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Chapter Text

It was Jeff and Nick’s idea to throw a bachelor party for Blaine. It would most likely be their only chance to have one with just the Warblers. Even though they had helped with the proposal, Kurt really didn’t like them very much.

Beat’s family had a beach house in Cabo and an upcoming five-day weekend provided a perfect opportunity for them to get away. Amazingly, all of their parents had no problem with their sons going off to party in a foreign country where the legal drinking age is 18. The plan was to fly down on Wednesday, hang out on the beach on Thursday, have the actual party on Friday, recover Saturday before flying back home on Sunday and going back to school Monday. It was a good plan…in theory.

Saturday morning Blaine woke up with the worst hangover of his life. He was pretty sure it was from all the tequila shots he downed at his party, he only wished he could remember. All he wanted to do was lay in bed until the pounding in his head stopped. The problem was he really needed to pee.

When he rolled over to go to the bathroom he winced from a pain that could only mean one thing. He reached over and yes, there was another body in his bed. Despite all the pain, he sat up and opened his eyes to find out who he was.

Of course, it was Sebastian.

Damn it!

“Uuuuuugggg, Sebastian, wake up” Blaine groaned while shaking the boy next to him.

“No. Stop shaking. Too early. Head hurts” Sebastian groaned back and then the reality of the situation hit him. Needless to say, he was quite surprised “Killer, what the hell are you doing in my bed?”

“Evidently waking up from a night of drunken debauchery that led to me cheating on Kurt! Again!”

“Not so loud” Sebastian whined “And you don’t know that.”

“Um…the pain in my ass, the hickeys all over your neck and the three open condom wrappers on the nightstand next to you are pretty good hints.”

“Three times, huh?”

Blaine smacked him across the chest eliciting another groan “Shut up. What happened last night?”

Sebastian forced his body to sit up and looked over at Blaine “I have no idea. Trust me, if I remembered having sex with you three times in one night I would be high fiving myself right now.”

Blaine started to shake his head, but soon realized that made him nauseous “Oh god, Sebastian. What the hell am I going to do? I have to tell Kurt that I cheated on him AGAIN and this time it actually was with YOU.”

Even though Kurt was nowhere good enough for Blaine, Sebastian didn’t want Blaine to go through that again “You don’t need to tell him. No one ever needs to know besides the two of us. The other guys were in just as bad of shape as we were last night. They probably don’t remember anything either. We just need to come up with a plan to explain why you’re in my room and I have hickeys all over my neck.”

“Sebastian…”

“No, Blaine this will work as long as you don’t let the guilt eat you alive.”

Could he live with it? Technically, he didn’t know that he cheated on Kurt even though the signs pointed to it “Do you have any suggestions?”

“How about this? We tell everyone that you pulled some guy off of me and told me I was too good for randoms. The imaginary guy is responsible for the hickeys.”

“You are too good for randoms.”

“Well, you’re too good for Hummel.”

An awkward silence came down between them as there was really no coming back from those statements. Finally, Blaine spoke up “I think the story will work. I’m going to take a quick shower so I can wake up and not smell like sex. Do you have something I could put on for now?”

“Yeah, I’ve got some shorts and a t-shirt you may not drown in. Go start your shower. I’ll close my eyes.” Once Sebastian heard the door shut, he got out of bed to grab some fresh underwear and something to put on for himself as well as Blaine. When he closed the drawer, for the first time he noticed a ring made of seashells was on his finger. “Why the hell would I buy this?” he asked out loud “Oh yeah, drunken blackout.” He started to take it off but was distracted by a piece of paper on the dresser. Panic overwhelmed him as he picked it up. He may not read Spanish, but he immediately knew what the piece of paper was.

“Blaine! Get in here! Now!”

“What?” Blaine came running out of the bathroom. He could hear the panic in Sebastian’s voice. He could also see that Sebastian was still naked.

“Um, are you by chance wearing a seashell ring?” Sebastian asked, trying not to notice that Blaine was dripping wet and only wearing a towel.

“Yeah” Blaine was confused at why his ring would be such a big deal “I just figured one of the guys bought it for me as a gag gift.”

“It’s not a gag” Sebastian said as he held up his left hand to show his matching ring and his right hand to show the piece of paper “Because I’m pretty sure this is our marriage license.”

“Ohmygod, Ohmygod, Ohmygod” Blaine repeated over and over again as he began to pace “Sebastian, are you sure?”

“I’m pretty sure. The address to where this supposedly happened is on the license. Go back to your room and get dressed. Give me 15 minutes and I’ll meet you out front. We have enough problems right now without the guys seeing my neck. Hopefully they’re all still passed out or are on the beach. Leave them a note saying we went out and will be back soon.”

“And what reason should I give them for us leaving?”

“I don’t know. Oh, tell them we went to discuss what happened with the Slushie. None of them would want anything to do with that.”

“Sebastian…”

“Blaine, stop. I’m just as freaked out as you are. While you’re there worrying about Hummel, I have my own problems. All I can think about right now is how pissed my father is going to be, not that I got married but that I got married without a prenup!”

