Work Text:
During the days that were so bright
It felt amazing just being alive
When the days turned dark
I had no idea what was being done
The emotions turned cold
The heart turned black
And all I could feel
Was the hate all around
Trying to imagine what life was like
When I was not cursed
With an eternity of pain
And hate
People saying “Not even god loves you…”
Now is something that I’m starting to believe is true
My heart aches
About why it happened
And why they did it
When I had nothing to do with it
And was punished for something that I did not commit
Trying to forget
Is not something I’ll ever be capable of
When the feeling
Is more than just hate between them
And me
They showed nothing but hate
They never loved me for who I was
Only to be used for their pleasure
Of becoming someone they are not
I will never forgive
Because of what they have done
The pain inside of me
Will ache forever
During the past
I thought they were the ones that truly did love me
But I was wrong…
Oh so very wrong…
When now I know the truth of what they have done
But the question is…
Why did they?
I’ve always wanted to be normal
But the truth is
They are the ones that took away that potential
When laying in the bed
Wondering what I have done
To deserve such disgrace
And such hate
Thoughts ranging in my head
And painful flashbacks from my childhood
I could not get over
The people I grew up with
Never loved me from the beginning
I’ve always wondered to myself
Why I’m the one left out
When they are on vacation
Or at the park
Or at dinner with one another
And leaving me
With the corridors
Of darkness of the night
Trying to figure out
Why you’ve done such a thing
By killing me slowly
And painfully
When you knew all along
That it was slowly hurting me to the point of death
Why should I allow myself anymore to you
When I know you’ll just try to hurt my soul
Like you did with my heart
I’m still piecing it slowly
But it won’t ever be the same
As I know the truth about this family
Why have you condone me to be like this?
When I’ve never hurt you
Or have ever tried to hurt you
Yet you’ve done the worse
And tried to slowly and painfully over the years
To kill me with a poisonous food
I will never forgive what you have done
And what you have shown
The deceit you’ve shown and the hate you’ve provide
When you’ve known from the start
That I was slowly but surely dying
As I sit here thinking
What condone you to do such a thing?
When I was so young
However now I know
What monster you were and what you have done
Why were you trying to turn me into one?
When I did not belong
There is no mutual feeling between us
You’ve done your part
Now I’ve got to leave and do mine for the world
All I’ve really wanted in life
Was for a true family of love and care
But now I know the truth about family
And it hurts like hell
You’ve poisoned my body with an eternity of pain
When you’re pain doubles
You will never know the truth about pain
Because you did this yourself
All I ask is why you did so?
This human being I did not want to be
Is a curse like no other being
All I’ve wanted is to be happy and free
But now I know the horrible truth about me
You’ve turned me into a zombie
Of what I was originally
I will never be free from this
Because I’ll always be reminded
Of what you did to me…