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Rey woke with a jolt as she sensed someone else in her room. Even half-asleep she managed to grab her staff and scramble to her feet. The intruder was to the left and she swung her staff at head-height. There was no resistance, no feel of her weapon connecting with a body. She put her back to the wall with her staff in front of her. There was a figure limned in a strange blue glow standing in the centre of her room. It looked like a human and he was holding his hands out in the universal gesture of 'I'm not armed'.
Rey levelled her staff. 'Who the kriff are you and what are you doing in my room?' she demanded.
The figure kept his hands up. 'Sorry, I didn't really think you'd be able to sense me. No one else has.'
'So you thought it was fine to come into my room in the middle of the night? Who are you?' Rey repeated. She was still a little disoriented from waking up, but she was pretty sure she'd be able to fight off one unarmed intruder.
'I'm... I'm Ani,' said the figure.
'How did you get in here? Are you Resistance?'
'No, I'm, well, I was a Jedi. I died and now I'm... here, like this.' Ani took a slow step to one side and waved his hand through Rey's desk. Through the desk, without a hint of resistance, just like with her staff. Rey relaxed fractionally. If he couldn't touch things, he probably couldn't touch her. And he'd said he was a Jedi.
'What are you though?' she asked. She wondered if she was dreaming.
Ani shrugged. 'I guess kind of a ghost. I can't touch anything and no one around here seems to be able to see or hear me at all. You're the first one that has.'
Rey lowered her staff a little. 'And you're a Jedi?'
'Well, I was a Jedi,' said Ani with a wry twist of his lips. The rueful expression made him look younger. 'And I can sense the Force in you.'
Rey sighed and set the end of her staff on the ground. Yes. I've got the Force. Maybe that's why can see and hear you? I know where you are even if I'm not looking.'
Ani looked down at her desk and shrugged. 'Maybe that's it. What do I feel like?'
Rey shrugged. 'I don't know how to describe it. You're just there. You try describing a sense you've always had.'
Ani looked back up at her and smiled. 'That brings back memories.'
'So why are you sneaking around my room in the middle of the night?'
Ani grimaced. 'Well, I sensed someone strong in the Force and I came to have a look. I really didn't think you'd be able to see me.'
'But didn't you think that if I was strong in the Force, maybe I could see you?'
'I don't have a great track record for thinking things through,' Ani muttered.
Rey huffed a laugh at his sulky expression. 'Okay. Do you want to start over? I'm Rey.'
'Hi Rey, I'm Ani.' He grinned at her and she couldn't help returning the expression.
'Good. Now it's the middle of the night shift, so how about you go away and come back in the morning.'
'Okay. I can do that,' said Ani. He gave a tentative half-wave and turned around and walked out of her room. Through the wall. Rey blinked and after a moment she put her staff back beside her bed. Then she got back under the covers and wondered if Ani would be back. It didn't feel like she was dreaming, but it usually didn't at the time.
///
Ani was back the next morning. A glowing blue hand appeared through Rey’s door and waved at her. She heard Ani speak, the sound oddly distorted by the door or by distance. ‘Hello again. I’d knock but, you know…’
Rey smiled despite herself. ‘Come in,’ she called.
Ani passed through her door. ‘Sorry about last night. Again.’ Rey shrugged and sat down on her bed. She was ready to go, but liked to wait until the first shift meal was nearly over. It meant there were less people around and she could pile her plate with whatever was left after the popular food was gone.
‘What do you usually do at night?’ she asked. ‘Do you sleep?’
‘Kind of. I can sort of turn off my awareness for a while when I want, but I don’t need sleep or anything.’
‘What’s it like being a ghost?’
Ani grimaced. ‘Boring, mostly. Difficult sometimes when you can see that something’s about to go wrong and you can’t help. How did you end up in the Resistance?’
