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Soulmates were funny things.
For most people, there was an ever present awareness lurking in the back of your mind: someone is out there for you . If you were older enough than your soulmate, you could feel when they were born—a sudden snap, a new mark on your skin, and a piece of you fell into place you hadn’t even been aware you were missing. Alec couldn’t imagine what that felt like—as long as he’d been alive, there’d been a gentle presence coursing warm and familiar under his skin; a hug he couldn’t quite feel.
Most people never met their soulmate; making the physical connection with your soulmate long enough for the bond to cement was rare. Alec’s parents weren’t soulmates, and Izzy was no closer to finding hers than Alec. Jace was the opposite of the siblings; it seemed that every time he met someone new, Jace convinced himself that person was his soulmate, even if his bond didn’t change. Alec had lost count of how many people he’d claimed, by this point. Alec himself didn’t pay much attention to his soul mark, a tiny, swirling mark on the crook of his elbow that would supposedly light up with color if he met the person carrying its match.
Finding your match had always been a huge industry—there were a number of apps designed to do just that—but Alec didn’t bother with trying to find his soulmate. He was too busy with his burgeoning law career, and Alec wasn’t much for romance besides. Occasionally, he could feel a quickening of his heartbeat, or a wash of laughter overcoming him, or a momentous wonder at beauty of the world as he walked down a dingy New York alley. Whoever Alec’s soulmate was, he was a happy, loving person, and Alec occasionally felt guilty for the constant low buzz of annoyance his soulmate must have felt from Alec.
But that was pretty much all of the thought Alec gave the matter. He had a family he loved, a great career—he didn’t need anything else. If he thought occasionally about having someone to listen to bad pop music and try sketchy restaurants together, something real, rather than one night stands and short-lived flings, that was no one’s business but his own.
~
“There are so many people,” Alec said, staring at the crowds of tourists milling around the Eiffel Tower basin.
Izzy rolled her eyes, making a beeline for their hotel, bag wheeling behind her. “Oh my god, only you would get a free trip to Paris and complain about it. I should have brought Jace.”
“Why didn’t you?”
Izzy sighed, speaking slowly as if she were talking to a small child. “Because if I had brought Jace, then I would have had to bring Clary, and then Simon would have had to come, and then Maia would have came. . .I love them all, but my plus one wasn’t designed for increasingly complicated love triangles.”
“Yeah, but we came to Paris watch you present at a Sorbonne. Not to actually see Paris.”
“Oh my god,” Izzy huffed again. “First of all, the presentation is one day. Secondly, no one’s saying you have to stay at the conference the whole time. Go! Explore!”
They checked into the hotel, taking a minute to drop off their bags and freshen up. When they arrived at the Sorbonne, Alec had to admit it was breathtaking. Beautiful towers arched over them, and Alec swore he felt a little more intelligent just walking in. Izzy was going to catch flies, her mouth was so wide open. “Marie Curie stood in this very courtyard,” she said in a hushed tone.
Alec rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help but be proud of her all the same. After checking in, Izzy was quickly whisked away by a young, harried looking woman in glasses and a clip board. Alec took a second to walk around—there were a number of people presenting academic posters in the main hall. Alec didn’t understand what most of them said, but he knew this conference was a huge deal in the world of forensics, and the fact that Izzy had been invited to speak on a panel was a huge honor.
Alec had no idea what she talked about during her presentation, even though she’d tried to explain her research to him multiple times, but there was a steady burst of applause at the conclusion, and Izzy, usually unflappable, was blushing, smiling brightly.
It took awhile for Izzy to make her way back to Alec, besieged by sycophants wanting to talk to her. When she finally made her way through the crowd, Alec hugged her tightly. “You did great. I’m so proud of you.”
She smiled. “Be honest, did you understand anything I said?”
“Not at all. But I can tell people were impressed.”
She rolled her eyes. “C’mon, let’s go celebrate.”
They mingled around the conference for a while longer, and eventually made their way to a stretch of loud, pulsing bars nearby. Alec usually wasn’t one for clubbing, but after a few shots, Izzy cheering him on all the while, he was much more willing. The press of bodies felt comforting rather than suffocating for once, and Alec found himself swaying to the music at each bar they passed through. They soon wound up at a gay club, and it wasn’t long before Izzy was swept up into the arms of a beautiful woman. Alec, confident with the liquor running through his veins, made the rounds himself, dancing with a variety of attractive men. As he pushed through the crowds, he lost sight of Izzy, but he couldn’t be too bothered. Alec felt like he was floating on air as he danced to the beat of the music around him.
