Chapter Text
He didn’t know why he was thinking of her. It wasn’t on purpose. It wasn’t even a full-fledged thought at first.
It was just an image: sweat rolling down the back of her knees, her skin shining in the sun.
Everything went quiet. He closed his eyes to see it better, those beads of sweat running down her calf.
He tried to remember the color of her skin, the way that piece of hair was always falling over her face, no matter how many times she tried to fix it.
Eventually he could see it, her eyes closed while she laid in the grass, resting for just a few minutes, trying to forget everything else, this island, all the death, them. Him.
She opened her eyes and caught him staring.
“You a stalker back home, Doc,” she said in that voice that always made his spine tingle. And then she smiled. Maybe not at him.
***
It wasn’t dark yet.
Everyone got tense and jittery as soon as the sun set.
Each night could be your last, or at least the last of the little bit of sanity you’d been able to hold on to.
But these moments just before dusk were different.
They were just down the stream from everyone else. She wanted some privacy, and he just wanted to be near her.
She peeled off her clothes slowly. It wasn’t meant to be sexy, every inch of their bodies were covered in sweat. But still, he felt himself harden immediately with every new inch of skin she uncovered.
She pulled her panties down her legs and he averted his eyes just enough to stem an unwanted wave of guilt.
She looked over her shoulder at him, that cocky grin on her lips, and then walked carefully into the water.
He wanted her to invite him in. She didn’t. And he was too damn… well she would call it repressed, to ask or just go in after her.
So he sat on the bank and watched her wade in the water.
She looked happy, free. He tried to burn the sight into his memory.
At the moment, remembering her seemed like the most imporant thing he could ever do.
***
She didn’t sleep.
Maybe three or so hours a night. He tried to tell her that she was going to burn out. That she wouldn’t be any good to anyone if she didn’t let herself rest.
“And who do you think is going to protect you while I’m sleeping? Bernard,” she’d yelled at him.
“What,” Bernard yelled from across the camp where he was putting out their fire.
“Nothing,” she said, over her shoulder. “Let’s get moving.”
She stayed just ahead of the entire group today. Just out of his reach.
Every time he got close, she yelled to Eko that she was going to scout ahead. “Alone,” she whispered in a hard tone just loud enough for him to hear.
When they finally camped for the night, he claimed the space next to her as usual, damn what she thought.
“You can’t take a hint, Doc?”
He took a deep breath to steel his temper. “I can take a hint about as well as you take advice.”
Her mouth set in that hard line that was a clear warning sign if he’d ever seen one. “Sleep somewhere else tonight.”
“Why don’t you just sleep tonight and I-”
“This isn’t a game Doc.”
“I know that. Do you?”
“What’s going on,” Bernard said, his voice shaky.
“Stay out of this,” she said.
“What’s going on is Ana Lucia is going to keel over from exhaustion if she doesn’t get some sleep soon.”
“Mind your own business.”
“I’m a doctor and you are my business,” he said, realizing how weak it sounded as soon as the words were out of his mouth.
“I don’t need your speeches.”
“No, but you do need my help.”
She laughed, but it was dry and humorless. “What the hell do I need your help for?”
“I can either be here to help you when you fall over, so tired you can’t sleep, your body so sore you can’t move and your brain so burnt out you can’t think straight. Or you can take a damn nap for a few hours.”
“And what are you gonna do?”
“Give me the gun Ana Lucia.”
She laughed again, the sounds so full of bitterness and pain it broke his heart. “You must think I’m crazy.”
No, I don’t think you’re crazy,” he said seriously. “But if you don’t sleep soon, you will be.”
***
When she woke up she refused to look him in the eyes.
But he was okay with that. He could tell that the short nap, which turned into eight hours, had done a world of good. So he didn’t press her.
“Can I walk by you today,” he said sheepishly, shaking his head at the desperation clear in his voice.
She smiled and laughed, this time full of actual humor and maybe even just a little bit of happiness. She looked up at him, her eyes squinting at the sun, “Sure you can Doc. I don’t have any treats for you though.”
He smiled. “Fine, make fun of me, whatever. As long as you’re ok, I’m ok.”
***
He was dying.
He could feel it.
This was his time.
Vincent’s heavy breaths were a rhythmic lulling and Jack let his body relax.
He wouldn’t fight what was coming.
He couldn’t.
He didn’t want to.
When he closed his eyes, he saw her.