“Slushie talk. Got it! See you in 15 minutes.” As Blaine snuck back to his room he berated himself for being so selfish. He hadn’t even taken a moment to consider how this affected Sebastian. Yes, he had just fucked up his life, literally, but it didn’t mean that Sebastian needed to be drug down with him.

Both of them were able to get out of the house without seeing anyone. It was a short walk into town and about a half hour later they found the address on the license. It definitely was not what they expected.

“This can’t be right. This looks like a voodoo shop” Blaine whispered.

“Santería” a beautiful young woman corrected him as she walked into the shop from a back room “I expected to see you both again, but I did not believe it would be this soon.”

“You know us?” Sebastian asked.

“Of course, you are Señor Blaine and Señor Sebastian Anderson-Smythe. I am Rosa. I was a witness at your wedding last night. You don’t remember?”

Sebastian’s signature smirk appeared for the first time since all of this began “Anderson-Smythe?”

“A before S” Blaine murmured and then tried to determine if that was a statement or a memory. He quickly covered up by asking “Um…Rosa, you said you were a witness at our wedding?”

“Si, my mother and I were your witnesses and my father was your officiant.”

Blaine stumbled back and sat in a chair. Despite everything he knew, that last statement of Rosa’s made it all real. He and Sebastian were married. Sebastian wasn’t much better, but when he looked over at Blaine he knew he would need to be the one to ask the questions for a while “Is your father around? See, Blaine and I were a little drunk last night and might not have been in the best state of mind to consent to marriage.”

Rosa began to giggle “No Señor Sebastian, you were not a little drunk. You were what you Americans call shit-faced.”

“Then how could your father have married us?”

“Your true love story.”

“Our what?!” The boys spat out in unison.

“Your true love story” Rosa repeated, giggling again like it was the most obvious thing in the world “Many people come in here, insisting to be married while under the influence of the tequila. When that happens, we have them tell their true love story to my Abuela. If she says that their story is indeed one of true love then my father will marry the couple.”

As if on cue, a woman (who Blaine and Sebastian silently agreed had to be at least 100 years old) in a traditional Mexican dress shuffled into the room with the assistance of a walking stick. When she saw the two of them she gave a toothless grin and motioned for Sebastian to sit next to Blaine. It took her a while, but eventually she stood in front of them, patted their faces and called them mis hermosos niños. The woman who they assumed was Rosa’s Abuela sat in a chair and motioned for Rosa to join her. The entire scene was a bit surreal to Blaine and Sebastian, but the women across from them smiled at what they saw. It was clear to them that neither boy realized that they had been holding hands since the moment Sebastian sat down.

Blaine regained his ability to speak so he asked “How would she know our…true love story…was true?” The true love story part had been extremely difficult to say. Yes, there had always been something between himself and Sebastian, but true love? He loved Kurt. At least he thought he did.

“Abuela is blessed with a psychic Mexican third-eye.” Rosa told him.

Blaine knew his mind was still a little fuzzy, but he was sure he had heard of that before. But where? After promising he would figure it out later, he turned to Sebastian and asked “What the hell did we tell her?”

Abuela began to speak very quickly, in Spanish of course, so neither of them understood what she was saying. After a couple of minutes, she stopped and signaled for Rosa to translate for her “She told me to remind you of your true love story. I translated it for you when you told Abuela. She is afraid that you will not be strong enough and will let others pull you apart.”

“We have to know” Sebastian said and Blaine nodded his agreement. They were ready to hear it. How bad could it be?

Abuela stared at them while Rosa began “The two of you fell in love the first moment you looked into each other’s eyes, but Señor Blaine was under the spell of the Evil Troll Gayface.”

Sebastian let out a loud laugh at the mention of the name they had given Kurt, but quickly apologized (even though he didn’t mean it) and asked Rosa to continue.

“Señor Sebastian tried to free Señor Blaine but Evil Troll Gayface had too strong of a hold. That was when Señor Sebastian made a special potion to try and break the spell. However, the potion hit Señor Blaine instead of Evil Troll Gayface. Since the special potion was only meant for evil trolls, it hurt Señor Blaine very badly due to his pure and loving heart.”

“I really am sorry about that” Sebastian mumbled.

“I know you are” Blaine answered and then gave Sebastian’s hand a quick squeeze to further his point.

“Señor Sebastian’s heart shattered when he hurt the boy he loved, which made the spell Evil Troll Gayface had on Señor Blaine stronger. He tried one more time to break the spell, but Señor Blaine no longer remembered their love and the Great Yellow-haired Trouty Mouth was able to convince him to go back to Evil Troll Gayface’s Kingdom.”

“You were obviously in charge of naming the characters in this story” Blaine whispered to which Sebastian just nodded and continued to listen.

What could he say? It was a good story.

“Then came the day before Señor Blaine would be betrothed to Evil Troll Gayface. He went to ask his friends for help and when he did, he found Señor Sebastian there as well. They found out very quickly that, even though they had been apart, their connection remained strong. So strong that the connection pulled them into a loving embrace like, um, what is…?”

“Magnets” they said in unison causing Rosa and Abuela to smile.

