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“I decided I'm not going back,” Molly said to Sherlock the day before her leave was up. They had been sitting at the table after breakfast, both of them nursing a cup of coffee. She was looking at her cup now. “I still can't pick up a knife, and I completely dread picking up a scalpel.”
Sherlock was about to take a sip, and he lowered his cup. “What are you going to do?” he asked slowly.
“I talked to some old professors I had in university. There's a position open at one of the local universities for someone to teach forensic pathology. Three of my professors mentioned me to the department head and she really wants me for the position, more than anyone else who has applied. Apparently I've made a name for myself in the field. I'll have to pick up a scalpel eventually, but not until the middle of the semester when the students do hands on work. And it's only for one class. The rest of the time it's teaching out of textbooks.”
“When would you start?” he asked.
“Not until they have their summer session. But I have quite a bit in savings and investments, so it's not like I need to worry about money. It's what I get for living frugally.” She looked at him. “You know what they say. If you can't do, teach. Or something like that.”
“So you have...” Sherlock thought for a moment, as though he was counting in his head. “When does it start?”
“Early June,” she said.
“It's the middle of November now. You have seven months until you start. That's plenty of time to get used to the idea of picking up a scalpel again.” He gave her a smile, and she grinned back. “What are you going to do until then?”
“Well, I have the interview today, but the department head said it's more or less a formality. She just wants to go over what I would need to do, the textbooks I would use, let me see the university. I think the actual interview won't last more than ten minutes. Then it's a matter of preparing to teach.” She picked up her coffee and took a sip. “I think this is a good move.”
“I think it is, too,” he said with a nod.
Then she smiled more. “The department head is a fan of yours, according to one of my professors, Dr. Klein. When she found out I was your girlfriend I think that was what sold her on hiring me.”
He chuckled. “Good to know my reputation comes in handy sometimes.”
“Yeah. I think she wants me to convince you to guest lecture.”
He thought about it a moment. “That could be interesting,” he said. “I've never thought about teaching. I simply slogged through university to appease my family, but it never interested me. But at least now, with the personality changes, I think I could make a decent teacher.”
“Maybe, maybe not,” she said with a chuckle. “Let's start you off with guest lecturer.”
“I'll do it, if the department head asks you today. Just have her contact me with when and where.”
“I will.” She took another sip of her coffee. “I'll have to get ready for the semester eventually, figure out what I'm going to teach, but it leaves me with an awful lot of free time on my hands.”
“You could always assist me,” he said slowly. “If you think that would interest you.”
“But what about John?” she asked.
“He would still assist. He's been doing it less as of late, and when his child is born I doubt he will get to do it as often anyway. And besides, you can always use it to supplement your skill set. You're quite intelligent, and I think your observations and your training as a pathologist would be very beneficial.”
She got out of her chair and kissed his cheek. “I may just do it, Sherlock.”
“I would like that very much,” he said, turning to face her. “When is your interview?”
She glanced at her watch. “In an hour and a half.”
“Then I suggest you take a shower and get ready,” he replied. “I'll take care of the dishes.”
“You know, I really do love you,” she said with a smile, giving him a quick kiss.
“I love you too,” he said when she pulled away, and she stopped, staring at him. “Molly?”
“Did you mean to just say that?” she asked quietly.
He nodded slowly. “I realized it a few days ago,” he said. “I probably should have said it earlier, shouldn't I?”
“No, today is fine,” she said, giving him a wide smile. “It's kind of the icing on the cake for what I hope will be a very good day.” He reached over and pulled her closer, finally pulling her onto his lap. She laughed and put her arms around his neck. “Do you want a better kiss, Sherlock?”
“The thought had crossed my mind,” he murmured.
“Well, I am happy to oblige,” she said, leaning in and kissing him again. He had noticed that in the last two weeks or so that the kisses had gotten more passionate, that it was getting harder to pull away and stop, or at least it had been for him. Sharing a bed with her was becoming a sort of sweet torture these days. He just wasn't sure how to go about asking if they were ready for more. This morning was no exception, he found as he tangled his fingers in her hair to keep her close. It was a few minutes before the need to breathe tore them apart. “I really should go and get ready,” she said a bit breathlessly.
