Chapter Text
The Clik-Clak was starting to stink. Not metaphorically—Mae still enjoyed going for the sub-par pizza and feeling of familiarity—but very literally: the air was permeated with a mix of onions and body odor, evidence that some of the younger customers thought that just because it wasn’t sweltering outside they didn’t have to put on as much deodorant, ignoring the fact that once they shed their winter clothing it was like five stink bombs were set off at once. And in a confined space like the run-down diner, the stink spread quickly.
Mae wrinkled her nose and gazed out the window next to her booth. Snow was falling in fat flakes, covering the sidewalk in a thick layer of cold fluff. Mae watched in contemplative silence; sometimes, if she tried really hard, she could make out shapes in the snow. She could see an outline of a snake, a diamond, an arm…
An arm.
Mae snapped her eyes shut and drew in a deep breath; it had been a month and a half since the Mine Incident, and she was still haunted by what had happened down there. She could swear she still heard Eide’s screams—
“Hey dude, are you gonna eat?”
Mae opened her eyes and looked at Gregg; he was seated across from her, his head tilted in mild concern. His snout was splattered in pizza sauce, and his usual leather jacket had been traded out for a baby blue sweater Angus had gifted him for Longest Night. Mae shrugged and pushed her plate towards the center of the table.
“I was, but I’m not really feeling it now. You can have my half of the pizza if you want.” She propped her head up on her hand and watched as Gregg nodded, took her half and rolled it into a tube before taking a massive bite, careful to avoid dripping sauce on himself. Mae snorted before frowning. “Gregg, do you ever think about the mine?”
Gregg stopped chewing, furrowing his brow as he tried to come up with a half-decent reply. “Well, yeah, I do sometimes. There’s nothing we can do, though, y’know? It’s better to focus on the present. Try not to think too hard about that stuff.”
Mae pursed her lips. “That’s easier said than done, dude.” She looked down at the table. “I keep having nightmares about it.”
“Aww, dude!” Gregg whined, putting his pizza down. “Have you talked to anybody about this? You really shouldn’t keep that junk to yourself!”
“I know, but I mean. How can I even bring that up to anybody? You’re trying to move to Bright Harbor with Angus, and Bea is so distant lately…” Mae trailed off before heaving a sigh and forcing a smile. “It’s not that big of a deal though, I mean if I handled dreams about some unknown murderous entity by myself for a week then this is no problem. I’ll get over it in no time.”
“Well…ok, but you know you can always talk to me.” Gregg stated, flashing a toothy smile. Mae snorted and nodded.
“You got it. Hey, how’s the moving plans coming along anyway? D’ya have your stuff packed yet?”
Gregg perked up, his mouth full of another bite of tube-pizza. “It’s going GREAT! We got all the spare things packed, so we’re just living off of essentials now. Angus has been a real sweetheart the whole time; I think he’s really happy to start a new chapter of his life with me.” His smile was contagious now; Mae smiled back. “We started talking about plans on how to get you a place near us, too, since you asked forever ago. Angus has been keeping an eye out for a place, but our main concern is just getting there first.”
“Well, lemme know if you guys need help or something.” Mae replied, still smiling. Gregg nodded enthusiastically, flapping his arms quickly before settling down.
“I’m just so excited, bro. I can’t wait to be better off with Angus. I love him so much, it’s nuts!” Gregg was practically squealing at this point. Mae snorted, her smile starting to fade as an unfamiliar feeling pooled in her stomach. She glanced at the clock on the wall and stood up.
“I gotta go home bud, it’s been real. I’ll see you tomorrow?” She asked. Gregg grinned and finished the tube-pizza in a huge drool-spilling bite.
“Definitely, dude! See ya!”
Mae placed her part of the pay on the table and waved as she left; the cold air blasted her, causing her to shiver and zip her coat to her chin before starting her long walk home.
--
“Mae? Is that you?” A gruff voice called out. Mae scuffed her shoes on the floor mat in front of the door and hung up her coat.