“Si, yes, magnets. That embrace made them realize that they still loved each other. Señor Blaine tried to break the spell, but he could not, and he and Evil Troll Gayface became engaged to be married. But the good news was that Señor Sebastian and Señor Blaine had very good friends and they saw the love the two of them shared. They were able to find just enough magic to break Evil Troll Gayface’s spell but only for a short time. They would have to fly to a special place and it would last only five days, but they knew that they had to take this chance to be with each other. When they arrived in the special place, they were so happy but also sad because they knew they would have to go back soon. That was when they found a new potion that made them unafraid of Evil Troll Gayface.”

“Tequila” they agreed. That was no doubt about that one.

“It was during that time they decided to get married, that way even though Señor Blaine would have to go be with Evil Troll Gayface, Señor Blaine and Señor Sebastian would always belong to each other.”

Neither of them knew what to say. They couldn’t deny that this was their story, well without the evil troll part (although that was only Blaine’s opinion). How could it be a story of true love?

“Rosa, Abuela, that is our story, but when we get back home I will have to go be with Kur…Evil Troll Gayface” Blaine kept looking over at Sebastian as he began to plead their case, thankful that he wasn’t making comments that could make their situation worse “Is there any way we could be granted an annulment?”

Rosa relayed the question to her grandmother, but she shook her head and answered “No, no, no”. She then pointed at her forehead and then over at Sebastian. “A marriage can be annulled if it was not consummated on the wedding night. However, Abuela says that her physic Mexican third-eye says that’s not the case with you two. Plus, the bites on Señor Sebastian’s neck show you were together.”

Panic overtook Blaine once more “We have to have an annulment! If we were to get divorced it would show up when I go get a marriage license with Ku…him. And Sebastian, your father would find out about the whole no pre-nup thing. Isn’t there another way?”

After Blaine asked that, for the first time since he had sat next to him, Sebastian let go of his hand.

Rosa translated what Blaine had said, however, Abuela did not look happy when she replied to the question.

“There is one other way for the marriage to be annulled” Rosa told them “When you return to your home, you cannot see or communicate with each other for one year. You cannot even ask friends about each other. You have to cut each other out of your lives completely. Then on one year and one day from the day you part, you come back here and if you still want it, you will be granted the annulment.”

“How will you know…?” Sebastian began to ask, but Abuela pointed at her forehead making the rest of the question unnecessary. So instead he turned to Blaine and asked “What do you think?”

“I’m pretty sure I can hold off the actual wedding planning for a year. And, New York is a big place so it’s very unlikely that we would run into each other. This shouldn’t be too hard.”

“It will be easier than you think since I’m not going to school in New York.”

“What do you mean?” Blaine was in shock. No, he was downright flabbergasted. Whenever they discussed college, Sabastian always said he was going to New York. “You were accepted to Columbia.”

“I was also accepted at Harvard. I’m going to Boston.”

“When did you decide this?”

“A couple of weeks ago.”

Blaine didn’t have a response for that.

Chapter Text

11 Months Later

“Kurt, I’m not going to ask Sam’s friend to put you and Rachel on the VIP list. This is Blam Saturday. Just because for once we are going somewhere the two of you want to go doesn’t mean our plans change. I’m hanging up on you so I can finish getting ready. Goodnight Kurt, and I’ll see you at brunch tomorrow. Yes, I love you too.”

Well, he thinks he does.

Blaine was beyond frustrated with his fiancée at the moment. Actually, he had to admit that he had been beyond frustrated with Kurt on a pretty regular basis these days. He usually just gave in to avoid the drama, but tonight that wasn’t going to happen.
On the 2nd Saturday of the month, Blaine and Sam go out by themselves on a bro date. Kurt, Rachel and Mercedes (when she is in town) do the same only they call it a Diva Date. Every other Saturday of the month they all go out together, which is fine, but he always looks forward to his date with Sam.

This schedule had worked well for 10 months, but tonight one of Sam’s modeling friends was going to be the DJ at a hot new gay bar in the Village. He managed to get the two of them in, even though they were both underage. The moment on Wednesday that Kurt heard about this was the moment he started nagging Blaine to get him and Rachel in as well.

This was one of those times that he was glad he had moved with Sam into Mercedes’s guest room.

As frustrated as he was, he decided to let it go and went back to getting ready. He had just pulled up his pants when Santana let herself into his bedroom “Care to explain to me why I just got a text from your fiancée telling me to talk to you since you are being unreasonable? Oh, by the way, you and Trouty are doing a good job getting rid of your Cronut Boy body.”

“Thanks? And Kurt is whining because I won’t ask Eric to get him and Rachel into the club. He knows Sam wouldn’t do it so he probably texted you because he knows Eric got you and Dani in as well. I'm sure he wants you to convince me to be (air quotes) reasonable and get him and Rachel into the club.” Blaine stopped when he saw that Santana was distracted “What’s going on?”

“I’ve never seen your chain before. I mean I’ve seen the chain before but not the ring on the end of it. Is it made of seashells?”

Shit!

“Yes, it’s seashells. I picked it up when I was in Mexico. What are you doing?”

By this time, Santana was directly in front of Blaine with his ring, still at the end of the chain, in the palm of her hand. He was about to ask her what she was doing when she let out a gasp and backed away “You married Sebastian while you were in Mexico!” she hissed as not to be heard by the others “Didn’t you?”

Shit!

