Chapter Text
It’s been five months now ever since she decided to fly to Jeju and stay at their rest house in her mom’s resort.
It was supposedly just a week-long vacation, a short break from all the stress, work responsibilities, her constantly worrying mother, and all the memories left behind by her ex-girlfriend who broke up with her after a three-year relationship. There were lots of times where she had her pride crushed whenever she begged the girl to come back and failed miserably. It had a huge impact not only on her wellbeing, but it also started to affect the people around her—family, friends, co-workers, employees… she is desperate for a break.
She’d already abused herself by making bad decisions one after another, by giving too much of herself to someone who wasn’t as willing, by doing the dumbest things just so she could be with someone who clearly doesn’t want her anymore. She questioned herself a lot, what did go wrong? Did she get too consumed by her work? Did the stress from work took a toll on her appearance? Was it the sex? Did she miss anything?
There weren’t any indications of future break-up the last time they were together. It was a fine night, they were out for a nice, quiet dinner, when she dropped the bomb just like that.
“This is not your fault. I wish I could give you an explanation but even I don’t have the answer.”
Her head hung low as tears slowly gathered in her eyes.
“I woke up one day… only to realize that you’re not the one for me.”
She bit her lower lip, trying to hold herself together as much as she could.
“I just don’t-
Please don’t say it.
-love you anymore.”
A tear.
“I’m sorry, Sana…”
Another.
And another.
Five months have passed, and those words are still perfectly etched in her brain like a goddamn tattoo. Her scumbag of a brain never missed a chance to remind her of that day, with the clear sound of her cracking voice, with a vivid picture of her apologetic face stained with tears.
As per her psychologist’s advice, and also by her mom’s persuasion, Sana’s one-week vacation was extended, up until whenever she’s back on her feet again. Her mom suggested that Sana should take care of the resort while she’s there. She was against the idea of staying longer there—she’s very dedicated towards her work and she hates thinking how she’s letting this affect her, her work, and the people who depend on her. It’s killing her to go back to Seoul and go on with her normal life, but they had a point. She cannot work properly with this in her mind. She doesn’t want to be more of a headache to her employees and her dad’s company, considering that she’s on a high executive position. At least she can divert her workaholic self into managing the resort instead.
It was killing her that she let her feelings affect her this much. She detests herself for it. Sana’s not the type of person to crumble down just because of something stupid and dumb like feelings. But she did, and she never expected that it would be this bad, which makes it even more frustrating.
She didn’t expect it to take her this long to move on.
And if Sana’s going to be honest with herself, she isn’t quite there yet.
--
“Alright, that’s a wrap! Good job, everyone,” Jinyoung, the band’s manager, exclaimed as he led an applause for his team. “Now huddle up, I’d like to give out some few notes for you to focus on before your performance.”
The band members, Dahyun, Jeongyeon, and Chaeyoung, settled their instruments down before approaching Jinyoung. Despite being damn stressed from rehearsing their sets, they mustered up the remaining energy they have left in their systems to listen. They’ve landed on their biggest gig yet, a beach festival in Jeju, and judging from the given setlist, there are going to be a lot of bands and some idol groups that would be performing so they are expecting a bigger crowd. There’s no way they’re gonna let this one go without making a good impression to the audiences and to more potential invites.
“Remember. Our flight to Jeju will be leaving at 7AM, and we’ll be arriving there probably around 8 or 9AM. So prepare all your things and instruments tonight before you guys go to sleep. I don’t want anyone being irresponsible. We are not going back to your apartment just because a certain someone forgot to bring something, okay?” Jinyoung noted, giving their acoustic guitarist, Dahyun, a stern look.
Dahyun just scratched her head and sheepishly replied, “Yes, oppa. In fact, I already packed everything I need yesterday. Chaeng and Jeong can both vouch for it!” she added, pointing to the two short-haired brunette sitting in front of her.
“Oh yeah, don’t worry Jinyoung oppa. Me and Jeongyeon even helped her, just in case she might be dumb enough again to forget her acoustic amp and all the other things that are essential for a week-long trip,” Chaeyoung, their cajon player, replied in an uninterested tone, who’s currently busy wiping her black Schlagwerk cajon. Jeongyeon just nodded in agreement. Dahyun just put on a goofy grin when Jinyoung seemed convinced enough.
“Alright. That’s all. Dang, it’s already 11PM. Go pack up and rest as much as you can. The van will pick you up from your flat by 5AM. Got it?”
The members gave a collective ‘yes’ before proceeding to cleaning up the studio. They made it quick just so they can already go home and take a well-deserved sleep. No one didn’t even mutter a word while packing up their things towards the van, too tired to even open their mouths.
