Work Text:
Yoongi is not exactly the outdoors type.
Given the choice, he much prefers to be in the dark or in the studio, mixing the track for his next mix tape, than outside attempting to commune with nature. He leaves that to Jimin, who has all too often woken him up at some ungodly hour of the morning after his morning jog, slipping back into bed and sliding cold fingers under Yoongi’s undershirt.
It really is Jimin’s fault that he is out here in the first place, snow rising nearly above his ankle boots and borrowed hacksaw in hand as he stands in front of a few a sparsely populated area of pine trees.
Yoongi has no idea how one goes about cutting down a tree.
...
Jimin decides, rather on his own, that they are going to do their first christmas together right. Yoongi stares at him rather blankly when Jimin announces that they are doing christmas right this year, with an actual tree and everything. Some kind of bizarre sharing an apartment christening, and Yoongi hopes his blank stare speaks for his thoughts on the idea as he slams down the rest of his mid afternoon coffee.
“You said it was fine last night,” Jimin shrugs, snatching away the remains of his final papers littering their tiny table before Yoongi has a chance to dump the rest of the coffee pot on them out of spite. “And it has to be a real tree, none of those fake things you get from the department store.”
Yoongi blinks again slowly, and thinks he might remember saying yes to something regarding trees, but Yoongi thinks would probably give the affirmative to just about anything Jimin babbles about when he’s looking up at him with those dark eyes, Yoongi’s name on his lips. Jimin has gained fame among their group for being one of Yoongi’s few weaknesses, and Yoongi cannot believe he let some kid ruin every ounce of street cred he ever had like this.
Yoongi has a whole list running in his head about why they can’t have a real tree when Jimin just grins at him, eyebrow raised as he grabs for Yoongi’s collar across the table, whispering Yoongi, you promised in his ear. Yoongi’s resolve fizzles away as teeth tug on the piercing in his cartilage, and he begins to think this boy has doomed him.
They gain a new rule about asking for things of any sort of importance during sex, and Yoongi nearly smashes through the table when he gets a text back from Namjoon regarding his question where the hell do you get actual christmas trees.
you are so whipped.
...
“Fuck it,” He grumbles, after a solid ten minutes of trying to essentially hit the tree with the saw. He will spend the extra twenty bucks at the department store for the realest looking fake tree he can find, and if Jimin has a problem with it then he can find the better one. He’s confident enough in his counter-seduction ability to think that Jimin won’t mind so much in the end game anyway.
He buys the most garish tree he can find, because if he has to look at it for a half a month and as long as Jimin plans on throwing a christmas fit then he is going to have some kind of fun with this.
There’s one promising to be twice his height with rainbow lights built into it that seems stunningly appropriate and vomit inducing enough that he simply must have it. It is is thrown into the cart next to the ramyun that he plans to survive off for the next two weeks due to the hit Jimin’s Big Gay Tree (he names it lovingly as he’s hauling the box out to his truck and throwing it in the trunk) is going to deliver to his wallet.
“Good news and bad news,” Yoongi shouts to the general space once he gets back to their apartment, noticing Jimin in some sort of fetal position on the ground and continuing mostly unconcerned. He’s still willfully ignoring that grades are beginning to be posted, he’s graduating next semester and that’s all he care about, it’s not his fault that Jimin has nearly three years left. “Bad news, the tree is as fake as your ex’s tits. Good news, it’s really big and gay and yours. I even bought a star, so I’m pretty sure that makes me the best boyfriend ever.”
“There are so many things wrong with everything you just said,” Jimin grumbles, pulling himself off the floor to watch Yoongi wrestle the whole garish object out and into a position resembling an actual tree. Yoongi plugs it in and Jimin has to blink against the rainbow shine suddenly illuminating their living room. Yoongi is smiling so brightly that it makes Jimin a bit nervous, and he’s beginning to rethink this good idea some, having mostly been motivated to drive Yoongi up the wall while trying to get in the holiday spirit.
“It’s your Big Gay Tree, I christened it and now you just have to do the baptism thing and put on the star,” Yoongi grins, shoving the boxed star into Jimin’s arms and staring up at the monstrosity with some strange sense of pride. The tree nearly brushes their ceiling, and Yoongi is incredibly curious as to how Jimin is going to even get the thing up on top. “It’s not christmas time unless something goes horribly wrong, and I’m relying on you to provide it this year since Taehyung and Hoseok probably aren’t allowed to host dinner anymore after the ham fiasco.”
Jimin takes a moment to stare at the tree in concentration, and Yoongi begins to consider wandering out to the kitchen to make some of his ramyun while Jimin no doubt plots how to destroy their apartment in the name of christmas spirit. He doesn’t really care, he said goodbye to his security deposit the moment that Jimin moved in with him.
“Bend down,” Jimin eventually decides on, grabbing Yoongi’s arm in a vice grip and pushing him in front of the tree. Yoongi squawks in a way that is very much uncool, but lets Jimin manhandle him into the position he wants with limited mutterings of what the fuck are you doing, you’re supposed to break the Big Gay Tree not my back. “Hold onto my legs and walk me over, we’re going to baptize the tree.”
“Can’t you use a ladder like a normal person?” Yoongi grumbles, begrudgingly grabbing hold of Jimin’s calves as he all but bowls him over, all of this suddenly seeming like an incredibly bad idea. He totters for a moment after getting up, but straightens as they approach the suddenly much more threatening tree. “Be honest, you just want my head between your thighs.”
“We don’t even have a ladder,” Jimin laughs in what Yoongi describes as his annoyingly optimistic voice, pulling on Yoongi’s hair like it will somehow steer him in more of the correct direction. “Don’t be mad because you’re out of shape, maybe if you used your legs to go somewhere not the fridge or the studio then you’d be able to actually pick me up.”
Yoongi has an incredibly scathing and witty remark on the tip of his tongue, but it is interrupted by Jimin’s whoop of success as he gets the star wedged onto the single fake branch sticking up in the air. It is soon followed by a lot of colorful cursing as the swing of his arms throws Yoongi’s center of balance, the two of them tumbling to the ground in a decidedly ungraceful pile of limbs.
There’s something oddly hilarious about this, Yoongi thinks, letting the carpet that his face is being pressed into by Jimin’s arm muffle his laughter. Jimin’s hand tightens in his hair and Yoongi can feel his laughter as well, warm breath puffing over his ear.
“We are never celebrating this holiday again,” Yoongi gasps after the remains of his laughter have faded, rolling over onto his back as Jimin situates himself on Yoongi’s stomach. “Clearly it’s all part of your plan to get me killed by nature or your fatass so you can steal all my money.”
Jimin is grinning as Yoongi looks up at him, and Yoongi thinks there really is something to these lights, the apples of Jimin’s cheeks lit up in the colors, absentmindedly reaching up to brush the bangs away from Jimin’s forehead. He’s not about to admit to the tree causing any kind of good, though, and instead settles for the distraction of pulling Jimin down by way of tugging at his hair, nearly cracking their foreheads together in the process.
“Merry Christmas,” Jimin mumbles before Yoongi presses their lips together, sweet and lazy under the lights of what is going to be proof of their first christmas, and Yoongi can’t help but laugh into Jimin’s mouth, thinking that Namjoon might be right, he really is whipped.
But he doesn’t really care, because Namjoon probably isn’t about to have mind blowing sex under the gayest christmas tree a poor college student can buy.
“Merry Christmas, Jimin.”