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Sebastian was surprisingly calm regarding the whole situation. He wondered if he should feel more angry, bitter or disappointed. Okay, well, if he was being completely honest with himself he did feel a little bitter. Having a 20 points advantage in the championship and seeing that decrease to one is a truly unpleasant feeling. Still, he wasn’t in the foul mood that was expected of him after the race.
He was mostly tired. It was early into the night, but he had already done his PR duties, talked to his mechanics. He sighed heavily after stepping into his hotel room and closing the door behind himself. He dropped his backpack down to the carpeted floor, not really caring where it landed.
As he went to the window to pull the curtains closed and switch on the lamp beside the enormous bed, he noticed a single t-shirt hanging from his suitcase that laid wide open across the floor.
Seb eyed it for a few moments.
Then with two long steps he went over and picked it up, considering it quietly.
It was one of Mark’s huge t-shirts that Sebastian stole from him during their time together at the Australian’s home, just a couple of weeks ago.
Looking at the piece of clothing he took a deep breath.
He wasn’t feeling bad about today. Nor he needed comfort. And he definitely wasn’t missing Mark or wishing the other man was with him right now. Anyway.
Seb gripped the shirt tightly before throwing it onto the bed covers, deciding on having a shower first, then going to bed early. He was knackered.
*
After going through the motions of cleaning himself, Sebastian stood in front of his bed again in his underpants, with towel still in his hand, looking at the shirt suspiciously like in any moment it might do a back flip.
With a heavy sigh, he discarded the towel into the nearest armchair, then he gingerly picked up the black t-shirt and with a swift movement he pulled it over his head.
The effect was immediate - as he got wrapped up in Mark’s smell, the warmth of the cloth and the safety of being swallowed by it, he felt himself letting go of the tension that until that point he didn’t even realise had been inhabiting his body.
He let out a contented hum then went to slip under the covers. It wasn’t that much later that he felt his eyes turn heavy and he drifted into sleep.
*
Sebastian was woken by somebody caressing his cheeks gently. He blinked drowsily a few times, trying to shake the sleepy fog that still clouded his senses.
When he could finally make his brain work, he was greeted by the sight of Mark crouching in front of his nightstand, only clad in his boxers, looking at him with a soft smile on his face.
‘There you are’ whispered the Australian while continuing the feather soft brushes alongside his cheekbone.
‘What are you doing here?’ Seb’s voice was barely a mumble, as he was trying to catch a glimpse of the clock that rested behind Mark’s shoulders on the table. It was nearly midnight.
Mark let out a little laugh.
‘Where else do you think I would be, Seb?’ he paused for a moment before sighing regretfully ‘I’m sorry that I couldn’t catch you after the race. Work stuff and all that, you can imagine it was fucking crazy around the paddock. Also, I’m sorry how it ended for you, genuinely. I don’t think anybody saw that happening.’
Seb groaned and clenched his eyes shut tightly before opening them again.
‘Please don’t start, not you. They already said everything, starting with “disaster” and ending it with “losing the championship”. It wasn’t that. I already said it a hundred times, over and over again. It’s not like from now on every time I’m out there my tires will get a puncture. It’s not like the car was awful. It happens, it was unfortunate, and that’s it. I’m tired of everybody coming after me. I don’t need pity’ he looked Mark straight in the eyes. He didn’t need consolation, he was dealing with it just fine. It was fine.
Mark wasn’t backing down though. If anything, he spoke just as firmly as Sebastian.
‘I know very well you don’t need pity, and this is not that, believe me. It was only an unfortunate race for you, okay, I get that. And even though yes, you had them in the past as well, I know you, Seb, and you can charm everyone with your nice words but you can’t fool me. You are tough, I know that. For the team, for the fans, for yourself, even. But you don’t have to be. Not with me. Never with me.’ He whispered the last part, looking into the other man’s bright eyes which looked so vulnerable in the dim light of the hotel room. ’It’s okay, it’s alright. You can let go’
Seb closed his eyes again, and took a deep breath ‘I just wish nobody made a big deal out of it. It feels like they are rubbing it in. It’s like, when you aren’t winning they take every opportunity to drag you down and I can’t stand it. I didn’t lose the championship.’
Mark got up from the floor and ushered him to the other side of the bed so he can sit in the spot the German had been occupying. Then he motioned him closer again, and sighed as Seb curled up at his side, hiding his face in Mark’s neck.
‘You didn’t. You won’t’ he said firmly, kissing the curls on Sebastian’s head.
‘You can’t possibly know that’
‘That’s true but I know you, remember?’ smiled Mark, earning a faint chuckle from the smaller man plastered at his side.
Neither of them said anything for a little while, enjoying the peace and quiet after the hectic day.
Mark spoke first, breaking the comfortable silence.
‘By the way, don’t think I didn’t notice the choice of your clothing’ he felt Seb going rigid under his hand that had been softly caressing the German’s backside all this time. ‘I don’t mind, sweetheart. It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes. You are barely at my house, and yet still managed to lift one without my notice. You are getting really sneaky. Maybe I should consider putting a lock on my wardrobe.’
Seb mumbled something against his neck.
‘Sorry, I didn’t quite catch that’
Sebastian lifted his head and with a pout he spoke again ‘I said it wasn’t one. It was several. But they are mine now. You will never see them again’
‘Oh, I have no doubts I will.’ he said, picking at the material that stretched over the other man's chest. ‘It looks good on you’
Sebastian blushed at this, ducking his head again into Mark’s neck, but he couldn’t quite stop the remark ‘I bet it does’ as he tried to hide his smirk as well.
Mark gasped in feigned shock at this, as he started to tickle him. ‘You, you never change, do you?’
Sebastian squealed and tried to fight back while laughing ‘Stop it, Mark! I swear I will give them back, just stop!’
They ended up tangled in each other, both of them out of breath and giggling. After a few moments, Sebastian raised his arm and grasped at the back of Mark’s head as he looked up at him with a quickly fading smile.
‘I love you’ he said seriously, fingers dancing on the skin of Mark’s neck, while his eyes remained on the other man’s face, searching.
Mark smiled, then lowered his head to press a soft kiss to his lips. He drew back, looking at the man beneath him, eyes shining, lips parted on panting breaths. He went back to kiss him a little more firmly this time. Sebastian gasped, as he opened his mouth a bit wider. After a while, Mark pulled back just a fraction, so when he spoke his lips still brushed gently against the other man’s.
‘I love you, too. So fucking much’ he bumped his nose against Seb's, pressing a final kiss to those lips.
He then turned on his back, pulling Sebastian with him, hugging him close to his chest. Seb went willingly, pulling the blankets over them as he snuggled a little further down into the bed. As he started to drift off, he thought to himself one last time: maybe if every Sunday was like this, he would care a little less about the results. Maybe. A little bit. As long as he got this.