Settling down to their seats, everyone fished out their phones and earphones to listen to their own music playlists before slipping into a quick nap while on the road.
--
The gentle, chilly breeze of the beach at night never failed to calm Sana. It has been a routine—going out for a stroll on the seaside, a cold beer on hand, with her brown poodle named Waffles. As the cold sea water lightly approaches her feet along with some bits of sand, she would look up the night sky cluttered with a generous amount of shiny stars along with the perfectly bright, round moon. This is what she liked most about staying here—lesser air and light pollution, exposing the tiniest of stars. She’s always had an interest towards astronomy, although she did not pursue the field for her career. It’s something her and her dad had shared interests. When she was young, her dad would always bring her to a high, secluded area in a mountain near their neighbourhood, just overlooking the city of Seoul. They would camp out in there, bringing telescopes with them, and stargaze. Her dad would teach her some constellations and other heavenly bodies they could see, until she grew up and she would be the one correct her dad about it.
(“Hey, look! That’s Saturn! Go grab the telescope so we can see its rings!”
“No, dad, that’s Jupiter. You can check your telescope and this digital sky map if you won’t believe me,” Sana stated with confidence. After some minutes spent bickering about who’s right, Sana had the last laugh, and the last packed sandwich.)
The tranquillity the stars and the moon provide her remains unmatched. Whenever she looks at them, all her worries dissolves as her senses get blinded by the beauty of these heavenly bodies in the galaxy. Back in her apartment in Seoul, she bought a unit with large glass windows on the top floor so she can have a good view of the city and requested for a small customized ceiling window in her bedroom for a good night view.
“Hey, Waffles,” Sana called the little fella out, who was busy digging on the sand while chasing some tiny little crabs that run off due to disturbance. The dog’s ears perked up at the mention of its name, and ran to the source of it. Sana picked her up and pointed at the sky.
“I’m gonna give you a quick astronomy lesson. Look here. See that big, bright ball over there? That’s the moon. It reflects light from the sun so it could illuminate the earth at night. It can also affect the sea tides,” Sana stated with enthusiasm, in which the dog just responded with licking her hand.
“Don’t lose focus, Waffles! Now see that small shiny thing near the moon? That’s a planet called Venus, the second nearest planet to the Sun. Its atmosphere is almost entirely composed of carbon dioxide, and a little bit of nitrogen and sulfuric acid. Awesome, right? We should’ve brought the telescope with us.”
Waffles only stuck her tongue out and answered with loud breaths, probably brought by all the chasing she did earlier. Sana sighed, and faced her palm.
“I’m talking and teaching a dog some basic science knowledge. A dog. How sane,” Sana whispered to herself. She brought Waffles with her to Jeju, since she certainly can’t just let her be left alone in her apartment. She had the choice of dropping her off in her parents’, but she preferred to bring Waffles with her instead, so they spend some quality owner-pet time.
She brought Waffles down and let her run and play by herself. She trained the dog not to go too far away from her so she doesn’t have to tie her up in a branch or pole. Fishing out her cigarette box from the pocket of her university hoodie, she took one mint-flavored cigarette stick out and lighted it up with a silver lighter. Looking up, she blew the inhaled smoke out in the atmosphere as she was lost with her thoughts again.
(“Okay, so if I can name five constellations right now, I earn a kiss, right?” the long-haired girl asked her with eagerness, earning a light chuckle from Sana.
“Yeah, sure.”
“Okay. Here we go. That one’s the Taurus, then this one right here is the Gemini, while this one is… this one… Canis Major! And this—“
The girl was cut off by a sudden feeling of Sana’s lips gently pressing against hers. Pulling away, Sana cupped her cheeks and looked at the deep pools of her eyes.
“Eunha, you know you don’t have to do any of that just for a kiss, right?”
Eunha responded with a pout. “But I wanted to impress you a little bit. I’ve learned a lot, you know?”
Sana smiled warmly. “Of course I do. But you’ve already impressed me just by existing and staying by my side for this long. I know I can be unbearable sometimes. Even I wouldn’t date myself in any kind of alternate universe. I don’t know how you do it, honestly.”
Under the bed of stars and moon that’s illuminating the rest of the earth, she then gave her a long, warm kiss, in which Eunha gladly responded.)
As the wind danced and played with her silver hair, she also wished that the wind would take all these thoughts of her away and dissolve it in the air, but she also knew that she could only rely on herself to try her best not to let any memory of her enter her system. Stupid brain letting the memory of stupid Eunha control over her stupid senses again.