But the time he and Izzy stumbled back to their hotel room, they were both grinning and laughing, heady with alcohol. They collapsed onto their beds, and the last thing Alec thought before falling asleep was fuck, I’m so happy I came to Paris.
The dulcet sounds of Izzy hurling hurling in the bathroom woke Alec up. He blinked, sitting up slowly—he’d drank way more than he should have last night, but somehow not only was he not hungover, but he felt like he could run a marathon. Izzy emerged from the bathroom eventually, looking pale and reeking of mouthwash. “Good morning!” he smiled.
“Oh my god, how are you so chipper?”
“I just feel . . .really happy this morning.”
Izzy squinted. “Okay, who are you and what have you done with my brother?”
He rolled his eyes, but he still couldn’t stop grinning. “I’m serious. I just feel. . .alive. You were right; Paris is amazing.”
Izzy stared. “Alec, would you say you feel giddy?”
“I guess.”
“And deliriously happy?”
“. . .Yeah?”
“Pull up your sleeve,” Izzy said, lunging across the bed and tugging up the sweatshirt he’d managed to throw on before falling asleep.
Alec, suddenly realizing what Izzy was after, tugged up his sleeve. His soul mark was swirling in greens and blues, looking almost alive. “I—“
“ Alec ,” Izzy cut him off. “You. . .you found your soulmate.”
Alec sat back, stunned.
“Oh my god,” Izzy said, practically bouncing. “Who is it?”
“I. . .” Alec paused, trying to take in the enormity of what was happening. “I don’t know.”
Izzy blinked. “You don’t know?”
“We went to so many bars last night. I danced with a bunch of people, and it was so crowded. . .”
Izzy moaned into her hands. “Only you. Well, we’ll just have to find him, I guess.”
They dressed quickly, heading in the direction of the strip of bars. Izzy forced them into a coffee shop first, still looking a little green—Izzy practically shotgunned hers, but Alec barely touched his, even though he was normally a monster without caffeine. He rocked back and forth on his heels. “We should call Jace. Tell him.”
“Slow down, Romeo,” Izzy said, a little more together now that she’d had coffee. “Let’s find him first.”
Retracing their steps was harder than Alec had imagined. The bars on the strip they’d hit up the night before were all similar looking, fading from one generic dance club to the next. He and Izzy had been buzzed enough that Alec wasn’t entirely sure which and how many they’d been to. He squinted at the facade of one. “Did we even go here?”
“I just have a lot of feelings,” Izzy muttered under her breath before continuing, “. . .I think? Maybe?”
Alec sighed. “Come on.”
The bar was open, thankfully, dimly lit and serving burgers on the sticky counter tops. Alec approached the bar, where a muscular man was wiping down the counters. He looked up as Alec and Izzy approached. “What can I get you?”
“Uh. . .” Alec trailed off, uncertainly.
Izzy rolled her eyes. “My dumb ass brother found his soulmate when we were out last night, but he can’t remember who it is. We’re retracing our steps, trying to see if we can figure it out.”
The bartender nodded, smiling slightly at Alec. “Congrats, man. Any clues on what to look for?”
Alec sighed, pinching his nose. “Uh. It’s a guy, probably?”
The bartender rolled his eyes. “Well, that narrows it down. How about this. Your guy is probably looking for you, too, right? Leave your name and number, and I’ll give it to anyone who seems legitimately looking for a soulmate.”
Alec sagged with relief. “Thanks.”
Now armed with a strategy, Alec and Izzy made their way down the strip. No one had asked about a soulmate at any of the bars so far, but Alec made sure to carefully write down his name and number at each place they visited. As they approached the last string of bars, Alec felt suddenly utterly excited. He bounced on his feet, unable to keep the smile off of his face. “I think. .. I think whoever he is, he just woke up and figured it out.”
Izzy grinned back. “So he’ll probably do like us, and retrace his steps if he doesn’t remember you. Let’s hit the rest of the bars, and then we’ll camp out in a cafe nearby and wait for him to find you.”