“Yes, you should,” he said with a slight nod, but he didn't let her go, and when she kissed him again it was just as passionate as the other one. This time he was the one to pull away. “If I don't let go of you you'll miss your meeting,” he replied quietly.
She moved her hands slightly to play with the collar of his shirt. “I can't miss the meeting, can I?” she said.
“No, you can't.” He let go of her but she didn't move. “Molly?”
“Do you think we're ready to move forward in our relationship?” she asked quietly, looking down at his chest. “I mean, ready to take the next step in things?”
“We might be,” he said. “Is it just as hard for you to stop as it is for me?”
“If it's really really hard then yeah,” she said. She looked up at him. “Do you want to stop?”
“No,” he said. “But now is not the time. If we are intimate I want to take my time, and this is an important meeting for you. We would have to rush, and I do not want that.”
“Maybe tonight, then?” she asked, slightly hopefully.
He nodded. “Maybe tonight.”
“I would kiss you again but then I'd never leave,” she said, letting go of him. She stood up and moved away from him. “I'm going to go take a shower now, okay?”
“All right.” She moved towards her washroom and after he heard the door shut he went to her bedroom and got his phone off the charger. Then he sat on the bed and pulled up John's contact. If he remembered correctly, today was John's day off. Provided he did not have plans, he hoped his friend could see him. He spoke the minute he heard John answer. “Are you free today?” he blurted out.
“Sherlock? Is everything all right?” John asked.
“Yes. It's not an emergency or anything, but I could use advice. About Molly.”
John was quiet for a moment. “Let me guess. You two had a talk this morning, and at some point in the very near future there are plans for the two of you to shag.”
“Yes. Tonight, most likely.”
John chuckled. “I have to do to an appointment this morning, but it shouldn't take long. We can meet at Speedy's at noon, go sit in the back and have this conversation in relative privacy.”
“Thank you,” Sherlock replied gratefully.
“Just answer one question first.”
“Yes?”
“You're not really a virgin, are you? I mean, Mycroft wasn't telling the truth during the whole Irene thing, right?”
Sherlock scowled, even though his friend couldn't see. “Yes, I am a virgin.”
“Oh dear God,” John said, shocked. “Forget Speedy's. As soon as I'm done with this appointment I'm coming over to Molly's place.”
“No,” he said, panicking slightly. “She might be home by then.”
“Let's meet at your home, then. She still won't go there, right?”
“Yes.”
“Okay then. Go pay a visit to Mrs. Hudson and I'll come over as soon as I'm done. I still have a key, not that I really need one. We can sit and have this conversation in private there.”
“Fine,” he said. “I will see you there when you're finished.”
“See you then.”
Sherlock hung up first and he got dressed quickly before Molly came back into the room. If he saw her in nothing but a towel he honestly didn't know if he would be able to do anything more than stare and stammer. He hated being at a loss for words. As much as he was not knowledgeable in this particular area he would simply make a fool of himself. He wrote a quick note for Molly and left it on the pillow, then went to the sitting room to grab his coat. By the time the washroom door opened again he was shutting the door to her flat behind him.
He got into a cab and went home. He had been there a few times without Molly, usually to get more clothing or other necessities, and to visit Mrs. Hudson, who he missed greatly. While he liked Molly's flat it was not his home. No, scratch that, not their home. Because really, she called it home as much as he did. He let himself in and went to Mrs. Hudson's part of the house. He could hear her humming in the kitchen and he knocked on her door. “Yes?” she asked warily.
“It's me, Mrs. Hudson,” he said.
“Sherlock!” she said, and then she opened the door, smile on her face. “What a pleasant surprise! Come in.”
“Thank you,” he said with a smile. She gave him a hug and he hugged her back.
She pulled away and gestured to her table, where he saw a pot of tea and a cup. He sat down on the other side of the cup, and she went back to her tea service and got another cup, bringing it over and placing it in front of him. Then she sat down and poured them both tea before getting a good look at him. She frowned slightly. “Is something wrong? Is Molly all right?”
