Chapter Text
This story could start from any point since Jae and Brian met. It could start from their very first meeting, or from the moment they became roommates. Or maybe from the moment they started getting closer, or when Brian started thinking of Jae on a… different light. But, for the sake of length, it will begin on the moment Brian noticed – or accepted – what those thoughts about Jae, that started crossing his mind more and more often, really meant.
Brian woke up to someone snuggled up to him. He opened his eyes, confused. Not that the situation was unusual, it really wasn’t, but Brian remembered falling asleep alone the night before, so he thought his confusion was justified. He looked down, trying to identify the culprit, only to be greeted by a head of blond hair, which was sticking in every direction. Jae. As expected.
He sighed, trying to disentangle the boy from him, but couldn’t keep a little smile from lighting up his face. ‘He looks adorable’, he thought, only to shake his head, the smile disappearing. It wasn’t the first time he thought something like that about Jae, far from that. But these thoughts were coming more and more often, and they were starting to sound less like ‘he’s cute, I want to pinch his cheeks’ and more like… well, something else, and Brian was starting to freak out. So he sighed again, trying to rub his eyes with his free hand.
He continued working on getting his limbs separated from Jae’s – the older had managed to get them quite tangled – occupying his mind with that so that it wouldn’t wander to dangerous places.
He was almost free, just trying to figure a way of getting his arm from under Jae without waking the older up, when Dowoon’s head popped out from the top bunk.
“Hyung, what are you doing?”
Brian jumped up, screaming, and ended up falling on top of Jae. The older let out an ‘Oof’, quickly sitting up, startled, making Brian fall out of the bed. Brian wanted to cry. So much time and effort, for nothing.
“What the hell, Dowoon?”
Asked the bassist, standing up, rubbing his hip where it had hit the ground. Dowoon tilted his head to the side, pouting.
“Sorry, hyung. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Brian huffed, but he could never get angry with Dowoon. It was impossible. He turned to Jae. The boy was rubbing his eyes, yawning. Brian supressed the thought he could feel forming in his mind.
“It’s ok.”
He said to Dowoon, instead. The younger was sitting cross-legged in his bed, hair as messy as Jae’s. Brian thought he looked adorable, too, but this only made him more uneasy, because there was an obvious difference in the way he thought that about Dowoon and the way he thought that about Jae. Dowoon fit in the ‘cheek pinching’ category. The bassist shook his head again.
“But what were you doing, hyung?”
Pressed the younger. Brian shrugged.
“This koala thought I looked like a good pillow and didn’t want to let me go.”
He explained. Jae sleepily blew a raspberry at him, and Brian’s heart didn’t skip a beat, not at all.
“Then why didn’t you just wake Jae hyung up, hyung?”
Asked Dowoon. Brian froze. The honest answer? He didn’t want to wake Jae up, because the boy looked so peaceful and cute when he slept, and Brian knew how tired he was, and wanted to let Jae sleep for as long as possible. But he had a reputation to keep. He couldn’t just say that, he’d be teased for the rest of his life. So he snorted.
“And let him shower first? No, thanks.”
He said, laughing. Jae pouted and Brian looked away.
“And here I thought you cared about me and how much I slept.”
Said Jae. His voice was raspy, as it was the first time he spoke since waking up, and it definitely didn’t send shivers down Brian’s spine.
“Nope. But it’s ok to dream, hyung.”
He said, and left the room smiling teasingly and ignoring the way his heart was beating unusually fast as Jae shook his head and smiled at him.
Later on that same day, Brian was sitting on the floor, trying to think of the next line for his verse, when someone sat by his side. He didn’t need to look to know it was Jae, because he recognized the smell of the boy’s shampoo. Which, by the way... oh no, he’s not going down that road right now.
“Hey.” Said the older boy, quietly. Brian hummed, a sign that it was ok for Jae to continue talking. “Sorry for going to your bed without your consent.”