You look so damn pathetic right now, Sana. 5 months and you still think that maybe the stars would remind her of you? You’re unbelievably stupid! She dumped you for a reason, Sana. Stop living in your bubble of “what ifs” and “maybes” because there is none and she already made that pretty clear. Wake up.
It has always been the same thing that she says to herself. She laughed at her own musings, as she was struck by the reality that she’s the only one being left in this situation. No one but her. Everyone around her just continued on with their own paths and lives, while she’s stuck in here, still unable to move because of the unbelievable weight she had on her ankles, and she can’t go on no matter how much she wanted to.
Taking one last drag, she put the fire off the cigarette and threw it in a nearby garbage can along with the can of Heineken, as she called the attention of the little furball and treaded towards the rest house.
--
Fortunately, their manager was a very big dog person.
Dahyun and Jeongyeon argued about bringing Pancakes, a black and brown Chihuahua, with them to Jeju. They exchanged banters about things like “Who’s gonna feed it?” “Who’s gonna take care of it?” “Are you going to clean if it decides to poop everywhere in our room?” “WHAT IF SHE SMELLS?!” and a whole lot more complaints, mostly from Jeongyeon. Their problem had been given an answer when Dahyun called Jinyoung and asked him if she can bring Pancakes along, in which he responded with a “yes, of course!” enthusiastically. As the phone call ended, Dahyun gave Jeongyeon a smug grin indicating her win, while Jeongyeon just rolled her eyes off and continued with blow-drying her hair.
Meanwhile, Chaeyoung’s been busy watching ‘Monsters Inc.’ in their 32-inch HDTV, mindlessly digging inside the Pringles can she’s holding and munching on the snack simultaneously.
“Hey, have you guys seen my black baseball cap?” Dahyun inquired, only to be answered by silence. She was searching for it for thirty minutes now. Caps and snapbacks are one of her favourite accessories, and she doesn’t want to leave for a whole week without it.
Dahyun continued her search on the living room to ask Chaeyoung. “Chaeng, have you see my cap? The one I bought last week?”
No answer.
Chaeyoung is always like this whenever she’s busy doing something that concerns her interests. It’s like she shuts everything down and pours her focus on whatever she’s doing so she wouldn’t get disturbed. When she starts watching movies, playing games, or writing lyrics, it’d be like talking to air.
Dahyun took this opportunity to snatch a Pringle from her, but failed when Chaeyoung slapped her hand away just when she’s about to dig in.
“Ow! Why are you so damn selfish over a piece of Pringle?!” Dahyun screeched, clutching the back of her hand that’s now starting to get red.
“Every piece of Pringle inside this can is important for my wellbeing, Dahyun-ah. Don’t you know that by now? What a fake friend,” Chaeyoung replied calmly, her eyes not leaving the TV as the part where James was being choked by invisible Randall comes near. It is her favourite scene.
“Tsk. I bought a pack of Kisses by the way, and I’m not sharing any with you!” Dahyun retorted. She grabbed the remote near the end of the couch and turned the TV off right on Chaeyoung’s favourite scene as a revenge, which successfully got the latter’s attention, and is now glaring at her. Dahyun teasingly stuck her tongue out.
“GIVE ME THAT!” Chaeyoung yelled as she jumped from the couch, spilling the remaining Pringles from the can, and tackled Dahyun to reach for the remote. It would’ve been easy considering that there’s not much of a height difference between the two, but Dahyun moves like a hyperactive kid who just downed a whole bottle of Coke. She almost elbowed her in the process.
The commotion was halted when Jeongyeon walked towards them and being the tallest one, she easily snatched the remote from Dahyun’s hand and used it to smack the two’s heads.
“Stop playing around and start getting ready, kids. Jinyoung oppa’s already on his way here. Clean those Pringles up or I’m gonna tell oppa to hide your snacks,” Jeongyeon threatened. The two obeyed and proceeded to clean up the mess, only to see Pancakes, who came out of nowhere, chewing on the spilled Pringles.
“Oh wow, my dog got a taste of your precious snack and I didn’t. So much for being your friend,” Dahyun sourly commented.
“Just shut up and help me clean, this is your fault anyway.”
“Wait a minute—“
Turns out, Pancakes wasn’t interested with Chaeyoung’s favourite snack.
“MY CAP!”
--
“Sana-sshi?”
Three knocks on the door were enough to wake Sana up for she is a light sleeper, but that doesn’t mean that the same amount is enough for her to get up and answer it. She pretended not to hear it at all and buried her head with a pillow to block her ears from any possible noise, and her face from the intruding sunlight seeping through the curtains.
The maid tried to knock once again and spoke softly. “Sana-sshi, I know you’re already awake, please answer the door. The staff called and told me that new visitors are about to arrive at the resort. You have to go to the lobby in around 15 minutes, max.”