Alec nodded. They visited the rest of the clubs in the area, Izzy shamelessly flirting with the bartenders, and eventually made it back to the start. Afterwards, Izzy dragged them to a nearby cafe. “Order tea,” she said as they stood in line. “You’re too jittery for anything else.”
“Can you blame me?” Alec’s eyes widened. “Izzy, what if he only speaks French! I don't speak French.”
When they settled with their drinks, Alec couldn’t help but tap his foot nervously. He looked around at the various people in the shop, one by one. There was a handsome dreaded black man with a book and a latte—maybe that was his soulmate? Or maybe it was the tall, charming redheaded man with a frappucino, smiling at his phone.
“He’s probably not even here,” Alec muttered to himself.
Izzy rolled her eyes. “Relax, big brother. You’ll find him.”
“Mmm.”
Izzy cocked her head. “Are you excited?”
“I. . .” Alec shrugged, trying to process everything he was feeling. “I never thought it would happen, you know? I never really thought about. . .what he would be like, or what this moment would feel like.”
Izzy frowned. “You deserve love, Alec.”
“It’s not that I don’t think I deserve it. . .” Alec sighed. “It just always seemed like all the happy couples I know—soulmates or not—had to fight so hard for love. I never imagined I would care about anyone that much to make an effort so big.”
Izzy smiled. “And now?”
“And now I'm traipsing around Paris, looking for him.”
Before she could respond, Alec’s phone rang, an unknown number flashing across the screen. Izzy squealed, and Alec leapt for his phone, nearly dropping it in his haste to answer. “Hello?” he answered breathlessly.
“—Lightwood—?”
“Hello?” Alec said, shouting into the phone over the bristling static. He grimaced and checked his screen; there was barely a signal in the cafe. He bolted out the door onto the bustling sidewalk outside.
“—bar— soul mark—“
The voice was low, hopeful—echoing the blooming, tentative excitement in Alec’s gut. He paused for a minute, feeling the need suddenly to say something completely cheesy, like I’ve been looking for you forever. Which wasn’t true, technically, but just the smallest whisper of that voice made him feel like it was true. “I—“ he said, and was interrupted by a burly man, shoving Alec out of his way as he barreled down the sidewalk.
“Hey, look, asshole—“ Alec started, suddenly furious at someone who’d interrupt something so magical. The guy whipped around, a glare on his face; his arm, which was easily the size of Alec’s head, knocked into Alec’s chest. Alec watched in horror as his phone tumbled to the ground in slow motion, shattering into a million pieces.
“No,” Alec said, the man, already moving down the sidewalk again, completely forgotten. “No, no, no. . .”
“Alec, breathe.” Izzy was suddenly by his side, stroking his shoulder. “It’s going to be okay.”
“I—“ Alec was torn; half of him wanted to chase after the stranger and throttle him; the other half wanted to collapse and cry in the middle of the sidewalk. He sniffed as Izzy’s hand gently ran over his back.
“C’mon, he has to be near here. Let’s go back to the bars and find him.”
This time, there was no excitement in going from bar to bar. When they arrived at the same bar they’d started at that morning, the burly bartender, still slinging hamburgers, gave them a big smile. “Hey! You guys found each other!”
Alec swallowed. “He was here?”
The bartender’s face fell. “Yeah. I gave him your number. He hasn’t called yet?”
Alec opened his mouth and then shut it. Izzy stepped in, smoothly as ever. “My brother’s phone broke. Could you tell us the name of the man?”
The bartender frowned. “I’m sorry, I didn’t get his name. Right after I gave him your name, he ran out.”
Alec breathed heavily, sinking down to a nearby table. He focused on breathing in and out. It was only after a few minutes that he realized the bond, which had been full of so much joy and excitement earlier in the day, was conspicuously silent.
~
Alec boarded the plane slowly, not wanting to be separated from his sister’s unwavering support, but also glad to have a moment to himself. She’d been by his side constantly since he’d lost track of his soulmate two days before. None of their sleuthing, even with Izzy’s brilliant brain, had been able to find him. The bond had been silent since their aborted meeting, but the mark hadn’t changed, still glowing its beautiful greens and blues. Alec found himself touching the crook of his elbow almost unconsciously, seeking any bit of comfort. Izzy had wanted to push their flight to New York back, but Alec had deterred. They had family and responsibilities to get back to, and Alec had gone his entire life without his soulmate. The fact that he felt inexplicably hollow now, leaving his unknown soulmate behind on the other side of the world, was besides the point.
