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When Ike shows up drunk at Hunter's door at two in the morning with his collar popped and his eyes barely fluttering open, the first thought that passes through his drunken mind is that Hunter should burn his Star Wars pajamas. The ginger doesn't have an excuse for wearing the same ridiculous clothes now that they're free from the Academy and back in the real world.
Hunter can more then easily run to a convenient store, something Ike has never done, obviously, because he has standards, and buy new pajamas. There's no reason to still own those cotton monstrosities.
Ike is standing on the dusty welcome mat, head turned to his left to look down the hallway, and his breath catches in his grin.
"Greetings, ol' chap. If it isn't my favorite Toronto virgin." Ike has a bottle of scotch in his hand that he waves in salutation, and he pushes his way into the apartment without waiting for an invitation from his old roommate.
"You do know what time it is, right?" Hunter whispers as he shuffles the door shut. It's hard to take him seriously as he crosses his arms, giving Ike a perfect view of the robot droid that's on his sleeve.
"Of course I do. We don't all have your time telling affliction, bud."
The apartment is just big enough for two college students. At least, that's what Hunter always says when Ike informs him that it's fit for peasants. When Casey decided to go back to school, Hunter had already made the decision that he would follow her anywhere. It's far enough away from campus that they don't hear the noise of late night parties, and when they wake up screaming from night terrors about ancient towers and gunshots and a figure named David, they don't disturb the neighbors.
It's mostly filled with Casey's stuff because Hunter's only material goods are comics and DVDs. It's filled with worn out furniture and lined with cheesy photographs Casey took with her new camera.
"Casey is asleep in the bedroom so keep it down, ok? What's going on? Are you ok? Is Jade alright?"
"I'm reluctant to tell you this, because I don't want to shatter the perfect image you have of me in your mind." Ike slides down on to red leather couch, nearly sliding off it as he kicks his shoes off.
"None of what you just said is even remotely true, but continue." Hunter rubs his eyes, sitting down across from his old roommate.
"I think I've made a terrible mistake." The scarf wearing boy mutters as he takes another gulp of his drink. He throws his head back dramatically, and yawns. Ike doesn’t actually say it, but Hunter can see it in his eyes, a serious yet unspoken I need help.
"Start from the beginning." Hunter groans, settling back in his chair, preparing for a long night.
"Do you happen to remember the infuriating ginger girl we went to school with?" Ike chews on his bottom lip, momentarily losing his aura of smugness that he usually has down perfectly.
"Jade. Yes, of course I'm familiar with her. She's going to be the godmother of my future children. She's also girl who you've been dating for four years. We all just had brunch on Wednesday."
"Back to me." Ike snaps lazily, "There was an incident after dinner. She said something."
"Like what?"
"She told me," Ike jolts up, bracing himself with his brow knitted in concern, "That she loves me." Ike repeats and he makes the words sound so dirty. Then he releases a breath as if he can't believe he was able to even get the phrase out.
"Wow." Hunter drawls, "What a... Jerk move? I'm sorry. I'm not seeing the problem here?"
"You're useless." Ike exclaims hopelessly, hands fluttering to his forehead.
"Jade is pretty much the best thing that ever happened to you. You're only bearable when you're with her. Why wouldn't you want her to-"
"Don't say it." Ike warns.
"Fine. What's the problem?"
"I freaked out, Hunter. Then she got embarrassed and I got drunk. She kicked me out of my own apartment. I'm still not sure how she's allowed to do that, but she did." Ike almost knocks over his bottle as he begins to pace the floor, eyes squeezed shut. The redhead is like a hurricane when she's angry. Or maybe a forest fire would be a better comparison. It's best to just stay out of Jade's way and hope you don't get caught in the wake of her destruction.
"Ok. So why did her confession freak you out so much?" Hunter has seen enough shrinks in his day to know the drill. He just has to find the root of the problem. Knowing Ike, it's probably buried under layers of intense daddy issues.
"Because I can't be tied down, obviously." He flicks his scarf over his shoulder and smirks. His hair is still perfectly gelled in place.
"I hate to be the one to reality check you, but you almost died to save Jade when we left the Academy. You've been living together for longer than me and Casey and have been an old married couple since the day you met."
Ike stops right in front of the refrigerator and whips his head around to make some sort of rebuttal, but his mouth closed after a few seconds. He's silent.
"Let's try this again. Why did Jade's confession freak you out so much?" Hunter debates about putting real clothes on but ultimately decides that he's more comfortable in his cotton pajamas. He crosses his legs, and tries to look as attentive as possible.
"Because she didn't mean it. She thought she meant it, but she didn't really. We were tortured and brainwashed in that place. We needed each other to survive, and now that we're out of there, she's still stuck in that mindset. Ellsworth thinks she needs me." Ike's tone gets lower and more brittle as he remembers the sleeping blonde in the next room. He huffs and stares at Hunter with a wide eyed expression of self loathing.