Sana groaned and grumpily pushed herself up. “Yeah, will be out in a few minutes!” she groggily shouted back. She stood up and tied the curtains of her large glass window, exposing a breath-taking scenery of the beach. If she only has 15 minutes to get ready, then her ass better hurry.
She took a quick shower and put on a fresh set of underwear blow-drying her hair. She picked out a plain white long-sleeved blouse, a pair of dark blue high-waisted jeans, and a pair of flats to match her outfit. After tucking the white bloused inside the jeans, she sprayed on a little bit of perfume before heading out.
--
“Wow.”
That was the first word that came out of their mouths as they arrived at the resort. Its architecture was modern and elegant, yet homey. It has three floors and a rooftop. The environment of the resort is really suitable for people who look for more than just a simple vacation—there were recreational areas, gym, and more facilities and services that offer a lot of activities ranging from fun and entertainment to peace and relaxation. Even the staffs are wearing proper uniforms that looked like those on five-star hotels. They could already tell that this is one of those expensive resorts rich and famous people go into.
“Jinyoung oppa, how the fuck did you manage to afford two rooms in this place?” Chaeyoung asked while looking around, appreciating every corner of the resort.
“You guys have worked so hard, and as your band’s anniversary gets near, here’s my present to you. Treat this gig as a vacation in disguise,” Jinyoung replied coolly while removing his sunglasses. The welcoming staff greeted them cordially as they walked towards the lobby.
“Everything in this resort is so damn magnificent. They also have two pools in here and another one on the rooftop,” Dahyun commented. “Look around Pancakes! It’s so beautiful, right?”
With the way the dog’s been waggling her tail, Pancakes seemed to be excited about the place too. Jeongyeon, on the other hand, was still slightly spacing out due to her interrupted sleep. She does appreciate the beauty of the place too, though.
“Welcome, guests. It’s a pleasure to have you here. Would it be okay for you to wait for a couple of minutes while we call the resort’s owner?” the receptionist greeted.
“Oh yeah sure,” he answered and took a seat on the comfortable couch, the three following right behind him. The view was wonderful and calming—the white sand, clear blue sea, and the soft crashing sound of the waves. Some other guests are already outside taking a morning swim, while others are relaxing while sunbathing.
Jeongyeon, who seemed to regain her senses back, smacked the back of Chaeyoung’s head.
“Stop ogling, Son. You’re too obvious even with those heavily tinted sunglasses, goddamn it,” she hissed. Chaeyoung just sheepishly rubbed the hit area and mouthed a ‘sorry’.
While they are examining the area further, the receptionist approached them once again. “Excuse me guests, the resort owner is already here.” She spoke in a soft voice.
“Miss Minatozaki, this is Sir Park Jinyoung and his band. They’ll be playing for the week-long beach festival, and they’ll be staying here until then,” the receptionist introduced. “Sir Park, this is Miss Minatozaki Sana, the owner of the resort.”
Despite being groggy still from the abrupt wake-up call, Sana bowed and greeted the guests with a warm and welcoming smile. “It’s a pleasure to have you and your band here, sir. Would you like us to ask our staff to help you with your luggage?”
“No, we got it from here. It’s not that much anyway,” Jinyoung replied.
“Alright. May I know the name of your band?” Sana politely asked.
“Hi, we are Resonance. We are a three-membered acoustic band. I’m Jeongyeon, the vocalist and band leader,” Jeongyeon responded with a smile, taking out her hand to shake which Sana courteously shook. “This is Chaeyoung, our cajon player,” Jeongyeon further introduced. “And—“
Dahyun cut her off and introduced herself. “Hello, I’m Dahyun. Acoustic guitarist.” She offered her right hand to shake since she’s holding her dog with the left one. “I see that you’re a Japanese?” she asked with a slightly weird Japanese accent.
“Yes. You speak Japanese too?” Sana asked in fluent Japanese while shaking her hand, which gave Dahyun goosebumps. Her voice sounds so good, she thought.
“Uhm… actually that’s all I can remember from the Japanese class I took when I was in college so,” Dahyun sheepishly rubbed her nape and shyly gave the girl an awkward smile.
Sana gave a warm smile in return. “It’s okay. Nice to meet you all. Cute dog, by the way,” she added, patting Pancakes’ head. “I hope you can enjoy your week-long stay in our resort.” She then turned her attention back to Jinyoung. “Shall we run down a couple of agreements and details before anything?” she kindly asked.
“Yeah sure. Can they go start settling their luggage to their room now?”
“Of course,” she answered. “Jinkyung unnie, can you show them to their rooms, please?”