Rey wondered where to start. It was a long story and even if Ani couldn’t really do anything, she wasn’t comfortable relating everything that had happened to her. ‘I… lived on Jakku for a while, as a scavenger. Then I met a droid who knew where the last Jedi was. Then I met a Resistance member, only he wasn’t Resistance, he was a defector from the First Order. Do you know who they are?’
Ani nodded, his expression clouding over. ‘I know who they are.’
‘Right, well then we decided to get the map to the Resistance and along the way I found out I was Force-sensitive.’ Rey fell silent and glanced over at Ani. She wondered if he’d press for details.
‘Jakku?’ he asked.
‘Yes?’
‘Isn’t that a desert planet?’
Rey blinked. ‘It is.’
Ani gave a half-smile. ‘I grew up on a desert planet, Tatooine.’
Rey raised an eyebrow. ‘That was before becoming a Jedi?’
Ani waved a hand. ‘Yeah. What’s the worst heat stroke you ever got?’ he asked.
Rey grinned, not at all bothered by the change of topic. ‘The worst? That was definitely early on. I didn't have a full canteen and I was rationing it between scavenging sites. Obviously I wasn't doing a good enough job, because then I went to stand and my vision just went dark. I drained the rest of the water and went back early. That was a bad one.’
Ani returned the grin. ‘Huh, I don't think my vision ever went, but there was that time when I stood up and then just fell straight back down again. Nearly cracked my head open.’
Rey winced in sympathy. ‘Nasty. What was the worst time you got caught out at night without warm clothes?’
Ani launched into a story about being kept out longer than he’d intended in only one layer. This was a lot better than talking about the big things, like Jedi and destiny. Rey wouldn’t say she missed Jakku, not exactly, but here was someone who got it. Who knew what it was like to burn and freeze and eventfully reach a kind of understanding with the desert.
They exchanged stories for a while until the comm on Rey’s belt beeped, letting her know it was time to go to the mess hall. She was still adjusting to having a schedule that she hadn't made. ‘I’ve got to go and get food.’
Anakin nodded. By his expression it looked like he understood how important it was, even with what she didn’t say. ‘Do you want to talk again later?’
Rey got up and made sure she had everything she wanted. She still felt uneasy about leaving behind the rations she’d hidden under her mattress, but so far no one had taken anything from her room, even with how close everyone lived to everyone else. ‘Absolutely. Next morning? I always get up earlier than I need to.’
‘The coolest part of the day,’ Anakin said with a nod. ‘I did the same thing for about a year after leaving Tatooine.’
Rey flashed him a smile. He returned it and gave a little wave as she left. ‘See you tomorrow then.’
///
Rey and Ani developed a routine. He visited every morning and they talked. She got the feeling that he was being careful not to push for more of her time or for more of her story. In return she didn’t press him either. Every so often she’d mention the Jedi in case he wanted to tell her about them, but he’d just change the topic. Rey was okay with that. She would have changed the topic if he’d asked her about her experiences with the Force.
‘All the food here is so bland,’ she complained one morning.
Ani grinned at her. ‘It took me ages to work that one out. None of the food here's going to be fortified with extra salt because they're just not losing it as much.’
Rey raised an eyebrow. 'Oh. So should I just add more to my food?'
'Depends, are you getting muscle cramps?' he asked. 'Like in the arms or legs?'
'Not really, why?'
'Your muscles cramp up if you're not getting enough salt. My legs used to seize up a lot at night. I thought it was the training, but it turns out I was just used to more salt than what I was getting. If you're not cramping you don't need extra salt. Give it a few months and it will start being less bland. Your taste adjusts automatically.'
‘Was that when you were training as a Jedi?' Rey asked.
Ani looked down at his hands. 'Yeah. It was.'
‘What was it like?' The question slipped out before Rey could stop it. Finn was getting better every day and the medical people said he’d be awake soon. She wasn’t going anywhere until she could talk it over with him. Not even to learn how to control the Force. But she knew she’d have to seek Luke Skywalker out sooner or later and it was weighing on her.
