Archive of Our Own

Her mouth was full of blood. She had spit out most of it and she would have done it again if not for the pain between her ribs and the fear that another coughing fit would only push the broken bones deeper through her lungs.

'Fucking shit.' It was all her lips could let out in one breath.

Her hand went to the ground for the medi-gel packages but everything was empty.

'What a goddamn annoying way to die.'

'At least it counts for something...'

The voice was breathy, distant and more carefree than it should have been, considering the circumstances.

Sloane stared at the woman spread meters away from her, between the debris and the burning remains of the crashed shuttle.

Her vision faded in and out of focus, at times the blurry image turning sharp; it hurt her eyes.

The Pathfinder helmet was removed; broken, but still carefully placed by the woman’s side, within reach of her fingers, as if it mattered past their deaths. Her raven hair was sticking to the sweaty skin and bruised face. She looked like shit and Sloane bet she provided no better sight.

Trying to force herself back against the stone into a sitting position, she only managed to make the pain worse. Her body slipped to the left and she felt her broken ribs crashing more into her organs. Sloane bit her tongue to suppress the scream and tried again. When she made space for a couple of breaths she sighed; or whimpered; convince herself it was a sigh. She could have lived longer and happier; maybe not happier, but at least longer than this for sure.

'Fuck you, Ryder.'

A short laughter escaped the other woman; raspy and throaty.  

'You always say that. But given our current situation, I'm afraid you've missed all your chances in this lifetime.'

If Sloane could have afforded the energy to roll her eyes she would have.

'You're so full of shit. Can’t believe you’d waste your last breath on sounding as dumb and condescending as ever.'

Those words escaped through grinning lips. All things considering, at least death wasn’t going to happen in bad company. Still, there was something in Sloane’s chest that was telling her none of this was right. It should have been. She always hoped that when death was to come, it would catch her in a good fight. That it did, but maybe she never considered it would come that soon. She should have listened to Kaetus; In spite of the fact that he appreciated the Pathfinder more than she ever did, he never approved of them working together. Always said Ryder was only trouble; that the shit she got involved in was too much to handle for people like them. What was ‘people like them’ anyway? Ryder had been chasing justice when she first came to her for help. At least that’s what Sloane thought back then. Then she found out the truth and she had to give it to the turian and his ability to read people. But still, she decided to back up Ryder and told herself it was out of revenge… It had been more than a year since then, and they only ended up with more questions than answers. She should have just stopped, for fuck’s sake; but she hadn’t. Friggin’ Ryder and her magnetic attitude. And now this…

‘It doesn’t count for shit, Ryder… We’re as good as dead and all we’ve ever accomplished was to cut head after head in this hydra of a situation. And the more heads we cut, the more appeared.’

Her sight lost focus again and she made out the shapes of snowflakes gently floating through the air, landing everywhere, around her, mixing with the blood on her clothes as she tried her best to keep pressure on the open wound.

No, that wasn’t it. There was no snow on this arid planet. It was ash; they were being covered in ash and sand.

Her jaw clenched. Something was not right... Sloane looked back up at the lying figure, and her heart started racing. She could not tell if there was movement or breathing. Not through her blurry vision.

'Eyon?'

There was no answer. Silence hit her like a krogan hammer, right in the chest.

When sheer panic gripped her, she understood what had been wrong about all of this. The thought of Ryder dead next to her freaked her out and the fact that it affected her only made the fret in her mind more unbearable and frustrating.

This is not right, the thought raced through her head a thousand times. It was not right because when the fight on the ship came to an end Sloane knew she was a goner. Ryder on the other hand could have saved herself and gotten the bloody data out, to safety, make the entire damned race worth something. Instead, she stood there, babbling nonsense about no man left behind and how they started this chase together.

‘To hell with this. SAM, give me status?’

There was silence. She narrowed her eyes, trying to read any signal coming from the pathfinder’s omni-tool.

 And then the escape shuttle came down the gravity well like a burning rock, and then the crash, and then patronizing Ryder dying right in front of her.

 She knew that if Ryder was dead, SAM would also cease existence.

‘SAM, you piece of shit, if you’re still active give me the fucking status!’ Give me something, she continued but was not ready to sound desperate. She only knew how to sound angry.

And then suddenly there was a spike of light in the omni-tool and static followed as if a com channel had been opened.

‘Overwriting voice module control.’ The robotic cadence filled the air. For a moment she forgot what the AI was talking about. Hearing the damn thing speak answered her question. ‘Vital signs are low. Increasing the speed of haematopoietic cells release to even the loss of blood and stimulating the dopamine neuronal activity to ease the pain. Ryder is currently unconscious.’

‘Then kick her back into conscience.’

‘I was already attempting to stabilize her limbic system when you interrupted, Miss Kelly.’

'Is patronizing prick a feature of yours as well or you just learnt it by spending too much time in Ryder's head?’

She didn't wait for an answer, she didn't even say it loud enough to demand a conversation although she had the feeling the AI heard her just fine.