Jinkyung bowed and gestured the three to follow them while Sana and Jinyoung sat at the couch. While they were waiting for the elevator, Dahyun kept glancing and staring on the silver-haired woman. Well, she wasn’t wrong about thinking that everything in this place is beautiful, from the structure and vibe down to the owner itself.
She seemed like she’s only in her early 20s, and she already owns a resort like this? What a successful woman.
Her thoughts were interrupted when Chaeyoung slapped her head with a rolled brochure.
“Stop ogling, Kim.”
Dahyun threw a ‘you-better-stop-that-or-I’m-gonna-elbow-you-in-the-gut’ look towards Chaeyoung. The latter just moved to Jeongyeon’s side to shield herself from the girl’s glare that seemed to bore holes through her soul. The elevator made a loud ‘ding’ and the doors opened, and as they entered the elevator, she gave one last glance to Sana, who was looking at their direction.
Oh shit, did she catch me looking?
The doors have closed, and she could only hope that Sana didn’t.
--
The moment they entered the room, Jeongyeon immediately plopped herself on the bed. She was the earliest to get up than the two since she has to make sure to wake them up. And it was not exactly an easy task, because Dahyun and Chaeyoung both sleep like goddamn logs.
“I’m gonna continue my nap. Don’t you dare play pranks on me while I’m asleep, I have a list of revenges I can play on you,” Jeongyeon said in a low, tired voice. Being the ‘sleepyhead’ in the trio, she always gets played on by the two pranksters. From drawing vulgar things in her face and body with a permanent marker (mostly from Chaeyoung), to shouting false alarms (mostly from Dahyun), she had to always remind them not to disturb her, with a threat of course.
Dahyun brought Pancakes down to play with her dog toys, and properly arranged her clothes from her travel bag to the wardrobe while playing soft music on her phone’s speakers. Chaeyoung went outside to the terrace to appreciate the resort’s view from the third floor.
“I’m gonna save a lot of money and buy myself a place near a beach as beautiful and relaxing as this,” she commented, inhaling a good amount of fresh air in the process.
“Hey, don’t you think that the resort owner is like, around the same age as us? Or at least Jeongyeon? She seemed so young,” Dahyun asked out of nowhere after stacking the remaining clothes and shutting the wardrobe door close. Chaeyoung walked back inside the room and closed the sliding glass door before turning the aircon on.
“She does. Cool, right? Owning a resort like this at such early age. No wonder you got the hots for her,” Chaeyoung snickered.
“What? I do not!” Dahyun yelled in her defense, looking at Chaeyoung ridiculously. Yeah sure, that Sana girl is so damn beautiful and attractive with her silver hair and pretty eyes, not to mention that she caught a whiff of her perfume earlier too (she smelled so good it clouded her thoughts for a while), but she gives off that vibe of a rich, snobbish woman who’d only hang out with people of the same class, so no. Definitely not her type. Although she wouldn’t lie that she didn’t get impressed about her reaching this level of success in her early 20s.
“Sure thing. She’s undeniably reeking of sex appeal. You even introduced yourself to her, been glancing back at her a lot of times, and now, you just brought her up out of nowhere. Of course you don’t. No way,” the short-haired girl sarcastically remarked further as she lied down the bed and put her hands at the back of her head to rest on.
“Okay first of all, I was just being polite. And I just find it amazing and unbelievable at the same time,” Dahyun retorted.
“What is? Her beauty or her success?”
“Her success! What—“
“So you didn’t have a defense for glancing back at her for like, I don’t know, more than ten times? You gotta learn how to be subtle by the way, I think she totally felt every stare you gave her.”
Dahyun quickly grabbed on a pillow and strongly chucked it towards Chaeyoung’s face. The latter caught it though, and thanked Dahyun instead rather than engaging to a pillow fight before hugging it.
“Fine. I find her attractive, yes, but no, I don’t like her like that.” Dahyun firmly stated.
Chaeyoung let out a long yawn before replying. “Whatever you say, Dahyun. Look at Pancakes, she doesn’t buy it either,” She mumbled as she slowly slipped into dreamland. Dahyun glanced at her dog, who’s also sleeping peacefully.
Being the only one left awake, Dahyun lied down at the last empty bed near Jeongyeon. Gently putting her earphones on while listening to ballads on low volume, she let sleepiness take over her. As she slowly loses her consciousness, she silently hoped that she’d also lose every thought of the silver-haired girl.