‘It had its ups and downs. It was better than the desert. Most of the time.’ Rey nodded, but didn’t say anything just yet. ‘There were a lot of us. I liked learning to fight with a lightsaber and learning to use the Force was okay. Meditation was pretty awful though. It’s going to be different for you, though.’
‘I know,’ said Rey. ‘Is there… could you tell me anything about how to use the Force?’
Ani’s expression froze for a moment. He glanced away. ‘Maybe don’t use it until you have someone who’s good at it. I wasn’t… I wasn’t a very good Jedi.’
‘Oh.’
‘But especially don’t use it when you’re angry or scared.’ Ani looked back at her. 'Not that I'm complaining, but why are you sticking around here instead of going to find Luke?'
Rey frowned. She'd mentioned her plan to find the last Jedi, but not many of the details. She felt she owed Ani some information after he'd talked about the Jedi. It was obviously his least favourite topic. 'My friend is here. He's the stormtrooper that defected from the First Order and he got pretty badly injured fighting back. I'm not leaving until he wakes up.'
Ani nodded, a distant look in his eyes. 'I'm not surprised he defected. Stormtroopers have always been treated pretty badly. I tried to help a bit, back in my time. Get the higher-ups to stop seeing them as replaceable parts.'
Rey nodded. She wasn't surprised that Ani had looked out for stormtroopers. 'Did it do any good?'
Ani gave her a wry smile and shared a few more details about his attempts.
///
After breakfast, Rey made time to visit Finn in Medical. Her conversation with Ani had left her restless to see Finn again. She was alone there except for patrolling doctors who had their own work to do and largely ignored her. It suited her perfectly. She knew that Finn couldn't hear her, but she hoped he'd be able to sense her. Rey had always been able to tell when there were other people around and familiar people had a distinct feel.
She was just about to pull out her datapad when a familiar presence wandered in. Leia came and took a seat next to Rey. For a long moment there was silence between them as Leia watched the steady rise and fall of Finn's chest.
'How is he doing?' Leia asked.
'Good, I think. The doctors say he'll wake up before long.'
Leia nodded. 'Have you given any more thought to going after Luke?'
'Yes. I'm not leaving here until Finn wakes up. No matter what.'
'I understand that he's your friend and very, very important to you. He clearly feels the same way. He was the most vocal about coming to rescue you from the First Order.' Rey gave a tight nod. She knew that. That was part of the reason that she would never abandon him.
Leia gave her a long look. 'However, there may not be a lot of time. The First Order has been rebuilding their strength. You should get as much training in as possible.'
'I will,' Rey said. 'As much as possible after Finn wakes up and I tell him where I’m going.'
Leia snorted. 'Right. You know, there are things we could do. You could leave a holo recording to explain it to him, write a note, or have one of us tell him on your behalf. We could even send him after you to Luke when he wakes up, if you like and he agrees.'
'I'm not leaving him and nothing you tell me is going to change that fact,' said Rey.
Leia opened her mouth to respond, then closed it again. She ran a hand through her hair. 'You remind me a lot of me at your age,' she finally said.
'Do I?'
Leia gave her a wry smile. 'Oh yes, you're almost as stubborn as I was.' Rey found herself returning the smile. 'Look,' Leia continued, 'I'm obviously not going to try and force you because you'll just dig your heels in. But if you think of anything that would get you to Luke quicker, you let me know.'
Rey nodded. 'I will.' She meant it.
'Good, good. I guess I'll be getting back then.' Leia gave Rey a vague pat on the shoulder. She was one of the few people Rey felt comfortable being touched by. It was probably because Leia was always really clear and obvious when Rey sensed her so there was no way she could sneak up on her.
Rey hesitated for a moment, debating whether to bring up her new friend.
'Was there something else?' Leia asked. She sounded genuinely interested and maybe even a bit concerned.
'There was, actually,' said Rey. 'Do you know of any Jedi that supported stormtroopers back in history?'