“How…? I mean how…?”

She pointed to her forehead and said “I keep telling you people that I am blessed with a psychic Mexican third-eye.”

Blaine slapped his hand over his mouth and sat back on his bed. He knew he had heard that before!

He hadn’t told anyone, not even Sam, what happened in Mexico but Santana had guessed. Or psychically saw with her third-eye or whatever. Any way it happened, it wasn’t good.

Santana went out to Sam and Dani and told them that Klaine had yet another fight and that they should go ahead to the club while she talked with Blaine. Sam tried to protest, but she convinced him to go make sure that they could get in because Blaine was going to need lots and lots of alcohol. She also promised that they would be no more than 30 minutes behind them.

She walked back to bedroom and found a virtually catatonic Blaine “Start talking Anderson.”

And he did. 11 months of hiding what happened with Sebastian came spilling out of his mouth, well everything he remembered. When he finished, there was only one thing she could say…

“Holy Fuck!”

“Yeah, it’s pretty bad.”

“That’s the biggest understatement of all time. What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to go to Mexico next month and get my annulment. What else am I supposed to do?”

“Blaine…”

“No, Santana. I appreciate your concern but there’s nothing else for me to do. It’s what Sebastian wanted or otherwise he wouldn’t have gone off to Boston. Now, can we get to the club so I can drink and dance my problems away?”

Santana knew there was much more there, but for tonight she wouldn’t push “Fine, the first round or tequila shots are on me.”

“Not funny.”

Twenty minutes later when they were coming up from the subway, Santana received a call that caused her to groan. Loudly “It’s Dani. Evidently Hummel and Berry are at the club.”

“What? How?” Blaine stopped at the top of the stairs and rubbed his temples as he felt a headache coming on.

“From what Dani understands they were back at the loft pouting because you’re a big meany and decided to make themselves feel better by trolling some of the Broadway blogs. Guess they found one devoted to the revival of Funny Girl, and with Rachel being cast as the Schnoz, let’s just say the Broadway gays have voted her their queen. And when she just happened to mention that she and her friend had wanted to come to the club tonight, but couldn’t get in…”

“They got them in.”

“Yes, but only on the condition that she sings at least one song while she’s there.” Blaine gave her his best eye roll/are you shitting me look combination, but he knew she wasn’t. Santana felt even more sorry for him if that was possible “What do you want to do? I could tell Sam that you went home.”

“No, nuh uh, not happening. This is Blam Saturday. I’m going to go and have the best time of my life while at the same time keeping guys away from Sam and his perfect-for-a-blow job lips.” He took her arm in his and started walking again “Let’s go.”

“Good! My third-eye is telling me that it’s going to be an interesting night.”

By the time they got there, Rachel was up on a swing singing Pumping Blood while Kurt was standing on a table next to her with his tie around his head, pretending that he could dance. Blaine was absolutely mortified, so he decided to find the bar before finding Sam. Fortunately, he was able to do both at the same time since Sam just so happened to be at the bar when he got there.

“Dude, are you ok? I can’t believe Kurt had the nerve to come here on Blam Saturday.”

“Really Sam? He whined for four days about coming tonight. I believe it. But you know what, I’ve decided that I don’t give a fuck. You and I are going to have a drink, then are going to go over there by Eric and have a gay old time!”

Sam started to laugh “Gay old time! That’s a good one!” Then instantaneously, Sam’s demeanor changed “Blaine…”

“Blaine!” came a high-pitched screech from behind him. The second he heard it, Blaine got the bartender’s attention and ordered three shots of tequila. Yes, he knew what he ordered.

“Did you see me and Rachel up there?” Kurt asked the moment he reached him.

“No Kurt, I didn’t see you because you’re not here. Not even you would be selfish enough to barge your way into Blam Saturday when I on more than one occasion asked you not to.” Before Kurt could respond, the bartender came back with Blaine’s order. He slid one over to Sam and then heard Kurt let out a huff of disgust.

“Blaine, you know I don’t drink tequila.”

Blaine took a glass, clinked it with Sam’s and then threw it back. Then he picked up the other one and turned to Kurt “Who said it was for you?” before he drank that one as well.

“Blaine, you know you’re a light wei…What the hell is that Meerkat doing here?”

Blaine froze because there was only one person on the planet Kurt called Meerkat. Sebastian. Sebastian was here? Why the hell was he here and not in Boston? And why now? They only had one more month until they could go back to Mexico to get their annulment.

He thought back, back to the rules Rosa and Abuela told them. The rules were they could not see or communicate with each other, but they didn’t say anything about staring at Sebastian across a crowded nightclub. Blaine turned to face the same direction as Kurt, and there he was. Sebastian, just as beautiful as he remembered. He was smiling, laughing, leaning over to talk to some guy. Putting his hand on the guy’s arm. Some random guy. Random…

“Oh, hell to the no!”

Both Sam and Kurt watched as Blaine took off toward Sebastian, but before they could follow Santana, Dani and Rachel walked up. They had all seen what went down, but only one of them was aware of what was truly happening.

She couldn’t have been happier.

“Please tell me that’s Sebastian Smythe” Santana already knew it was, she just wanted to see what Kurt would do.