--
The week-long beach festival has officially started. As the sun started to set, more and more people had crowded the seaside area, from Jeju residents to local and foreigner guests from all neighboring resorts. The stage’s foundations were submerged underwater, so the stage is a bit suspended on top of the sea, placed in just exact distance from the shore so they can accommodate more audience. The first day’s lineup were mostly local Jeju bands with performances from three idol groups WJSN, Seventeen, and CLC. Each bands and performers were given the chance to perform 3-4 songs for their set.
Lying on her bed while cuddling with her pillow, Sana contemplated whether she should go and watch the concert. A part of her wants to loosen up and enjoy the event, but a bigger part of her wanted to just sneak in a little more sleep. She’s been sleeping a lot ever since she came here. Her psychologist says it’s an effect of depression, or maybe she’s just a sleepyhead. Or both.
Pushing herself to sit up, she grabbed her laptop and walked over to her table at the outside porch, clad in an oversized white shirt and short beach shorts. She can hear the band starting to perform and the collective cheers from the crowd from here. She had come to a decision to be a total introvert tonight and just probably watch movies and whatnot. Or check her social media accounts. It’s been so long since she logged in on any social media account she has. She was suddenly hit by a feeling of longing for her friends so she quickly opened her Facebook to give her friends a quick “Hey y’all, still alive and kicking in here” message.
While scrolling through her inbox which had a lot of unread messages, she stopped momentarily as her eyes landed on a familiar name.
She got an unread message from Eunha. She contemplated for a good five minutes on whether she should read it or just leave it unread for the rest of her life. She kept saying no to herself but her hands seemed like they have their own minds as her finger shakily clicked on the message. So much for self-control, huh, she internally smacked herself.
And boy, she should probably add that to the list of bad decisions she had ever done in her lifetime.
Jung Eunha (Feb. 23, 05:34:17PM): Hey, Sana. How are you doing? I hope you’re doing well. So uhm, I heard that you went to Jeju for a vacation. That’s really great, you should really take a break from all the stress back here in Seoul. Listen, I know that at some point, our break-up has something to do with your abrupt decision, and I know you told me not to say sorry ever again but I couldn’t help but to feel like I’m responsible and that no amount of apologies will ever compensate with the hurt I’ve brought you. So again, I’m sorry.
A blink and a tear.
Jung Eunha (Feb. 23, 05:38:32PM): But before we entered a romantic relationship, we were close friends first. And we eventually grew as best friends until then. This would probably too much to ask, but I really, really want us to back as friends again. I’m not pressuring you or anything, just… I miss talking to you. I miss our friendship. I miss you.
Jung Eunha (Feb. 23, 05:42:44PM): I really do hope that you’re doing well. Please always take care of yourself, yes? I still care for you, so please don’t hurt yourself in any way. Sorry again for sending you a message out of nowhere, I just need to let it out. I’ll be waiting until you’re ready, Sana.
Her sight got blurry as tears started gushing from her eyes. She can barely hear the music from the concert not far away, like her senses are suddenly failing her. That familiar constricting pain in her chest is back. All rational thoughts are once again clouded with a heavy fog of emotions and as if one bad decision for the day wasn’t enough, she clicked on Eunha’s profile to check on her.
Her breathing became unstable and her tears became uncontrollable as she stopped scrolling to read the status update.
Jung Eunha is now in a relationship with Kim Sowon.
She let out a laugh, a pity laugh for herself, for fucking up whatever progress she has built for months. All of her hard work on moving on has crumbled down to pieces, to dust, and there she is, left vulnerable, and back to square one. Again.
As much as she wished that she shouldn’t have seen that, that she shouldn’t have let feelings take over again, it is too late. Two consecutive awfully-made decisions are enough for tonight, and she closed her laptop shut, a bit hard at that.
She went to the bar inside the house and grabbed a bottle of vodka and a shot glass from the counter before returning to the porch. She sat down at the wooden chair, pouring a full shot and downing it like it’s nothing but water, embracing the burn lining down her throat. She looked up and stare at the stars, its shine being magnified by the waterworks in her eyes.
This is the universe giving her an intergalactic slap of cold, hard reality.
So she promised herself not to open any social media for a while, and for the umpteenth time, that she would stay away from anything remotely connected to her again.
--
“Idiots. Oh god I swear I’m gonna knock them down. Fucking stupid asses… Not waking me up to go to the festival…” Dahyun continuously cursed under her breath as she swiftly put on her flip flops and grabbed Pancakes before rushing out of the room. She woke up to a not-so-far-away sound of the concert, and her eyes were flooded with nothing but darkness. She blindly searched for her phone on the bedside table, slightly screeching from the offensive light coming from it when she opened it. There were three unread messages from Chaeyoung.