'Clone troopers,' Leia corrected. 'The Jedi worked with Republic clone troopers back in the days before the rise of the Empire. "Stormtrooper" is a newer term coined by the Empire. There weren't many Jedi around by then.'
Rey frowned. She was certain Ani had said 'stormtroopers' and he'd definitely implied that he'd been working with them. 'No, I'm pretty sure it was stormtroopers...' She paused for a moment. 'Wait, were there any Jedi in the Empire?'
Leia's expression went hard and flat. 'There was one Jedi that betrayed the Republic and everything they stood for. If you can even call him a Jedi.' At Rey's questioning look Leia sighed wearily. 'I suppose you have a right to know about him if you're going to train with Luke. He's... relevant.'
///
Rey stormed into her room and rounded on Ani as soon as he appeared. ‘You’re Darth Vader!’
He flinched and took a step back from her. ‘It's not like that.’
Rey scowled. ‘So what is it like!? Why are you here? Are you trying to turn me? What do you want from me!?’
Vader held up his hands, even though he didn’t really have a weapon, couldn’t really hurt her. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t say anything, but this is kind of why. I was… Vader, but I’m not anymore. I’m not him. I don’t want to turn you. I hope to the Force you don’t fall! It brought me nothing but pain.’
Rey sneered. She wanted that to be true. A part of her was insisting that this was Ani, who'd talked about food and heat and drinking yourself sick in this strange place without enough salt and way too much water. Another part of her knew just how fast people could turn on you, how you couldn’t trust anyone to watch your back, especially if they weren’t honest with you.
‘Kylo Ren worships you, you know,’ she snapped. ‘He’s trying to follow in your footsteps. Does that make you proud?’
She’d said it to hurt, but she was unprepared for the way Vader’s face twisted into a snarl. ‘My grandson knows nothing about me! He had everything I wanted! A loving family, a place he belongs, freedom and he threw it away! He thinks I was some sort of visionary but I was nothing but a slave! I shouted at him for days and he couldn't see me, couldn't hear me. I was useless!' Vader's presence had warped as he raved. She could feel the taint of the dark side on him. Vader felt like Kylo had, but much stronger and much, much deeper. Rey's instincts were screaming that he was a threat. She had brought her staff up in a defensive stance without even realising it. It wouldn’t make a difference if he could attack using the Force, but it made her feel better.
Vader seemed to notice her reaction for the first time and the dark feeling cut off abruptly. He backed away until he was against her opposite wall. His expression was twisted with disgust now, and Rey was pretty sure it wasn’t aimed at her.
‘Sorry, I didn’t mean… I’m sorry,’ said Vader quietly.
‘You will be if you try anything,’ Rey said, keeping her staff between them. She’d drawn on the Force without realising it. The power filled her, but she didn’t have the control to direct it. She wondered if the Force could be used to exorcise Force-ghosts.
‘This is why I don’t want you to fall. The dark side…’ He paused, shook his head and folded his arms. ‘It gets to you, gets inside your head and your body and it wants you.’ He glanced at Rey. ‘I’m not doing a great job of explaining, am I?’
It was Ani’s rueful tone. Rey tightened her grip on her staff. ‘Not really.’
‘You’ve touched it,’ he said. It wasn’t a question.
Rey thought back to her battle with Kylo. That moment when she’d drawn on the Force and hammered at his defences until they’d broken. How she could have killed him if the Starkiller hadn’t been breaking apart. How she’d wanted to. ‘Maybe.’
‘It makes you feel powerful and it makes things so easy. I told you that it brought me nothing but pain and that’s… that’s not quite true. The only good moments, the best moments, were when I used that power and just let go. To be surrounded by the fear of your enemies, knowing they can’t even touch you. It felt like freedom.’
That resonated in a very uncomfortable way. ‘That doesn’t change what you did.’
