Chapter Text
Merde, Laf. I'm not going on some holy, life-changing trepidation."
Alexander mumbled beneath his breath. His lanky counterpart yanked the Raven-colored hair that was pulled back nicely in a pony-tail. Alexander flinched, he couldn't help it, it was instinct.
"And what are you going to do? Oh, oh- excusez-moi, I know. Peel that book off of your face, right?"
Lafayette toyed sarcastically, then breaking off into a trail of muttering in French.
"It must be melded to your face by now, I'm assuming."
The Frenchman continued as he fussed with a lump of camping-gear on the ground. Alexander rolled his eyes, letting the silence express his frustration. He had just moved to America only two months ago to escape his hellish life in Nevis. Lafayette had taken him under his wing, following their extravaganza at a bar when he slung his arm over Alexander's shoulder in attempt to stick-it to the conservatives.
Of all people he had to dote over, it had to be me, didn't it?
Alexander thought to himself as he fondly watched Lafayette try to untangle backpack straps. Of course, the impromptu-relationship was disclosed promptly after Lafayette found that Alexander wasn't amused. The only reason the small man held his tongue was for the soul purpose of pissing off the rowdy men who emerged from a car branded with a conservative-flag license plate. Their relationship evolved, however, to a silent companionship. Alexander would return to the bar the following night, a casual and defensive look plastered to his eyes. He could not help but feel the smallest seedling of hope when he noticed the Frenchman's springy hair, and heard his barging laugh. Pretending not to notice, Alexander grabbed a drink, his gaze building a barrier of don't-touch-me-or-I'll-rip-that-cotton-ball-of-a-pony-tail-off. Despite his instinctive wall, he was desperate for companionship, solid companionship- unlike the ones he made in Nevis. His defensiveness was his body's way of adapting to the social climate he had weathered in Nevis, but he was lucky that Lafayette bound into his life like a wildfire. He burned down the unforgiving undergrowth and dark scathes of thick vines that tormented the islander's soul, replacing it with nothing but a new expanse for life to grow. And with Lafayette's patience and understanding, fragile lichens and shy green sprouts began to take root in the reborn soil that was Alexander's heart. No Matter how much the man denied it, Lafayette was like a brother to him, and the only one he trusted. Lafayette understood Alex's troubled past, although it took bouts of frustration and patience in order for Alexander to let down his wall. Now, Alexander was faced with Lafayette's pleads to literally march into the heart of nowhere and dangle from the side of a rockslide. The thought alone set Alex on edge, and he tapped his foot worriedly. He came to New York to be safe, and although it was just a measly hiking-trip, Alexander didn't want to risk departing from the endless trance of the city.
"Isn't it, like, six hours away, anyhow?"
Alexander questioned quietly, rubbing the back of his neck. Lafayette subconsciously responded with a hmm? as he rammed a flickering flashlight against his hand. After a moment's delay, Lafayette registered Alexander's tentative words.
"Are you thinking of joining me, petit Alexander?"
Alexander's edge softened in the slightest as he heard Lafayette's fond nickname he had bestowed upon him. Lafayette knew Alexander had buried himself in the hum of the city, and recognized it was a lot to ask of him to drive with him all the way up north. Alex hesitated.
"/No/, it's just... That's far. You, being gone for all that time.."
He trailed distantly. Lafayette stopped fiddling with his hiking gear for a moment, looking back at Alexander who was rubbing his arm in thought.
Oh, non.
Laf thought to himself, guilt pulling at him. He thought that leaving the city would give Alexander a chance to /wake up/, to stop the cycle he had placed himself in the moment he moved to the city. It didn't take long for Lafayette to figure out that his /petit frére/ had settled himself into the murmurs of car horns and the abyss of noise that the city produced, all to forget whatever past that haunted him so. Alexander was a tough little thing, defensive and confident when he needed to be. But Lafayette noticed that the confidence was in his ability to persist and survive, not necessarily in himself. Which is why, Lafayette guessed, that Alex was so attached to him. Lafayette was part of the routine, part of the city, part of the familiarity that Alexander depended on in his move. But perhaps he was asking for too much with this trip.
"Alexander, mon petit frére, I don't have to go. I thought that the mountains would, perhaps, be a splash of cold-water, no?"
Lafayette saw Alexander's gaze shift, like he was turning something over in his mind.
"No, no. I'm not a child, I shouldn't be ruining your fun."
"Alexander, you're not ruining-"
"Lafayette, you've done more than you know for me."
Alexander interrupted. His tone was calm, but his frustration built, upset at how dependent he was on Lafayette's guidance.
"You're sure you don't want to come? You're missing out. You remember Hercules and John, don't you?"
Lafayette asked gently. Alexander's eyes flickered to attention. They were friends of Laf's, rowdy but outgoing, loud but welcoming. They had met once before, about a month ago. And did Alexander remember John Laurens. Gentle and shy, similar to Alexander (although his confidence was growing). Alexander bit back a small smile, remembering how John had let his beer dizzy a pink flush onto his face, making his freckles stand out. His face soon went pale when he spilled it all over Alexander. After a rush of /"Oh my God, I'm so sorry's"/, and running his hands nervously through his lively curls, John did his best to clean up his drink. Alex was grateful that he was not the one rambling fits of apologies. He laughed as he reminisced upon the night he truly felt like he belonged, truly appreciated the glimmer of life within his friend's eyes. Yes, he remembered them.
"When are you leaving, again?"