Chapter Text
Seeing someone’s memories was really a powerful thing… scary, almost. She really was sad she had to put Regina through that torture again, but it was all for getting them out, right? At least that’s what Emma had made Regina believe. Truly she couldn’t use Regina’s tear, the memory was too old, but she also knew that she’d never be able to involve the person she needed to in order to make this work. Regina would never allow it. So instead she spent the entire day working two jobs: ruining Henry’s first love and keeping Regina out of the way. Everything had gone surprisingly well, freeing Merlin and all. Emma was pleasantly surprised as well when no one was the wiser until a few weeks later. That’s when she realized she’d fucked up.
The usually perturbed brunette had come into Emma’s room, noticeably less imposing than usual. She looked unsure, concerned even, and Emma wasn’t used to it in the slightest. “Emma, um..”
Um? The Regina she knew never hesitated with what she wanted. She either spat it out or took it without bothering to ask. A shy murmur was something wholly unknown to either of them.
“You know how normally I have an issue with inner rage? That’s just gone. As if it was never there. I think you might have messed with my memories. I just sat and talked to Snow for two hours about babies and how beautiful Camelot is and that’s not... normal.” Regina was staring hard at Emma, as if she was trying to gauge a reaction or trying to scope out what Emma had done.
Emma only laughed and waved her off, turning away. “That’s called being a friend, Regina. You were just being nice.”
“I told Robin marriage was a good idea.”
“Okay, well that’s inaccurate seeing as you’ve told me repeatedly, and I quote, 'Marriage is for people whose bond can’t be sustained on trust alone.'”
“I also let Zelena have her voice back and took the cuff off.”
“Jesus, Regina, why?”
“She asked very nicely and I trusted her.”
“Are you hearing yourself? She asked nicely? What the hell is wrong with you?”
“I told you there was something wrong with me! Why else would I be here!” Regina’s voice echoed throughout the large room, stopping Emma in her tracks. She’d be lying if she said it wasn’t jarring to hear Regina raise her voice like that to her.
However, before Emma could respond, Regina ran over with a look of pure guilt on her face. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled. That was rude.” The blonde stared wide-eyed at the brunette who, was clearly not herself. Regina Mills never apologized, especially not to Emma, not for being frustrated and yelling.
“Regina… when did this start?”
“Oh um.. I don’t know. A while ago, I think, but it’s been getting more pronounced lately.”
“A while ago as in..?”
“I suppose right after we freed Merlin.” Well shit. She knew everything had gone too well.
But this didn’t mean she had to tell Regina about her wrongdoings. No, of course not. Instead she’d just...stall. Yeah.
“Okay well let’s go figure out what’s wrong with you. Maybe it has something to do with the day we got him out of that tree.” Regina nodded in agreement and to both of their surprises, grabbed Emma’s pale hand without second thought.
“Let’s try some of Merlin’s books, that’s where we got the spell from.” As Regina tugged though, Emma stayed put. Regina only tugged harder, using both of her hands to try and pull the blonde from the spot she was seemingly rooted in. “Come on, Emma!”
But Emma didn’t know what to do. She was freaking out. If Regina ever found out what happened, she would never trust her again and she’d worked so hard to gain that trust. Okay maybe she could figure out what was wrong with Regina without delving into the topic of having to use Henry. Everything would be perfectly fine assuming she could discover the problem before Regina did.
Suddenly Emma let herself be moved which sent her crashing into a startled Regina. “Whoops...” And just like a switch had been flipped, Regina could see her old endearing Emma back. It was in the way she rubbed the back of her neck and gave that silly crooked smile. If the former queen hadn’t been under her own personal curse, she might have attempted to hide the glimmer of hope in her eyes. Truly the most annoying thing about this issue was that it diverted her away from their primary goal: helping Emma get away from the Darkness. A curse consumed to save Regina and now here Emma was getting her best friend out of trouble again.
“Please, oh Dark One..” Regina droned; apparently not all of that familiar sass was gone. Emma gave Regina a confused look before catching on and rolling her eyes, giving up her fight. If she didn’t go along with the plan, Regina would know Emma was hiding something. Emma finally allowed the brunette to drag her along without hesitation, nearly tripping her up the stairs to the tower that had become their own little hideout in the past few weeks.
The room was just as they’d left it. Regina’s side was neat and clean with all of the books she’d searched through stacked by category and age; any book would be recoverable for sure. In contrast, Emma’s half of the room was a complete wreck. Unfortunately being cursed didn’t do anything to make Emma more organized. Upon seeing it, Regina sighed and finally let go of Emma’s hand in favor of moving to the books, starting to clean and rearrange Emma’s side.
The blonde shook her head and watched Regina work. Even cursed into niceties, the older woman couldn’t help but clean up after Emma. She was always looking after her, even when it was the last thing Emma said she wanted, Regina was there without fail. It was really nice though not to hear all the snarky comments though... It’d be wrong to keep her like this, wouldn’t it?
“Miss Swan, are you going to help me or no?” And she looked up with just the purest pout she’d ever seen-- something she’d swear was straight from Henry’s book of tricks. No, she had to fix Regina, no discussion. Even if it lead to Regina hating her for a while, she had to get her Regina back. Her Regina didn’t pout unless it was to mock someone and now here she was doing it only to get Emma to move a few steps. This wasn’t normal and she found she didn’t like it too much.