I have to do it. I have to push her away. Can't you see that? Because I ruin every good thing that comes my way. I can’t ruin her. Not now. So I’ve got end it. Because I can’t do it, I can’t hurt her. I have to and I’m sorry-
"That's the biggest load of crap I've ever heard." Hunter says before he can think of a better response, and his palms get sweaty. That's more ridiculous then all the stories Ike told him about his intimate encounters with celebrities and princesses.
He thinks Ike is about to freak out, as this is the most out of character he's ever seen his old roommate be. Ike glances uneasily at the photo of he and Jade that's hanging on the refrigerator with an unfamiliar expression. It was taken the first year they were out of the Academy, and Hunter can't decipher the look in Ike's eye as he studies it.
"You really believe all that crap you just said?" Hunter whispers sadly. Then something clicks inside the redhead's mind. Ike is trying to do the right thing. The problem is, he's never had a good sense of right and wrong.
Ike quirks an eyebrow skeptically, putting his drink down on the counter as Hunter finally catches his attention.
"Jade is one of the strongest people I've ever known and she's smart, Ike. Real smart. She's had plenty of chances to dump your sorry ass, but for reasons I'll never understand, she hasn't. You two are good together. You're good for each other." Hunter's words settle in for a full minute. He counts how long the silence lasts before Ike responds.
"Just because you and Goldilocks found your picture perfect storybook ending doesn't mean everyone else will, Hunter. That's not how real life works." Ike remarks coldly, inspecting the contents of the fridge and looking disappointing with the results.
"Why are you so opposed to letting yourself be happy? You're going to ruin it. Jade loves you. That should be good news."
"Well, it's not." Ike finally snaps, and his eyes glimmer. But that can't be right. Ike doesn't cry. That's something actual humans do, so it must be the alcohol in his system. "Because everyone who loves me leaves me. My mother would rather be in hell than in the same room as me, and I could barely pick my father out of crowd. So why should I wait around for Jade to realize that deep down she hates me too?"
The squeaky door across the room opens and Casey comes stomping out with her pink robe tied around her waist and her hair pulled back in a messy bun. Ike can't believe this is the girl who once led a rebellion against the Academy. Her expression is somewhere between pissed and unimpressed. Hunter grips the side of his chair, knowing how Casey reacts to her sleep schedule being disturbed. This is not going to be pretty.
"Guess who I just got off the phone with?" Casey pauses for a moment for the effect and the slides her phone across the counter, "You better have a damn good reason for breaking my best friend's heart."
Then she just stares at Ike. The intensity of it alone is enough to make him sober up. Oh. There she is.
"Ah, Goldilocks, you're looking strapping as ever-"
"Now is not the time." Casey says with a shake of her head. She cracks her fingers and then stretches her arm back, vaguely threateningly, "I'm going to make this simple, douchebag. Do you remember our last day at the Academy, when we realized Jade was missing?"
"Yes." He starts carefully. He knows Casey is getting at something so he doesn't want to admit anything.
"Do you recall what you said to me when we found out she went down to the cylinder? That she was going to sacrifice herself." Something flashes behind the blue in Casey's eyes, "Do you remember when we thought she was gone?"
"I said," Ike bites down as he looks pointedly at Hunter, aggravated that he has to respond aloud, "That I needed to find her."
"That's right. Not that you should find her, or you wanted to find her. You needed to find her. After years in hell, we were so close to freedom that we could taste it, and you bolted back into school without a thought. I came in after you, charging back on to the school grounds. What did you say to me then?"
"I said that it wasn't worth it. I couldn't care less if we escaped if she wasn't with us." His voice is quiet again, like he's reliving the scene in his mind.
"Life is better with Jade. You are better with Jade. I think you know that." Casey crosses her arms, and flicks the light off.
"I suppose." Ike admits uneasily. Though the truth had already settled in his chest. It's something he's known for years. He needs her.
"Then what are you doing here, dipshit?" His blonde archenemy asks, shaking her hand at him. "Jade is the one you have to tell that to."
"Ok." Ike says as if this was obvious to him all along, nodding his head, "Thank you, Blevins. Once again, Hunter, you were completely and utterly useless to me. And please, for the love of Abraham, get new pajamas. You have a girlfriend for crying out loud." Ike begs in disgust. He thought some of his charm rubbed off on Hunter during their time as roommates. Apparently the ginger learned nothing from him.
"If you don't get back to Jade and apologize, you won't be able to say the same."
Casey's laughter echoes through the apartment, as she's already retreating back into bedroom.
She's sure she'll get a full report on everything that happens when Jade calls her in the morning. It better be a happy call, or she'll make Ike's time in the damp cells beneath the Academy seem like a freaking vacation.
"Thank you for finally opening the door. I'm very drunk. Your makeup is a mess. I didn't want to ruin you. Does that make sense? I love you." The foreign words feel strange in his mouth, and they are four hours late, but Ike presses on, "I should have said it before. I didn't want you to love me because I didn't want you to leave me. In my mind, those two actions are irrevocably intertwined. I know- that doesn't make sense, but it does to me. I shouldn't have bolted like I did. I'm not going anywhere. Not as long as you'll have me."