“Yes, that is the fucking Meerkat and for some reason MY fiancée took off to talk to him. Come on Rachel!” Once Kurt and Rachel walked off, Santana nodded their direction giving Sam the clue to follow. Then she pulled out her phone and handed it to Dani “When we catch up with them start recording and don’t stop, no matter what anyone says.”

Since he got a jump on the others, Blaine reached his destination first. Needless to say, Sebastian and the person he was with were surprised to see him.

“Blaine?!”

A beyond shocked Sebastian practically jumped out of his seat when he realized that it was actually him. Unfortunately for Sebastian’s friend, who had stood up as well, he was met with an uppercut to the jaw knocking him back down to the couch he had been sitting on.

“Stay away from my husband!” Blaine yelled at the guy before turning around to face Sebastian “I told you that you were too good for randoms!”

“And I told you that you were too good for Evil Troll Gayface!” Sebastian countered “That’s not some hook-up Blaine, that’s Hunter” Blaine’s confusion had him add “Hunter Clarington” to his statement.

Blaine whipped back around to verify Sebastian’s claim, and sure enough he had punched Hunter Clarington “Damn it Anderson! I told you I wasn’t even remotely bi-curious. I was not hitting on your husband.”

“Your what?!” Seemed like everyone else arrived just in time to hear Hunter’s last statement.

“What the hell is going on Blaine?” Kurt screamed as Sam held him back while Rachel attempted to calm him. Dani filmed the scene like her girlfriend had requested (but yeah, like she wouldn’t be doing it anyway). Meanwhile, Santana moved over to sit next to Hunter.

“How’s the jaw?” she asked.

“Hurts like hell but just needs ice.” He said as he motioned for a waiter.

“Good. So, is your idiot still in love with my idiot?”

“Never stopped. And yours?”

“Beginning to finally realize he has been for longer than he’s currently willing to admit. We need a plan to get them out of here so they can talk.”

Before Hunter could answer, Kurt started to really lose it “You’re fucking delusional Smythe if you think for one second we believe you and Blaine are married. You were there for MY proposal. Blaine is MY fiancée!”

Sebastian reached down his shirt and pulled out a chain with a seashell ring on the end “Well, this ring says he’s MY husband!”

Even though he pretty much had Kurt in a tight hug, Sam was able to look over and see that Blaine was in shock, eyes fixed on Sebastian's chain and ring. Hell, he wasn’t much better since he was more than aware of what was on the end of his best friend’s chain “Blaine, are you ok?” he asked.

Blaine didn’t say a word. He just reached down his shirt and pulled out his own chain with a sea shell ring on the end.

Seeing Blaine’s ring was like a giant stop sign for everyone, even Kurt. About this time the waiter showed up with the ice for Hunter’s face, and he not only brought security but someone that appeared to be some sort of manager.

“Hunt, are you ok? What the fuck is going on?” the manager(?) asked but not before Santana noticed that he looked an awful lot like Hunter.

“I’m fine Cam. Oh, Santana Lopez, this is my brother Cameron Clarington. He’s part owner of the club. He invited me and Sebastian here for the weekend to check it out.”

"Nice to meet you Santana, but Hunter, you still haven’t answered my question. What’s going on between Sebastian, the guy that punched you and the dude who for some reason has a tie around his head?”

The presence of Hunter’s brother, along with security, gave Santana an idea “Nice to meet you too Cameron, and we’re trying to figure everything out as well. Can you do us a favor? Take the two making goo-goo eyes at each other and tie boy somewhere quiet, but separate them. That way your brother and I can talk with my other friends and make a plan.”

Sebastian and Blaine each went with their security guard quietly, but Kurt did not. Cameron finally got sick of it and told him to shut up “Listen asshole, you can either go quietly with Todd here to a back room where you can calm down, or I can kick you out. I know the only reason you got in here in the first place was that you came with Rachel Berry.” Kurt chose option A. Cameron then offered the use of his office where it would be quieter.

“I don’t understand what’s going on” Rachel said once they were there.

“Blaine and Sebastian got married during Blaine’s Warble Bachelor Party in Mexico, but Sebastian left Blaine alone with an evil troll because somebody’s grandma told them he had to” Sam told her.

“Hold up, Touty. You knew?” Santana asked.

“I share a room with Blaine” Sam laughed “He talks, a lot, when he has shall we say intense dreams and he has had many, many of those dreams lately. All about Sebastian.”

“Kurt is going to go ballistic” Rachel groaned as she fell back into a nearby chair “What are we going to do?”

Santana turned to Hunter “Give me whatever money you’ve got.”

“Why the hell would I do that?”

“Because I have a plan, but it requires cash. And since I’m a waitress and the shoes you are wearing cost more than I make in a month, you get to come up with the money.”

“Fine” Hunter said as he pulled out his wallet “I only have $1000. Is that enough?”

“Asshole”

“Bitch”

Oh, yeah. They were totally going to be besties. Santana handed some of the money to Rachel “Go get Kurt and get him drunk. Totally and completely plastered. There’s also cab money, but you can’t let him go back to the loft for at least an hour. Try for two if possible.”

“Got it!” Rachel sounded like she was an operative in a secret mission, but at least she was helping.