Chaeyoungie (07:47:23PM): Dubu! We’re already on our way to the concert. It’s about to start! Reply if u r already awake or smth
Chaeyoungie (08:13:32PM): Lol are u still sleeping, WJSN is about to come up on stage! CHENGXIAO IS SUCH A BEAUT
Chaeyoungie (08:41:45PM): Just text us if u up alr we’re kinda lost in the crowd rn
While waiting for the elevator, she fished her phone out of her pocket to finally give Chaeyoung a reply.
Dahyunie (09:24:54PM): WHY THE FUCK DIDN’T U GUYS WAKE ME UP HOW DARE U LEAVE ME ALONE AND PARTY WITHOUT ME IM SO FEELING BETRAYED RN DO U HEAR??? IM GONNA STRANGLE U BOTH WHEN I COME DOWN THERE
With a big, hard press on the ‘send’ button, she rode the elevator, huffing.
“They can’t take a moment to go up the room and wake me up?! Or give me a wake-up call or something?! Why do I have such stupid, inconsiderate friends, Pancakes?” she complained to her dog that only responded with loud, heavy breaths.
“You’re better than them. At least you stayed. Well, not that you can get out of the room by yourself anyway…” she alighted the elevator and walked towards the beach.
Damn, that’s a crowd.
Annoyed, she brought Pancakes down for a while and furiously pressed Chaeyoung’s name on her phonebook to give her a call. She put her other hand on her hips and impatiently waited for the latter to answer her call.
“Hello? Dubu?”
”Yeah hello, I would like to speak to my friends Chaeyoung and Jeongyeon, the ones who would be kind and thoughtful enough to go up the room, wake me up and not leave me alone!” Dahyun bellowed.
“Okay—woah, calm your tiddies. We’re sorry Dahyun-ah, Jinyoung oppa told us not to wake you up since you seemed tired earlier. He told us to let you rest.”
“Whatever, I’m not listening to any kinds of lie right now. Where are you?!”
“Uhm, wait. Can you spot a big inflated beer bottle? We’re near that area. Go and I’ll meet you there.”
“Fine,” she replied with a huff before hanging up.
“Pancakes, let’s go—Pancakes?”
She looked around her, and her dog was nowhere to be seen.
“Oh shit. Pancakes?!” she scrambled, looking around the crowd like a madwoman. How can she be so stupid to let go of her dog, knowing that it could wander off? She smacked herself internally, still frantically looking for the Chihuahua. Waves of relief washed over her as she finally spotted Pancakes, on her way inside a resthouse. She immediately ran off towards the area, but the moment she reached the pathway towards the house, she lost her again.
“Damn it. Pancakes! Come here! That’s trespassing!” she whisper-screamed, hoping that her dog would hear her. Ugh, this wouldn’t do, she thought as she finally decided to go inside the premises stealthily, hoping that the owner wouldn’t see her.
At some point in her search, she stopped on her tracks as she saw Sana sitting on the wooden chair on the porch, grabbing a shot from the now half-empty bottle of vodka. Slowly, she approached the sliver-haired girl.
“Uhm, excuse me, Miss Minatozaki,” She approached quietly and carefully. The girl didn’t seem to hear her so she stepped closer and tapped her on the shoulder. Sana was startled by the sudden intrusion and finally looked up with swollen eyes and drooping eyelids, her tear-stained cheeks colored with a pinkish hue, probably from the alcohol. Sana looked kind of annoyed from the disturbance, since she’s not really in a mood for any kind of social interaction right now.
“Hey, uhm, sorry to trespass and interrupt, but my dog ran off inside and I can’t find her anywhere…” she mumbled, gauging the possible reactions she could get from her. It seems like she really came at a bad time since Sana looked like she just cried buttloads of tears.
“…”
“Uh…”
“Whadyusay?”
It was slurred but Dahyun understood it just fine.
“My dog ran inside your garden, and I can’t find her. Can I ask permission to search for Pancakes?”
“Pancakes…” Sana mumbled off.
“Yeah.”
“I don’t have any pancakes in—“ a hiccup. “—kitchen.”
Dahyun mustered every bit of patience she has left in every corner of her being and smiled. She’s gonna need a lot of it if she has to talk to this drunk girl for her dog.
“No, I mean my dog’s name is Pancakes, and she’s lost in your garden.” She spoke slowly so the girl can finally process what she’s saying correctly. She chuckled lightly when Sana had her mouth open the whole time she was explaining.
Cute.
“Oh. I get it now.” Sana suddenly stood up, holding onto Dahyun for support.
“You know you can just give me permission and I’ll search for her myself, I think you need to stay on your seat. You’re drunk,” Dahyun worriedly muttered as she held Sana’s waist. She was taken aback when the girl suddenly stood upright and pushed her hands away.
