neck around to see Finn at the door with only a towel on.
“Hey there, Finnley,” Rudy said. “Look, I know you’ve seen me in worse situation, but could you be a chap and untie me so that I don’t become an agent of Satan?”
“What?” Finn said, a girl behind him rushing in also. Well, she kind of rushed in, then fell, breaking her nose onto the floor.
“Fuck,” she shouts.
“Is she an agent, too?” Rudy asks. Behind the pain, the strange girl glared at him and flipped him off.
“I hate to break up this lovely reunion, but I’d rather get this wrapped up,” Keith said, sounding bored. “We do have other things to do tonight.”
“No fucking – no fucking way, man,” Rudy said. "I am not turning into your poppet. Finnley, are you going to help me or just stand there and witness me becoming possessed?”
“I’ve got this,” the girl said from behind her bloody hand. Limping over to the pentagram, she snatched the candle and tripped on her own foot, again, and tossed the candle up in the air. The fire landing on the Scouts leader, his pant leg engulfed in a flame.
Dropping the chicken, Keith howled in pain as the young Scouts watched. Falling to the ground, he writhed on the floor as he tried to roll it out, and only ended up making it spread.
“Okay, well, this has been fun,” Rudy said as Finn rushed to pick Rudy up by the arms. Emma picked herself up, clutching her ribs as well as her broken nose. Limping together, Rudy saluted them as the Scouts glared.
Keith held onto the chicken, letting the possession sweep out of his body in a swarming back and red mixed mass, like flies and blood. Entering the opening in the neck where the head once rested, Keith stayed in his position, burning as the light left his eyes.
A moment later, the headless chicken twitched its wing.