The four that remained discussed and then approved Santana’s plan. Sam and Dani went to take care of a few things before Kurt could get back to the loft. Santana and Hunter exchanged phone numbers and agreed to a place for Blaine and Sebastian to meet in the morning. Now they just had to get their two idiots to agree.

Blaine woke up the next morning and had to take a minute to remember where he was. He wasn’t hungover, it’s just that the night before had been an emotional rollercoaster. He was pretty sure that his engagement to Kurt was over, but the thing that surprised him was how “not sad” he was. Sure, there was a lot of drama he would still have to get through. However, this time he was sure he could let go if he had to. He actually chuckled when he thought of how the Evil Troll Gayface’s spell had been broken.

When he got up and went out into the living room, he found Santana as well as Dani. “Good morning” he told them “What’s going on?”

“Ok, so when you went all ga-ga over your hubby and your fiancée pretty much lost his mind. We thought it was best to bring you here because Evil Troll Gayface doesn’t know where Dani lives.”

Blaine ran both of his hands through his hair and groaned. Loudly “Please don’t call Kurt that.”

“So not happening. I’m retiring Lady Hummel for it. Now, last night Trouty and Dani went to the loft to rescue any shit you had there before, don’t give me that look...fine, Kurt could go all Purple Piano on it.”

“Purple Piano?” Dani asked.

“Long story” the two former New Directions members said in unison, but Blaine knew exactly what she meant.

“Thank you, I never would have thought of that. I suppose I need to go back to the brownstone and see what’s going on.” Although he really didn’t want to, but had no choice especially knowing that Mercedes was due back tomorrow which probably meant he would soon be homeless.

“Oh, no you’re not” Dani said with a big smile on her face “You and Sam are moving in here with me.”

“Excuse me?” Before either girl could answer Blaine, there was a knock at the door. It was Hunter…and Sebastian “Seriously, what’s going on Santana?”

“Dani and I plus my new bestie here are going to the brownstone. We’re going to pack both of you up and bring everything back here at least until the dust settles.”

Hunter took over from there “While we’re gone, you two are going to talk, and we mean really talk. It was obvious to all of us last night that even though you hadn’t seen each other in 11 months, there’s still something between the two of you. You guys owe yourselves this.”

“Be honest and take this seriously.” Santana added “We’ll be back in about two hours” she told them before she closed the door, 

Sebastian sat in the chair across from Blaine, but it was evident between the two that neither knew where to begin. Blaine decided to be the brave one “When did you start wearing your ring on a chain?”

“I’m not sure. Around the end of September, maybe. I had just had my first date at Harvard and it was a fucking disaster. When I got home I saw the ring in this little bowl I had on my dresser. I found the chain and put it on. Have worn it ever since.”

Blaine shook his head and tried not to smile “Was it September 30th?”

“Yeah, I think so. It was the night before the first home football game so there were signs with the date everywhere. Yes, September 30th. Why?”

“Because I put mine on the day I moved into the brownstone after Kurt and I agreed that we shouldn’t live together right away. It was September 30th.”

It was Sebastian’s turn to shake his head, but he did smile. That was too big of a coincidence to ignore “I have a question for you, Blaine. However, I’m not quite sure how to say it.”

“Just say it Sebastian. Our friends basically ordered us to clear the air.”

“When we were at the club and you pulled out your ring, you looked like you remembered something. What was it?”

Shit! Why did I tell him to just say it? “I remembered that Abuela spoke perfect English.”

“Me too! That sneaky little voodoo priestess.”

“Santería” Blaine corrected.

“I know.” The mood in the room changed as they both realized what they had inadvertently admitted.

“I remembered everything Sebastian.”

“I did too.”

Flashback: Night of Blaine’s Bachelor Party in Mexico, after all the other guys went back to the house

6 shots of tequila, angst

I’m sooooooooo sorry I broke your eye Blainey

You didn’t break my eye, Sebby. It only itches sometimes. Then I put some magic drops in it and all gone!

I didn’t break your eye?

I just said you didn’t, Sebby.

No, but I broke my heart when I hurt you.

8 shots of tequila, crying

I love you so much Blainey. I’ve loved you since I first saw you. Actually, I’ve loved you since I first saw your ass. But I love all of you now.

I love you too, Sebby, so, so much. But, I can’t leave Kurt. It’s like he has some spell on me that I can’t break.

Is it because he’s a troll? No! He’s an evil troll because he makes it so you love him even though he’s not good enough for you! Stupid Gayface!

Yeah, stupid Evil Troll Gayface!

Still 8 shots of tequila, no longer crying, Sebastian left and came back

Here, I bought you this ringy thingy from the lady selling ringy thingys outside

It’s a seashell ringy thingy. It is the most beautifulest ringy thingy eeevvveeerrr. You should have one too, then it would be like we were married. OW! We should get married. Tonight.

Yeah, let’s get married. It won’t count since we’re in Mexico. I mean it will count in Mexico. I mean if you marry Evil Troll Gayface in New York, you will be married to him there. BUT, when you come to Mexico, you won’t be married to him because you will be married to me. Because in Mexico you love me!

End of flashback

“I was kind of surprised that it was actually you that called him Evil Troll Gayface first” Sebastian said to break the silence.