Ike has never said it to anyone. Not to his mother or father. Never to any of the girls he was with. But he says it to Jade and it feels true. He doesn't know much about love. He thinks he means it, and once he says it aloud, there's no taking back. Love is humoring someone by praying with them in a shadowy cave, risking your life to bring them home, and doing something stupid just to see them smile.
Jade leans in the doorway, blocking his way inside. Her defensive stance crumbles in a matter of seconds. She starts crying immediately, in typical Ellsworth fashion, and she still keeps gritting her teeth like she's waiting for the right moment to chastise him. It never comes.
She lets herself fall forward, rushing into his arms. When Ike holds her, she smells like cinnamon and he feels her breath against his neck. He remembers the first time she let him hold her. It was right after they buried Hisao and Zoe and they both tried to forget about it afterwords. Neither succeeded.
"...I'm here." He whispers because he knows how his voice calms her down. Her heart is racing in her chest and he feels it hammer steadily against his. Jade's death grip on his scarf loosens slightly, and there's a slight smile on her face as she opens the door to let him inside.
(What Ike doesn't remember is that he's already said it. He already told Jade those three little words back at the Academy. They were still kids back then, scrappy kids who's only real concern was survival.
Jade always snuck out from under the covers once Ike was asleep, snoring intently with his arm tucked under the pillow. They were leaving tomorrow. The plans were laid out and Casey had reviewed everyone's specific jobs so their big escape from the Academy would go off without a hitch.
A sacrifice is always demanded. Jade knew it, and she was more then willing to be it. If it meant freedom for everyone else, for Casey, for Hunter, Ike, and all the other innocent kids, then she would be happy to pay. Nobody knew her plan for tomorrow. Someone had to occupy the cylinder. She would sneak down once everyone was through the tunnel and loaded on the bus.
"You're leaving." Ike muttered, half asleep. His eyes didn't open and she didn't even think he had realized she was there. Ike had been looking so tired lately, ghastly pale with heavy circles around his eyes. He looked a spirit. It seemed like a pretty fitting description to Jade, he only acted like the ghost of the boy he used to be.
For a brief moment as Jade climbed down the bunk bed ladder, she panicked. There's no way Ike could know what she was planning.
"Yeah." She whispered gently, in case he was just talking in his sleep, "Sleep well, dipshit. I'll see you tomorrow." Jade lied, something she's never been very good at, but he was half asleep. Ike wouldn't notice how her voice broke the tiniest bit or how she couldn't break her gaze away from his face.
She considered doing something sappy like brushing the loose strand of hair away from his eye, but that would be pointless. Hunter and Ike were supposed to be positioned on the north side of campus when all hell broke loose tomorrow, so she won't see him again. Jade never had a goodbye with her mom, so she doesn't feel they need to have one now. She just crawled into bed with Ike for a while because his mattress was way more comfortable then hers. It was their last night in the Academy, and somehow Ike convinced the faculty to load him up with extra pillows.
"I love you." He muttered and then rolled over, flopping to the other side of the bed. A symphony of snores followed, so Jade didn't have time to react.
Not 'love you'. Not 'love ya'. Not some vaguely gross pickup line to get her to follow him.
I love you. She almost said it back. But that would be selfish. She was going to die tomorrow, and you shouldn't confess your love to someone and then run away.)
"What are you smiling about?" Ike asks her as he's allowed to renter his apartment. He smells like his father's whiskey and she wonders where he's been for the last few hours. He tosses his coat next to her leather jacket by the couch.
"Nothing." She answers, looking away, and every single one of her dimples are showing. Jade has a light tan from their strolls through Coney Island and her nightmares barely come around anymore. They are utterly free and morning glories are just flowers and the most dangerous thing she encounters on a daily basis is Casey in the morning. What doesn't Jade have to smile about?
She remembers the days when she never thought she would smile again. Those days are etched in the lyrics in her notebook and the charred ashes of the bible she burned behind the barn. Now, her days are memorialized in goofy pictures taken by the pier and in empty takeout containers from a million different restaurants. After all, they're in New York, and Ike insists there's no reason to eat at the same place twice when they have so many options.
Life is good. Jade survived, so no matter what, she needs to forge on, for Jun, Zoe, Vanessa, and all the others that didn't make it home.
"Oh, I almost forgot. Of all the shocking things I've said tonight, I'm afraid this will shake you the most." Ike warns her, "Do you remember that dreadful ginger roommate that I had back in the old academy days?"
"Hm. Always running late? Eyes green like apples? Maybe vaguely." She rolls her eyes, tapping a finger against her freckles cheek as she laughs.
"Well- I'm not even sure if I can get the words out. He was wearing-wait for it... Space themed pajamas. From that dumb spaceship thing he loves." Ike squints his eyes in disgust. He waits for her reaction as he kicks his feet out on the couch.
"Star Trek, Firefly, or Star Wars?" She asks and leans in for him to clarify. He holds her gaze for a few seconds, and it reminds her of the look he gave her in a cave a lifetime ago.
"You know the names of them? How am I attracted to you?" Ike exclaims to the universe.
He doesn't bother waiting for a response.