Sloane breathed easily now, which also meant that her body was acknowledging the pain again. For a split of a moment she considered closing her eyes and resting, but unlike Ryder she didn't have an AI to take over the functions of her body. Ryder was lying on the ground with her spine fractured, and yet she had given Sloane all the medi-gel still available while she depended on SAM and whatever he was doing to keep her alive. They, she could almost hear Eyon correcting her. Another row of coughs threatened to break through. She couldn’t control it and took the pain that came with it. She felt something liquid in her lungs and was sure it wasn’t supposed to exist there.

Her eyebrows furrowed at the thought of death. But what else was there to it? They couldn't avoid it; just prolong the moment before everything would go dark. Her heart sunk; Kaetus was going to be furious.

'The stars are so pretty.'

That brought Sloane back from the emotional hole she had been digging herself into.

She looked back at the woman - no movement, except for the bright, open chart of her omni-tool. There was no doubt however, that she was back.

Without realizing it, Sloane looked up at the dark sky of the night.

‘It’s mostly smoke and ashes, you know that, right? And stupid sand.’ We’re gonna die and get buried in sand as well.

'It's not such a bad view before death. If I close my eyes right now I'll take the universe with me.' The young woman continued in the same dreamy voice.

She adjusted the leg under her, feeling the needles in her numbed nerves.

'You're high as a kite, Ryder.’

Sloane wasn’t particularity eager to know what self-induced morphine-like substances the AI had released into her body for the woman to sound so serene instead of screaming in pain.

'Somewhere among the stars...' her arm went up, flailing after the sky 'Somewhere there, is the Milky Way.'

Her hand dropped like a weight to her chest and for an instant there was silence between the two.

'I hope they made it.' Sloane thought she could hear Ryder’s voice shake. 'I hope they found a way.'

She knew what the Pathfinder was referring to. In fact, Sloane considered herself the unluckiest person in the entire galaxy for knowing. Of all the people Ryder surrounded herself with, she had decided to confess the truth behind their departure to Andromeda to her. Sloane had raged, called the Initiative, all of them, herself included, cowards for abandoning the fight in the Milky Way. But Ryder? She had stood through it all and grounded her with facts; motivated her with what they had to fight for in the future. She never faltered, nor felt nostalgic about the lives they left behind.

It was such a peculiar thing, the influence people have on each other; the melting point between two personalities, and how intimate the experience of death felt for the two of them. Sloane surprised herself when the words came out.

'They are not our people anymore.'

'No, they're not.' Came a heavy sigh.

‘If there are still days left in us, we have people depending on us here.’ It felt like an empty lie. Lost in the middle of nowhere, if the two wouldn’t end up bleeding out, the cold of the night would take care of it. It felt so strange and idealistic coming out of her mouth. And yet she couldn’t shake the hope and the refusal to give up. Fucking pretentious woman, rubbing off on her like that. It felt like something still worth hanging on to because it was something Ryder would typically say.

‘SAM?’

She checked once more, clearing her throat through thick blood.

‘We’re still here.’

Her vision blurred again.

‘You better keep her alive.’

‘I assure you my functionality is 100% dedicated to this sole task. Your vital signs are also dropping at an alarming rate, Sloane.’

‘You said you’re 100% dedicated to her, you jerk. What are you doing reading my vital signs?’

‘I was instructed by Eyon not to lose sight of your wellbeing either.’

She would have laughed if there had been any power left in her.

‘Wellbeing, my ass.’

‘Do not worry. My priority is the Pathfinder. I was just making conversation so that you could stay focused.’

I think it’s kinda late for that. She wanted to say but couldn’t figure out if the words made it past her lips or not.

She almost slipped into unconsciousness when a beeping sound reached her. It felt so distant, miles away. Then silence. And then it happened again. And again.

The woman struggled, her head back up against the stone. Ryder’s omni-tool.

‘SAM…’ was that even her own voice?

‘Incoming connection from the Tempest. Ryder authorized tracking system from my terminal on board the ship. It means they are orbiting the planet but they need confirmation to narrow down the signal. I am unable to manually perform the task.’

But the AI didn’t need to finish its robotic input when Sloane amassed her remaining strength to crawl to Ryder and slam her bloodied fingers against the omni-tool.

The connection flashed green.

‘Response acquired. Coordinates established. They are preparing for descent.’

Through her lips, harsh breathes came out. She leaned down on her arm but it trembled, gave in, and her entire body followed. With one last attempt, Sloane pushed herself on her back, by Ryder’s side.

The wind against her face wasn’t kind, bringing sand over her aching skin. She thought she heard Ryder shift back to consciousness with a huffed laughter.

‘It’s ok if you decide being queen of Kadara is a better suited job for you after… this.’

Sloane didn’t answer. Didn’t know how to; so she just stared at the same sky she shared with Ryder. She was right; it wasn’t a half bad view.

‘We’re in this together.’

Before her eyes closed, she took in the stars, bright and haughty. Her last clear thought was how among them, one was the brightest; and it was getting closer and closer.