‘I know,’ Vader said quietly. ‘I tried to stop Ben. To explain it to him. He couldn’t hear me. Neither could my children, Luke, Leia. You’re the first person I’ve been able to talk to and I don't want to see you go dark. That's why I don't want to try teaching you anything. In case it's tainted,’ he said with a disgusted twist to his lips.
Rey nodded warily. 'I wouldn't accept training from you. Not now. And not after you lied to me.'
'Good, I guess. But... Do you want to start over? Would you let me start over?' he asked, echoing their first meeting. He even gave a tentative smile, although it was strained around the edges. It still looked a lot more like Ani's smile than an expression Vader would wear.
Rey wavered. In the ways that counted, he wasn't a threat. He couldn't touch her, couldn't hurt her. The only real danger was false information and now she knew to be wary. But more than that, Rey wanted her friend back. She wanted someone to discuss the desert with and maybe tell her about the old days of the Jedi. There was a lot she didn't know.
'Alright. We can start over,' she said.
His relief was palpable. 'Hi, I'm Anakin Skywalker.'
'I'm Rey, and you better not lie to me again.'
Anakin nodded amicably. He didn't bother trying to make any promises, which was good. She relaxed slightly and put her staff to one side before sitting cross-legged on the bed. 'Why me?' Rey asked. 'Why can I see you when your own children can't?'
Anakin grimaced. 'I don't know for sure. I was never that good at "listening to the Force", but I think it might have something to do with that.' He gestured at the lightsaber on her belt.
Rey's hand went toward the weapon, her hand hovering just above the hilt. 'It was yours, wasn't it?'
'Yes. I used it as Anakin and I used it as Vader.' His expression clouded over as he said that, but the feel of him in the Force didn't go dark again. 'I think it's because it's a link to both sides of me. Ben has something that belonged to Vader, but only to Vader. Even with that helmet near him, I still can't reach him.'
It didn't make much sense to Rey, but then again, most of this Force stuff didn't. It was telling that Anakin was willing to be so open about things now. 'Would someone else be able to hear you if they were near me and the lightsaber?' Rey asked.
Anakin shook his head. 'I don't think it works that way. It chose you.' He hesitated for a moment, dropping his gaze. 'And this is probably the worst time to ask for a favour, but I was wondering if you'd pass a message for me to Leia. She and I never really... anyway, I'd appreciate it a lot.'
'You want me to give her a message from Vader?' Rey asked, giving Anakin a long look. She liked Leia and she was almost sure that getting some message from Anakin, no matter how well-intentioned, would hurt her.
'No! No definitely not that. Kriff, don't even give her one from Anakin.'
'You really aren't the best at thinking things through,' said Rey.
Anakin grinned at her. 'That's what I told you.' Rey found herself smiling back. Anakin scratched the back of his head. 'You don't have any ideas do you?' he asked.
Rey nodded slowly. 'I could say it was a message from the Force, that’s how it works, right? What did you want to say?'
///
This time Rey went to find Leia. She had a particular room in the base, separate from her sleeping quarters. Rey had only been there once during the beginning, but there were plenty of people around to point her in the right direction.
When she arrived, the door was open, which was probably a good sign. Rey peeked around the threshold and saw Leia at a desk surrounded by datachips, holos and maybe five datapads. Rey had no idea why anyone would need that many or if they even all belonged to Leia. 'Hi,' said Rey.
Leia looked up, not at all startled by Rey's presence. She gave a tired smile and beckoned Rey in. 'Was there something you wanted to talk about?' she asked.
'Yes. I wanted to pass on a message to you,' said Rey.
'Oh?' Leia asked, raising an eyebrow.
'I can't really tell you who it's from. Um, maybe the Force, I guess?'
Leia nodded, looking a little pensive. 'Go on.'
'It goes "Padmé Amidala would be so proud of you". I don't know who that is, but I've been told it's important.'
Leia had covered her mouth with one hand.
'Are you okay?' Rey asked.
'I. Yes,' Leia managed to say. 'Thank you for that.'