“I know. Santana will be so proud.”

“Blaine, did you remember anything else?”

“Oh, yeah. Like I said, I remembered everything.”

Flashback: Back at house, after wedding and a shared bottle of champagne

I could have done it Blainey

I know Sebby, my big strong man. But if you dropped me when you tried to carry me over the threshold you could break my ass then how would we have married sex?

We’re going to have married SEX! Woo Hoo! Blainey, you have the bestest ass EVER. Have I told you that?

Yes, Mr. Sebby Anderson-Smythe, you have. A Lot, a lot, a lot.

Wait, why am I Anderson-Smythe? Shouldn’t it be Smythe-Anderson?

No Sebby, A comes before S. Remember, we told Rosa

(snickering) How about when we have married SEX, the person who COMES last is the one who’s name comes first

(breaks out sobbing) That’s not fair!

Blainey what’s wrong?

(still sobbing) I’ve only had sex with you know and he’s kinda small, and then I had sex with cheat on Kurt guy and he was done in like 10 seconds. Oh my god! Sebby, I’ve only had bad sex and you’re like the king of sex, so when I have married sex with you, I’ll be 10 seconds guy (sobs harder)

We can make it best 2 out of 3

(sobbing stopped) Ok

20 minutes later

Blainey are you a vampire?

No, your neck is yummy. I have to bite it

1 0 minutes after that

See, I told you you wouldn’t be a 10 second guy

But I came first

That’s why we have to have married SEX again. 2 out of 3, remember?

Ok, time for married sex again

Woo Hoo!

2 0 minutes after that

(singing) My universe will never be the same, I’m glad you came, I’m glad you came

Blainey, you're so funny

30 minutes after that

I thought (pant) you said that you (pant) had only had (pant) bad sex

I have

No way, because Blainey, (pant) that thingy you did with your tongue (deep breath) BEST TONGUE SEX EVER!

Sebby, just because I’d only had bad sex, doesn’t mean that I didn’t watch good porn. Now, I’m tired and my ass hurts and I’m going to sleep.

Will you still be here in the morning?

Of course, I want to wake up with my husband on our first day of married in only Mexico

And then we can have more married SEX?

And then we can have more married sex

Woo Hoo! I love you Blainey Anderson-Smythe

I love you too Sebby Anderson-Smythe

End of Flashback

“Blaine, did you remember..?”

“The tongue thingy, thing?” Sebastian nodded, but Blaine didn’t have to ask. He knew what Sebastian really wanted to know “Yes, I remembered it, because like I said I had seen it watching porn. But Sebby, I only ever did it with you.”

“Good” Sebastian said with a cross between a smile and his trademarked smirk. Yes, Blaine had to have had sex with Kurt in the last 11 months, and that killed him, but that one move of Blaine’s belonged only to him. It helped.

“And never, ever call me Sebby again.”

After they were done talking, they called their parents. Blaine’s parents were so happy that Blaine thought his engagement was over that they offered to pay Dani’s rent in full for the next six months so the guys could stay there. Sebastian’s dad was surprisingly cool about what happened, especially when Blaine said he would sign a post-nup. They all agreed that the boys should go back to what they had been doing for at least the time being. While Sebastian’s father thought Abuela’s explanations of annulments were a bunch of bullshit, he didn’t really know that much about Mexican law and would have to bring in one of the partners at his law firm. He also thought, if necessary, he could make Mexican officials see that a chance meeting in a New York City night club did not break the rule of not seeing each other for a year.

Chapter Text

5 Months Later

“Hey Seb, I’m back!” Hunter called out. He took the several bags that he had brought in and set them on the breakfast bar “I know we live in New England, and Fall is a big deal around here but did the temperature have to drop 30 degrees in the last three days? I wound up buying a new sweatshirt while on campus buying books and I’m not a sweatshirt wearing kind of guy.” Hunter realized he had basically been talking to himself for the last 5 minutes “Sebastian?”

He was about to head to his roommate’s room when Sebastian came out, and he was dragging his suitcase behind him “Where are you going?”

“California” Sebastian told him as he went to grab the charger for his phone.

“California? What the fuck, man? Classes start Monday.”

“Blaine…”

Hunter threw his hands in the air. “Of course, it’s Blaine” he sighed while overdramatically throwing himself onto the couch.

Sebastian sat down in the chair across from him. His expression was so earnest that Hunter had to bite his cheek to keep from laughing “You don’t understand Hunt, Jeff called. He saw Sam earlier today and Sam told him that Blaine transferred to a university in California. That means he left Hummel because there was no way that son-of-a-bitch was going to leave NYADA once he weaseled his way in.”

“So, three days before classes start, you believe that NOW is a good time to talk to Blaine? Not in the, I don’t know, 3 months since your annulment finalized? Or maybe, you could have answered one of his 80 phone calls?”

“67”

“67 what?”

“Blaine has only called me 67 times” Sebastian let out a groan of frustration as he slouched back into the chair “I blew it, didn’t I?”

“Spectacularly” Hunter told him, not even attempting to make him feel better. Hunter knew what was really happening with Blaine. It wasn’t like he didn’t talk to his sister from another mister (Santana) every day “Why didn’t you just talk to him, Seb? You obviously still love him.”