With a hesitant chuckle, the blonde sauntered over to Regina’s side and began stacking books in a corner of a desk. “Right, so what are we looking for?”
-----
Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.
Emma cautiously looked over her shoulder to where Regina was buried deep into her own book, searching for an answer to her troubles. Little did she know, Emma had found it and she was none too happy about it. If she’d known letting Regina’s tear fail in the spell would cause this, she would have found another way. She never would have hurt her and now... now she had to fix it.
“I know the problem.”
At her words, Regina shot over to Emma, ready to hear what the other had found. Upon hearing nothing but silence, she snapped her fingers close to the pale face, wanting to jolt her out of whatever trance she was in. “Um hello... do you care to enlighten me??”
She turned around to face Regina, staring into her worried face for arguably too long a moment before grabbing her arms tightly. “This is all my fault.” Emma started to shake her friend back and forth, very obviously freaking out. “Regina, this is all my fault... I’m so sorry. I never meant to-”
“Emma, stop it.”
And she froze. At Regina’s request she just stopped. And looked. “I took your pain away.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. You’re good company, but-”
“Regina, I literally took your pain away.”
“That’s asinine,” Regina waved her hand and moved to go see what Emma was talking about.
Emma hesitantly handed over the book, open to a page that explained the dangers of their spell backfiring mixed with an intense wish. Even though she’d come to a conclusion as to what happened as soon as Regina burst into her room demanding answers, she’d so hoped that she was wrong. Apparently not.
As Regina finished reading over the page, she slammed the book shut and promptly whacked it again Emma’s side. “You absolute idiot! How could you do this to me?”
“Woah! Ow!” Emma yanked the book from her friend’s hands and shoved it safely out of reach. “I can fix this!”
Eventually she just had to go ahead and lay out the entire story: how she’d seen Regina’s memories while accidentally wishing her pain away and how their first spell backfiring ended up stealing painful moments from her life. Really Emma had meant she wanted to be able to help Regina through her issues, not literally take them away completely, but that was the problem with wishing, right?
“How?” The brunette placed her hands on her hips, giving Emma a very familiar disapproving look. “Whether you had good intentions or not, I can’t live like this.”
Emma took a self-preserving step back and fiddled with the hem of her sleeve. “Well the book said I had to get your memories back so... that stuff we made before? Can you isolate part of the spell?”
“I suppose I could try, but it’ll take a while..” It was so weird seeing Regina not actively throttling Emma for this. She’d been hit with a book yes, but that was quite mild compared to the rage she should’ve been getting. “Let’s just do it.”
“My tear is what triggered this thing directly to me. That’s what you took from me.” The brunette shifted her weight onto the table, tapping her fingers against the wood like she did when she had to think really hard. “In that case, I guess if you have to get my memories, you can try gathering my tears?”
Emma didn’t have a better idea so she just nodded and moved out of Regina’s way. “How can I help?”
“You just sit and wait for this vial to fill,” Regina said as she placed everything in order, trying to arrange everything before she lost her train of thought. “If you drink this when it’s full, you should be able to keep it as you go and use it to collect my tears back.”
She watched Regina dash around the room like a mad scientist, mixing and pouring alien liquids into her makeshift systems.“Do you think this is going to work?”
The older woman stopped in her tracks to look back at Emma with a deadly serious look. “I have no other solution so I hope for your sake it does because if I’m still like this when you’re done- forced niceties or not- I will make your life hell.”
“Right... right, yeah. It’ll work,” Emma confirmed as she sat down to wait. If this didn’t work, Regina Mills would be after her ass, and not in the good way.
And so an hour and a half later, Emma was fighting sleep from sheer boredom as she watched the liquids and gases flow through the twisted glass tubes. “How can you stand waiting this long?” When she didn’t get any response after a few minutes, Emma looked over and was surprised to find Regina slumped over in a chair. She never slouched; it was practically a cardinal sin.
“Regina.”
Still no answer.
“Regina, wake up…” Emma pushed Regina’s shoulder, but she only slid out of her chair and limply hit the floor.
Emma frantically shook Regina from her spot on the floor. Everything had been going well until Emma’s gaze caught Regina collapsing out of the corner of her eye. The blonde was just quick enough to capture her and ease her gently into a booth, cradling her head probably more intimately than need be. She was starting to get seriously concerned as she poked Regina’s cheek, something she knew Regina absolutely hated, but she just wouldn’t wake up.
God, this was so bad. Regina would only hate her more if she told anyone so she was in this alone, but that potion. Was it done yet? Reluctantly, Emma left Regina on the floor and hurried over to the bubbling liquids. Upon close inspection, the vial was pretty much full so she figured it was safe to take. She went back to the unconscious woman as soon as she had the bottle secured and took Regina’s hand in hers.
“Listen, I’m really sorry. I know you can’t hear me, but I fucked up and I know you’re mad so I’ll let you yell at me all you want when we wake you up, okay?” Emma stared at the bottle only for a moment before gulping the liquid down. “I’ll be yelling at you for the taste of this though, god...” She choked and sputtered as she felt a strange heat coursing through her veins.
Suddenly she felt sleepy, and seeing as she currently felt too weak to move both of them to anywhere more comfortable, Emma resigned herself to settling in beside Regina.
And so there they lay, hand in hand on the floor of their tower.