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The first time Ranpo mentioned it, Poe brushed it off.
They’d been sitting on the couch together watching the news, which Ranpo usually found interesting, much to Poe’s surprise, when suddenly the younger man blurted out, “There’s marriage equality in America, right?”
Poe had been caught off guard for a second. There was no talk of equality on the news at the moment, so he wasn’t exactly sure where that thought had come from.
“Yes,” he responded hesitantly. “Why do you ask?”
Ranpo ignored him. “Why didn’t you ever get married?”
Poe narrowed his eyes in bewilderment, as if doing so would help him see through to Ranpo’s point. It didn’t. “Are you asking me seriously?”
“Yes! Does it matter?”
Poe raised his eyebrows. “I had no one to marry.”
Sometimes Poe was astounded by how little Ranpo understood about love. At times, it seemed that the detective assumed people just picked each other off of the street and it was a done deal. It made it difficult for Poe to tell whether or not Ranpo was joking sometimes, but he had to admit it was endearing on some level to observe his responses to different situations in their relationship. It was like watching an elementary schooler with their first crush.
He distinctly remembered that Ranpo had been the one to initiate their first kiss. It hadn’t taken him long to realize that Poe was too shy, and he was an impatient person, so he had decided himself unwilling to wait for Poe’s shell to crack open. But after he had done it, Poe had been left there, slightly dazed, and all Ranpo had to say was, “Huh, that felt kind of gross.”
So, given the history of Ranpo being the first to act, it was no surprise that the first mention of the ‘m’ word had come from him. Poe was prone to overreacting to things as major as this, so he decided instead to shut it out of his mind and forget it before he could allow himself to overthink it. He assumed that would be the end of it.
He was wrong. A few weeks went by and he had pretty much succeeded in forgetting about the entire thing, but Ranpo reminded him, as if on cue.
The latter was hanging off of Poe while he washed the dishes (not his favorite chore by any means, but the apartment dishwasher was unsatisfactory and he was unwilling to eat off of dishes that had even a speck of old food left on them), making it rather difficult for Poe to get anything done. Every time he moved, he had to make sure he wasn’t going to accidentally elbow Ranpo, and he was beginning to feel claustrophobic, but he didn’t have the heart to comment on it.
“It’s so boring watching you do the dishes,” Ranpo complained, placing his hands on Poe’s shoulders to hoist himself up high enough to look.
“Then why are you watching me?”
“Because I love you and you make it just bearable enough for me to watch without losing my mind.”
Poe scoffed. “Alright. If you really don’t want to be bor-”
“I don’t know what you want to put me up to, but no,” Ranpo interrupted, shooting him down immediately.
Poe stopped scrubbing the plate in his hand and turned around to look at Ranpo for a second before resuming.
“You know, when we get married I’m still never going to wash dishes,” Ranpo continued once he realized Poe had nothing to say.
Poe nearly dropped the plate into the sink. There was an intense emotion rising in his chest - something between fear, hope, and adoration. His thoughts lurched to the short conversation a few weeks back. He was unsure, but he decided to play along this time to see if the discussion went anywhere.
“I don’t mind,” he said mildly. “Perhaps we’ll find somewhere to live with a good dishwasher so neither of us has to do much of anything.”
Ranpo hummed in agreement and planted a soft kiss on Poe’s neck, then rested his head on the taller man’s shoulder with effort. “After this, can we order takeout?”
Poe really did drop the plate this time. “You just told me you wanted us to eat something homemade for once. That’s why I’ve been washing dishes for half an hour!”
“I know, but you’ve already washed way more than we need!” Ranpo huffed. “I’m tired of waiting around. I just want to go lay on the couch and feel uncomfortable while you stare at me instead of actually watching TV.”
Poe sat down the sponge resignedly and dried off his hands. “Fine.”
“Don’t get prissy. How could you not know that I know about that?”
And that was the end of the discussion for the second time.
The third time, however, was a bit different. It was the same in the respect that Ranpo was the one to bring it up, but this time, beating around the bush had been entirely forgotten.
They were in the grocery store. Ranpo was pushing the cart while Poe grabbed items and checked them off of the list. Ranpo tended to get a little rambunctious when given the opportunity to be king of the cart. There had been a single incident where he had pretended he was going to run over a stranger’s isolated child with the cart, which resulted in the child screaming for her life, and Poe had made sure not to show himself in that grocery store ever since. In addition, Ranpo liked to speed up and run away with the cart occasionally when he saw Poe move to put something into it. It was frustrating sometimes, but it was one of the only things Ranpo ever volunteered to help out with, so Poe decided to take what he could get.
Poe was reading the list and mentally charting their course across the store when Ranpo stopped pushing the cart and interrupted his thought process.
“How come you don’t want to marry me?” he asked solemnly.
Poe blinked a few times and looked up, his heart suddenly pounding in his chest. “What?”
“Never mind,” Ranpo muttered, beginning to push the cart again.
“No, I’m sorry. You took me by surprise,” Poe explained hastily, following after him. “Why do you think I don’t want to marry you?”
“I keep bringing it up but you don’t even seem interested.” Poe couldn’t remember a time he had heard Ranpo sound this genuinely disappointed.
He really didn’t want to talk about this in such a public area, but he didn’t want to let it be either, especially since Ranpo appeared to be sensitive about it. He couldn’t help feeling that he’d messed up by trying not to take the subject seriously the last couple of times it had been touched upon.
“I-I’m not uninterested,” he sputtered sheepishly. “I didn’t think you meant the things you were saying and I didn’t want to make a huge deal out of it.”
“I wasn’t kidding!” Ranpo told him, his exasperation poorly concealed. “I was testing the waters to see what you’d do, which was nothing at all. I thought we could be like Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson, but if that doesn’t appeal to you, then fine.”
Ranpo was obviously baiting him. Poe decided to try and beat Ranpo at his own game.
“I don’t want to be like Holmes and Watson,” he replied, watching Ranpo tense up as he spoke. “They weren’t married.”
Ranpo's relieved sigh was visible. “Whatever! They were partners. And we’d have to go to America, too.”
“Those books are set in England-”
“Blah, blah, blah!” Ranpo waved his hand dismissively. “Who cares? It's just a book. Will you marry me or not?”
Poe didn’t even have to think twice about it, but he held his answer for dramatic effect, and partially due to the fact that he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to speak without making a fool of himself.
“... It's actually a series of books, and a lot of people ca-”
“Edgar!”
“Yes. I will.”
Sometimes, he didn’t understand his luck, and now was one of those times. He felt that the honor of being within Ranpo’s presence was above him. How could such a brilliant man choose to spend so much time with him? It was an enigmatic puzzle that Poe tried to solve on the daily. Perhaps he needed to stop trying so hard. It didn’t matter why, or how; he and Ranpo were partners, and that was more than enough for him.
“I get to be Holmes,” Ranpo stated. “No offense, but I don’t think you’re smart enough.”
“Hmm. I think you’re right. After all, I did just agree to marry you.”
“Hey!” Ranpo whirled around to give him a sour look.
Poe smiled lightly. “I’m teasing.”
In fact, he thought to himself, I think I’ve just made the most intelligent decision of my life.