This made Brian look up, closing his notebook. Jae was looking at him, as if searching for something on Brian’s eyes.
“Why are you apologizing? You never apologized before.”
He asked, confused. Jae smiled sheepishly.
“You’re right. I just… I don’t know, you seemed a bit uneasy today, when Dowoon asked you what you were doing.”
Brian shook his head.
“You know I don’t mind it when you sleep in my bed, Jae.”
He said. The ‘hyung’ was only used when they talked in Korean, which they didn’t do when they were alone. Jae nodded.
“I know. But it doesn’t hurt to make sure of that.”
Brian nodded. He knew Jae’s policy was ‘communication is the key to every and any healthy relationship’. He probably should live by that too, but right now he’d rather not. He wasn’t even communicating properly with himself, let alone with others.
“Don’t worry about it. Just try not to choke me next time, you leech.”
Jae laughed.
“What can I do? You’re very comfy.”
He joked, lying his head on Brian’s shoulder to demonstrate his point. Brian hoped the little squeak he let out could be interpreted as a chuckle.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Now get out, I need to finish this.”
Said the younger, shrugging Jae off his shoulder. The older only laughed and ruffled Brian’s hair, getting up to leave. He was already by the door when he turned around, a fake seductive smile on his lips.
“Next time you’ll be the little spoon, babe.”
He said, winking and cackling as he left. Brian was not blushing. He absolutely wasn’t. Him and Jae joked like that all the time and it had never affected him, he wouldn’t let it start now.
The rest of the day passed without any more incidents. Brian was a bit frustrated; no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t come up with anything he considered good. And this was making him anxious, especially because he had no idea what was hindering his progress. So, yeah, he was frustrated.
Dowoon had knocked on his door, earlier, to tell him the group was going home. He had simply told the maknae that he would stay a while longer, since he wanted to write at least a little bit, and the boy had nodded, telling him to not overwork himself. Brian had nodded and gone back to his notebook, glad that there would be no more interruptions.
So when there was a knock on his door, a few hours later, Brian was surprised. He looked up, only to see Jae poking his head through the door. He looked significantly at the younger, and Brian sighed. He could convince Dowoon, no problem, but Jae was a stubborn little shit. Brian had no chance and he knew it.
He put his notebook away and got up, following the older boy. Maybe it was good to get a break, anyways. He didn’t even question why Jae was still at the company.
“Though day?” Asked the older, as they made their way out of the building. Brian sighed and nodded. “Don’t worry, tomorrow will be better.”
Brian nodded again. The silence settled once more.
They walked like that for a while, in silence, but it wasn’t the comfortable silence that they sometime fell in. It was tense, for some reason, and Brian didn’t like it at all. Jae was his best friend. He was supposed to make Brian comfortable, not make him even tenser after an already shitty day. He was about to say something when Jae looked at him, and then no sound came out of Brian’s open mouth.
Jae frowned. Then he took off his jacket and handed it to Brian. The younger looked at Jae confused.
“What…?”
He started, but Jae interrupted him by impatiently putting the jacket on Brian’s shoulder. The bassist had to quickly grab it, to keep it from falling.
“You were shivering. I’m wearing warmer clothes than you, so you can keep it.”
He said. Brian was once again speechless. He raked his mind, trying to remember if Jae had done that before, but his mind was spinning a bit – it had nothing to do with the fact that the jacket smelled like Jae, not at all – and he couldn’t come up with an answer. Jae snorted, and Brian noticed he was staring. He looked away, fighting a blush, and put on the jacket. He was cold, after all. There was another moment of silence.
“But then you’ll get cold.”
Mumbled the younger. Jae laughed.
“You say that, but you’ve already put the jacket on.” He teased. Brian glared and made to take off the offensive piece of clothing, but Jae shook his head. “I’m joking, idiot. Plus, you can always hold my hand to keep me at least a little warm.”
He said, winking at the younger boy. Yeah, Brian was fucked.