“Yeah, it’s me.” Mae entered the living room and leaned on the wall next to the couch; her dad was watching Garbo and Malloy again. He looked over at her with a smile.
“Hello, kitten. How was your dinner with Greggory?”
“It was fine. We talked about his moving plans with Angus more.” Mae rubbed her arm, wrinkling her nose. Her dad looked at her, puzzled.
“What’s wrong, Mae? Are you just sad Gregg will be gone?”
Mae laughed a little and sighed. “Yeah, a little. I think I’m gonna go to bed, I don’t really feel like processing big emotions right now.”
Her dad nodded, giving her a warm smile. “Alright. Sleep well, dear.” Mae nodded back and went upstairs; she pushed her bedroom door open and plopped onto her bed face-first.
“Ugh,” she groaned. “Why do I feel so shitty? I knew they’d be leaving soon. Why’s it hitting me this hard now?” She rolled onto her back and waved her arms at the ceiling. “Hey, I know you don’t care about your job, but you really suck for making Gregg have to leave.” She stared at the ceiling for a minute. “…Never mind, I know you have nothing to do with it. A God who hates their job isn’t behind anything.”
Mae rolled onto her side, frowning and hugging her pillow. She thought back on her conversation with Gregg, trying to memorize it, since it was one of the last they’d have for a while; she was really going to miss his pizza-tube feats of amazingness. She smiled, but froze as she remembered the stab of unfamiliar emotion that coursed through her when Gregg fawned over Angus.
“Well…I guess I must be dying.” Mae mumbled. “Maybe I really was hungry or something…” She shrugged and relaxed, eventually slipping into a deep sleep.
--
A cat is looking for prey in a cave; he clutches at his side, his face twisted in fury and pain. He licks his lips and looks at the ceiling; it’s too dark to see anything. A dripping sound echoes through the cave, and his ear twitches with each drop. He turns and looks straight on, a low growl rumbling up his throat. He parts his lips in a snarl.
“M A E B O R O W S K I.”
Her eyes snapped open; Mae dragged a hiss through her teeth and sat up in bed. She couldn’t focus; her bed lost its details and looked like a red rectangle. Mae swallowed her panic and focused on the tree outside of her window, trying to ease her breathing. She absentmindedly began to untangle herself from her blankets, letting them fall to the floor; the air was dry and cold in the attic, causing her to clear her throat.
“Hey, tree,” She mumbled, rubbing her eyes. “How’re you today? Good? Good. Oh, how am I?” She laughed suddenly, then stopped at the absurdity of it. “Same old, same old. Nightmares. Boredom.” Feeling calmer, she looked at the tree a bit more before nodding at it. “Good talk, buddy.”
Mae got out of bed and was pleased to see that some details had returned to her room; her doctor called them “dissociative spells”, but Mae couldn’t care less what they were. She only cared that they sucked. She looked down at her feet and groaned; she’d fallen asleep with her shoes on, which wouldn’t be so bad, but it meant there was dirt in her bed that she’d have to deal with later. She straightened her shirt and plodded to her mirror to check her hair; her reflection spooked her a little, as always. Her eyes were red, but that wasn’t a shock—the bags under them were. She frowned and rubbed her eyes extra hard. When she took her hands away, the bags were still there.
“What am I, a cat or a raccoon?” She grumbled. She stuck her hands in her pockets and sighed. “Well, time to face the day. You got this, Mae.”
--
Learning to trapeze a telephone wire is much harder than it looks; it requires strength, perseverance, and plenty of falling down. Luckily, Mae had a good sense of balance, and was proud to admit she’d never fallen off the wires she treaded on, which was a particularly good thing to be proud of since the wires were close to fifteen feet off the ground, and slipping off would result in a Mae-shaped pancake. Mae knew this, and continued to do it against her mother’s wishes, but not out of spite for her; she wanted to feel free and rebellious while enjoying the fact she was still physically able to do it.
This is why it came as a shock when Mae almost fell off, startled by a sudden yell.