He was banking on whoever ended up sitting next to him immediately burying themselves in their headphones, leaving Alec to silently grieve on his own. His plans were thwarted, however, when an absolutely gorgeous man tucked his leather bag into the overhead bin before settling next to Alec. His dark eyes were rimmed in kohl, and his hair looked so soft and voluminous that Alec had to sit on his hand to keep himself from reaching up and running his fingers through it. Alec knew he was gaping, a little, but he couldn’t help it.
The man smiled hesitantly at Alec as the stewardess went through flight instructions. “Enjoy Paris? Or are you from here?”
Alec shook his head. “No, I’m from Manhattan. Just visiting. It was. . .nice,” Alec finally settled on. He didn’t want to burden some random handsome stranger with the tragic comedy of his love life. “You?”
“It was something,” the man said, and then quickly changed the subject. “I have to say, even though all the baguettes were amazing, I missed good old fashioned New York bagels.”
“Oh me too.” Alec found himself chuckling for the first time in two days. “My favorite is Givers and Bakers on 95th; have you been there?”
The man nodded. “Givers and Bakers is good. But Bagelista on 72nd is way better.”
Alec gasped, mock offended. “No way! Givers and Bakers has asiago bagels straight from heaven.”
“Please,” the stranger said, rolling his eyes. “Clearly you’ve never had Bagelista’s poppyseed.”
Debating about bagels quickly became a debate about pizza, and the conversation flowed from there. The in flight movie was Pirates of the Caribbean; they watched it together, the man making snarky comments about Johnny Depp’s eyeliner.
Alec sighed. “Will Turner was the reason I first realized I was gay.”
The man laughed. “For me it was Ocean’s Eleven. Watching George Clooney and Julia Roberts opposite each other did things to me.”
“They were siblings!”
The man waved his hand dismissively. “A fact that mattered not to my teenage libido.”
As the plane hit the tarmac, Alec swallowed, trying to be brave. He was feeling a little reckless with having found and lost his soulmate in less than a week, and all he knew was that this man made him like everything wasn’t completely awful. Alec didn’t really believe in fate, but maybe this was the universe giving him a sign. “Would you like to go get a bagel sometime? I can show you why Givers is the best in the city,” he asked.
The man shifted, suddenly tense. He didn’t meet Alec’s eyes. “Normally I would say yes. . ., but I’m afraid I’m not in the best place for something romantic right now.”
Alec nodded, disappointed. “Oh. Okay.”
Neither one of them said anything after that, and they sat in awkward forced silence before the plane slowly emptied. When it was their turn to exit, the man hurried until he was quickly out of sight. It was only after they disembarked Alec realized he had never even learned the handsome stranger’s name.
~
Alec tried to throw himself back into life as much as possible. He got a commendation from his boss he was working so hard, and Jace and Izzy drug him out to bars whenever he wasn’t at work. He had more than his fair share of hook ups—he did his best to look for a twin spot on their elbows, but he also found himself looking for the handsome stranger from the plane.
When one Saturday morning his run took him by Bagelistas, it seemed like fate. He entered and ordered a poppy seed bagel with butter, settling down at a table in the corner. He pinched off a piece of the steaming bagel, unable to keep from moaning. Damn. It was good.
“See, I told you they were better,” a voice from behind him said.
He turned to see the man from the plane. He had still been gorgeous when they’d first met, but now that he was standing before Alec in all of his glory, Alec realized he’d looked wan and tired on their flight back from Paris. Today he was in a silky royal blue shirt and dazzling eyeliner—he looked like he’d come straight off of a runway.
Alec tried to act less flustered than he was, especially given he was in running tights and a beaten up t-shirt. He glanced down at his bagel. “Sorry, Givers is still better.” The man snorted, and hovered awkwardly before Alec jumped, waving him to sit at the empty seat across from him.