“No, nothing is wrong. Molly is just fine, other than the fact she's giving up her career as a pathologist.”
Mrs. Hudson's eyes widened. “Really?”
“She has no desire to pick up a scalpel.” He picked up his cup. “She's not ready, and her superiors won't give her any more time off.”
“Heartless bastards, the lot of them,” she replied, making a face. “Why are you here, then? Picking up more clothing?”
“Most likely. But there is a matter I need to discuss with John in private, of a personal nature.” He took a sip of his tea.
“You and Molly are taking your relationship further,” she said matter-of-factly.
Sherlock nearly spit out his tea. “What?”
“Oh, dear,” Mrs. Hudson said with a slight frown. “Was I off the mark?”
Sherlock composed himself. “No, actually, you are quite on the mark,” he said. “I was going to ask John for advice.”
Mrs. Hudson looked at him shrewdly before picking up her cup. “If I make a guess at something, would it be too awkward?”
She had known him nearly all his life, having been a friend of his mother's. He was fairly sure she knew what John had only just learned this morning. He just didn't know if he wanted to hear her say it, though. “Probably,” he said after a moment.
“Then I'll keep it to myself and offer you advice from a woman's point of view instead.” She took a sip of her tea. “Trust me, she will appreciate it.”
“All right,” he said. He just hoped this conversation didn't go awkwardly.
“As this will be your first time together, let her take the lead,” she said. “She will know what she wants, probably better than you will know what she wants. Be considerate of her, and make sure she is happy. And if it doesn't go perfectly this time, remember there will probably be more times afterward.”
“Probably?” he asked, arching an eyebrow slightly.
“If you treat it in a way that doesn't make her happy you may end up sleeping on the sofa for a long time,” she said, fixing him with an intent look.
He slumped down slightly. “Wonderful,” he murmured.
“That observation I was going to make earlier,” Mrs. Hudson said. “I'm going to make it anyway. Are you a virgin, dear?”
“Yes,” he said with a sigh. He could feel himself turn slightly red and he cursed himself for that.
She paused. “Does she know?”
“No, she does not,” he said, shaking his head. “It's not something I really feel comfortable talking about. I can talk about it in clinical terms, but when it comes to my own level of experience...” He trailed off.
“Yes, I can tell. Your ears are a bit red right now.” She gave him a sympathetic smile. “I don't think I've ever seen you blush before, and I've known you since you were a baby.”
“Well, this is going down as one of the most awkward conversations I've ever had,” he said quietly, turning redder. He really hated how his body was betraying him.
“Then we'll talk about something else, dear,” she said, reaching over and patting his hand. “Have you had any new cases lately?”
He nodded and started to go into the latest case in detail. From there the conversation continued to mostly banal things, but now he was anxious. If those closest to him knew he was a virgin, like Mrs. Hudson and his brother, surely Molly had to have guessed. They had talked about past relationships, and while he had had a few dates when he was younger he had only been serious about one female, and the woman had ended it before they got to that point. He had been hurt badly enough by the experience to swear off relationships, at least until he had met Molly. And the plain fact of it was Molly was more experienced than he was. He didn't feel as though he would measure up to any of her past experiences.
The conversation continued for nearly two hours when John joined them. He sat down and had some tea with the two of them, continuing the easy conversation that avoided the reason he was really there, and after about a half hour Mrs. Hudson shooed them out of her kitchen so she could get some baking done. The two men went up to the sitting room and sat down in their chairs. Sherlock looked at John, who still looked vaguely surprised. “So. You're really a virgin,” he said slowly.
“Mrs. Hudson guessed that fact nearly right off,” he said sourly.
“Have you told Molly?” John asked
“No, I haven't.” Sherlock leaned back in his seat, tilting his head back until he was looking at the ceiling. “What am I going to do, John? I don't want to make a fool of myself.”
“The first thing you're going to do is you're going to tell her. Before it gets to any point at which shagging might occur, preferably. Molly is a good woman. She'll be understanding and patient.”
“I know about the mechanics of sex,” he said. “I have had that talk. But I'm in my mid-thirties and I haven't actually experienced it. And then there's the fact that my girlfriend is more experienced than me. Vastly more.”