“Hey Borowski, what’re you doing up there?”
Mae lost her balance and yowled; she grabbed onto the electrical wire, looking more like an inchworm than a cat now. She looked down and saw Selmers sitting on her front steps. The bear was watching her, a slight smirk playing on her lips. Mae huffed.
“I was walking here, you jerk!” She struggled to the previously passed electrical pole and stood up on it, shaking from her brush with possible death and definite injury.
“Yeah, looks like it.” Selmers called back. She was full-on smiling now. “Can you come down? I wanna ask you somethin’.” Mae rolled her eyes and flexed her fingers, trying to see if she had rugburn.
“Alright, gimme a second.” Mae answered. She looked around and decided to just climb down the pole; she was as careful as she could be, but something poked her palm on the way down. “Ouch!”
“You ok?” Selmers asked. Mae nodded and jumped off the pole, landing in a huff. She stood in front of Selmers, rubbing her palm.
“Whatcha wanna ask me, Selm-Selm?”
Selmers blinked.
“…Sorry,” Mae said sheepishly. “Whatcha need?”
Selmers smiled slightly and shook her head. “Don’t be sorry, I just…wasn’t expecting that.” She pulled out a small flip notebook. “I was actually wondering if you could maybe help me work on a new poem, since you seem to like them so much.”
Mae perked up. “Oh! Sure, I’d love to! Speaking of, do you have any newly finished ones?” Selmers shrugged.
“It’s pretty short…” She trailed off as Mae’s smile grew in anticipation. Selmers cleared her throat and flipped to a different page. “This one’s titled ‘Taco Depression’. Ahem: Taco shells aren’t meant to fall apart. Taco Buck, you’re breaking my heart.”
Mae laughed. “That’s hilarious! How’d you come up with that?”
“My taco shell fell apart while I was eating yesterday afternoon.”
“…Oh. Well,” Mae waved her arms in the air for emphasis. “I think it was still pretty good.” Selmers laughed.
“Thanks, Mae. So, when do you wanna come by to help me?” She tucked her hands in the pocket of her sweatshirt, settling into a comfortable spot; Mae suspected that if she wasn’t expecting help,
Selmers wouldn’t move for the whole day.
Mae hummed for a moment. “How about after I go hang out with Beatrice? Does this evening sound good?”
Selmers nodded. “Yeah, that’ll work. Thanks Mae.”
Mae waved her goodbye and skipped up the hill, excitedly wondering what Beatrice was up to. She hadn’t spoken to Mae much since the Incident, but Mae was determined to crack her shell one way or another. She burst into the Ol’ Pickaxe, a fist on her hip.
“BEA-BEA!”
Beatrice looked up, wrinkling her nose in minor annoyance. “Hey, Mae. What’re you doing here?”
Mae sauntered up to the counter and tried to look cool by leaning on it with one arm; she failed. “I was just wondering if you’d like to hang out today; I know a cool place you haven’t been to yet, and I’d love to show you, but it’s a surprise!” Beatrice looked unamused and continued working; Mae frowned and stood up. “What’s wrong?”
“I have a lot of work today, Mae. I can’t leave.”
“Aw, c’mon!” Mae whined. “We haven’t hung out in ages.” Beatrice sighed and started counting the money in her till. “Would you consider it if I spoiled the surprise and told you?” Beatrice didn’t look up; Mae pursed her lips. “It’s called Jenny’s Field; my mom took me there after I came back. It’s really peaceful, and I think you’d love it. It’d be a nice change from your usual busy-body self—” Beatrice huffed and turned to look at Mae; Mae realized how tired Bea looked and took a step back, her happy demeanor replaced with one of concern.
“Mae, I can’t hang out today. I have work, unlike you. I don’t wanna put up with your shit today.” Mae raised her eyebrows, her lips parted in a gasp that wouldn’t come. That hurt.
“I…um…ok. I…I’ll go then.” Mae backed up, and Bea’s face changed. She pursed her lips and closed her eyes.