“Because I couldn’t have survived him telling me that he went back to Hummel again. It was easier not knowing.”

Hunter wanted desperately to reach across and shake some sense into the moron in front of him but there was a knock at the door. When he opened it, it took every fiber of his being to keep his composure “May I help you?”

“Hi, I’m your new neighbor, Blaine Anderson…”

Sebastian was up in an instant, staring at the man in his doorway. It was Blaine, but not Blaine. The hair gel was gone and a mass of curls took its place (and was that scruff?). The cardigan and bowtie were also a thing of the past, replaced by a t-shirt and leather jacket. He was still wearing the tightest pants known to mankind, but at least the bottom of this pair touched his shoes. Sebastian didn’t know what was going on with Blaine, but he absolutely approved of the changes.

He was in such a stupor, that he hadn’t noticed that Hunter had invited Blaine in “I’m Hunter and the statue over there is my roommate Sebastian. So, are you new to the area?’

“Yes, I just transferred from NYADA to Berklee.”

Ok, that woke Sebastian up “Berklee?”

“Yeah, my best friend, well more like my brother, Sam tells everyone I transferred to California. You know, Berkley?”

Hunter asked their “guest” Blaine to have a seat and the other two went back to where they were before he arrived “Why would your friend do that?” Hunter actually knew, but he wanted to keep this little game going. After all, it was his brilliant plan.

And maybe Santana helped a little bit too.

“I have just come off of not one but two failed relationships. One of them, I was engaged to the guy and it ended beyond badly. I hurt him, but he destroyed any feelings I ever had for him with how he handled it. And if I would have been honest with myself, the relationship hadn’t worked for a long time. Anyway, when I told him I had transferred schools, he went on and on with the I love you(s) and You can’t leave me(s). So, when he thought Berklee was the one in California, I didn’t correct it. Very few of my friends know the truth.”

Sebastian wanted to smack himself for being so stupid. He had been ready to fly off to California and he hadn’t even known where to look. But more than that, he had been an asshole for not contacting Blaine over a stupid fear “You said you’re coming off two failed relationships?”

“Yes, please don’t think badly of me, but I was married to one guy while I was engaged to the other. I don’t know what it was, but for a while I was obsessed with marriage. I think it was that when gay marriage became legal, I wanted to be part of it since I never thought it would happen in my lifetime.”

“What happened with your marriage?” Hunter asked knowing Sebastian wouldn’t.

“Our annulment was finalized a few months ago but that was the last I heard from him.” There was a definite sadness in Blaine’s tone. Sebastian cringed knowing he put it there.

“What if he was afraid that you stayed with the fiancée?” Hunter asked as well, this time giving Sebastian his famous You're a fucking imbecile look.

“We had this true love story that I never had with the guy I was engaged to. He should have at least given me the chance.”

That was Hunter’s sign to leave the two of them alone. Neither one of them were paying him any attention, so he just walked out of the room to go call Santana. He wanted to know why she didn’t tell him that Blaine was finally in Boston.

Blaine had applied to Berklee months before he saw Sebastian at that club. He and Kurt were fighting so much that Blaine felt he needed to have a back-up plan. His original plan was to apply to Tisch, and he did, but something propelled him apply to Berklee as well. Honestly, he hadn’t even thought about Sebastian when he applied. Now he was wondering why he had accepted.

“You know what Sebastian, I’m done” Blaine was obviously frustrated and stood to leave “You don't want to know me anymore, fine. I guess the 50 times I tried to call you and you didn’t pick up should have been my first 50 clues. It was Santana and Hunter’s idea to reintroduce myself, which obviously didn’t work either, but at least I tried. So, if you ever decide to pull your head out of your ass and talk to me, I’ll be around.” Blaine headed toward the door, when he heard from behind him…

“67”

He turned around and saw Sebastian had followed him. He was so close that Blaine could smell the intoxicating scent of his cologne, but he steadied himself enough to ask “67 what?”

“You called me 67 times not 50. You also sent 83 texts. You did try Blaine and I didn’t. I had planned on coming to New York the day after our annulment was finalized, just to see you. To give you a “hello” hug so that I could hold you in my arms, but I got scared. Scared that without the tequila and the seashell rings there was no true love story. I couldn’t watch you walk away with Hummel again.”

“Don’t you mean Evil Troll Gayface?” Blaine reached over and pulled him into a hug “Sebastian, our story may be complicated and at times ridiculous, but it’s ours. Is it a true love story? Maybe, but we won’t know unless we give it a real shot.”

Relief washed over Sebastian as his hold on Blaine got tighter and tighter “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry” he repeated until Blaine made him stop.

They stood there holding onto each other for quite a while before Blaine pulled back “So, my former-but not really-because we got an annulment-so our marriage never really existed-husband, would you like to go on a coffee date with me?”

“I would love to.” Sebastian couldn’t get the goofy grin off of his face as he remembered the very first time he had coffee with Blaine. It was right after they met. Right after he fell in love with him. Ok, right after he fell in love with Blaine’s ass.

Blaine took his hand “Good. Now if you will just take me to find a coffee shop, maybe we can get started on the next chapter of our story.”