John cringed. “Don't say it that way. Vastly implies she's had a lot of partners. Do you know how many she's actually had?”
“No, I don't,” he said, lifting his head up. “The closest we have come to having that conversation was this morning, and it didn't come up. I know she's had seven boyfriends, though.” He paused. “I don't think she considers Moriarty a boyfriend, but if she did that would be eight. Are three dates enough to consider someone a boyfriend?”
“Not usually,” John said slowly. “It's enough dates for sex, though.” He was quiet for a moment. “I think, for your own personal sanity, one of the questions you might want to ask is if they were intimate. Because if you don't, it's just going to gnaw at you.”
“I hadn't even considered it,” he said quietly.
“Would you think any less of her if she did?” John asked.
“No,” Sherlock said without hesitation, shaking his head. “He was using her to get to me. I could see him taking advantage of her in that way. I would focus on that aspect more than anything else.”
“That's good, then,” he replied with a nod. “What advice did Mrs. Hudson give?”
“What makes you think she gave advice?”
“Because she likes you and she likes Molly,” he said with a grin. “So, what advice did she give?”
“Let her take the lead, be considerate and make her happy. She also tossed out the bit of if it doesn't go perfectly this time there will be other times.”
“And it probably won't. My first time was absolute rubbish,” John replied. “But then again, the girl I was with was a virgin as well. It may be to your benefit that Molly is more experienced. She can tell you what she likes and guide you better than another virgin could.”
“That news is disheartening,” Sherlock said with a sigh. “I want it to go well.”
“Well, like I said, Molly is patient and understanding. As long as she knows the truth before anything happens I don't think she'll hold a rubbish first time against you. Or a rubbish second or third time, either. You'll pick it up eventually.” He looked over at Sherlock. “Letting her take the lead is a very good piece of advice, though. Probably the best piece of advice anyone could give.”
“Is there any more I could get?” Sherlock asked.
“It's different with every woman,” John said. “Some women I've been with like one thing and other women hate that same thing. The nice part about learning with the same woman is that you learn what they like and you can perfect doing it. The first time I was with my wife was absolute garbage, and yet she still married me.” He gave Sherlock a reassuring grin. “So there's hope for you.”
Sherlock relaxed slightly. “So let her know ahead of time, let her take the lead, be considerate and make sure she's happy?”
“That about sums it up,” John said with a nod. “Once you get more comfortable then I can go into more detail about things, if Molly doesn't do it first.” He thought for a moment. “Is she on birth control?”
“I think so,” Sherlock said. “But I don't know for sure.”
“Then take precautions just in case she isn't. Do you actually know how to use a condom?”
“Yes,” he said. “That was included in the talk I had on the subject.”
John looked at him. “Who gave you that talk, out of curiosity?”
“My father. It was almost as awkward as the conversation I had with Mrs. Hudson.”
“I can imagine,” he replied with a slight smile. “You probably didn't think much about sex when you were younger.”
“When I was in university I did. It seemed to be the thing everyone was doing. So I played the part. Attempted to date, but the one girl I would actually consider my girlfriend broke things off before it got to that point. I decided then that it was all too much of a bother so I didn't pursue anyone else.”
“You kind of skipped a few things with Molly, though. You two were living together and sleeping in the same bed from the first day she moved in here, and you were doing that for a while before you actually started dating,” John said. “That's not exactly typical in a relationship.”
“Yes, I know,” he said sourly.
“That wasn't what I meant. You two are comfortable with each other. Probably more comfortable than most couples are at this stage. That can only work to your advantage.”
“Really?” Sherlock asked, surprised.
John nodded. “First times are all about expectations. Unless you're both extremely passionate and extremely knowledgeable, most first times fall short of expectations. It's the second and third and fourth times when you start to learn about each other. The fact that you two are comfortable will help. Your expectations will probably be higher than hers are once you tell her the truth, but if you lower your own to something you can live with if it's rubbish then you'll be better off.”
“I suppose,” he said quietly. “Thank you for this chat, John.”