“…I’m sorry. Maybe this Saturday we can hang out? I’m just really busy.” Bea gave Mae a sympathetic smile, and Mae gave a hurt one back.
“…Sure.”
--
Mae knocked on Selmers’ door, her teeth chattering from the sudden temperature drop; she pulled her jacket around herself tighter. The door opened and a sudden wave of warmth washed over Mae, who welcomed it.
“Hey man.” Selmers smiled. “Thanks for coming.” She moved aside to let Mae in, who practically materialized inside from the quickness of her movement.
“N-no problem! Wow, it sure does smell good in here. Are you guys baking cinnamon rolls?” Mae licked her lips; Selmers laughed.
“Nah, that’s one of mom’s wax melts. We don’t typically bake sweets in here since dad’s hypoglycemic.” Mae tilted her head in confusion, prompting Selmers to continue. “That means he can’t really have a lot of sugar. It spikes and makes him a bit of a jittery jerk.”
“Oh, ok. Sorry for prying.”
Selmers walked to a door leading to the basement and held it open, bidding Mae to go first. “You aren’t prying, dude. You just don’t know things.” She grinned. Mae smirked and went downstairs; she stared at the room before her. There was a mattress pushed against the wall, a ratty blanket draped on it; a writing desk took up most of the space, even though it was pushed against the opposite wall. There were balls of paper littering the floor, along with full blank sheets; ones with writing were taped up on the wall above Selmers’ bed, showing a year or so of hard work. The only light in the basement were strings of Longest Night lights hanging from the ceiling.
“Oh my god? Selmers, this is…this is really cool.” Selmers wrinkled her nose.
“Really? I always thought it was too cramped. Cool though.” She walked across the littered floor and sat on her bed, picking a notebook up off the floor. She motioned at the chair by her desk, and Mae gladly took a seat. “Alright, so, I wanted help writing a poem about how life definitely is outside of Possum Springs. So I wanted your input.” Mae began to laugh.
“Oh man. Oh boy. Oh jeez. You came to the wrong person. I didn’t experience much in college, Selmers. I barely left my room.” Her laugh began to sound hollow as Selmers visibly deflated; Mae wrung her hands before following up. “Well…maybe I have some knowledge. What all do you need?”
Selmers shrugged and tapped her pencil on her notebook. “All you gotta do is just…talk. Just tell me about your life outside of here. I’ll turn it into a poem, and I’ll present it to you and the Poetry Club when it’s done.”
“Oh! Ok. I can do that. Well, um. There was a lot of parties, and a lot of drinking. People broke up with each other a lot…”
Mae and Selmers worked for a few hours before Selmers decided to take a break; she went upstairs and came back with a pair of Fiasco Colas. Mae accepted with a polite indifference; they drank in silence for a moment.
“Hey, Selmers,” Mae said quietly. “Why don’t you have a bedframe or something?”
Selmers sipped from her cola for a second. “I dunno, I don’t like comfort much anymore. After my stint in jail for the opioids, I kinda…don’t think I need comfort.”
Mae nodded. “Well, I mean. You do. You know that right?” Selmers only looked at Mae before finishing her drink. Mae chugged hers. “…I think I’ll leave, you seem tired. I hope I was helpful.”
“You were, actually. A huge help. Thanks.” Selmers said. As Mae started walking up the stairs, Selmers pursed her lips. “You deserve comfort too, Mae.”
Mae stopped, but didn’t look back; she stayed that way for a few seconds before starting the climb again. As she exited the house, Mae took a shaky breath; she knew she deserved comfort, but it was easier said than done, especially with what happened the past few weeks. Mae began her long walk home, and started regretting not owning a bike or something; walking this much was starting to get old. Out of the corner of her eye, Mae saw a dark shape move; she whipped around, flashbacks of Eide in her mind. It was only a newspaper fluttering in the wind. Mae clutched at her jacket and walked a little faster, ignorant to the man watching her from a few yards back.