The man paused, opening his mouth and closing it again. Alec waited patiently, a skill he’d learned in law school. Finally, the man said, “I want to apologize for the abrupt way I left the flight. I had a not so great experience in Paris, and I wasn’t quite myself. But I’m glad I ran into you again; talking with you was the best I felt since that whole mess happened.”
“It’s okay,” Alec demurred. He didn’t feel it was his place to ask what the mess exactly was, and besides, Alec knew all too well about upsetting experiences in Paris. “I’m just glad we saw each other again.”
“Yes, it’s quite fortuitous, isn’t it? Anyway, if the offer is still on the table, I’d love to go on that date.”
Alec snorted, sliding half of his bagel over. “I’d say we’re already here, aren’t we? But we should probably tell each other our names before this goes any further.”
“You don’t eat cream cheese on your bagels either? Bless you,” the man said before shaking his head, continuing. “Right, I realized we never introduced ourselves when I spotted you. I was about ten seconds way from yelling ‘hey you.’ I’m Magnus.”
“That would have been appropriate, because ‘hey you’ is my name.” Alec teased. Magnus rolled his eyes. “But most people call me Alec.”
“Alec,” Magnus said, his face falling. “Short for Alexander, I assume?”
Alec frowned. “Yeah. Why do you look so disappointed? Are you more of an Alexi kind of guy?”
Magnus smiled for a second, and Alec cheered with victory internally. “No, I just. . .Oh, it’s so stupid, and not something I should be discussing on a first date. It was an Alexander that broke my heart in Paris.”
“Yeesh,” Alec winced. “Well I can promise you, not all of us are complete idiots. Which he would had to have been, to dump you.”
Magnus snorted. “That’s the even sadder part—he didn’t dump me. We never even met.”
“Huh?”
“I bumped into my soulmate in a random club in Paris. Got the glowing mark and everything. I didn’t realize until hours later. I spent all day looking for him. He’d left his number at one of the bars—I called him, but he called me an asshole and hung up on me halfway through. I tried calling back a few times, but he never picked up again, so I took the hint.”
Alec stared. “Call the number.”
“What?”
“ Call the number.”
Magnus stared, bewildered, but he eventually pulled his phone out, tapping through it before sitting it down. Alec could hear the tinny ring from across the table.
Alec’s phone, from where it was sitting on the table, buzzed.
“You’re. . .you’re Alexander Lightwood?”
“I go by Alec. . .I only told them my full name because I thought it would be easier to find me.”
“Well, that backfired,” Magnus said, still shocked. “Why did you—“
“I was in a cafe nearby,” Alec hurried to explain. “I ran outside to get a better signal, and some guy shoved me. I called him an asshole and he shoved me again. I dropped my phone and it shattered.”
“So when I called you back—“
“I was in a Verizon store, crying at a scared Parisian cashier. When I finally got a new phone, it hadn’t backed up your number.”
“Oh my god,” Magnus said, but a slow smile was breaking on his face. If his eyes were wet, Alec wasn’t going to say anything. Alec’s certainly weren’t dry.
“We sat on a plane next to each other for nine hours.”
“Oh my god,” Magnus repeated. “I told you about my weird incest crush on the Oceans!”
“Wow, I can’t believe my soulmate is a pervert,” Alec said. His accompanying laugh was a little wet.
“Can I—“ Magnus cut off suddenly.
“Anything,” Alec said, even though he wasn’t sure what he was agreeing to. Honestly, if Magnus asked him to fuck right in the middle of the cafe, Alec probably wouldn’t say no. It shocked him a little, the intense devotion he felt towards a man he’d only properly met five minutes ago.
“Can I see your mark?” Magnus asked quietly.
“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours,” Alec teased, already pushing the sleeve of his shirt up.
Magnus gasped as his mark became visible. His hand reached out tentatively, and, after an encouraging nod from Alec, Magnus swiped his thumb over the swirling mark. Alec felt like electricity was rushing through his veins. All at once, he was overcome with joy and love—the bond had opened back up, he realized.
Magnus pulled his hand away, and Alec keened at the loss. But Magnus simply unbuttoned and rolled his own sleeve up, revealing a blue-green mark identical to Alec’s.
He bent forward, pressing a small kiss to the mark. Beneath him, he felt Magnus blossom with affection.
Soulmates were funny things, indeed.