“Hey, both of you are my friends,” John said with a grin. “I just want to make sure that it goes as well as it can.” He looked around. “Do you still have tea here, or did you take it all to Molly's?”
“There's still tea here,” Sherlock said, standing up. “I'll go make us some.”
“You do that and we can chat about other things for a while.” He checked his watch. “I can spare another hour before I need to go home. It'll help take your mind off of things, at any rate.”
“I hope,” Sherlock said as he began to make tea. They chatted for an hour and then John left to go home to his wife. Sherlock went into his room and got more clothing, since he still didn't know how long he was going to be at Molly's, and then he said good-bye to Mrs. Hudson and took a cab back to Molly's place. He got there and found she was in the kitchen making something to eat. “How did the interview go?” he asked when she turned to look at him, depositing his clothing on one of the chairs.
She smiled widely. “Starting next summer I will be a college professor,” she said excitedly. She pointed to the table, where he saw a stack of textbooks. “I need to read all of those before I start teaching. I don't have to use all the books, but I need to decide which ones I want to use and in order to make an informed choice I have to know what's in them.”
“A very good idea,” he said with a nod.
“I see you went back home,” she said, nodding towards the clothes.
“Yes. I paid Mrs. Hudson a visit, as did John, and we all talked for a while.” He came into the kitchen. “If you feel up to it, I would like to talk to you about some things.”
“Sure, Sherlock,” she said with a smile. “What is it you want to talk about?”
“Us,” he said.
She frowned slightly. “It's not a bad conversation, is it?”
“No, not at all,” he said, leaning against a counter. “There is something you need to know, and some questions I would like to ask.”
“About sex?” she asked gently. He nodded. “If you're about to tell me you're a virgin I already knew.”
His jaw hung open slightly. “How?” he asked.
She chuckled slightly. “The first time we kissed, at the start, you really weren't sure what you were doing. And I know you only had one other relationship and it didn't last very long. I just kind of assumed you had no experience.” She looked at him. “It's all right, Sherlock. Honest.”
“That makes things easier,” he said.
“What were the questions you wanted to ask?” she said, coming over to him.
“How many men have you been intimate with?” he asked.
“Five. Two of my boyfriends, one man twice and two one-night stands.” She stood in front of him. “You want to know if Moriarty was one of them, don't you?”
“Yes,” he said quietly, looking down.
“He wasn't.” Sherlock looked up. “I may have had one and two night stands before him, but there was always something about him that made me not quite trust him. I pushed it out of my mind well enough the first two dates, and when I tried to use him to make you jealous, but by the third date, when he made his move, I couldn't do it. I just didn't trust him enough.” She reached up to touch his face. “Would you have thought differently of me if the answer had been yes?”
“No,” he said, shaking his head. “I would have thought he had used you.”
“He tried to sleep with me. Tried everything he could that third date. And it just made me more sure I didn't want to sleep with him.” She smiled at him. “He didn't even get to second base.” He must have looked confused because she chuckled again. “All he got were some kisses, that's all.”
“Good,” he said.
“Oh, Sherlock,” she said, putting her arms around his neck. “Do you still want to take things further with me? We don't have to if you're not comfortable. I can wait until you are.”
“I just don't want you to be disappointed,” he said, placing his hands on her waist.
“If it's not the greatest we'll just try again and again until you get it right. Maybe not all during the same day, but we'll keep trying.” She gave him a smile before standing on her tiptoes and moving closer. “And I can be a very good teacher,” she said seductively.
“I hope so,” he said, grinning at her. “I get the feeling I will need one.”
She leaned in more and kissed him softly, and he pulled her closer against him as she deepened the kiss. They kissed until they needed to catch their breath, and then she moved her hands down and grabbed the lapels of his coat. “Come on. Let's start with the first lesson,” she said, tugging at him slightly.
“And what would that be?” he asked as she lowered her hands and grasped one of his in hers.
“How to properly undress a woman,” she said, pulling him towards her room. He found himself more eager for this than he had thought possible, considering the conversations he had had today. Hopefully things would go well tonight, and as Molly had said, if it didn't there was always the next time. At least he had that to look forward to.