Work Text:
one beat
two beats
one second
two seconds
Killua glided his fingers softly through his wrist, lingering one second too long on the calloused sun-kissed skin. He held his breath, afraid of facing reality, a vision he never wanted to imagine. After a gust of wind gently brushed the tears pooling in the corner of his eyes, did he let out his first sigh of relief. It was sound, loud, still ringing in his ears. The steady pulse thrumming beneath the skin, signaling life.
He was breathing.
Letting out what he recognized as a sob, he tried to move as quiet as possible gingerly shifting his body so he could take off his sweater and cover him from the intruding sun. The loud beat was still ringing in his ears as he was holding onto him. Like his pulse was his anchor, the light at the end of the tunnel. The leaves were rustling as the spring air danced a familiar waltz with the oak trees, whispering sweet nothings; a sharp contrast to what he was feeling. His lips were quivering, trying so hard to not make a sound. However his mouth let out an involuntary sigh, sounding imploring asking silently for him to be okay. For them to be okay.
He was desperate.
His mind couldn’t stop buzzing, his eyes running erratically as anxiety was pulling at his heartstrings, the moment reliving in his mind. A sharp pain shooting to his rib-cage, his own heartbeat started picking up pace. His breathing hitched, coming into short stops and suddenly he felt suffocated. Like he was drowning. The air was escaping his lungs, spring breeze no longer brushing his skin but prickling at him, a numbing ringing in his ears tossing him over the edge. His eyes started to see white. The thousands of emotions rampaging after reliving the moment he saw him lose it, go raw, rendering him motionless.
Killua tried to take deep breaths to calm himself down, but it was useless, the regret slashing through him already.
Why didn’t I stop him
Why didn’t I say anything
Why—
The sound of grass stirring broke him out of the trance, regret still grasping his heart. Yet, shakily, he reached out to place his fingertips on top of his heart— touch feather-like, eyes trembling. The steady pace calming him down slowly. He synced his own breathing to the other’s, right hand coming up and down with the movement of the chest like a buoy swaying calmly after a storm, pressing lightly. His own heart felt like exploding.
After a few wind whispers, his eyelashes finally met the dust on his cheeks and the tears flowed slowly.
Breathe in, breathe out
His own racing heart finally matched the steady, soothing lull of Gon’s heartbeat. The heartbeat welcoming him like beacon of light, of hope. A sound so familiar, it felt like home.
He was home.