“Drunk? Me?! Excuse you,” Sana pointed a finger on Dahyun, offended. “I still can finish this whole bottle by myself and give my dog a bath complete with blow-dry.” She then tried to shake off the intoxication away and straightened herself. “Ugh. Let’s go.”
Sana just led the way around her house while Dahyun did all the searching.
“Pancakes? Pancakes! Come out now!” she called the little fella out. While still looking around, she didn’t notice that Sana stopped for a while, resulting into a collision, making them both fall over, with Dahyun landing on top of Sana.
“Ack!”
Shit.
Due to gravitational force, and Dahyun being not exactly a role model for muscle strength and balance, Dahyun fell a bit hard on Sana, her face getting buried in Sana’s neck in the process. She caught a whiff of the girl’s perfume mixed with the smell of liquor and she tried to stop herself just as fast when her thoughts became focused on how intoxicating the mixture of scent is.
“Hey.” Sana grunted below her.
“Yes?”
“Stop breathing on my neck. And get off me, will you?”
“Right. Sorry,” Dahyun finally came into her senses and pushed herself up, offering a hand to Sana. It was fortunate that they landed on the soft grass and not the rocky concrete pathway.
“Are you okay?” she asked the drunk girl, who’s dusting herself off mindlessly.
“Yeah, just help me dust off—“ Sana paused, and looked behind Dahyun’s direction, her eyes grew wide. Curious and confused, Dahyun glanced behind her to see what the drunk girl had seen to elicit such a reaction and gasped.
There they saw Pancakes and Waffles… in a rather embarrassing situation. Pancakes was on top of Waffles and was dry humping her from the back.
“PANCAKES!”
“WAFFLES!”
The adrenaline rushed towards Sana’s head, washing out any trace of drunkenness. They both rushed forward towards their pets, who stopped on whatever they are doing because of the sudden intrusion. Sana and Dahyun picked their dogs up and away from each other, with Sana protectively wrapping her arms around Waffles, and Dahyun giving a good round of scolding to Pancakes. Or so she hoped that it’s what it looked like, because she was actually having a hard time suppressing her laughter.
“You need to get a hold of your horny dog! She almost snatched my baby’s V-card!” Sana yelled out, constantly petting Waffles and giving her kisses.
Now Dahyun can’t help but to let out a little chortle, which earned a glare from the latter. She stopped and cleared her throat before speaking. “Well, uh, first of all, I really am sorry for the whole commotion, and second of all, Pancakes could never steal your dog’s virginity. They’re both females.”
“She’s a female?!”
“Yeah. Don’t act so surprised though, homosexuality in animals is kinda common so it’s all good and perfectly normal,” Dahyun gave her a reassuring smile.
“I could care less if your dog’s a homo or not. Waffles clearly didn’t want any of that! That was harassment!” It may be the alcohol talking, but Sana’s really just this overprotective over her dog. Waffles then tried to claw its way out of Sana’s grasp and jumped off to the ground and ran towards Dahyun’s feet while barking in Pancakes’ direction.
“It doesn’t look like that for me,” Dahyun gave Sana a teasing remark, trying to lift the mood up a bit. She thought that the girl might need some based on the puffy eyes. “Waffles seems to want another round.”
“Okay, stop!” Sana marched towards Waffles and picked her up. “You have your dog now. Can you leave? I really am not in the mood to talk and argue with anyone.”
Dahyun’s teasing mood was suddenly dampened and was replaced with shame, and a little bit of disappointment and sadness from the tone of Sana’s dismissal. She was just trying to light the mood up but it really seemed like she’s in no mood to play around tonight.
“Y-yeah. I’m sorry again for bothering you.”
“Whatever, just go.”
Dahyun just nodded her head and turned around to walk out of the rest house. Upon reaching the end of the pathway, she then gave Sana one last glance, who’s now back at her table, pouring another full shot of vodka. She didn’t know why, and she knew she shouldn’t, but she went up to her and grabbed her wrist, stopping Sana from drinking the liquor, causing some of it to spill.
“That’s enough, you’re drunk. You should really take a rest now,” Dahyun softly said, clearly worried about the girl’s state. She doesn’t even know why she was in the first place. Sana forcefully pushed Dahyun’s hand away, irritated.
“And who are you to tell me that?”
Right. Who was she? What right does she have?
Dahyun slowly let go of Sana’s wrists as the realization hit her. Right, she’s just a stranger, who shouldn’t even be in this place. She’s intruding so much now, and it baffles her why she suddenly cared so much. Mumbling a quick apology, she hurriedly left, not minding the slight pang in her chest.